When you get divorced, everyone tells you to move on, but nobody tells you how.

If you broke your leg, you wouldn't try to run a marathon the next day. You would do rehab. Your mind needs the same thing. Here's what actually worked for me:

1. Cut The Numbing: The urge to drink or stay up all night gaming is huge. It feels good while you're doing it, but it’s just borrowing happiness from your future self. You need a clear head to navigate this. If you are numbing out, you aren't processing the loss. You are just delaying it.

2. Six months of zero dating: No apps. No "getting back out there." No casual dates to boost your ego. When you date right after a divorce, you are using women as aspirin. It’s not fair to them, and it stunts your growth. There is real dignity in learning to sit in an empty room without panicking. Learn to be alone before you try to be with someone else.

3. Change your environment: If you are still in the same house, you are living in a museum of your past life. Your brain is triggered by every corner of that house. You need to switch that shit up. Buy some new sheets. Move the couch to the other wall. Paint the bedroom. DO SOMETHING! You need your brain to register that this is a new space, not just a broken version of the old one.

4. Check your circle: You will have your so called friends, who want to get you drunk and bash your ex. Avoid them. They are feeding the anger. Find the friends who ask how you are sleeping, or who drag you to the gym. You need Spotters, not drinking buddies.

5. Get your body right: Your mind is going to be chaotic, so your body needs to be strong and stable. Set a bedtime. Eat real food. Lift weights. It sounds basic, but physical discipline is the only thing that holds the line when your emotions are out of control.

You aren't doing this to "show her" or "win the breakup." You are doing this to find the man you were before the stress buried you. Focus on the process and the results will take care of itself.

Stay strong, Fellas