664,807 posts

Fiancee threw a butter knife at me

by The_Meissner_Effect | February 04, 2020 | askMRP

21 upvotes

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Last night, we were eating a snack together, and the topic of her weight came up. (She was on her period FYI)

She gained some weight last year, and made a comment towards the end of summer that she doesn't feel as confident in a bikini as she once did. She's not fat, but it's noticeable from when we first started seeing each other. She said at that point that she would buckle down this past fall and hit the gym as she used to. Obviously, that never happened. I played it cool and kept going to the gym on my own.

The wedding is supposed to be in June. She made similar comments to the above after New Year's Eve. This time, I have been pushing her more to the gym and in the gym, in the name of support. Last night, she was trying to say that she weighs (and looks) the same as she did five years ago. I was agreeing in a sarcastic way and she was laughing at first, but slowly my language morphed to the literal/logical as I tried to explain (huge mistake) that she does not and that she shouldn't lie to herself if she intends to commit to making a change.

She apparently took serious offense to this and threw the butter knife that she was using for the peanut butter at me square in the chest. She went to bed. No other physical escalation, no yelling or anything.

This morning, I went to the gym, and when I got back and we were both getting ready, she is half sobbing about how I am pushing her too hard, and she is going to break. (She went to the gym twice last week - Tuesday and Saturday) This might be more related to her 1 hour commute each way to her new job - although this is supposed to be temporary up to May/June.

She has yet to apologize for the disrespect. I told her I was sorry for offending her but not for telling the truth before she went to bed. She refused my peace offering of reading her a bedtime story (women = children), which she usually enjoys.

Should I end this relationship?


Post Information
Title Fiancee threw a butter knife at me
Author The_Meissner_Effect
Upvotes 21
Comments 108
Date 04 February 2020 06:14 PM UTC (5 months ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/329500
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/eyua40/fiancee_threw_a_butter_knife_at_me/
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Comments

[–]FereallyRedHard Core Red75 points76 points  (7 children) | Copy

Ex-fiancee got fat and disrespectful. So glad I didn't put another ring on that. Wonder where she is now?

[–]bsutansaltTRP Founding Father29 points30 points  (0 children) | Copy

Ex-fiancee got fat and disrespectful and demonstrated she's prone to domestic violence. So glad I didn't put another ring on that. Wonder where she is now?

FTFY

[–]The_Meissner_Effect[S] 2 points3 points  (5 children) | Copy

What happened in your case? Was it a specific instance of disrespect, slow loss of respect, or a mixed bag?

[–]FereallyRedHard Core Red50 points51 points  (3 children) | Copy

NoNo.... That's what YOU should be saying in a month.

If she's already behaving poorly, do you have any illusions that marrying her will make it any better?

Read the sidebar here. Put a hold on the wedding. Wake up.

[–]An_Actual_Politician28 points29 points  (0 children) | Copy

"Yeah ok she was physically violent to me when we were dating, but surely things will drastically improve as soon as I sign over half of my current and future financial assets to her!"

Where the fuck is your abundance, OP. Would you start a business with someone who just assaulted you? Then why are you going to enter into a far more restrictive and binding financial relationship with someone like that.

[–]The_Meissner_Effect[S] 9 points10 points  (1 child) | Copy

I understand your comment now. No, the blue pill illusion is now gone. Thank you.

[–]InChargeManRed Beret22 points23 points  (0 children) | Copy

See you in about 3 years after you marry her and shit goes to hell.

[–]mrpthrowa8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

God you’re so dense

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red70 points71 points  (3 children) | Copy

Move up the wedding. She is a keeper.

[–]SocialCupcake10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

And get her preggo, OPs kids will appreciate his choice for their mom when they get put in foster care.

[–]WhatUPbRUTSKI6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks for that comment. Makes me laugh

[–]JoeBuckYourslf3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

This shit is blowing my mind.

[–]creating_my_life43 points44 points  (13 children) | Copy

Should I end this relationship?

Yes. Immediately.

Don't wait until she throws a steak knife at one of your children.

You've been given the gift of a pre-wedding reddist of red flags. Honor it.

The fact that you're even asking this question shows you do not respect yourself, your health (mental and physical), your time, and your life enough to consider getting married. I firmly believe that no man should even entertain the idea of getting married until his late 30s or 40s; and then after entertaining the idea he should realize marriage is a shit deal for men today.

Call the wedding off. An act of abuse is enough to blow the whole thing up and walk away. Your friends and family will want to know what happened. The wider story is, "I decided against this." (Note: Not "we", but "I", own it. man up.) The story to your close friends and family is, "She physically assaulted me, and although I wasn't hurt I felt it was an aspect of the situation I am not comfortable with."

You know what you need to do.

[–]The_Meissner_Effect[S] 30 points31 points  (5 children) | Copy

Yes. I already have an exit plan to pack up all my shit and move out before the end of the week. My dad says I can live with him indefinitely. The house is in her name - I have no debt obligations with her.

[–]so_woke_da_wookie39 points40 points  (0 children) | Copy

You’re sorted. You’re Dad’s cool. GO.

[–]Herointraining6925 points26 points  (0 children) | Copy

GTFO

Be grateful she couldn't hold her shit together until the contract was signed.

[–]ThaiEscapePlan23 points24 points  (0 children) | Copy

Forget about the butter knife. The fact that she pulled the fat grenade well before the wedding shows that she has no respect for you.

As for her apologizing for the disrespect, it will come when she thinks her beta bucks is bailing.

[–]hack3geRed Beret5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Faggots get this behavior - it has little to do with the woman in most cases. Women take the shape of their container and in this case OP is a giant pussy so it’s not unexpected.

My wife threw a lamp at my head and threatened to kill me during my journey because I was a giant faggot and she only saw me as a beta bitch our entire relationship.

There’s a great post by Rian Stone on his blog about “What did you expect she would do” - I’m on mobile so can’t grab the link.

Realize she’s not on your team and doesn’t even know what she wants - granted women exist on a spectrum so some go farther than other into crazy town. My wife went farther than most her and yet she’s now the sweetest, caring woman now with me.

[–]jakethesnake500037 points38 points  (7 children) | Copy

If she is already gaining weight, and puts in minimal effort to lose weight before “HER big day”, then what makes you think she’s not going to balloon into a land whale in a few years?

[–]FoxShitNasty8323 points24 points  (6 children) | Copy

In her mind she's already married this pussy and is fattening up to be a stay at home mom. Her own Billy beta on premise to beat with a pointy stick and take half his shit if he dares get our of line.

Fuck that

[–]jakethesnake500011 points12 points  (5 children) | Copy

Marriage really is a bad deal for men.

[–]so_woke_da_wookie2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

I think there’s something we need to think about here. ‘Marriage is a bad deal for men’, ‘MRP is RP on Hardmode’, ‘The Decline of Western Civ’. Sometimes, I believe that. Other times i wonder if we are giving away our power. Here’s what I mean: don’t they seem like the frames set by an oppressor. ‘Resistance is futile’, do you know what I mean?

We talk about hypergamy a lot? Sometimes, I wonder should we talk about hegemony just as much.

[–]Chump_No_More3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

No. Rule Zero or GTFO.

[–]so_woke_da_wookie1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Dead right.

[–]nordicpolarbear3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

Our power was already given away to the state. She can call the cops on you, divorce rape you, keep your children from you and you have zero say so in changing that. There is no ownership to be taken in that realm. Would you put up your full net worth in a business that you have zero control over?

[–]so_woke_da_wookie-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Depends on my starting net worth.

[–]Blue_Andre26 points27 points  (2 children) | Copy

(She was on her period FYI)

Stop making excuses

She has yet to apologize for the disrespect. I told her I was sorry for offending her

uwotm8?

[–]The_Meissner_Effect[S] 6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

Yeah, I fucked up, lost frame. My frame started giving way once we moved in together after the engagement it seems. Although sex hasn't declined or anything.

[–]Smuggler-Tuek22 points23 points  (1 child) | Copy

At least it stopped the peanut butter intake for the moment lol. See if you can get her throw everything but salads at you.

[–]wkndatbernardus6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

OP needs to offend her constantly so she doesn't have time to stuff her pie hole.

[–]HeckleandChide14 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy

WWJDD?

What Would Johnny Depp Do? I ask that because one of the richest, well-liked, and most influential men in America was ruined by a woman’s lies. There is incontrovertible proof that Amber Heard was the abuser in the relationship and yet his career is basically done, he is roasted in the public square, and she is running around playing Aquaman’s squeeze and speaking at women’s rallies / marches. This world doesn’t give a fuck about the truth and instead chases what feels good. You will lose in the court system, society, etc. if you go up against a crazy bitch. And she is clearly a crazy bitch.

Also, people tend to get worse over time because people tend to suck. Fat women get fatter, etc. If she has something as socially demanding as a wedding coming up when everyone will be judging her on her weight and she still isn’t motivated, then she is going to turn into a land whale after a couple of kids. That’s damn near a given, unless of course you get one of the lucky ones that gets fat for a few years and then gets fit to boink the trainer at the local gym.

The corollary to that is if she throws a butter knife now, get ready for a steak knife to the balls later. I’m not kidding.

Move on asap.

[–]SoggyTrainCucked by machines9 points10 points  (2 children) | Copy

Lol, the irony of his fat girlfriend using an eating utensil as a weapon. That's funny right there.

There is only one solution for this problem. Get rid of all of your silverware. She can't use them as weapons and maybe she will lose weight.

[–]RicoDunne0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yep, plastic knifes don't have the same range, so he can just keep apologizing to her at a safe distance.

[–]Tyred_Biggums17 points18 points  (2 children) | Copy

What are your stats?

Obviously, that never happened. I played it cool and kept going to the gym on my own.

She doesn't feel like you're worth working out for

but slowly my language morphed to the literal/logical as I tried to explain

Clearly you've read nothing

She apparently took serious offense to this and threw the butter knife that she was using for the peanut butter at me square in the chest. She went to bed. No other physical escalation, no yelling or anything.

Oh no, are you ok? Call the DV hotline at once. How did you not just start laughing at the absurdity of this? That's FUNNY shit.

she is half sobbing about how I am pushing her too hard, and she is going to break

Stop pushing her... be a man she wants to go to the gym for.

This might be more related to her 1 hour commute each way to her new job - although this is supposed to be temporary up to May/June.

Get out of her head and what her motivations are.

She has yet to apologize for the disrespect. I told her I was sorry for offending her but not for telling the truth before she went to bed.

You're a dumbass

She refused my peace offering of reading her a bedtime story (women = children), which she usually enjoys.

There once was a shitty man

Who had a fat fiance

She threw a knife during a fight

Because he was secretly gay

Should I end this relationship?

Lift, sidebar, STFU... and don't get married.

Edit: Faggot

[–]The_Meissner_Effect[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Noted. Thank you for the honesty.

[–]HighTesticles0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

There once was a shitty man

Who had a fat fiance

She threw a knife during a fight

Because he was secretly gay

Bravo

[–]SBIIIRed Fucking Commando7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

She threw a butter knife covered with peanut butter at you?

Jesus Christ.

What a waste of peanut butter.

[–]part_wolf12 points13 points  (5 children) | Copy

Let me see if I can operate the hamsterator properly:

Last night, we were eating a snack together, and the topic of her weight came up.

I didn't see an obvious comfort test coming a mile away.

She gained some weight last year..

She's getting fat.

She's not fat.

Okay, she is fat.

She said at that point that she would buckle down this past fall and hit the gym as she used to.

I've been paying too much attention to her words.

Obviously, that never happened. I played it cool and kept going to the gym on my own.

I have tacitly endorsed my fiance putting in zero effort.

The wedding is supposed to be in June.

I'm a moron.

I have been pushing her more to the gym and in the gym, in the name of support.

I've been resenting her and criticizing her for not meeting my unexpressed desires.

Last night, she was trying to say that she weighs (and looks) the same as she did five years ago. I was agreeing in a sarcastic way and she was laughing at first, but slowly my language morphed to the literal/logical as I tried to explain (huge mistake) that she does not and that she shouldn't lie to herself if she intends to commit to making a change.

I went full retard on a simple comfort test and missed a teachable moment.

She apparently took serious offense to this and threw the butter knife that she was using for the peanut butter at me square in the chest. She went to bed. No other physical escalation, no yelling or anything.

I have no boundaries and am currently accepting physical attacks.

This morning, I went to the gym

I'd rather lift weights and stick my head in the sand than confront my problems.

when I got back and we were both getting ready, she is half sobbing about how I am pushing her too hard, and she is going to break.

I'm providing her zero comfort, I have no mission, and I'm not sharing what I want and need in my relationship.

(She went to the gym twice last week - Tuesday and Saturday) This might be more related to her 1 hour commute each way to her new job - although this is supposed to be temporary up to May/June.

I'm rationalizing her laziness.

She has yet to apologize for the disrespect.

I don't have the balls to enforce my boundaries or tell her that I want an apology.

I told her I was sorry for offending her

I'm a massive pussy.

but not for telling the truth before she went to bed.

I completely DEERed and made the comfort test failure even worse.

She refused my peace offering of reading her a bedtime story (women = children), which she usually enjoys.

I'm actually engaged to an eleven year old.

Should I end this relationship?

I'm not capable of making my own decisions.

[–]Cloudy_Pirate6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Let me see if I can operate the hamsterator properly:

I’d say you nailed it.

[–]The_Meissner_Effect[S] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

I did tell her that I expected an apology. She just won't give one.

How could I have handled this comfort test better?

[–]part_wolf7 points8 points  (2 children) | Copy

This is a basic question.

“I’m less attracted to you.”

Or, “I don’t want you to feel bad about yourself. Do you want my help with getting fit?”

Or, maybe just shut the fuck up.

She’s being lazy, which is almost certainly reflective of your poor leadership. You don’t have to make it your problem to fix, but you can’t get mad at her. You’ve tolerated her laziness and you’re still giving her your time and attention despite her getting fatter. In fact, you directly endorsed and rewarded her weight gain with a fucking engagement ring.

As for the knife throw, you already blew it. I would’ve said “if that ever happens again, we’re done” and I would’ve been dead serious.

You’re doing it wrong.

[–]The_Meissner_Effect[S] 5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

Fuck man, thanks for the insight. 2020 will be the year I dodged a bullet.

[–]part_wolf5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

I certainly hope so, for your sake. If you don’t fix your shit, you’re bound to end up right back in the same place.

[–]so_woke_da_wookie11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy

Next.

[–]matrixtospartanatLVRed Beret13 points14 points  (1 child) | Copy

>>Last night, we were eating a snack together, and the topic of her weight came up. (She was on her period FYI)

Making excuses for her behavior is always wrong. Let's see in your post how this plays out for you.

>>She gained some weight last year, and made a comment towards the end of summer that she doesn't feel as confident in a bikini as she once did.

She was looking for comfort and leadership. I don't get the sense that you have given her much of either, but I could be wrong...

>>She said at that point that she would buckle down this past fall and hit the gym as she used to. Obviously, that never happened.

Unfuckingbelievable, a woman's actions not matching her words? I read about that happening once in a book on the history of women written in the 1950's. It referenced a woman who did this very thing in Oklahoma around the turn of the century. Shocker this happened to you.

>>The wedding is supposed to be in June.

Wait, what? Do you mean YOUR wedding, to HER? I can't even comment on that right now...it'll spoil the surprise.

>>She apparently took serious offense to this and threw the butter knife that she was using for the peanut butter at me square in the chest.

To put this in perspective, if you had done the same thing to her, you'd be in jail right now. In my state, the victim of domestic abuse cannot 'drop the charges' once the state has filed them as a result of the crime being reported. You will be investigated, charged, tried, sentenced, and incarcerated. Just for perspective on the seriousness of what she did.

>>She went to bed. No other physical escalation, no yelling or anything.

Well, thank God she didn't compound the felony she committed against you with yelling or anything else. And thank God she just went to bed. Because if you had to defend yourself and the police got involved, all she had to say was she was defending herself and you'd be in jail right now, afraid to use the shower.

>>She has yet to apologize for the disrespect. I told her I was sorry for offending her but not for telling the truth before she went to bed.

Alright!! My MAN!!! Way to stand up for yourself!! If you ever leave her, she will be alpha-widowed and ruined for life with every man she is with after you. Mods, could you add this post to the sidebar?

>>Should I end this relationship?

That's a rhetorical question, right? I mean, this is a joke, which is why I laced my response with so much sarcasm. This is the kind of shit one of the mods would post just to see what kind of comments this shit would get.

On the off, 1% chance that you are sincere about this, then the answer is...

YES. YOU SHOULD END THIS RELATIONSHIP!!

You are in a toxic, destructive relationship that WILL result in you being injured on YOUR way to jail, or possibly murdered in your own bed.

To put a finer point on it, IF you stay in this relationship, KNOWING what you now know, YOU WILL DESERVE EVERY FUCKED UP THING THAT SHE DOES TO YOU FROM THIS MOMENT FORWARD.

Terminate the relationship and the impending nuptials with extreme prejudice, RIGHT FUCKING NOW.

No whining, just get it done.

And NEVER come here with this kind of shit again.

You will find your balls and a better future with women in the sidebar.>>>>>>>>>>

Now, STFU, stop typing, start reading, terminate this relationship and..

GET TO FUCKING WORK.

[–]so_woke_da_wookie1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

This^

[–]ImNotSlash6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

[–]The_Meissner_Effect[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Lol fucking kurt russell man. Needed a laugh.

[–]teaandtalk4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

What a great gift she has given you: she has shown her real self before the wedding. Take the red flag for what it is and get out of there.

[–]fannyfire7 points8 points  (13 children) | Copy

You read your wife a bed time story.

What the actual fuck.

[–]part_wolf24 points25 points  (8 children) | Copy

Hickory dickory dock.

My fiancé won’t touch my cock.

She brandished a knife,

I feared for my life.

Yet, all of this comes as a shock.

[–]FoxShitNasty830 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Hahaha lol

[–]The_Meissner_Effect[S] -3 points-2 points  (6 children) | Copy

I came in her mouth an hour before this happened. Sex life has not declined since the engagement.

[–]part_wolf8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

And the bitch was still hungry?

[–]go-RED-go6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Hot sex is part of any women audition for the wife role. You're not special. After you get married and she gets the role, observe how your sex life exponentionally falls down as her weight goes up.

[–]FoxShitNasty835 points6 points  (3 children) | Copy

cum in her mouth = get stabbed

It's not worth it. Don't stick your dick in crazy. Have some self respect and tell her to get the fuck out.

[–]The_Meissner_Effect[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

It's her place. Almost packed and ready to go. Thank you.

[–]Yurcak1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Cum in her mouth everyday til the wedding deposits aren't refundable.

[–]IWantToHelpSometimes0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

If you want, do update up on her behaviour after you have left.

[–]Tyred_Biggums5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is the BEST part.

Normal askMRP post we see 100x... then BOOM - I read her bedtime stories. Can't say I've seen that one before.

[–]FoxShitNasty833 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

I missed that...

Time for some AM

Once upon a time there was a little girl who was awfully horrid (gasp).....

... Turned into a land whale.... Ate pigs.... chad was not impressed.... Got thin, was less cunty and lived happily ever after.

[–]Smuggler-Tuek0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I missed that part. Jesus Christ.

[–]The_Meissner_Effect[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I didn't though. I have in the past. She enjoys kids movies and shit cause her job is working with people with psychological issues. So she doesn't want to watch the latest drama.

[–]-Acta-Non-Verba-2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

She (or anyone else) can't out-exercise the way she eats. Going to the gym is great, but what she needs is fork control.

[–]arm_candy3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Why the fuck are you engaged to this chick? You’ve been with her six months or less. And you have a wedding date less than six months away.

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?

[–]MassiveLeftistCucked by Machines 2.02 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

My commute is 1.5 hrs 1 way.

I dont eat lunch, and workout instead.

[–]alecesne4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

So as a guy with a scar from where my wife threw a knife, I’m telling you to be careful. This is your Fiancee, and she will be like this even after the marriage. And you’ll have no leverage or ability to walk away. Today it’s your choice

[–]CaptainKidd962 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'm not married/in an ltr but damn i feel the need to reply to this one. Throwing things at you is a HUGRE red flag in my opinion.

If you marry her things will only get worse and she'll become a fat fuck for sure. You guys are not even married yet and she's let herself go and she's showing how crazy she is. Dump her.

[–]tap09885342 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Flee. Now. And start working on yourself. Pre-wedding disrespect is deal breaking red flag. Pre-wedding assault is worse than if she fucked your Dad and sent you the video. Women openly admit to fucking for other reasons than attraction. This usually boils down to pair bonding and soothing your ego until commitment is achieved. After this there is no reason to fuck. She already holds you in contempt. Pull the ejector.

[–]SepeanRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'm not going to repeat what others have said already, but I will add this:

Why the fuck are you telling her to go to the gym to lose weight?

You lose weight by burning more calories than you ingest. Going to the gym burns very few calories, much too few to generate an even remotely relevant caloric deficit - and most extra calories burnt are nullified by an increased appetite.

You NEED to eat less than you want to lose weight. Period. Count calories, weigh yourself daily, reduce how many calories you take in until you are at the desired weight loss per week, re adjust as needed. Get enough protein, that can be a problem on a cut and proteins give good satiety. Some find keto, intermittent fasting, high fiber/high HI foods, etc. to help with satiety - but they all work on the basis of putting you in a caloric deficit.

That's what she needs to know and do to lose weight, not "go to the gym". It takes somewhere between a long time and forever to lose weight if you don't change how much you eat.

[–]Onein1024th1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

OP take a step back and decide if this is the kind of life you want for yourself

Whatever excuses you make for her; there's always going to be something going on in your lives that won't be perfect; that's life.

You're right though; her outburst was a reflection of you goin all literal on her

[–]xX_bullitt_Xx1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Maybe you can ask her to give you another pedicure while you read her a bedtime story. Pathetic.

[–]go-RED-go1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You cannot talk a woman into going to the gym.

However, woman will do everything to keep a high value man with options. For him, woman will always want to look her best in any way she can, so she can compete with endless younger pussy that's easy at his reach.

So you just ruthlessly work on yourself and either she keeps up with your looks or some other chick gladly takes her place. It's a win-win situation for you.

Yeah, and do not get married. That's rarely a win-win scenario these days.

[–]Vegasman200021 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

100% yes. Do you really need to ask?

[–]echo9791 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Fuck! Dude! Just read the title. Stop. Get the fuck out!

[–]Livecrazyjoe1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

She gained weight before the wedding. Imagine what will happen afterwards.

Why did you apologize? It's not your fault she's fatter. If she didn't say sorry tell her she's gone the next time she disrespects.

[–]YourWife-MySlut1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Ok. You’ve already got the knee-jerk reactions. Probably unhelpful, but whatever. Look, I’m a bull and have seen all stages of marriage. Early, stale, old (those are the phases).

What these guys are missing is this: are you actually LEADING???

Why are you the only one going to the gym? How much have you coaxed her? These are important questions. Women follow strong men and if she’s not going that reflects on YOU.

If you’ve coaxed her delicately but firmly (she’s a woman, they can’t handle directness), and she is still refusing you need to do one of two things. Look inside yourself and ask if there’s anything else you can do that a confident man can do. Mold your own life. Then, if she’s reticent still it may be time to cut ties. But if it’s that time, then this won’t be new. If this is new then go back and reflect harder.

These idiots here claim women are like children (they are) and in the same breath advocate cutting them off because of a sneeze. Is she a child you need to send to boot camp because life is too much or is she just embarrassed and too immature to handle it right?

There is no “answer” in my comment. But what do you think? Give it a moment. Never prostrate yourself. Don’t accept bullshit ever. But how have you been leading? Is the horse already at water? Or is the horse still walking in circles?

[–]aita28991 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Run. The throwing things will turn into more items until one day she says” I felt threatened.” Then it all goes down hill because you stood up for yourself.

[–]RolloAngerManagement1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Why the fuck are you engaged to this girl and planning to get married if you've only been with her since last May? Fucking hell. When did you propose?

I hope you realize she's a smaller part of your bigger problem, which is yourself. How about you do the work and run the programme here?

[–]dplt1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Ex-Fiancee threw a butter knife at me

Fixed it for you.

[–]Praexology0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You are too worried about respect. Yeesh. Have some expectations and if she deviates there are consequences.

Respect is earned through consistency and it sounds like you don't even know what to be consistent about.

[–]Blue_Andre0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

“She refused my peace offering of reading her a bedtime story” 🤣

I missed that earlier. Come on, dude. If possible, sue her for assault. If not, cut your losses. Maybe go monk mode and focus on self-improvement.

[–]The_Meissner_Effect[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Suing is giving her more of my time. I'm just gonna walk away while I still can. I have no legal obligation to her.

[–]macheagle0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Make sure you have some evidence or alibi in case she goes apeshit and starts physically abusing herself then calling the cops to frame you. It has happened. Have some plan for if that happens brother. As for the other stuff - seems like you’re in good hands based on the other comments here.

[–]wkndatbernardus0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

"I see your true colors, shining through." - gorging yourself because you have no self respect/control.

"I see your true colors, and that's why I love you." -

I don't mind your morbid obesity, so much so that I'm going to pledge more than half my future earnings to you because I'm too pussy to send you where you really belong: fat camp.

[–]Big_Daddy_PDX0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Bro you are a weak little man and she is grooming you to accept her fat guppy ass so she can dole out the Pusey to you when she feels like you’ve earned it. She can’t lose weight but you want a wife that can stay fit? Put that wedding on hold. You’ve been warned

Same program as my Ex. Got so fat, she came home one day from a doctor appt crying about “he said I was clinically obese!!!!” I was like “ well, you are overweight big time”. New GF is like “I’m getting fat” (still better body than the majority of IG models) and I’m like “well, stop eating brownies. No one likes a fat girl” and the next day she’s getting a treadmill. Look at their behavior. Your girl is setting you up “do I look fat in these jeans” - babe; you ARE far.

[–]WesternhagenWinner0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

In the Benny Hill fat bride skit, he marries a skinny girl and she starts gorging herself at the wedding reception and turns into a whale by the end of it.

Your fiancée isn't even waiting for the reception to get fat.

[–]dll1420 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

At least she's telegraphing crazy now... you do what you want, but think real fucking hard. You need to set and enforce boundaries with any woman. Sounds to me like you're not. Women only act as bad as you allow. If you look past this and let her treat you this way and act like that, guess what.... you'll be on wax paper sliding down a slippery slope.

[–]r_u_a_badfish20 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

OP, I have been married 9 years. From my experience, I can tell you that you should not marry your fiancée.

At the very least, tell her you want to take a break and postpone the wedding.

[–]RicoDunne0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

"She has yet to apologize for the disrespect. I told her I was sorry for offending her but not for telling the truth before she went to bed. She refused my peace offering of reading her a bedtime story (women = children), which she usually enjoys.

Should I end this relationship?"

Did you even read what you wrote?

I was assaulted with a knife and later I apologized for her domestic violence against me. How soon should I marry this abusive and disrespectful she-beast?

[–]BluBlac590 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I know I'm late to this. But you cannot lead the mentally ill. Good sex then angry enough to throw a knife at the man she loves ? Followed by the, crying don't leave me, act ? Move on as safely as you can.

[–]RoccoPinkman-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Everyone here is acting like pussies about this, she didn’t smash a bottle and glass him in the face, she acted like a child and threw a butter knife at him (butter knife, so blunt it won’t damage your bread) I wouldn’t class that as domestic violence.

The more important issue is he was posting about her on TRP about her 6 months ago

Should I just end it now? It seems as though this would be the start of a relationship in which she would always control sex. It's the classic, "I like you, so let's wait" argument. May have worked on me in high school, but now not so much

If that’s your thoughts OP, then why the fuck get engaged to her? She isn’t feeling any dread, so she’s being lazy, your going to marry her so why does she need to bother losing weight?

[–]riseandshineand69-2 points-1 points  (7 children) | Copy

She’s stress eating. Have a conversation with her about how eating isn’t a healthy way to cope with stress and you want to support her in using the gym (or other ways) instead. Don’t bring up her body, bring up stress coping habits and the impact on health and be dead hell serious about your need to be with a healthy girl and tell her what healthy means objectively (BMI, waist size, whatever). You lose her when you bring up her body. If you love her and want to stay with her I think it’s fair to push down the wedding until she’s less stressed and learns to cope with it in a healthier way. Also need to have a conversation about throwing the knife (or anything). Tell her it’s a turn off to see her lose control like that. If she’s half decent she’ll feel embarrassed about it and the shame should bring on strong enough feelings to not do it so impulsively again.

[–]so_woke_da_wookie2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

Yo Lady! We’re all stocked up on crazy around here.

TL, DR: Fuck off

[–]riseandshineand69-2 points-1 points  (3 children) | Copy

lol wow so alpha bravo

[–]so_woke_da_wookie1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

How could I have I made it better for you darling?

[–]riseandshineand69-2 points-1 points  (1 child) | Copy

ya can’t :)

[–]so_woke_da_wookie2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I know. I hit all the right notes, first time.

[–]Cloudy_Pirate0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

paging /u/HornsOfApathy/ or /u/SteelSharpensSteel/

as much as I love the username

[–]SteelSharpensSteelMod / Red Beret[M] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Taken care of.



You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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