So often the advice given to men who are struggling with loneliness is a suggestion that they should redirect their attention away from women and toward working on themselves instead. While I do think this is fairly shallow advice that fails to take many other factors into consideration, I don't disagree with the underlying principle. Everyone should be striving to be a better version of themselves all the time.
After many years of treading down the path toward becoming a loathsomely self-pitying man who blamed the world for his own mediocrity, I eventually chose to build myself into the sort of man who did indeed manage to turn his life around for the better. I've lost weight, I've become quite fit, I've developed a frequently praised fashion sense, I've managed to relax my nerves and allow my charmingly humorous side to shine forth, I've improved upon my social skills in ways I never even imagined possible, I've lost all fear of approaching others, and so on. In other words, I followed the path of "Work on yourself" and saw the tangible improvements such discipline brought to my life in doing so. I don't regret it.
That said, almost paradoxically, I'm also at the loneliest and most unwanted I've ever been, by women especially. Certainly I'm not perfect and surely need to improve, but it isn't obvious to me where I might be most severely lacking. Even upon asking other men and women, they insist I'm totally fine with no obvious and/or severe shortcomings—and yet they consistently neglect even the possibly of any friendly or romantic feelings to develop. Everyone wants me to succeed, but they never wish to be the ones I succeed with.
I've become horribly depressed due to how unwanted and undervalued I am and have begun to see myself deteriorate. In my self improvement I became religious, but I've begun to see myself falling back on religious narratives as the only thing able to keep me mentally afloat anymore (i.e. "My suffering will be redeemed sooner or later," "This is truly Kali Yuga," etc.). Joys which once distracted me from my deprivation have dulled to the point of being worthless, and every day has become a true hell to such a degree that I will surely not last much longer if this persists. I have no family, no friends, and never once has a woman actually liked me enough to even pursue a friendship with me. I need to be wanted. Not adored, just simply liked by other humans in some capacity beyond being just something they'll momentarily tolerate.
As it pertains to my question, I worked on myself and found myself in hell. Now what? Just keep going? If I keep going as I currently am, I won't last. Humans need love, and I did my part to the fullest extent I could.
TL;DR: I worked on myself as much as I could. It helped, yet I'm lonelier than ever. Now what?
[–]wtknightGen X Slacker[M] [score hidden] stickied comment (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]nicethingyoucanthaveRed Pill Male 31 points32 points33 points
(16 children) | Copy Link
[–]HimNeutron 3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Life_Level_6280 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]AoiLuneNo Pill[S] -3 points-2 points-1 points (13 children) | Copy Link
[–]lalelu2727 8 points9 points10 points (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]bottleblankConscientious Objector 3 points4 points5 points
(5 children) | Copy Link
[–]Ducks_Are_WatchingNo Pill, I'm on rehab 1 point2 points3 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]bottleblankConscientious Objector 2 points3 points4 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]lalelu2727 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]bottleblankConscientious Objector 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]lalelu2727 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]nicethingyoucanthaveRed Pill Male 2 points3 points4 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]purplepillowed 0 points1 point2 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]nicethingyoucanthaveRed Pill Male 2 points3 points4 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]purplepillowed 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]nicethingyoucanthaveRed Pill Male 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]purplepillowed 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]HimNeutron 5 points6 points7 points (11 children) | Copy Link
[–]AoiLuneNo Pill[S] 0 points1 point2 points (10 children) | Copy Link
[–]HimNeutron 0 points1 point2 points (9 children) | Copy Link
[–]AoiLuneNo Pill[S] -1 points0 points1 point (8 children) | Copy Link
[–]HimNeutron 2 points3 points4 points (7 children) | Copy Link
[–]AoiLuneNo Pill[S] -1 points0 points1 point (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]Life_Level_6280 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Kronbopulus 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]HimNeutron 0 points1 point2 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheMedsPedsBlue Pill Woman 3 points4 points5 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]Kronbopulus -1 points0 points1 point (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]TheMedsPedsBlue Pill Woman 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]gymbro718NYC 6 points7 points8 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]lalelu2727 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Philip80005 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]xzpw30s/M/USA/HENRY/blackpill 2 points3 points4 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]tinasnow-poty 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Kronbopulus 4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]Illustrious_Wish_383 6 points7 points8 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]smallstarseekerCritical thinker 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Gravel_RoadsJust a Pill 1 point2 points3 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]gymbro718NYC 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]bottleblankConscientious Objector 1 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]bigdaveyl 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Gravel_RoadsJust a Pill 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]missionarymechanic 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]AGalWithThoughts2 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]name-of-the-wind 0 points1 point2 points (13 children) | Copy Link
[–]AoiLuneNo Pill[S] 2 points3 points4 points (12 children) | Copy Link
[–]name-of-the-wind 2 points3 points4 points (11 children) | Copy Link
[–]AoiLuneNo Pill[S] 2 points3 points4 points (10 children) | Copy Link
[–]festethefoole1 2 points3 points4 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]AoiLuneNo Pill[S] 1 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheMedsPedsBlue Pill Woman 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]lalelu2727 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]name-of-the-wind 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]AoiLuneNo Pill[S] 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]decoy88Men and Women are similar 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheMedsPedsBlue Pill Woman 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]decoy88Men and Women are similar 1 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]lalelu2727 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]decoy88Men and Women are similar 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]AutoModerator[M] -1 points0 points1 point (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]SmilesLikeMardiGrasseriously, like have you seen my silhouette SHEESH -1 points0 points1 point (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]Barneysparky 1 point2 points3 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]SmilesLikeMardiGrasseriously, like have you seen my silhouette SHEESH 0 points1 point2 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]Barneysparky 1 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]SmilesLikeMardiGrasseriously, like have you seen my silhouette SHEESH 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Barneysparky 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]bison5595 -1 points0 points1 point (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]hungrychick404 0 points1 point2 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]AoiLuneNo Pill[S] 1 point2 points3 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]chikiinugget 5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Leather-Creme2611 5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Jason_4422 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]MDFornia 0 points1 point2 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]HimNeutron 5 points6 points7 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]MDFornia 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]AoiLuneNo Pill[S] 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]anon018274031 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]MDFornia 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]HeartKnifeEnjoyer1 points [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]HazyMemory7They hated me because I spoke the truth[M] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Upstairs-Rip-604 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Kronbopulus 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]MasterTeacher123 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]ConcentrateOk1933No Pill 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Life_Level_6280 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link