Hey fellas, digesting a lot of emotions including anger from something which is hard to understand. My ex wife asked for a divorce about 2 months back. Something in which blindsided me greatly for her coldness and treating it like a high school breakup, but I could explain more details another time.

A buddy of mine (groomsman at me/ex wedding) is marrying (bridesmaid at me/ex wedding) in a couple weeks. I received a text message first asking me to not attend their wedding. Not that his soon-to-be-wife requested, but his own precaution she will be stressed on their big day. Something I would not take as a texted update to a good friend. So, I told him to call me right then and there to talk it over where he confirmed it was his idea and not hers to come to this conclusion. Again, this divorce has been very quiet and non-contested while we wait for decree date. Plus, he understands I would not be one to make a scene. Ironically, my soon to be ex is an alcoholic and a messy drinker at times.

Am I wrong for thinking this is a significant lack of judgement on his part? What did y'all experience socially with a friend group and the life events that came soon after a couple of friends divorced? Kind of at a loss for words.