Four years for choking her during sex. This is not okay.

AyemHerself · 2021-09-08T02:02:40+00:00

Not just that, I'm not convinced this was an accident. He was cheating on his wife, he was under the influence (in vino veritas), and he made no effort to get help after the fact. But because he could claim they liked "rough sex," he gets a reduced sentence.

Nobody-wants-ur-PP · 2021-09-07T23:35:31+00:00

And this ladies is why we are against BDSM in this sub.

According to this article, this murderer claims that they've always had consentual rough sex, the post-mortem did not find signs of active or prolonged resistance, and now a woman is dead and there's no one to speak for her because she was one of the "undesired" in society and it's easy to explain away her death, because she has mental health issues and other "problems" that society can conveniently blame her death on, as if her destiny were to die in one way or another at a young age so why not this way. At least, according to the murderer, she "seemed to enjoy it" when they've done this in the past. It's so easy to spin this story about her and make the reader feel like it was an accident, there was nothing that anyone could do to help her and at least she didn't suffer.

The problem with this whole story is that none of it is in this woman's words. She is dead. She can no longer speak. I imagine that if she could talk to us from the beyond, she would say how sad she is to leave her children without a mother; how scared she was when this murderer was choking the air out of her lungs and she felt her life force departing her body; how she was desperate for something good in her life and thought she would find it through the validation of being wanted, even if it meant having "rough sex" with this married scrote who couldn't even be bothered to call the police right away when he found her unresponsive in bed next to him.

No, her side of the story will never be told. It will be suppressed like so many women's stories, because they're no longer there to tell it.

capricious_robot · 2021-09-08T00:44:13+00:00

Agreed, 4 years is not enough but damn are those 4 years going to be rough for that milquetoast looking man.

queenofswordsxxx · 2021-09-08T01:57:41+00:00

“Pybus said he arranged to go to Moss’s house to have sex on 6 February this year, after his wife had gone to bed. “

Oh so he had a wife and cheated on her too. Hope she’s doing ok…

arnezuara · 2021-09-08T02:07:58+00:00

I hope he gets his fair share in jail. Men who enjoy these “kinks” are rapists and murderers.

lilac-hiraeth · 2021-09-07T23:32:50+00:00

What an absolute piece of shit! This is why we don’t do kink and casual sex, ladies! No pathetic porn sick dick is worth your life.

lansburysoda · 2021-09-08T03:03:46+00:00

So he murdered her and had a politically correct excuse and got away with it. Disgusting what this world is coming to for women. I’m glad I’m abstinent.

Protoetype · 2021-09-08T02:32:37+00:00

And how did they know he wasn't raping her again?

Unlikely-Marzipan · 2021-09-08T10:43:21+00:00

We are literally encouraging a generation of narcissistic psychopaths. Too many men go straight for the rough bdsm, the choking, slapping, suffocation, on the rise because of porn. There’s this saying that “they do it because they think women like it, because they do in porn.” - no. I don’t believe that for a second. That’s gaslighting and letting these men off the hook! They do it because THEY have desensitised their brain to levels where they enjoy hurting women during sex - sadism. Part of the dark triad. And these men don’t care when a woman says no, or even really allow her to say no (sorry, but um, a woman’s reaction to being choked by not saying “stop” doesn’t mean she likes it - she could very well be terrified! I know I have been in that situation!)

I have even removed a guy’s hand multiple times and he would put it back. My gfs said “well maybe he thinks that’s part of the game.” - no. He didn’t think that. He just didn’t give a fuck until I finally had to guts to tell him to never do it again after I was bruised and couldn’t breathe properly the next day.

This is a terrifying story.

Counsellors have told me time and time again that a man who strangles his partner (yes. Even during sex) is 7 times more likely to kill her. There’s research on it, which I’ll find another time.

I’m sick of us letting men off with their excuses they thought “women liked it” or “she didn’t tell me to stop” - she was terrified and couldn’t breathe you dickhead! OR maybe she did, but he’s not around to tell the story now is she. And the reason they think women like it (playing devils advocate here, if they do)... it’s Because they cannot empathise with women, they are then as objects - which is exactly what narcissists see their victims as.

I’m fcking furious.

I bet he has no guilt. No empathy. Typical psychopath. When is this BS going to stop.

Technusgirl · 2021-09-07T23:04:50+00:00

Only 4 years for killing someone!? He should be in there for life!

ciciplum · 2021-09-08T08:32:21+00:00

He got in the car after 24 beers, too. Endangering everyone on the road. Absolute insanity.

tzijo · 2021-09-08T01:57:57+00:00

I wonder how many men would consent to getting the life choked out of them especially by another man.

Unlikely-Marzipan · 2021-09-08T10:45:29+00:00

Also, brain damage can occur from just a few minutes of choking. I had an ex who choked me to the point of bruising and he laughed and said “ooops” when I told him to never do it again. Then preceded to gaslight me with a stupid smirk on his face saying I ask him to do it. He was adamant I did. No I fcking did not!!! Anyway, after speaking with counsellors, they advised usually they get women to get medical attention if they’ve been choked to the point of bruising, because brain damage can occur so quickly.

HoneyBouquet · 2021-09-08T04:26:36+00:00

A friend of mine (used to be a pickme when she was younger) had a guy strangle her for 10 seconds during intercourse without discussing it beforehand or asking for consent.

She was terrified after and dumped him. All he told her was he liked it "rough". She is doing much better but she dodged a huge bullet.

That man will end up killing a woman someday.

luvmyvulvaxoxo · 2021-09-08T13:17:10+00:00

So if a man likes being stabbed during sex we can just do it?

Look at how much time women who have actual evidence of years of being abused get vs this piece of shit.

Laws are made by men, for men.

This is why we need more women in law enforcement and government.

catlady4u · 2021-09-07T23:28:31+00:00

Hopefully a big, burly lifer will choke this POS to death during sex in jail.

Philodendronfanatic · 2021-09-08T09:23:17+00:00

There's one thing I always wonder when reading about incidents like this: is there any proof she even consented to this?

Edit: I don't mean to say you can, I mean because it's often used as an argument to reduce sentencing.

I don't think choking is justifiable in any way. It shouldn't be done. I'm also against BDSM. But we need to acknowledge that there's a huge amount of pressure for younger women to be sexually experimental or up for trying anything to 'see if you like it' or whatever.

The term 'kink' could mean anything from 'a bit of gentle spanking' which isn't life-threatening in any way all the way to things you'd see in a slasher film.

I wonder if a woman describing herself as kinky online or towards friends is automatically taken as consent to being strangled and therefore it becomes a tragic accident in the eyes of the prosecutors instead of murder.

I wonder how often a young woman met up with a guy and once she was in a vulnerable position did a whole host of things she never consented to and no-one believed her because she thought she was kinky for, I don't know, enjoying a bit or roleplay or something and told people that so as to not seem prude.

Let's face it 4 years is at the lower end of the 2-10 and sometimes life people get for manslaughter. So many cases like this seem to result in little punishment for the perpetrators and I wonder how much of that is because a woman described herself as kinky without going into specifics and that was taken as her consenting to being strangled.

asupernova91 · 2021-09-08T05:59:34+00:00

Note how the use a picture of him in tears, looking vulnerable and scared. Fuck that. He’s not the victim here.

Equal-Ear2312 · 2021-09-08T10:05:49+00:00

look at his face.

it's the Pikachu face when the judge tells him he's gonna go to jail.

not a tear shed for the life he took.

he's only sowwy he got caught.

this:

“It seems that strangling a woman to death is still viewed in law as an unfortunate accident, rather than terrible serious violence,” said a spokeswoman from We Can’t Consent To This, which campaigns against the use of “rough sex” defences in cases involving violence against women and girls.

&nThis:

Earlier this year the government clarified the law to restate the broad legal principle “that a person cannot consent to actual bodily harm or to other more serious injury or, by extension, to their own death”.

he used the rough sex that got too far trope.... awwww.... 4 years in prison is not enough!

not only is he utter LVM but he also cheating scum. he is married to another woman and had been having "rough" sex with the woman he choked to death for 3 years, knowing she was a vulnerable individual. She lived alone and her kids stayed with the father. She was known to have poor physical and mental health. And here come this monster...

daisy_0720 · 2021-09-08T18:54:35+00:00

Please can we stop calling it choking.

It is strangulation.

It is attempted murder.

Hot_Procedure1648 · 2021-09-07T23:38:16+00:00

What a vile POS, needless to say I'm going celibate until they fix these laws. That would deter these pathetic toe rags (Plentiful in the UK) from even thinking about shit like this. Because what's stopping these men from crying but my peepee and BDSM, when the women clearly never consented to be degraded by this loser? Usually it's welfare men that's the worse offenders, because the government funds their lifestyle they think they're untouchable by the law and think they can act like a nuisance . Seriously I've heard one of these men's exes yell at them for chasing minors...(?) To think this is what what taxes go towards, they aren't even human at this point.

janestnycrk4 · 2021-09-08T19:05:15+00:00

And if the woman would have had a chance to defend her self, she would have gotten 30 years. The justice system is a joke.

Jo_Jo-5 · 2021-09-08T00:17:23+00:00

That's incredibly heartbreaking. 4yrs is not even close to being long enough for taking a life. Things regarding sentencing needs to change

muiegarda1 · 2021-09-08T21:24:28+00:00

Boo hoo, look at him crying, let me play you a song on the world's smallest violin. Poor scrote 😭

Title	Four years for choking her during sex. This is not okay.
Author	One_Bat_2525
Upvotes	299
Comments	50
Date	September 7, 2021 10:52 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/pjy1wg/four_years_for_choking_her_during_sex_this_is_not/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/four-years-for-choking-her-during-sex-this-is-not.1067954 https://theredarchive.com/post/1067954

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