Weirdest experience I've ever had at the doctor

yeahhh22 · 2021-12-11T05:08:09+00:00

Trust your gut. I've had weird experiences with male doctors too.

Novemberinthechair · 2021-12-11T05:04:29+00:00

Nope, you're not overreacting. Your reproductive goals or lack thereof are not any of his business.

Platipus6 · 2021-12-11T05:29:38+00:00

Did we have the same doc? Mine kept going on about kids, telling me all the ways I could make it happen. Ignoring the part where I Don't Want Kids.

I'm insisting on a woman doctor for all my future appointments. Men are getting creepier.

subgirlygirl · 2021-12-11T05:12:28+00:00

Not overreacting. At best, he was awkward and socially inept. At worst, he absolutely overstepped and was fishing for your relationship status or who knows what, and depending on how you responded, it could've gotten a lot worse. If you're comfortable doing so, you might consider emailing a complaint or 'concern' to the hospital. Even if it didn't rise to the level of harassment (based on their criteria), it was inappropriate. And if he did it to you, chances are pretty good he's done it - or is doing it - to others. If they don't add it to his existing file, they need to start one.

Candid_Check_4843 · 2021-12-11T05:36:24+00:00

Your reaction is perfectly valid. He definitely overstepped the boundaries of medical professionalism. You were in a vulnerable position, and his medical training and common sense should have made it obvious to him what is and is not ok to say.

I would file a complaint about him to his supervisor and stick to female doctors for sensitive procedures like mammograms. If I were in your position, I would be so furious about his creepy disrespectful behavior that I would write a Google maps review publically calling him out and warning other women to stay away; make him look bad to his colleagues and to hospital management.

Lastly, from my reading of your post, you seem to regard doctors very highly, perhaps to the point where they cannot be questioned or disagreed with. Remember that they are also regular people and it's good to be assertive, push back, and advocate for yourself when needed :)

randomgirl34861 · 2021-12-11T06:32:09+00:00

If your early physical development was relevant to the screening, it should have discussed it with more tact. I’m not a doctor, but so much breasts is just a sexual and odd thing to say? Saying a significant amount of breast tissue or something like would have been much better. Words matter. When you’re in the medical field, you need to choose your words carefully and you’re taught how to. To finish his education, he can’t be that dumb. I truly believe he knew the proper language and just didn’t use it because he got some strange enjoyment out of making you feel awkward.

iguanidae · 2021-12-11T09:44:58+00:00

Your doctor sounds like an incel. Why is he talking about his relationship status and being a forever alone to his female patient?

In the future definitely ask for a female doctor. You're allowed to do so.

StrawberryMoon3 · 2021-12-11T07:31:41+00:00

Lesson #1 don't frequent male medical staff

Davina33 · 2021-12-11T07:20:09+00:00

This is inappropriate, the question about how much breast you had at 12 made me feel very sick. You not overreacting at all. I used to be of the mind to never complain about medical professionals and I have suffered for it. I think you should consider making a complaint.

I had one male GP who was obsessed with my ethnic background. He would stare at me like some animal on display at the zoo and always commented on it without fail. He checked my medium brown skinned hand for signs anaemia and wouldn't let it go. I was only 23 then and he left the practice but I wish I had complained. I have a lot of health problems so I'm always in and out of hospital, doctors and so forth. Please pass your concerns on about the radiologist.

DivineGoddess1111111 · 2021-12-11T07:41:45+00:00

I will only see women now for any health care needs. I have had enough of creepy doctors and other health care providers.

Japanese_Lasagna · 2021-12-11T09:09:20+00:00

Classic case of super awkward male doctor who doesn’t know how to properly talk to women, especially female patients. I recommend having a female doctor in the future.

FuckSakez · 2021-12-11T10:54:08+00:00

You are not overreacting at all. This was straight up inappropriate and unprofessional.

He should have had a female or chaperone present while doing the ultrasound for your comfort. He should not have bough up such personal questions where you were so vulnerable and exposed. Please make a complaint. Document this and insist on a female staff member to be present next time.

Imagine how many people have had the same experience. Words matter and he used the wrong ones. His training taught him better. He has a script to stick to. His relationship status is none of your concern and irrelevant to your appointment. He will receive a warning and will be conscious of his words and not creeping on his patients in the future.

hensbanex · 2021-12-11T12:56:02+00:00

I have walked out of appointments with male techs or doctors who made me uncomfortable and filed a Quality of Care complaint with my insurance company. I now call in advance and ensure I am scheduled with a female doctor and female techs. I’m so sorry this guy was a weird creep.

Phoenix__Rising2018 · 2021-12-11T08:01:17+00:00

First of all, report this pervert.

Second, don't ever go to a man for any intimate exam ever again. They're almost all like this. Everyone lies to young women to keep them vulnerable and "nice".

gingerwabisabi · 2021-12-11T05:28:06+00:00

Please report it both to the hospital and his licensing association. The hospital should have an ombudsman who can help you make an official complaint. If he gets a few similar reports, hopefully his license will be taken away and he can go be a creep elsewhere - or, hopefully, he might learn with just one complaint.

ShieldMaidenLagertha · 2021-12-11T06:05:29+00:00

Eew. No, you were being interviewed to be his gf/baby incubator. So wrong!

oscine23 · 2021-12-11T14:39:04+00:00

You’re not even safe at the Dr. Kinda sounds like he was trying to pick u up!

When I was 23 I was out of state and had a gynecological issue. I ended up with a male gyno. He inserted his finger in my anus without forwarning and told me he had to do that because my uterus was tilted. Yes, it’s very tilted. But no doctor before or since has EVER needed to do that to check my cervix. I didn’t even realize I was violated until right now. I’d forgotten all about it. 🤮

Yogacat4 · 2021-12-11T13:31:37+00:00

Definitely not overreacting! He sounds scary af. I had a married dentist before that casually asked me out for drinks! Lol! So it runs the gamut with them smashing boundaries without provocation. I didn’t report but was able to switch practices to a woman that went to a top dental school and the experience and overall atmosphere is more pleasant. I’d definitely request a woman for future appointments though to be safe.

The_Cat_Empress · 2021-12-11T14:31:52+00:00

First off, men have NO right to tell women they should have kids. They do barely any of the work so they should have none of the say. This guy was inappropriate and it’s like he never talked to a young woman before. Men are such aliens sometimes!! Disgusting!! I hope your doctors are all female now!

kinkardine · 2021-12-11T09:52:27+00:00

I do not know your culture, I came from a doctor’s family and it was utterly frustrating that in my culture doctors are never going to be satisfied unless you gave birth to two kids before you turn 30, that is the most ethical thing to do with all your baby making organs to them, no matter how progressive or modern they are- all they want for people is to make babies- otherwise half of their job will be gone!

motherchuchi · 2021-12-11T18:00:55+00:00

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all_or_nothing_bet · 2021-12-11T18:26:09+00:00

Ew, I can't stand people like him! Here is the tip that will help you to deal with asshats like this one: don't be afraid to say, "I don't feel like talking right now" and don't engage in further conversation.

It's very effective! And don't tiptoe around them.

You reminded me about one doctor who I had to see several times and who couldn't shut up during my initial visit, asking me pretty personal and invasive questions.

I just said "I don't feel like chatting with you, honestly. Can you please just do your job so I can go home?" Since then, he had been very professional and only discussed what was necessary for my care.

Similar-Tart-4848 · 2021-12-11T12:45:51+00:00

Complain! I would.

Emergency-Feed8216 · 2021-12-11T16:52:33+00:00

YOU ARE NOT OVERREACTING. The guy's a perv. You could report the entire conversation to the hospital board without editorializing, simply saying it made you uncomfortable. Then always request a female ultrasound tech in future.

randomgirl34861 · 2021-12-11T19:41:57+00:00

Ok so I know I already commented… but this post has been rolling around in my brain and now I‘ve become angry that he was like c’monn it’s kidssss to you.

Given his position, he knows that you’re risking your body, mental health and potentially your life for kids. It’s a very serious thing. And he’s out here saying c’monn just like someone would be like c’monn try the cupcakes I made or c’monn just stay for one beer 😡

ladylabrys · 2021-12-11T20:12:26+00:00

Trust your gut and switch doctors if you can!

I unfortunately had breast cancer which meant I suddenly had to meet with TONS of doctors, and unfortunately most of them were male. That included my radiologist and oncologist who gave me the creeps (they both seemed a little too eager to check my breasts...). But my mammogram/ultrasound doctor didn't give me any bad vibes at all, which was nice.

Encouraging you to have kids is definitely inappropriate behavior from a doctor!! Especially in such a nagging way!

MorthaP · 2021-12-11T20:37:10+00:00

I don't go to male doctors anymore if it's avoidable without huge effort. I had a pediatrician who was gross to me when I was like 14, and later some other male doctor who would always put his hands on my knees when talking to me with no reason, etc... go to women if you can.

huskyhockey451 · 2021-12-13T00:22:56+00:00

When I was in middle school my pediatrician told me in front of my mom that I need to start shaving my legs and armpits 💀

Jaelismyhomegirl · 2021-12-14T00:49:47+00:00

Ewwwwwww! Can you report him to the hospital?

Title	Weirdest experience I've ever had at the doctor
Author	motherchuchi
Upvotes	400
Comments	47
Date	December 11, 2021 5:00 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/rds2yg/weirdest_experience_ive_ever_had_at_the_doctor/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/weirdest-experience-ive-ever-had-at-the-doctor.1087494 https://theredarchive.com/post/1087494

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