[Discussion] Why men should pay for dates

jax006 · 2018-09-12T01:36:30+00:00

Meanwhile, a man’s SMV only increases until he’s like 40-45.

This isn't true in the least lol

Whole premise is dumb

hammerhaunts · 2018-09-12T01:32:57+00:00

How does paying compensate that at all

goatismycopilot · 2018-09-12T01:53:09+00:00

Bottom line if you are a hot chick and men will pay for dates for time in your orbit why would you go 50/50?

Whodunnit88 · 2018-09-12T02:14:45+00:00

I'm sure there is a reasonable argument about why men should pay for dates, but I can't find it in your post.

darksoldierk · 2018-09-12T02:18:46+00:00

It isn't men's jobs to pay for your SMV. You work, you earn money, pay for your own dinner.

GridReXX · 2018-09-12T02:50:47+00:00

“Should” is up to each individual.

But I think it makes sense for men to pay if the following is true:

he wants sex at a rate more than she wants sex, and she acquiesces to his wants, not her own.
she has his kids (body is traumatized) and does most of the work regarding those kids
they live together, but she’s the only one really maintaining the home.
if the woman spends a lot of effort and money ensuring she looks beautiful, exfoliated, soft, radiant, and well kept and said man greatly appreciates those things.

I don’t find your OP the most convincing reason. But there are definitely arguments for why men pay.

throwawayemotions34 · 2018-09-12T02:12:12+00:00

I get where you are going with this. But I dont believe there should be a transactional stance about going on dates. A guy shouldn't HAVE to do anything. This is the male equivalent of a woman being expected to put out because he paid for a few drinks. No.

If you have sex with her and don’t marry her, that raises her n-count and lowers her SMV to help her find the best future husband.

Then we have to be a bit more chosey and if you find a man who puts you down bc you have a few lays, then he is not worth the time. Most of these men advocating for low count partners bc higher N count = cheating off of 0 experience and just speculation, honestly are probably not quality men to begin with. Unless, do you feel a high N count deems yourself as being dirty?

Men take away a woman’s best assets to help her find love and marriage: her looks and youth. Men should pay for dates to compensate for lost SMV.

Then a woman should just become a nun and save her virtue for God. But seriously the best way a man can do that is by marrying her. But paying for dates is asking him to basically rent you until he's done since you gave up something that will take away from future success but somehow him paying makes up for it. We are worth more than that girl.

Pay ur own stuff. If he doesn't then you can rationalize to not sleep with him. Win-win. If he does, dont look at it like he did because he owes you something thats how a entiltment, princess complex brews up. And u can also choose to not sleep with him too.

2018-09-12T02:52:42+00:00

Both people don't know if it's going to work out right away and are taking the same potentially wasted time risk. Making things transactional takes away from the fun and mystery of getting to know them better and turns it into a high pressure sale. You don't have to sleep with them and can mitigate time wasted by cutting it off the moment it seems pointless if marriage asap is your goal. But you won't find a partner without a time investment of some sort.

Edit: on thinking about it I'd say time is a more precious resource for high quality men than money. I knew my husband when we were with other people; and I know he'd sooner buy his ex food and fuck than have used his PTO for her.

kandyapplez · 2018-09-12T03:20:50+00:00

i kind of see what you're saying. men need to compensate for dates because my romantic and sexual time is worth 10x what his is. if you expect me to show you up you need to sweeten the deal just a bit by doting on me in that way at least. i could easily pay for anything i want, its not me being a gold digger. i just need you to show me that you understand the dynamic between us.

all that said, i have literally never encountered men not wanting to pay on dates irl. like its never even a point of discussion, while online you would think this is some highly contentious issue tearing apart the sexes.

passepar2t · 2018-09-12T03:55:11+00:00

lol, this reads like an attempted "gotcha" post where the OP clearly doesn't believe her own stated premise.

Merger-Arbitrage · 2018-09-12T04:36:41+00:00

a man’s SMV only increases until he’s like 40-45.

Higher age = higher BMI (fatter people) = more sexually attractive (higher SMV)? Oh shit, no! Fatter =/= more sexy.

yasee · 2018-09-12T01:37:07+00:00

this is crazy talk for crazy people

LSTW1234 · 2018-09-12T02:05:58+00:00

Men should pay for dates because women spend so much money on their appearance. I mean every time I’ve gone on a first date I’ve gotten a manicure and an eyebrow wax, that’s like $50 right there. It’s only fair.

LivelyChartreuse · 2018-09-12T02:13:35+00:00

Can I hear an exact dollar to SMV point ratio?

reluctantly_red · 2018-09-12T02:23:27+00:00

Men should pay for dates to compensate for lost SMV.

WTF? No one ever gets compensated for lost relationship opportunity costs.

I'll seed a few bucks for cheap initial dates as a cost of doing business but after that she sure as shit better pull her own weight.

TheMarbleSlab · 2018-09-12T01:36:03+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Taipanshimshon · 2018-09-12T01:49:11+00:00

Men don’t take away a woman’s assets as you’ve pointed out.

According to your logic time does that.

EsauTheRed · 2018-09-12T01:58:55+00:00

Every dime that I spend on a woman that isn't bearing my children (or even is bearing my children) is one less that I could be investing into my kid's college fund

wekacuck · 2018-09-12T02:01:37+00:00

What's your suggested ballpark $/hour/SMV rate?

TheMarbleSlab · 2018-09-12T05:07:20+00:00

[permanently deleted]

tallwheel · 2018-09-12T05:51:38+00:00

This is some really old-school thinking about men and women. In many traditional cultures men literally have to pay for brides, and in others men have to pay for divorce. The root reason is the exact same reasoning as in your post: For wasting her youth, and using her up, or deflowering her.

There are probably more people who (at least subconsciously) think like this in the modern West than most people realize. Lots of people think men should pay women for their time and for their sexual attention or even sex, whether they directly state it that way or not.

Whisper · 2018-09-12T07:20:00+00:00

"Should" just means "I want".

Barely-moral · 2018-09-12T11:01:43+00:00

nailpolishremover2? is this you? If that is the case... Hi! I have been wondering where were you. If that is not the case... this post and this account in general sounds quite similar to nailpolish...

Well... lets answer the post then.

There is no "should" for anyone. Sure, you can have that standard and refuse to date anyone who is not compensating for your time and loss in SMV. But I will tell you, that kind of attitude tanks your RMV way more than the SMV you lose by wasting 10 dates on someone who will not marry you.

Just in case you are not nailpolishremover2 I will say to you the same things I said to her.

Life is not fair. Women get their SMV frontloaded and have to use that advantage to get a partner while the clock is ticking. That will not change.

Neither men nor life cares about how unfair that is.

Now, know exactly the kind of man you want to get. Give him a reason to pick you over any other woman he can attract. If you can't give him that reason, then your standards are to high. Lower your standards until you get a partner or until you realize that the juice is not worth the squeeze and go your own way.

JaJammerJan · 2018-09-12T11:33:02+00:00

Women only spend time dreaming about chad and love and marriage with chad untill they're 35yo.

Your average man ain't chad so your average man doesn't owe you anything. In fact, women own a lot to average men since women waste their prime years chasing chad.

crackrocksteady7 · 2018-09-12T02:08:42+00:00

Men take away a woman’s best assets to help her find love and marriage: her looks and youth. Men should pay for dates to compensate for lost SMV.

I don't have to and I don't

what now

sublimemongrel · 2018-09-12T01:48:00+00:00

They should if they want or shouldn’t if they don’t want. This is too transactional for me. I never felt my dying SMV clock running down when I was dating. Granted I was still pretty young when I got locked down by a man.

Pope_Lucious · 2018-09-12T02:26:56+00:00

Men should pay for dates because they want sex more than women.

Women’s time is only more valuable to the individual woman.

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throwawayemotions34 · 2018-09-12T02:54:46+00:00

Just do yourself a favour and please don't think majority of men think the way these people on the internet do. They are on the internet bashing women for a reason. Not everyone is Chad or has that complex conscience nature to them.

You will meet Chads, you may get ghosted, you will probably be a Stacy that ur date will wind up complaining about that he paid for everything and you never spoke again. Be prepared that its a two sided game. Dont sleep with someone you don't like. You might sleep with someone you do and he wasn't feeling it after or vise versa - see woman are taught what RP men are just learning about dating yet fail to realize - Not everyone is the same so don't gloss over an entire gender bc of a few fucked up ones. Fact of the matter is; you can unweed the garden and those suckers will still find a place to grow.

Don't walk into the dating scene nose up at men already looking down on them bc you already expect them to waste your precious youth and time. You'll come across being really prude and blocking a barrier indirecty that will then have you in a mental breakdown at 30, bitter at the younger women snatching up "all the good men"

LUClEN · 2018-09-12T03:26:22+00:00

Makes me feel good to pay her way.

dudewheresmytest · 2018-09-12T03:33:36+00:00

Meanwhile, a man’s SMV only increases until he’s like 40-45

This is BS, so your entire premise is BS too. Men age like milk.

Hell even fat ugly 45 year old single mothers have more SMV than the average guy her age. There's far more demand for women than men across the board, it's not just Stacies.

CapnRonRico · 2018-09-12T03:38:10+00:00

In my experience, if a woman does not or is not interested in sexors with you then she will be quite keen to go halves in the bill.

If the possibility of rude times awaits then you only hurt yourself by expecting her to pay half. If you are right on the border or she is not really attracted to you then it could push you from the naughty times pile to the other pile.

I think this is because both women and men know there is an unwritten rulebook that states if the man pays for everything then the woman is at least open to the possibility of a sexual encounter at some point in the not too distant future unless he does something to stuff it up.

When a woman pays half then the woman is saying that this interaction is straight friendship. Although I have had women I purchases a drink for in Mcdonalds one time on a pre organised date and I never got anywhere with her so there are some exceptions to this rule.

She was 26 and I was 41 so that could have had something to do with it but she did agree to it before hand, maybe it was just to shut me up (she was my step instructor)

xlithernigga · 2018-09-12T03:39:04+00:00

I mean we should but why would I if I don’t have too.

TheMarbleSlab · 2018-09-12T04:38:23+00:00

It's the other way around surely? Women should see it as investing in the future. Like with, say, real estate or a pension plan.

SRU_91 · 2018-09-12T06:19:03+00:00

No, women should pay for dates because of the sheer amount of work guys have to put in to attracting women in the first place.

ifeelfuckingterrible · 2018-09-12T06:36:34+00:00

LMAO good luck with that then.

PennnyLame · 2018-09-12T07:19:52+00:00

Men should be fun enough to make wasting your youth on them worth it.

Eastuss · 2018-09-12T07:43:05+00:00

[Discussion] Why women should let their man fuck other women and even bring women for him to fuck.

Every moment that passes reduces a man's ability to get sex with young fresh women. Meanwhile, a woman's libido doesn't matter, once she's impregnated it's good to go for 9 months.

Every moment that a man spends not fucking other girls is a moment wasted. If you have sex with him and don't let him fuck other girls, that lowers his N count and so he's less valuable for you and it doesn't help him find other women.

Women take away men's best asset to reach happiness: his time, his money, his energy. Women should bring fresh new women to fuck to their partner.

killallthenarcs · 2018-09-12T10:01:26+00:00

People should pay for dates if they find paying gives them a worthwhile advantage. They should not pay for dates if they do not find this to be the case.

We should react to other people's willingness or not to pay for dates in a similarly self-interested manner.

Nobody is obliged to make the search for love and sex while maintaining an effective personal budget work out for strangers. Nobody is obliged to make access to themselves cheaper or easier for strangers.

Obligations to make things like personal access cheaper, easier etc for other people come about through relationships. Hence your girlfriend will quite likely cook you a plate of spaghetti and watch a video with you at her apartment, but a stranger you meet bagging her groceries at the supermarket is likely not all about that.

Willow-girl · 2018-09-12T11:07:08+00:00

Women want men who will serve their imperatives. Paying for the date signals that you are at least open to the possibility.

abaxeron · 2018-09-12T13:08:04+00:00

All you have listed can also be used as an argument for sex at the end of dates being mandatory. Too fuzzy.

wtknight · 2018-09-12T20:50:16+00:00

I’ve usually paid for dates because I’ve made a lot more money than the women who I’ve dated. I’d be offended if a woman who made just as much money as me expected me to pay for every date. My expectation for a relationship is that it should be egalitarian, and a man paying for every date is essentially prostitution.

GirlsHateMtgplayers · 2018-09-13T08:20:40+00:00

Why would you even go out on dates in 2018?
Just go straight to your place and hook up or meet up at a concert or something.
Dates are a waste of time.

Yeshuare · 2018-09-12T02:24:17+00:00

This is some poopy retard knowledge.

squidracer · 2018-09-12T18:20:51+00:00

This is why i pretend to be poor. I leave the nice car at home and show up to dates in my old farm truck. Does a good job of weeding out gold diggers

Title	[Discussion] Why men should pay for dates
Author	TheMarbleSlab
Upvotes	0
Comments	387
Date	September 12, 2018 1:29 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/9f3edc/discussion_why_men_should_pay_for_dates/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/discussion-why-men-should-pay-for-dates.260861 https://theredarchive.com/post/260861

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