How do you stop putting hot girls on a pedestal?

SuccessGaming · 2022-06-15T13:35:13+00:00

What makes them hot to you is the real question. For example looks are NOT everything.. realizing this is important

therealistone · 2022-06-15T16:16:17+00:00

Level up, learn female nature, chase dreams, work on goals, stay on your purpose and the women eventually come. Few men realize that a woman is not the prize, you are the prize once you decide to become the best version of you. Women chase confident men of value they can't get free attention and validation from. Focus your money, energy, attention, & time on improving yourself and watch your life and people change around you. Always love yourself first king.

PaleontologistNo2785 · 2022-06-15T14:08:18+00:00

By getting rejected by hot girls multiple times a day

Robofrogg1 · 2022-06-15T14:22:46+00:00

Love yourself. Know your value.

mrblack-- · 2022-06-15T13:41:11+00:00

Imagine them taking a shit

2022-06-15T21:39:15+00:00

Treat them like fat chicks

Zealousideal6669 · 2022-06-15T14:24:50+00:00

Simply treat them as human beings and realize that it doesn't really matter how hot the girl is or how awesome a personality she has, she's not a prize. if you treat her as an object that you wanna achieve to prove your ex was wrong to break up with you, to prove to your haters that you can get girls, you're already fucked. you're the most valuable person in your life. you're the only person that you can rely on in any circumstances so yes, care about her personality, and wanna get to know her but the more important question is. How to put yourself on your pedestal?

ArjunVermaReddit · 2022-06-15T17:19:19+00:00

Well look beyond their looks and personality and see if theyre good people, see how they treat you and treat others. If its all good, by all means, theyre amazing people and DO put them on the pedestal. If not, see them for what they really are and search for someone who can do it all

2022-06-16T00:08:27+00:00

I realized a lot of it had to do with my porn addictions. Now i can talk to women no problem

caesarfecit · 2022-06-15T18:18:06+00:00

Not seeing them through the lens of my wants and needs and seeing them instead as they are. Men idealize women because they see her as a pathway to meeting their needs. That's what women bitch about when they talk about feeling objectified. It's boring and irritating for her, because she can tell that you've reduced her in your mind to a blow-up doll and she ain't feeling that unless she actually is.

But when you can put your thirst to one side, then you see women very clearly and realize that some women who look like dimes are also the ones you really want nothing to do with.

Ordinary_Yam1866 · 2022-06-15T22:00:19+00:00

First you will get angry over the injustice of it all, then you will get depressed, and in the end you will realize they are just people like anyone else, with perks, flaws, good and bad sides.

musafirlinguist · 2022-06-15T22:02:06+00:00

I was really nervous talking to girls I thought were attractive. Joke around. Don’t take it serious. That’s the most helpful thing. Then you loosen up and realize they are just another girl at the end of the day.

SpinCity07 · 2022-06-16T00:30:26+00:00

I think the best thing I heard is if you want trust in a relationship you can’t force people to be with you. When you put them on the pedestal, it’s because you’re worried about losing them. To have a good relationship, you have to be willing to let them have autonomy and not try to control them. This can also be done through gratitude by appreciating the positive things in your life. All and all, they are not the be all, end all of your happiness that your ego would like you to believe.

colamonda · 2022-06-17T04:34:00+00:00

Ok, I hear ya and this is what worked for me.

First off, people on this thread saying things like "realize that she is human" or "value yourself first" and all that nonsense, have either not gotten results or they've forgotten what it's like at the start of their seduction journey.

As far as I've seen, there is no jedi mind trick that can suddenly stop you from valuing beauty- hell it's evolutionarily programmed into us men. Only 2 things helped for me-

Become better as man(Start a biz, improve your body, create art, learn martial arts, having a thriving social life etc.) Basically add value to people and see them reward you with status, pussy, money etc. Now you can't do all of it at the same time so just focus on one at a time.
Do cold approach day game. AND PRIORITIZE GOING AFTER THE HOTTEST GIRLS WHEN YOU SEE THEM. Eventually you'll get one to go on a date; get into bed; become a gf etc etc. And after some time you get desensitized to beauty. And for a fact, the ONLY jedi mind trick that works for this is having a naked beautiful girl next to you.

But after that success focus on building yourself. Value is the greatest unlock for everything in life.

ftdrain · 2022-06-15T14:53:59+00:00

Its hard, its something we do our entire lives, it takes a shift in beliefs/values and time, meanwhile you should try your best to be concious of this tendency and behave accordingly. I look better than 90% of the male population and still overvalue hot girls because Ive always done that since I was a but a young buck, it takes time.

Alone_Runner_6569 · 2022-06-15T17:44:00+00:00

The most beautiful people in existence still get explosive diarrhea sometimes

SortPrestigious · 2022-06-15T13:36:51+00:00

Tell yourself “ I’m better than that bitch. I’m doing her a favor “

2022-06-15T18:46:13+00:00

Work on your goals outside of dating man, when you focus on just your work, hustle, and grind… hot girls aren’t as important. You’ll catch looks and attention from hot girls soon enough, and be careful because once you start to grab this attention you’ll want to focus on the girls… don’t. Keep working, keep hustling, and keep grinding. The girls will have to either conform and submit to you and your time, or they’ll have to move along. You ain’t got time for them, you’ve got work to do.

fag432 · 2022-06-15T14:52:26+00:00

See a fart prank video on YouTube. You'll notice those who laugh the most are hot girls. They aren't that special.

politits · 2022-06-15T16:12:22+00:00

They’re just people like anyone else. The fact that you even categorize them as “hot girls” shows that you think of them differently. They’re not another species. It’s an individual who you’re attracted to. Just treat that person like another guy who you’d be interested in being friends with and getting to know better. The more you remember that they’re just people and get over your own attraction to them the faster you’ll be able to approach them and not get nervous.

epimpstyle · 2022-06-15T16:45:52+00:00

Do not go to extremes dude!

If you are friendly and nice to everyone it doesn't mean that you are weak, if you are polite it doesn't mean you are not cool ... and so on...

I recommend you to watch a few videos on youtube from Social Animal, you will see how many normal guys (average looking guys), they are able to pick up girls without problems.

Better to forget the theories about being and acting like an Alpha guy, be friendly and polite with everyone, you will see that the life is beautiful.

5ive_Rivers · 2022-06-15T16:45:55+00:00

Put yourself on that pedestal instead.

Ancient-Position-696 · 2022-06-15T20:09:14+00:00

As you're checking out a hot girl, think, She will sh!t in my bed and leave it for me to find. I.e. Johnny Depp and Amber Heard

BulletReaper · 2022-06-15T20:11:10+00:00

By realizing that most of them aren’t really that hot under the pounds of makeup and multiple Instagram filters they use. Most of these women are honest to god fake, they will literally look like an entirely different person once the mask comes off. After all a while you start to realize that a pretty face really isn’t worth much.

revente · 2022-06-15T13:32:04+00:00

By stopping putting hot girls on a pedestal.

You are a conscious adult, you have like 100% control over that.

ozzzy83 · 2022-06-15T13:43:41+00:00

By changing your mindsets and wrong beliefs. Why would you put her above you just because she's born like that? Lmao

derealizedpig · 2022-06-15T13:47:37+00:00

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Only_Commercial_774 · 2022-06-15T14:26:38+00:00

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MooseWhiskers · 2022-06-15T16:30:24+00:00

Simple: stop putting them on pedestals.

derealizedpig · 2022-06-15T13:56:20+00:00

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Titty_Slicer_5000 · 2022-06-15T14:22:11+00:00

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2022-06-15T15:07:43+00:00

See them as not being worth the effort. It’ll make you take your interactions with them less seriously which petty effectively contracts the pedestal tendency

khali23 · 2022-06-15T16:05:26+00:00

Look at your thoughts and how you think about yourself. When you think you're a catch and worthy you don't put others on a high pedestal like that. Actually, women (including the 10's) are much more likely to put YOU on a pedestal when you're confident and sure of yourself . In addition, you need to realize and understand there is an unfathomable amount of women in the world. Actually, there is an unfathomable amount of good looking women (8-10) out there. Based on that, her looks aren't really that special and you'll definitely come across another woman who looks just as good if not better. So next time you see a girl and start fantasizing about your future together and start putting her on a pedestal because she's so pretty, draw yourself back to reality which is that beauty is in abundance. Combine these two ideas and that should help greatly.

also u/revente kind of has a point. I think they are saying to take control of your thoughts and actions (which is definitely something you can 100% do). Be conscious and realize when you're putting someone on a pedestal and stop yourself.

One thing you should note though: Whatever you think will show someway somehow. Forcing yourself to stop buying things for women and treating them like a celebrity is a start, but if you never fully internalize the idea that you're a 10 and you definitely deserve her just as much as she deserves you the simp behavior might show every now and then and she'll pick up on it.

2022-06-15T16:21:08+00:00

meditate, in a way give yourself an increased ego almost as if you have main character syndrome to put yourself above anyone else. if all else fails imagine she’s really ugly.

KingLouhichi · 2022-06-15T16:42:15+00:00

Honest advice, just start to not give a fuck

ZachMoore88 · 2022-06-15T16:54:51+00:00

Pay more attention to their flaws....both physical and internal.

TheMemeinator_420 · 2022-06-15T17:14:17+00:00

You have to realize that they’re not these perfect beings that they appear as and they have their flaws and insecurities just like the rest of us.

premedchunsa · 2022-06-15T17:14:56+00:00

Honestly, it’s hard no doubt. Let’s not frame it as something that’s easy to overcome. In addition to what everyone suggested in terms of improving your “value” as a man, I would also suggest to date more hot women. Once you date one, the next one and the one after that one becomes easier.

Sup3rHD · 2022-06-15T17:29:24+00:00

You have been brainwashed for years by the society.
So everyday repeat in ur mind: im better, they are not better then me
It takes days, month but after a while u can brainwash urself to normal :)

Separate-Stage1254 · 2022-06-15T17:38:04+00:00

Here's a trick a friend suggested for back when I used to get really nervous around hot girls. This may sound kind of crude, but just imagine what she would look like after sex with you. All hot and sweaty, exhausted and natural. Imagining her utterly relaxed around me, always made me utterly relaxed around her.

Amikatey · 2022-06-15T17:39:30+00:00

It's high time people stop compressing answers and throwing it at redditors who just might lack any form of experience.. You can give someone a thousand reasons to not think low of himself compared to another girl but he wount just get himself to do it when he should(in the morment).. THE TRUTH IS; you can't stay all day and read 174 comments on NOT PEDESTALISING a girl. You have to go out and talk to more of said type of girl.. Then you begin to realise, she has Crappy conversation skills,she struggles with arcent, she's insecure about her attractivenes,.. And alot of others.. But for now as a beginer you have to delibrately watch what you do in irder not to appear bellow her on the social ladder, you have see yourself as her equal on the social ladder, even if you don't believe in yourself the frame and vibe you come with and maintain, that is what they girl thinks of you and believes, do this to 5+ more of thesame type of girl and you begin to believe in yourself, and all the reasons a random person was giving you on reddit becomes your reality. In short Terms YOU HAVE TO DELIBRATELY TAKE HER OF THE PEDESTAL AT THE START..

2022-06-15T17:42:35+00:00

By fucking a few of them.

ParticularAmazing112 · 2022-06-15T17:46:33+00:00

Make hot female friends, JUST FRIENDS. They don’t even have to be super hot, just make some good looking female friends. The more women you are surrounded by, the less you put them on a pedestal. Even better, if you can become a roommate with one of them.

Once you see they are just human as you, they shit, wake up not looking so good, etc… it is actually simple.

Skizznitt · 2022-06-15T17:59:02+00:00

Focus more on yourself, your needs, your goals, bringing your self worth to a higher level will give you a better perspective.

2022-06-15T18:03:24+00:00

Yes. I realized through experience that the hotter the woman , the worse she treats men. When you realize that almost every “hot girl”is likely a conceited, self- absorbed narcissist, it’s easy to not put them on a pedestal. They’re already high enough.

silc789 · 2022-06-15T18:10:04+00:00

Bang a few of them. More often than not the hottest 5% of girls are the least fun to hang out with. No personality because they rely on their looks only.

After that you'll realize 7-8s who have good and easy going personality are way more fun than 9-10s who can't carry a conversation nor have a sense of humor.

Fapandwarmshowers · 2022-06-15T18:34:48+00:00

I just treat every woman like a they are a teenager

sleepstages · 2022-06-15T19:02:09+00:00

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sleepstages · 2022-06-15T19:55:07+00:00

Look at the Catatombs of Paris. You'll see thousands of skulls who look exactly a like. Realize that some of these skulls were very very hot girls one day....

Then-Compote6185 · 2022-06-15T19:56:15+00:00

Do this ,make a tinder account with someone attractive's photo and talk to the hot girls their, you'll see how empty shells they are.

Excellent-Map-5530 · 2022-06-15T19:58:21+00:00

If you want to be happy for the rest of the your life, never make a pretty woman your wife! From my personal point of view get a ugly woman to marry you!

Ancient-Position-696 · 2022-06-15T20:10:11+00:00

Also another great quote For every supermodel, there's a guy tired of her bs

jaysucess1_ · 2022-06-15T22:22:41+00:00

Get more…

rudebwoy100 · 2022-06-15T22:46:07+00:00

The only way is to make yourself so high value that you have a bevy of attractive women to choose from.

oj47dG · 2022-06-15T15:15:30+00:00

Well I guess just treat them as human beings. Or better treat yourself with respect. That way you can put them on an even higher pedestal but since you respect yourself it won't be a problem.

Calamity__Bane · 2022-06-15T17:32:48+00:00

The more time you spend with them, the more you realize they’re just normal people who happen to look good.

yyuyuyu2012 · 2022-06-15T18:50:53+00:00

So when I worked at Wally World I had a manager (Hi Oriana!) who was a bitch and treated me like shit. We were two years apart and she acted like God's gift to man kind. She was cute but her personality was ugly. One time it got so bad I almost felt like telling her off. Looking back I do wonder if there was tension (but I was datinf someone). She treated everyone else nice but me. Either that or I just sucked.

JearBear_3 · 2022-06-15T19:22:26+00:00

Put yourself first ie respect yourself and treat others the way they reciprocate and the rest will follow.

Regards hot chicks, treat the chick like your bratty little sister and have fun with her. In a generous way of course

2022-06-15T21:18:43+00:00

By learning from your own experience and from others that if you are pursuing a romantic relationship for yourself, that personality not looks are what’s most important for that..

GalaxyBrainU · 2022-06-15T21:28:33+00:00

By realizing that they take shits just like the rest of us.

In seriousness though, you gotta ingrain in your mind that they are just human beings. They feel awkwardness, embarrassment, have their own insecurities and none of them are perfect. Once you realize they're just regular human beings, it gets easier. Spending more time around them and interacting with them in situations where you don't expect to date them also helps.

2022-06-15T21:30:59+00:00

Improve your looks and know you can get a girl. It’s a very easy fix. Look matter and you’ll get a girl much easier when you look good

2022-06-15T21:34:51+00:00

Easy, take the off the pedestal.

Openexpress · 2022-06-15T21:36:57+00:00

Just say to yourself every time you meet a hot chick "She's hot but what about her personality?" I find that this works when I'm talking to hot dudes.

burncushlikewood · 2022-06-15T21:44:26+00:00

Hide your sexual interest, dont display any interest and qualify them early

Kidcouger · 2022-06-15T23:58:50+00:00

I've learned that I'm first attracted to a woman by her looks, Then after that it's her personality that makes or breaks the attraction

You could have a 10/10 but if her personality is shit then I lose all attraction, idk why but it's just me

That also helped me stop putting 10/10s on a pedestal

DestinyChitChat · 2022-06-16T00:34:11+00:00

For me it was to remind myself that even hot girls have to sit on a toilet. Gross :P

Professional_Steak23 · 2022-06-16T01:38:22+00:00

Maturing and realizing that they’re just as human as me, with likely the same insecurities

LandscapeClear1630 · 2022-06-16T01:55:31+00:00

Abudance mentality is the only thing that works against this

2022-06-16T03:16:19+00:00

Watch hot girl scat porn, things will become all too clear

Ill_Cherry_8850 · 2022-06-16T03:26:15+00:00

Get a 80hr+ a week job, if not dedicate all available time to jobs that remove all communication/internet and realize you need your shit together before you let a woman run your day to day choices and FINANCES..... Realize you're NOT the Man you should be and work towards obtaining that Title, a title that's always climbing as life moves.

We all need this, some few apply this and it's evident

Delicious_Ad_1853 · 2022-06-16T03:44:37+00:00

"No matter how hot she is, someone somewhere is sick of putting up with her shit."

IOW, you'll eventually see past the appearances and judge her based on her personality, which is going to be a crapshoot, just like it is with anyone else.

basedbhau · 2022-06-16T05:33:24+00:00

Treat them like how you would treat guys. They're human beings too and they don't need to be put on pedestal just because of good genetics.

Few-Management8195 · 2022-06-16T05:53:08+00:00

Its weird. But being a dickhead misanthrope in high school helped a ton. I looked past people's appearances. And saw them as idiots. Which ended up in weird loops. Some of those girls ended up with something to prove. Sometimes they realized that I wasn't acting smarter from nowhere. So, then they would ask me to help with homework. Then you just hang out with these people. Get to know em as people. Sometimes not as dumb as you think they are. Sometimes they were.

In short, I just realized that people were people. Its a weird concept. But it helped my misanthropy, and it helped me from being a simp. And its a lesson that I just keep learning everyday.

2022-06-16T07:44:10+00:00

I dated a hot girl in a LTR, one of the worst relationships ever when I look back at it. For both of us, we were not compatible but forced it (in the beginning me, i begged or acted like a pathetic pushover. Then when I stopped she did the same).

Once I experienced it and ended that relationship, my dumb penis realized it aint shit and i should listen to my brain.

distawest · 2022-06-16T08:03:21+00:00

Start making love to lots of girls who are not that hot ... After a while you' ll get the necessary self-confidence to attack the hot ones

real_mort · 2022-06-16T08:20:27+00:00

Comes with practice :)

2022-06-16T08:52:09+00:00

Realising how people there are and that it’s a numbers game. Remember a high value man is a investment nowadays so if you remember that a rejection just feels like they are blocking their blessings.

Temporary_Pair_5829 · 2022-06-16T09:37:04+00:00

Don't put anyone on a pedestal not just hot women.

We all shit the same unless you have a bag fitted or whatever.

david10277 · 2022-06-17T13:44:20+00:00

Spot on ...

2022-06-17T21:00:40+00:00

Know you can get them and be better than them. Be feared. If you’re better than them it’ll be easy to get them and when you’re feared they wont give you shit. Most guys are scared of them cause they’re hot. Almost all guys are scared of mean hot girls. I’m not but I’m really mean. No one fucks with me. Even big guys don’t fuck with me

hagakurejunkie · 2022-06-18T18:12:05+00:00

You realize you have worth as well and you work each day to increase your self-worth.

2022-06-21T18:46:29+00:00

2 parts: 1. Desensitizing: talking to them and learn that getting rejected is okay 2. Good aids: some good moments will teach u how to do it, and other than that, doing st else that teach you happiness doesn’t need hotness

Then the experience of getting with these girls will be the next step for confidence

Forget all the ‘treat them like’ advice, that’s usually if u already have the confidence and needs a reminder. Try to treat an apple as a banana and u can feel how ur brain scrams and u give a stressful vibe. Ur biology is more honest than ur ‘solution’

TheRiverOfDyx · 2022-07-05T00:00:09+00:00

Hot girls are the NORM. Ugly girls are the outliers. Not the other way around. Put fat and/or uglygirls on pedestals of people you don’t want to be like or your kids to be like.

Title	How do you stop putting hot girls on a pedestal?
Author	derealizedpig
Upvotes	58
Comments	128
Date	June 15, 2022 1:26 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/vcuimk/how_do_you_stop_putting_hot_girls_on_a_pedestal/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-you-stop-putting-hot-girls-on-a-pedestal.1257004 https://theredarchive.com/post/1257004

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