[Q4BP] How do men vet women for possible divorce rape?

Pretty_Please_C_My_V · 2018-06-07T15:51:39+00:00

A woman can ruin a man in divorce court if she wants to. What kind of women want to destroy men in court? How do men avoid them? What are common red flags...

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I may not have been clear in my post. I meant that the more a woman earns as a % of household income, the higher divorce and cheating rates are.

If the woman earns 100k and the man earns 150k, that is fine. If the woman earns 100k and the man earns 10k, that is a problem.

https://www.demogr.mpg.de/papers/workshops/041125_paper07.pdf

When a woman earns 80-100% of household income, the divorce rate is twice as high when a woman earns 0-20% of household income.

Men are 5x more likely to cheat when their wives are the breadwinner and they stay at home.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1303563/House-husbands-times-likely-cheat-wives.html

Well-paid wives beware - men who are financially dependent on their other halves are more likely to be unfaithful, research shows.

And the greater the earning gap, the more likely the man is to cheat, the study suggests.

It found that house husbands whose wives work all day were five times more likely to have an affair than those who contribute an equal amount of money to the partnership.

If you can make that kind of relationship work, more power to you. But being honest, taking on roles in a relationship that contradict both biological and cultural gender roles is not easy.

Both parties need to be very self aware and mature to make something like this work.

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Because men think that, if they are the breadwinner, then anything they earn or buy during the marriage is still somehow their own personal, private property, and not the property of the marriage. "My wife has been a SAHM for the past ten years; she hasn't earned anything!"

There is a merp who actually gave a pretty good precis of this. If you have been married for 20 years, and your wife has been a SAHM for fifteen of those years, the court is going to assume (not unreasonably) that you were okay with that and located enough value in your wife's SAHM contributions that she should be considered a full and equal partner now that the marriage is dissolving. If an individual man is not okay with that, and bridles at the idea that the court will consider a SAHM a full and equal partner, then he needs to divorce his wife as soon as possible, before there is an established history of her not working. Then he will be free to amass earnings and possessions that belong solely to him, and not to the marriage.

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What you say is true.

The sticking point is in some states like California, 10 good years of raising kids together allows the courts to interfere indefinitely. https://www.divorcenet.com/states/california/ca_art33 Certain east coast states seem to have similar worst case outcomes in the law books. I have no idea how often it occurs though. While lifetime alimony isn't a guarantee, after 10 years it is a possibility.

Given that most productive people live in these states, some hysteria is founded in reality. Cali though seems to be the worst. England worse than Cali, and other western areas taper off quite a bit.

That's the 'hard divorce-rape' case. Most other 'divorce-rape's are more in line with yours, but a good amount seem to fall into court biased causes. There's documentation of some of this, but by it's nature good data on this is hard to find. It seems to fall into a category where the woman can make the man's life hard if she chooses to, but doesn't have to. Using domestic violence laws, for example.

Hence, Red Pill anecdotes are taken as a worst case scenario you want to avoid. Even though the reality might be something like 0.001 percent outcome, is there anything to gain by risking marriage?

This is counterbalanced by women's demand for marriage if kids are going to be involved. The whole thing is fascinating.

TLDR; The worst case examples exist, and it is worth knowing how to avoid them. Simple plan is don't get married. If you must get married, know the law. Also know the rules can change at any time, after the marriage takes place.

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Marriage is about more than financial input though

You're absolutely correct, however I'm directly responding to this statement:

JFC, everyone loses in a divorce. Women aren't gaining anything financially,

So, in this instance we are strictly talking about financial gain as is the topic that you brought up. The women in this comment string were circle fapping each other when basic math and common scenarios (men being breadwinners) completely disproves your statement. The court doesn't split up based on contribution, this is why when things are split 50/50 it actually isn't equal. Yet, because a marriage license is a business contract, technically speaking they are split up equally, therefore people believe it is split equally when it actually isn't.

He was only able to get the promotion that earned 100k because she was the one picking the kids up from school, because she was packing his lunches so he didn't have to leave the office

This is possible sure, but then why can't men use the same argument for child custody? "Well she was a SAHM and she did take care of the kids, but the diapers she bought, the car that she drives, the food she feeds the kids all came from my paycheck, therefore judge I deserve an equal amount of time with my children". We know by statistics that this isn't the case. Especially when there are things like child support, so a man can be replaced and only be used as a wage slave.

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Yes I understand the issue with just looking at how much each partner is making. Obviously since women make less than men they will naturally continue that post-divorce at least for some time. But the census data I gave you didn't just look at that, it included poverty rates and rates of seeking state benefits. You are essentially assuming that this "net worth" confounder makes all these statistics entirely moot and worthless. It makes them at least subject to criticism, all things considered, it does not tend to prove men fair worse in a divorce. You're making several assumptions here you haven't shown. I.e., that her net worth is somehow very substantial post-divorce compared to his, and that is what skews the data.

However, there's a strong chance she took ownership of the house, car, his retirement accounts while he is earning more income in his position. She is probably also getting paid "vaginamony" which may not be considered in this study about whom earns more income after the fact. Meanwhile, the man lives in a studio apartment with zero equities simply paying his income at his ex-wife.

This is just wrong. You don't "get the house and retirement accounts and his car" in a divorce, you get your equitable or community property share. In community property states (I believe there are 9 of these), it's pretty much 50/50 marital property. In equitable property, it can lean towards 40/60 and outliers can lean more than that but normally it's still average close to 50/50 marital property. If there's a house that she "gets" it means his share of the equity in the house is offset somewhere else.

[–]AryaBarzanProud Fat/Slut Shamer0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link

Obviously since women ~~make~~ earn less than men they will naturally continue that post-divorce at least for some time.

Sorry, had to fix your error before I continued here.

All studies can be "moot and pointless" if they have a strong bias such as the study that was initially linked to me by poppy_blu. The "assumption" I made was a very common scenario in a divorce and I was simply showing how easy it is to contort a study to show bias. As for your points regarding poverty rates and rates of seeking state benefits, those can also be done with a low income but a relatively higher net worth. I think it's fairly obvious to most people that men do far worst financially in divorces. And by this I mean, they are working more hours for far less usable income. I'm not very sympathetic to a "poor" woman whom is earning less than her husband after a divorce while attaining his assets she never actually worked for in the first place.

This is just wrong. You don't "get the house and retirement accounts and his car" in a divorce, you get your equitable or community property share.

Yes and no. In the situation I provided, the woman was a SAHM, which means that she isn't earning any of this. Due to feminist-created laws stating that the mother was "accustomed to a certain lifestyle", she will be given much more than the man whom has actually earned all of these with his hard work. Since she isn't earning anything, her share will have to be "offset" with his hard work and effort. Feminist American courts often view it as "the man has a revenue source whereas she doesn't because she 'sacrificed her career for her children', so these equities will be better suited for her". Either way, she will not necessarily receive his entire retirement account/house/car/etc, but can very well receive a huge portion of it that the man is actively working and contributing for. When in reality, all she really did earn is a day-care workers salary for caring for her own children.

[–]sublimemongrelBecky, Esq.0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link

Sorry, had to fix your error before I continued

I meant the same fucking thing.

if they have a strong bias such as the study that was initially linked to me by poppy_blu.

I gave you a report based upon census data.

The "assumption" I made was a very common scenario in a divorce

Yes that is the assumption. It is NOT, however a correct one. Frankly I do not think you understand how divorce law works.

And by this I mean, they are working more hours for far less income.

I do not understand what this has to do with a divorce.

Yes and no.

No, it's just no.

In the situation I provided, the woman was a SAHM, which means that she isn't earning any of this.

You did not include that in your initial context at all. Even then you're wrong.

Due to feminist-created laws

Feminists did not create most modern divorce law. Please link me to this.

Feminist American courts

Just no.

Either way, she will not necessarily receive his entire retirement account/house/car/etc,

Correct, except it's not just "not necessarily' it's "pretty much never".

but can very well receive a huge portion of it that the man is actively working and contributing for.

In some cases, correct. But not typically vastly more than what he gets. Not typically more net worth.

When in reality, all she really did earn is a day-care workers salary for caring for her own children.

That is not how the law sees marriage. Also, married people don't tend to see marriage like that either, thankfully.

[–]AryaBarzanProud Fat/Slut Shamer0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link

I meant the same fucking thing.

Earn and simply "make" are very different things. I'm not sure if English is your first language, but it's very obvious to most people which is why feminists use the word "make" instead of "earn" in this regard.

Yes that is the assumption. It is NOT, however a correct one.

How can a common scenario I presented be incorrect? Are you denying that SAHM divorcing their breadwinner husbands is incorrect?

I do not understand what this has to do with a divorce.

It has to do with what I consider to be financial compensation. Which is relevant to divorce and how what is considered "poverty" would affect an individual. An unemployed person in "poverty" is not the same as an employed person in the same poverty in my book.

Feminists did not create most modern divorce law.

"Modern" divorce laws are almost all created by feminists. "No fault divorce" wasn't created by feminists? VAWA wasn't created by feminists? Whom created this horrible female-centric divorce system, then? Is it that evil imaginary "patriarchy" you feminists are always rambling about?

Correct, except it's not just "not necessarily' it's "pretty much never".

Happens fairly often, my dear. Why do you think you always hear about "men being taken to the cleaners" by their wives and never the reverse?

That is not how the law sees marriage. Also, married people don't tend to see marriage like that either, thankfully.

Precisely and I am saying that the law should. "Raising her own children" on a man's dime is literally just babysitting and should be paid as such. Many married people (and non-married people alike!) certainly view the wife raising children as.... raising children. I'm not sure why you believe women should be so heavily compensated for doing something as simple and basic as raising their own children.

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[–]AryaBarzanProud Fat/Slut Shamer1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (14 children) | Copy Link

From reading your post history and how you've responded to me with just another study essentially repeating itself, I'm going to safely assume that economic/financial knowledge is not your strongest skillset. Let's take a look at this study and explain to you in layman's terms what is meant by "parameters for how this study was conducted". I'm going to highlight the important words here to make it even easier for you to comprehend.

The study you linked is simply showing that men's income is higher after a divorce, not that men have a higher net worth than woman after a divorce on average. For example, let's say a SAHM divorces her husband. He works a corporate position so he most likely gets his 3% (generally just an increase adjusted for inflation) pay increase each year. Since she is no longer married to her husband (the breadwinner), she is now not making any income (this means she makes less than she technically used to since she had an "income" from her marriage). However, there's a strong chance she took ownership of the house, car, his retirement accounts while he is earning more income in his position. She is probably also getting paid "vaginamony" which may not be considered in this study about whom earns more income after the fact. Meanwhile, the man lives in a studio apartment with zero equities simply paying his income at his ex-wife.

Do you not see how this could contort the results of these studies you keep posting? The scenario I provided is extremely common and can show how this study is incredibly flawed. Even though the woman clearly has an easier time with her finances and came out better with all of the equities in her favor, the man is looked upon as the "winner" in this situation. When that is clearly not the case. Do you now see why the exact parameters of any study are important and you cannot just simply quote studies like this to prove some sort of point? It's the same reason this study didn't go into detail into which gender works more hours after a divorce.

Now, since you're so certain that women somehow lose more of their net worth after a divorce, please answer my earlier question to you about why everybody always mentions that a "man was taken to the cleaners" instead of the using the opposite sex? Surely, there would be more talk about these "poor female divorcees" from the general public and not about them living off their hard-working husbands wealth? Or are you and your falsified studies so much more intelligent than everybody else? ;)

[–]poppy_bluAARP sent me a birthday card0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago* (13 children) | Copy Link

[–]AryaBarzanProud Fat/Slut Shamer0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (12 children) | Copy Link

My point is that the your "study" doesn't prove much since the data can be severely skewed to represent a bias, which it does.

What the data actually proves is 1) men earn far more than women

Of course, men earn more than women. Men have always earned more than women because men work more hours, take less vacation days, work more difficult/dangerous jobs, are willing to commute longer to work, etc. Has nothing to do with your study and definitely doesn't show some sort of imaginary injustice against women.

2) women are still worse off than men after a divorce.

I literally just explained how it doesnt... Come on... I know you aren't this dense.

perhaps the reason they get the house is because they earn significantly less (community property, look it up).

If they earn less, then how does that entitle them to more of somebody whom earns mores salary? Let me guess.... you're a communist? At the very least, very fiscally liberal.

Oh and maybe also because they’re the ones raising the kids. Forgot about that one huh?

Kinda blows your “vagimony” —LMFAO — theory out of the water.

Not really. Raising children is fine, but that doesn't amount to the same compensation as working a difficult corporate job. I believe that should be the compensation of an average babysitter, since essentially that is what "raising children" is.

Are you sure you should be insulting my intelligence?

Your knowledge of basic finance and how variables in a study work is severely lacking. Aside from that, not really since I don't know you very well.

Got anything else, brah? Besides MRA talking points and snark.

Sure.

[–]poppy_bluAARP sent me a birthday card0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago* (11 children) | Copy Link

Yep. just keep hurling the insults while NOT showing any data that backs up your claim that women are walking away with the lions share of assets after a divorce, despite the fact that community property or equitable/fair division exists in nearly every state. Your beliefs are not data. Your MRAs talking points are not data.

Really. I’ll wait. I’ll even look at your data with an open mind. Let’s see it.

PS did some calculations based on your idea that the custodial mother should receive what a babysitter does.

Where i live, the average hourly rate for a babysitter is $15, according to care.com.

Let say the mother doesnt work and has responsibility for the child 24/7. Dad has custody on the weekend and say the kids spend vacations with him (about 2 months).

That’s $79k a year. If the mother works or the kids are in school all day, it’s still $53k.

LMAO

[–]AryaBarzanProud Fat/Slut Shamer0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link

I'm not saying that there is an overwhelming data that men are screwed in divorces nor do I really feel like doing so much research to present a fairly obvious point the majority of society already knows (aka. why "men are taken to the cleaners" and not women) given all of the different angles one would have to consider in an actual research on this. I'm also not going to research that the "sky is blue" when it's fairly obvious to everyone around me that it is. What I'm showing is that the conclusion you're presenting with your data is false and that data for this sort of thing is difficult to possess.

Your beliefs are not data.

You should really tell your feminist friends this. They're probably the largest perpetrators of this. Either way, data itself isn't a conclusion to anything. Data is just... data. Data provided appropriately and account for all parameters can be made into a conclusion.

PS did some calculations based on your idea that the custodial mother should receive what a babysitter does.

Oh, no. I can't wait to see the math errors here...

Let say the mother doesnt work and has responsibility for the child 24/7. Dad has custody on the weekend and say the kids spend vacations with him (about 2 months).

Dear... come on. Nobody works "24/7". People need to sleep and you're not paid while you sleep, so your arithmetic is already severely lacking and overcompensating. She should be paid $15 per hour for 8 hours of work because she would have to do her own duties outside of work like everybody else (if that is child-rearing, washing her own dishes, etc). Her actual annual salary (pre-tax) would be $31,320 pre-tax, which sounds accurate. Pretty much no babysitter is paid $79k.

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Title	[Q4BP] How do men vet women for possible divorce rape?
Author	Pretty_Please_C_My_V
Upvotes	3
Comments	206
Date	June 7, 2018 3:51 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/8pbef6/q4bp_how_do_men_vet_women_for_possible_divorce/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/q4bp-how-do-men-vet-women-for-possible-divorce.262036 https://theredarchive.com/post/262036

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