So I'm deleting my Facebook. A strategy?

queenofswordsxxx · 2021-08-18T10:24:39+00:00

Yep. Deleted fb, ig, snap, all of it. It’s a strategy. If anyone’s worth having in your life, they’ll have your number and stay in touch with you via the phone/ text.

Everyone else (including orbiting LVM) is just noise.

NAthrowaway0613 · 2021-08-18T14:05:57+00:00

I have absolutely 0 social media besides LinkedIn (which isn’t quite the same). Honestly, it is personally the best thing ever.

I realized there were so many people I didn’t want updates on their life on and I didn’t want them to have updates on mine (toxic family, abusive ex, etc etc). It was a hard habit to kick at first so I literally hard deleted all my accounts (you have to request it from all the groups, it can be a pain), but it was the best for me because I couldn’t just reactivate to get my little dopamine fix.

However, my ONE regret was not pulling my old pictures off facebook first. I lost so many great pictures of my best friend and just like stupid, dumb, but young and happy photos of me and my sister who passed. That’s the one thing that still upsets me to this day

veruscka · 2021-08-18T14:02:08+00:00

Deleted mine 7 years ago. You won’t miss it.

Usual_Zucchini · 2021-08-18T15:10:50+00:00

I deleted Facebook 8 months ago and it was one of the better decisions I made as an adult.

First thing I did was make sure I had anyone important's birthday in my calendar. Turns out I already did.

Then I saved all of my photos from 15 years of having a profile. That was a pain in the ass, but I didn't want to lose them. I also downloaded a copy of my data from Facebook.

Then I posted a status saying "I'm permanently deleting this account on [date]. If I don't already have your contact info and you'd like to stay in touch, please message me." Out of 900 friends, no one did. Turns out I already have the contact info of anyone I stay in touch with regularly.

Then I deleted. It's great. The ONLY thing I miss is getting lots of well wishes and messages on my birthday, but I'll trade that for mental peace. Wish I would have done it sooner.

throwaway-fds · 2021-08-18T14:05:55+00:00

Yes, I took a year break off of all social medias. Deleted them all. I was also tired of everyone having access to me, so I gave my number to a few acquaintances/friends and deleted. If you truly wanted to speak with me instead of sending me low effort memes, there it is. It was also an easy way for me to "unfollow" people without fear of them making drama over it. I just recently made an instagram account again ONLY to follow my family to see my baby niece/nephew. No one else knows about it, and they don't need to.

Melodic_Novel6309 · 2021-08-18T14:49:29+00:00

If you do want to keep using social media, there are some other options too: Block and delete. Alternatively, set up permissions so that only select groups of people can see your posts. Facebook allows you to pre-define groups for this and Instagram has the "close friends" option. I found this to be a reasonable compromise between not feeling like meat but also being able to enjoy the benefits of social media as I see them.

glowmilk · 2021-08-18T14:15:52+00:00

This is a great strategy period, not just for dating but life in general. I’m quite selective with what I upload and who has access to me online so I don’t have much social media. I still have fb to stay connected with relatives but the account is pretty much dormant and no one can add me on it. I deleted Instagram a few months ago though. Had way too many people on there who I didn’t care about who were just following me to be nosy. I’m much happier without sharing my whole life on social media. I’d rather spend time living it. The people who I actually care about don’t need to rely on social media to get in touch with me.

HelloKalder · 2021-08-18T14:36:29+00:00

Wow, I haven't read about it on here much, but I've also done the same for personal reasons and it has made my life a lot better. Sure I can be an advocate on social media, that can be a good thing, but it also sits out in the public eye to be commented on and argued with. And I'm just not about that. I'd rather keep my life and thoughts private and share only with people who are interested in a genuine dialogue at the very least.

I reactivated my Instagram the other day and within 5 minutes remembered why I deactivated everything. So, it's back to deactivation and I probably won't be back for a long while. It has definitely helped my overall mood.

pozzalovah · 2021-08-18T15:21:12+00:00

What I like to do is not to have any personal social media and if I do need to vet a guys/girls profile just use my pseudo account and stalk ppl / ask my friends about how their profile look. At this point having no sm helped me out to vet friends/ppl in general.

placemat24 · 2021-08-18T22:21:05+00:00

Deleting social media was a g0dsend to me. I was in therapy for numerous years for anxiety and depression. I deleted facebook after a bad breakup and graduated therapy mere months after. I let people get too involved in my life and I cared too much about what other people thought of me. At the end of the day, I have less than 30 contacts on my phone, about 15 of those business or work contacts. My social life is completely revamped to people who love and care about me- people who aren't using me for money, people who stuck around after everyone cut me off after, people who dont mind that I dont do drugs and barely drink. My job requires constant travel and fleeting relationships that Im so relieved I dont have to pretend we were friends after the fact. My social life (when not traveling) has been a lot better. Hope this helps.

ENFP_Canadian · 2021-08-18T18:08:02+00:00

Omg I thought I was odd for doing this. It was following fds that made merealize that I'm not going to give access to myself online anymore.

I deleted every single social media account, and all my scholarly profiles (old job made me have them).

With my new job I just have not added my picture to any profiles and will politely decline these requests. I'm legit DONE with anyone thinking they have access to me unless I specifically allow it.

One_Bat_2525 · 2021-08-18T20:42:48+00:00

I’ve had mine deactivated for a while. I was sick of nosy coworkers (the ones that never talk to you) and the constant life updates from the same pickmes. Before I met my husband, I also had a group of LVM that would like all my pictures and all my status updates. As soon as I got with him, they stopped. It annoys me that it takes the mere presence of a significant other for men to stop being creeps.

fireforestfairy · 2021-08-18T13:50:01+00:00

I hate Facebook. Delete it if you want. The only reason why I haven't deleted mine is because I've added some friends who live abroad on Facebook and I don't have their phone number.

Me-oh-no · 2021-08-18T21:24:53+00:00

I deleted my Facebook in 2019 and my Instagram in 2020. Best decision I ever made. Not looking back. The access thing is real. I love that I embody my own physical space so much more and I have way more agency over who I do and don’t allow into my personal space (virtual / physical). I use WhatsApp among other social media sites like YouTube. I also believe in keeping a small circle and the value of face-to-face interaction, which helped 😊😊

Maude2010 · 2021-08-18T19:15:42+00:00

I deleted it a few years ago. I could be dead for all those “friends” know. They’ve completely forgotten I exist. I did try to remain in contact with people but it was futile. It’s amazing how people would comment on my posts within minutes but “don’t see” or ignore direct messages on Messenger for months or even forever.

ArugulaIsAwesome · 2021-08-18T23:08:28+00:00

I have to keep Facebook for some of my connections but last year I went through and did a HUGE clean out.

I unfriended hundreds of people.

I literally went through every single photo and removed any that were deemed inappropriate or questionable.

I also went through every single one of my statuses and removed any that could be misunderstood.

I was always over sharing online and now I’m happy to now have a fresh clean slate.

chinchaslyth · 2021-08-18T23:09:50+00:00

I deleted my FB. It feels amazing. I have temporarily disabled my IG too.

Honestly it feels amazing. I need the peace and quiet rn as I focus on myself and my projects. I also care more about the people who have my number directly and can text or call or meet in person if they care that much.

It shows me who is a real friend. And helping me trim the fat even more in my life.

night_glitter · 2021-08-18T14:41:26+00:00

To share a different perspective: my ex-h deleted his FB when some of our mutual friends (who stuck with me) started calling him out on his posts, about his infidelity. (He later restored it after a friend cleanup.) So if a guy has no social media, I’m gonna assume he’s hiding something. I wouldn’t necessarily assume the same of a woman, though. That said, there are lots of little things you can pick up from looking at what a guy posts on social media (and who he follows/friends), and I’d consider myself foolish to purposefully ignore it by not using social media. It’s def one of my vetting tools.

jaynine33 · 2021-08-18T15:49:41+00:00

I’ve done it. Best decision I’ve ever made for my mental health :)

gluckkk · 2021-08-18T22:54:24+00:00

LVM and others can use the information you have in your profiles to manipulate you. For example, pretend they like XYZ band or XYZ hobby. Just delete all of them and get a ghost account. I have one for a certain social media because it requires people to be logged in to see even public accounts, and I like to use it just to browse my favorite brands and such.

Delete all of your public information. As time passes I find that people seem less and less surprised that I don’t have FB, etc. Plus guys feel way weirder asking me for my number than my FB (they love FB and other SM because it is so low effort), so when I tell them I don’t have FB they tend to back TF up 👋🏼 ✌🏻

Few-Fortune-2391 · 2021-08-18T23:55:54+00:00

Social media is just about getting your data and advertising to you. It doesn't absolutely nothing for your relationships imo.

modernmedusaa · 2021-08-19T00:25:19+00:00

According to this site Facebook never really deletes your information which I find creepy

https://tosdr.org

Don’t sign up to new apps with a Facebook login....they’re creating a huge network of data on you that we have no idea what they’re doing with

szb8 · 2021-08-18T11:21:45+00:00

I've done the same thing..i was anxious and annoyed all day because of fb "friends"..it got to a point where most of my male classmates or men i knew a bit wrote to me almost daily..trying to nag me into a relationship..and got even more pushy and annoying when i said no..friends and family got weird about it.".Heii..it s the modern world,how are you going to get a man? ..With social media if someone sees you and likes you they ask around for your insta or fb..(bla bla) like i would date a boy..too scared to approach me in real life or court me..you know..like a man not a child..😂you did the right thing..

mercatorblue · 2021-08-18T18:38:27+00:00

I deleted my FB about a decade ago lol when I realized I didn’t care about anyone’s Buzzfeed quiz results or FB informing me that “Annette H liked American Airlines” or whatever random brand someone clicked Like on.

dancedancedance7 · 2021-08-19T01:18:25+00:00

I personally enjoy my Facebook for keeping in touch with close friends, classmates, and scheduling events.

I put my profile to "private" so random people cannot see anything about me. I also reject most friend requests and periodically do a friend delete sweep without any heads up.

PsychologicalPay2353 · 2021-08-18T10:39:57+00:00

That would depend on your agenda.My personal reasons for having fb? I have a page there where I raise awareness about health, promote and educate people on various health tips 'n' tricks in the hopes they will stop pushing suppositories down their throat (literally.)

It also helps me get momentum for when I finally start working in my field as a doctor. Tomorrow, it could help me become the next minister of health in my country. Who knows? It's getting pretty popular there.

But my personal fb page? All private. You can see the town I live in and some youtube links I posted. No one can message me, who isn't a friend of a friend. And my friend list is small.

My personal profile is followed by 10k people, but they can't really see much, and I don't really care. My pictures are outdated and you could never connect them to my current self because I got tattoos now and a completely different hairstyle.

Struggleis4real · 2021-08-19T07:17:57+00:00

Deleted most of socials (except FB - because family) at the start of pandemic and very few have reached out to me. Best thing for my mental health and I don’t have to deal with LVM orbiters anymore. And ever since I’ve gone off the radar, a copycat “friend” has claimed a new victim. Funny how living your best life works.

Any_Indication_2754 · 2021-08-19T14:29:09+00:00

I dont miss fb at all. It's a complete cesspit of nonsense. Once I deleted it tho, people got WEIRD on me, so be ready for that. Dont be afraid to say "fb is complete waste of time". I have instagram but the reels annoy me and make me want to delete, but I have some of my favorite relatives on there and I like seeing the pics. I only keep real life friends and family there. I've never used snapchat.

Title	So I'm deleting my Facebook. A strategy?
Author	fancypantsdance92
Upvotes	241
Comments	52
Date	August 18, 2021 10:21 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/p6odi1/so_im_deleting_my_facebook_a_strategy/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/so-im-deleting-my-facebook-a-strategy.1058107 https://theredarchive.com/post/1058107

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