Wow...just wow

ebeccabo · 2016-10-05T09:18:49+00:00

Men's helpline?

-Hello? My wife has been hitting me a lot tonight. I've locked myself in the bathroom.

-Sir, are you worried you may strike your wife? You sound upset.

-No. She's being very violent. She said she wanted to kill me.

-Sir, you sound very angry. Calm down. Violence doesn't solve anything.

-She's kicking the door in! Help!

-Don't you hit her!

Matti-Koopa · 2016-10-05T11:44:53+00:00

It's even worse now.

This service provides counselling for men who are concerned about their violent and abusive behaviours.

Just compare the "book recommendations" on both pages...

nullibicity · 2016-10-05T09:51:34+00:00

Wait, what?! I thought, "Well, I guess it's okay to have separate phone numbers for female victims and male victims—better than nothing." And then I read further.

Kobathesealion · 2016-10-05T10:23:36+00:00

This certainly makes me feel violent and abusive. I should call someone.

NeverCallMeFifi · 2016-10-05T12:29:23+00:00

Usability person here.

This is a common mistake made when business folks, not actual users, decide how things need to be. If a group of users actually reached out to the owner of the site, it would probably get changed. IF--and I need this here--IF the business owner has a set of balls and is willing to go against everyone else who has worked there for a frillion years and will say, "but it's always been that way". At that point, the only recourse is to go to the media and find a sympathetic ear. If you go that route, you'll probably need to start their job for them and give the statistics for female-to-male abuse as well as reported vs not reported, ending with the suggested outcome for the website.

The obvious answer is to simply change the verbiage to Are You A Victim of Domestic Abuse" (especially since the very first word in their site title CHILD protection and not WOMEN protection). Then the second title could read something like "Are You An Abuser". Because, yes, women can abuse men, but are much more likely to abuse their own children statistically.

If anyone is interested in pursuing this, I'll help tracking down the right people. It's important enough that it should be changed ASAP. Unlike the picky-uney crap I'm dealing with in my meeting right now (who the fuck CARES what color border the box has???)

lolreallythou · 2016-10-05T14:19:27+00:00

This made me recall a memory from not long ago.

I was taking my daughter to the U.S for the first time and flew in via Toronto to go on the short journey to my hometown across the border. When I arrive the Canadian immigration agent goes to me - How long will you be in Canada, eh? About 2 hours while I drive across the border.

Does her mother know you are taking your daughter here? Yes, of course

Do you have a note from her mother? No.....??? I'm her Father

(speaking to my daughter) xxxxx is this your Daddy? What the fucking shit

TheRavenousRabbit · 2016-10-05T14:22:41+00:00

I once called a domestic abuse help-line. I was 18. I wanted to commit suicide because part of my family had sexually, physically and emotionally abused me for years.

"I really need help" I said, sobbing. "I don't know what to do and I can't deal with it anymore. I don't want to live anymore. My -Bleep- is touching me and hurting me, I -" I was interrupted, the other person on the phone promptly said "We don't deal with this sort of thing, I can help you stop abusing your -Bleep- if that is what you want."

I was so stumped and utterly flabbergasted that they thought that I was the abuser despite me telling them what was going on. That I was being abused in every way possible. I couldn't deal with that, hung up the phone and then tried to OD on my depression medication.

This is a true story, a story that I went through. My abuser is female. I was one of the lucky ones, since I used such an unreliable method of suicide. If I had a gun at that point, or had the balls to cut my wrists, I wouldn't have been here today.

And people always ask me "But why are you a Men's Rights Activist?! Feminism stands for equality!" - The helpline I called is our national helpline for domestic abuse victims. Its rules, guidelines and ethics were set up by a feminist and continues to use feminist standards.

Yes, I wonder why I'm a Men's Rights Activist. It's so strange.

showmerex · 2016-10-05T10:46:43+00:00

Equality!

JordFord · 2016-10-05T11:14:30+00:00

Gosh this makes me angry! Think I might abuse my wife to release the stress

feedmecarrots · 2016-10-05T09:24:09+00:00

They honestly believe that women don't harm men. That is the problem with letting feminist own the DV industry. It is a cash cow for them. The sad part is that not a thing get done about most of the domestic violence because it is not acknowledged.

Vryk0lakas · 2016-10-05T09:19:34+00:00

While a valid point this is rather old and has been changed. That doesn't mean it doesnt accurately represent the challenges men face today.

Edit: I stand corrected. I thought this had been changed. A small portion has been added but it still implies that men have trouble not becoming violent.

0228 · 2016-10-05T12:30:27+00:00

I am a trained/certified sexual assault and domestic violence counselor. We are trained in how to deal with men. There is a special unit in the 40 hour class that focuses on men. I dont know whats up with Western Australia, but thats fucked up.

speedisavirus · 2016-10-05T13:45:22+00:00

I hope people living there write their local government officials and file an official complaint against that service. This is disgusting. In Maryland it's about the same. The courses women have to go to when they beat men are called relationship skills classes and are more like therapy which they have talk of how to recognize men trying to indicate a fight. Men go to abuse prevention classes where they are demonized and told it's all their fault. I wrote a letter to the appropriate authorities about the disparity and was ignored. Not sure what I expected in this liberal echo chamber.

wittlewadio · 2016-10-05T13:45:40+00:00

[permanently deleted]

ConradOCE · 2016-10-05T13:49:38+00:00

Makes me feel proud living in western Australia....

Australia as a whole has horrible mens rights stances. I remember just a few months ago the topic being debated on the radio about funding for domestic voilence for women's helplines and multiple male callers getting completely shut down when they try to raise the issue of male DV. They were sperting statistics like 1/3 women will experience while only 1/20 males as some sort of excuse to dismiss the issue. Well that works out to be 15% of DVs according to those probably dodgy statistics so where is the 15% time devotion to the issue or where is the 15% of the funding to male call centres. They want equality?? MY FUCKING ARSE.

thesarcasmic · 2016-10-05T13:49:53+00:00

I want to make a joke but it's just fucking infuriating.

DerangedGinger · 2016-10-05T13:53:09+00:00

You can't even discuss domestic violence without most people making it a 100% women's issues. When you bring up the fact that you're male and have been a victim of abuse you just get laughed at because a big guy like me should just be a punching bag any time a woman can't control her anger, but if I even raise my voice while being attacked I'm the incarnation of evil itself.

pukalo · 2016-10-05T14:58:47+00:00

I'm glad this post showed up on the front page. That means more people can see it, even if that means butthurt feminists are crying in the comments.

molested_baby · 2016-10-05T13:30:34+00:00

This will probably get buried, but I fucking called them. A woman answered and after we exchanged greetings I informed her as to why it's sexist, now I obviously know she wasn't the one who wrote it, but she rebuttled with a "statistically men are the aggressors" line. Yeah because men don't usually report agressive/abusive behaivour as often as women do. I also told her that a screen cap of their website is being mocked by thousands and if they want to avoid public humility should probably change the fucking sentance a bit. I think she got my point.

elebrin · 2016-10-05T11:51:53+00:00

Just goes to prove a point: there is nobody out there to help us, except ourselves. We need to learn to do a better job at supporting our friends when shit gets rough because all the social structures that have helped us historically have rotted away through our inaction or through the meddling of women.

CrummyDunks · 2016-10-05T14:10:41+00:00

I just subscribed to this sub. Beforehand, I had no idea there was such a bias on men, is it really this prevalent?

danthemanaus · 2016-10-05T12:44:44+00:00

[Aussie here]

Dear Internet,

On behalf of all Aussies, I'm sorry.

Sincerely,

the East Coast.

wort286 · 2016-10-05T14:47:27+00:00

Here's the site: https://www.dcp.wa.gov.au/CrisisAndEmergency/Pages/DomesticViolenceHelplines.aspx

I thought it was bullshit but nope. Click "Click here for more information" and read the descriptions.

kensai01 · 2016-10-05T13:56:33+00:00

That's so fucked. Thing is, a lot of young men will think that is 100% accurate based on being raised by women who think not about equality bout about dominance. Feminism nowadays is nothing about equality and all about cherry picking perceived benefits the other gender has and avoiding the negative aspects of said gender. It's sad, but if a girl even has a whif of feminazism it's an immediate next in my book.

PatrickTulip · 2016-10-05T14:06:09+00:00

I checked the web site... this shit is for real. Also, there are self-help booklets/fact sheets for men who want to change. Damn.

KPdvr · 2016-10-05T14:17:51+00:00

I was like "only in America" until I saw it was West Australian......where I live. The fuck man?!?

DrChubntuck · 2016-10-05T14:23:27+00:00

That is fucking mind blowing. That is so fucking ludicrous. Just wow.

Zanlo63 · 2016-10-05T14:31:42+00:00

This is fucked.

sayjessy · 2016-10-05T15:09:01+00:00

What a good way to discourage a man from using the hotline of he needed it. Even if it offers help for men further down, it was still presented as men being abusers. And what scares me more is all of these "you'd have to be a pussy to get abused by a woman" comments I'm seeing from people visiting the sub. Like yes all men are big and strong and all women are meek and fragile and there are absolutely no variations in this standard. People are so fucking clueless.

PWhat · 2016-10-05T12:03:48+00:00

Slightly changed now

Information and support is also available for men who have experienced family and domestic violence.

rangamatchstick · 2016-10-05T11:57:13+00:00

Yep, that looks about right for WA...yet the blokes here have a higher chance of killing themselves than hitting a chick.

Arabian_Wolf · 2016-10-05T12:39:25+00:00

Ah, feminism.

ThePigmanAgain · 2016-10-05T10:11:19+00:00

Pretty much the way all state governments see it in Australia.

leemachine85 · 2016-10-05T13:57:48+00:00

Isn't there data that shows its women that are more likely to be abusive and violent towards their partners?

Us men just don't report it but I know if I did half the shit my wife has done out of emotional anger/upsetness I would have been arrested or she would have left me long ago.

SpecialOfficerDoofy · 2016-10-05T13:18:56+00:00

It's all about controlling the narrative

the_world_must_know · 2016-10-05T13:23:01+00:00

I'm confused. If a woman is afraid she might hit someone, which number does she call? What if she identifies as a potato? Maybe they should just have a line for people who get punched, and a line for people who punch other people?

Dick_Fart_Champion · 2016-10-05T13:28:29+00:00

The Australian government is retarded.

Solution: Domestic Violence Helpline

Provides support to all genders on both sides of the issue

keeperh2o · 2016-10-05T13:29:27+00:00

Wow this makes me very angry i should call the mens help line to make sure i dont hurt anyonem

deadfallpro · 2016-10-05T13:32:24+00:00

They don't get funding for those who don't fit their narrative. Almost 50% of the victims observed as a cop were male. Often told, "No one will believe you," by their female attacker.

2016-10-05T12:50:05+00:00

this has to be reposted on this sub about a thousand times already.

NotBryzgoalie30 · 2016-10-05T11:13:45+00:00

I feel like kangaroo attacks would be a bigger issue than DV in Australia but I don't know

Captain_Bu11shit · 2016-10-05T12:48:35+00:00

Wait, if I remember right, this was posted like a year ago and there was an actual response from the creators of the site saying they were going to fix it.

Is this an old picture or did they not fix it?

keeperh2o · 2016-10-05T13:12:29+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Yeah_righto_mate · 2016-10-05T14:17:01+00:00

This is where I'm from and I've actually brought it up with them previously with no response back!

mountaintop123 · 2016-10-05T14:01:36+00:00

This makes me want to do violent and abusive things to people

Skywatermelon · 2016-10-05T14:18:48+00:00

That sounds more like a helpline for werewolves.

Talindras · 2016-10-06T18:03:05+00:00

Is this real?

SSDan007 · 2016-10-05T13:43:54+00:00

They forgot about how all men are rapists just waiting for an opportunity.

Tutush · 2016-10-05T13:02:47+00:00

Information and support is also available for men who have experienced family and domestic violence.

cablebent1988 · 2016-10-05T13:45:15+00:00

Rodger, calling hotline.

Root176400 · 2016-10-05T14:25:42+00:00

Yup. That's the way of the world. Men must always be wrong, right?

pohatu · 2016-10-05T14:29:28+00:00

How sexist that they would just assume women don't need counseling on how to become abusive. only men get help with becoming abusers?!? Presume much?

scwizard · 2016-10-05T14:30:45+00:00

Not the first time this has been reposted. Probably won't be the last either.

letsfuckinrage · 2016-10-05T14:51:14+00:00

God this is fucking infuriating.

mazdanig · 2016-10-05T14:56:16+00:00

I am so triggered right now. ughhh sooo mad. I could just punch someone

BigBiggest · 2016-10-05T15:08:54+00:00

This issue angers me to no end. I have an uncle who is like a brother to me, he's the most laid back guy in the world. Literally one of the nicest people you'd ever meet. 2 years ago he started dating this woman, who at first seemed cool, and our entire family was happy for them. About a year ago we discovered that she's quite psyco. She will rage hard and burn his stuff, smash things, and verbally and mentally abuse him to no end. Since our culture dictates only women are victims, he can't seem to understand how bad the situation is. "She loves me" he tells us. She lives with him, so it makes it that much more difficult to convince him he should ditch her.

overattribution · 2016-10-05T15:10:46+00:00

Serious question... If this was the result of a machine learning algorithm that determined these results were more likely to decrease domestic violence, how would you feel about it?

rebelyis · 2016-10-05T15:25:47+00:00

Came here to say that it's an old repost, but it looks like they haven't changed much

Geldo · 2016-10-05T23:02:08+00:00

Women if you have been raped, call here for help! Men if you are raping or considering it call here for help!

If you have been the victim of racism, call here for counseling! If you are a whitey and considering something racist call here for counseling!

Mentioned_Videos · 2016-10-06T00:30:51+00:00

Videos in this thread:

Watch Playlist ▶

VIDEO	COMMENT
Police Training for Domestic Violence with Donald Dutton	1 - Researchers since the 1970s have provided evidence that the rates of abuse and victimization for men and women are quite close. In addition, the majority of abuse is two way, so getting proper treatment for both men and women is important to actually...
Canadian Senate Told Men Are Also Victims of Domestic Violence	1 - An approach favoring women at the expense of victims of female abusers does not reflect reality. The evidence shows that the majority of dv is two-way, matched in severity. This is to say both partners are abusive. The next most common type is female...
POCKET SAND	0 -

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JohnMusk · 2016-10-07T08:28:08+00:00

A response from the Department for Child Protection and Family Support (Western Australia):

Family and domestic violence is a gendered crime in that research shows it is usually men who choose to use violence against women... In Western Australia, the Men’s Domestic Violence Helpline is funded to provide telephone-based counselling, information, support and referral for men who self-identify as at risk of, or who are using violence. It is acknowledged that both women and men can be victims of family and domestic violence. Should a man experiencing violence contact the Men’s Domestic Violence Helpline he would be provided with any necessary services and supported accordingly by the telephone counsellor.

TL;DR: The male helpline is funded primarily to help men at risk of using violence, but they wont hang up if you are being abused

RetroGmr · 2016-10-05T13:00:24+00:00

Yes we fucking get it stop reposting this every day.

barkologix · 2016-10-05T13:01:38+00:00

I knew a man in an abusive marriage. His wife wouldn't let him have his clothes after a shower sometimes... TBH, we thought it was fucking hilarious at the time.

UncleSamRI · 2016-10-05T13:45:51+00:00

Awesome comment. Clearly written by women attempting to think from a man's perspective.

Sexism will never end, it just deforms.

karmacrazywarboi · 2016-10-05T12:26:21+00:00

Women literally have made/make my life harder every day. I've seen and been the victim of many different types of abuse from women over many years. Seriously the gender that abuses and looses their temper the most are women. Then they have that absolute gall to suggest that I'm the bad gender. I'm the one society needs to watch out for and keep in check.

you_cant_banme · 2016-10-05T13:19:13+00:00

This is like 2 or 3 years old. Is this still relevant? Is it still on the site/whatever?

dilirst · 2016-10-05T12:44:47+00:00

Didn't read the title until I already had the same visceral reaction.

Gankswitch · 2016-10-05T14:04:57+00:00

all seriousness aside, this is pretty funny. you could recite this verbatim on stage and get good laughs. it's ready-made comedy.

ArtDecoAutomaton · 2016-10-05T13:46:43+00:00

Maybe that approach was informed by real life statistics and sober pragmatism?

willelmdafo · 2016-10-05T13:38:17+00:00

The trigger is strooong with this one!

ChadLadiesMan · 2016-10-05T12:28:07+00:00

I won't lie, this made me chuckle.

Are you sure it's authentic not just some troll post?

ChaosOpen · 2016-10-05T14:16:24+00:00

The problem with woman on man violence is its a lot more about mental abuse whereas the physical damage is often less severe. Contrary to male on female, where the damage is often significantly physical. So, it appears that male on female violence is worse, however, once you recover and move on, often the mental scars are very small. A woman gets out of the hospital, breaks up with her partner, and can move on to live a normal life. However, with psychological wounds that a woman inflicts on a man, its a bit harder to recover from, even after the two are separated the mental scars stay with him. But from a third person's perspective it doesn't appear as bad.

cablebent1988 · 2016-10-05T13:41:03+00:00

[permanently deleted]

NotMyFinalAccount · 2016-10-05T14:26:31+00:00

Hahahahaha!!!

himestein · 2016-10-05T15:12:03+00:00

Don't care how many times this is reposted, will always upvote.

AlkalineHume · 2016-10-05T14:53:32+00:00

Honest question: why does "Western Australia's DV website is fucked up" get translated into "feminism is evil?" Seems like a pretty big leap to me.

yumcha_daily · 2016-10-05T12:56:05+00:00

Is it possible that a man with violent tendencies might want to seek help to stop those tendencies? This is a way to do that. It's not implying all men are violent. Stop being a bunch of whining babies.

percocet_20 · 2016-10-05T11:28:37+00:00

The page is about half way to where it needs to be

Medium_Rare_Cancer · 2016-10-05T13:05:13+00:00

Men have it so hard buuhuu

DONT_MEME_ON_ME · 2016-10-05T13:26:06+00:00

[permanently deleted]

boss_electro · 2016-10-05T13:37:15+00:00

This post is stupid. There are charities out there that support male victims of domestic abuse. This isn't one of them. What this does offer though is a level of support for men who fear they are becoming too abusive of their partners. I doubt there are as many outlets for this kind of support. I understand why this subreddit exists but you're going to have delve deeper than the low hanging fruit for faux outrage.

gowby · 2016-10-05T13:41:42+00:00

A ridiculous majority of violent crimes are committed by men. Thats statistics, not sexism.

PyrotechnicTurtle · 2016-10-05T13:31:35+00:00

This is at least several years old. It looks like this now.

ftctkugffquoctngxxh · 2016-10-05T13:52:58+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Schmingleberry · 2016-10-05T14:50:54+00:00

Rename this sub to /r/betamales please

fouir · 2016-10-05T14:39:26+00:00

If this really offends you maybe you should call the little bitch help line

Sonyvax · 2016-10-05T14:15:28+00:00

What a drama over nothing, yea they're going to set up a lifeline for the 3 guys a year who are hit by their wives. Great use of taxes!

Title	Wow...just wow
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	7373
Comments	459
Date	October 5, 2016 8:41 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/55yjed/wowjust_wow/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/wowjust-wow.940479 https://theredarchive.com/post/940479

Comments

Information and support is also available for men who have experienced family and domestic violence.

Equality!