Before FDS, I was a bob-the-builder type who was going 50/50 with my BF during the entire relationship, moved in with him after a year, and gave him wife privileges. Think bang maid cool girl type. Ugh, I feel disgusted even thinking about the old me. We both started out wanting to be friends with benefits which worked out for us for a while. Long story short he caught feelings and asked me to be exclusive. I said yes after lots of hesitation (in hindsight, I should have listened to my goddamn instinct). We eventually moved to the PNW to start our new jobs. As the days went on, we started to talk about marriage and buying property. He brought up common law marriage and starting joint bank accounts but never wholeheartedly agreed to marriage. He's heard too many horror stories so he's not keen on it. I told him I'd never buy a house or share funds with a man I'm not married to (at least my mom taught me something right about dating) and I plan to not work when I'm married if I don't want to for my own reasons. He then proceeds to debate with me about "couples needing to both work in order to live." This is a weak argument for lazy men. My repulsion for this 50/50 relationship had gotten so bad, that I could not stomach him touching me and asking for sex.
After FDS, I ended the 3-year live-in girlfriend romantic relationship. He's even been kinder towards me since I made my decision. Maybe he respects me more now? Idk. I will never want to be with this guy romantically ever again unless he did a complete 180. I mean being a whole provider man. He won't, so I've accepted who he is and decided to move on. No more wasted time on my dime. He already looking for other girls on Bumble whose time needs wasting. I really feel sorry for those women. He's going to make them work for him forever. Beware dating apps, ladies. They truly are time wasters. Also, his friends also have live in gfs who are bob the builder types as well. Coincidence? I don't think so.
TLDR: The point of the story is, he knew he was wasting my time. He was sneaky. He promised to buy me an engagement ring, even said he picked it out, and to get married (future faking). Once you start having the same conversation over and over again, no one is going to change. Cut your losses and move on with some dignity. A man doesn't need 2, 3, 5, 8, or 15 years to decide if he's going to marry you, it's either a yes or no, sometimes immediately. He WILL, however, ACT like you are married and confuse the hell out of you. HE WILL WASTE YOUR PRECIOUS TIME. I'm so grateful to FDS for giving me the tools to get this breakup over with because my ass was definitely putting it off. You guys saved me.
Keep calm, be on your queen shit, move in silence and level tf up!
Update: I'm getting a lot of bitter messages from scrote lurkers regarding this post. Your cowardice is so adorable. Keep spending your precious time trying to talk to me. I'll never give you the time of day. I know better now. To the amazing women who wrote in solidarity, thank you and keep leveling up.
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It made me smile. Welcome to the club. 💘
I was in a 50/50 relationship once, and I felt nothing but disgust for him. I resented him for his laziness, his lack of generosity, and a part of me knew he was taking advantage of me and wasting my time.
This was before FDS. I’m happy I met my tribe. 💗💘💅
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