What does someone finding you attractive feels like?

prolixdreams · 2024-09-28T21:05:17+00:00

They’re happy to see you - you walk into a room and they notice you right away or light up. They pay special attention to you more than other people, seem interested in what you think and how you feel, they engage you in conversation and try to learn more about you. They might sustain eye contact more than normal, stand closer than normal, if you already know each other well enough playful physical contact is a possibility. If you have the kind of dynamic where texting or social media interaction is on the table, they might check in with you early or late and reliably interact with your posts.

You kinda also have to compare how they treat you with how they treat everyone. If they hug everyone, hugging you isn’t a sign unless it’s longer or more frequent.

IronDBZ · 2024-09-28T23:30:50+00:00

It feels like comfort. It feels like you have a second chance if you make a mistake. You have grace given to you.

It feels freeing, like you can make a mistake and just forget about it the next moment because no one will hold it against you.

It's like having extra lives in a video game. You have assurances that you're still in even if you mess up.

abaxeron · 2024-09-28T21:58:19+00:00

If the feeling is mutual, it feels like the best ever dessert served to you on the most relaxing resort at the very beginning of a very long and well-deserved vacation.

If not, it feels like absolutely nothing.

Valuable-Pea8501 · 2024-09-28T22:55:50+00:00

People are way more accepting of you making social "faux pas." I'm awful at reading the room/reacting to social cues, and my appearance is a real crutch. I definitely wouldn't have this amount of grace if I wasn't conventionally attractive.

Otherwise, being seen as physically attractive brings me nothing since it doesn't validate me on an individual level. I do like the social privileges, though.

Red_Guru9 · 2024-09-29T03:57:30+00:00

Mutual attraction feels like magnetism. One-sided attraction feels like a satelite orbitting a celestial body. Mass attraction feels like stage fright, a job interview, and time freezing.

UrbanMonk314 · 2024-09-29T02:56:38+00:00

For me personally, I get that suspicious feeling like when someone's about to pull a prank on u. Like when they gesture for a high five and when u go for it they say "too slow". I feel as tho there's a joke everyone's in on except me.

MikeArrow · 2024-09-28T21:33:10+00:00

The first time this happened to me I was oblivious to it for months. There was this girl that always sat across from me at work. I didn't notice but apparently she had been chatting me up for ages, making small talk, sending expressions of interest, and I just wasn't picking up on them. Eventually she wore this low cut dress and leaned over my desk to get a pen, and that's when it finally clicked.

So, in my experience it feels like nothing, really, until it doesn't.

banthaaaa · 2024-09-28T21:35:47+00:00

In my experience them asking to fuck, but not really any difference in terms of kindness/regularity of contact

leosandlattes · 2024-09-28T20:42:56+00:00

Do you mean sexually attracted or romantically interested? I’m a woman so the experience is not really the same anyway.

In my experience a lot of the former is body language. Maintained eye contact, wanting to be near you, finding excuses to touch you.

Verbally there’s some mix of compliments and playfulness, like light teasing. Not negging, as that’s a completely different strategy, but keeping the conversation flowing and fun.

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southwestheat · 2024-09-29T04:16:56+00:00

How it feels depends entirely on who it is that finds you attractive.

If it's someone you have no interest in, then you don't really care that they find you attractive. In fact, you might not like it if they keep bugging you.

If it's someone you are attractive, then you'll feel excited about it. And nervous, but mostly happy/excited.

Former_Range_1730 · 2024-09-29T06:47:09+00:00

Male. Straight.

It feels great. I feel desired. I feel like I matter. I feel like she needs and wants me. She can't keep her hands off of me. She wants no one else. It the fantastic feeling of I complete her, or should I say, our, puzzle.

Now, when it's a feel I get from a woman when I was single. Her eyes light up when she sees me. I see this because I understand non-verbal cues. I almost feel a slight magnetic pull that we have on each other. Like I'm suppose to talk to her. And when I'm sure she's into me, I get excited on what I'm going to do with her once we get to the intimate stage.

It didn't always used to be this way. I was basically an incel in the past.

sphinxsley · 2024-09-29T08:27:12+00:00

The clues I get when a guy finds me attractive are things like: he finds a way to be near me; has a kind of admiring or even stunned look in his eye/all-over body language; might be smiling, sometimes his mouth falls open. One guy fell backwards over a whole bunch of folding chairs when I looked at him. Locked eyes with another cute guy across a crowded hallway in college once as we were all leaving a party--dated him briefly.

I've had at least four guys and one gay girl show up at my door out of the blue because I was on their mind. (I am straight.)

I'm not your classic 10, I'd say I'm more of a cute girl.

It's flattering, but most times none of that makes me find them more attractive. (The chemistry is either there or it isn't.) I know it sounds trite, but just keep meeting people, and be your best (physically, mentally, socially) for your own style, for yourself. The person you vibe with will notice you.

SecondEldenLord · 2024-09-29T11:29:33+00:00

I don't know, still need to wait and find out.

No_Speech_2309 · 2024-09-29T15:08:17+00:00

This question kind of hurt me to read. I’m sorry you haven’t had that experience and the world can be cruel. It feels validating. And a lot of the time they’ll tell u or ur friends that they find u cute. In terms of non verbal clues, if she stays up to talk to you on the phone that’s a good sign.

SaBahRub · 2024-09-28T22:19:06+00:00

Good if you want it.

Bad if you don’t

G4M35 · 2024-09-29T04:03:36+00:00

Depends, if someone is used to it like they have had women attracted to them all their life, I guess it's not a big deal.

Me, personally, I'm like the ugly duckling story, so I went from an awkward skinny-fat low-self-esteem nerd to a confident guy with abs/biceps and no problems securing FWBs/hookups/ONS(s). I have a few stories, LOL. It feels amazing.

I am now happily married to a young, beautiful woman with an incredible body who adores me. Here and there I look back at some of my ex(s), and I can hadly believe at the caliber/beauty of women that I have "interacted" with.

sunsista_ · 2024-09-29T08:41:08+00:00

All I know is it must feel great. But I’ve given up hope on ever experiencing it.

TallFoundation7635 · 2024-09-29T13:52:40+00:00

They want your time and attention, they contribute to the conversation, they rarely look at the phone when they are talking to you, eye contact is more and better, they give you more chances for physical intimacy(not just sex), better sex etc.

Immediate_Wasabi_920 · 2024-09-29T15:34:08+00:00

No idea

Caicedonia · 2024-09-29T15:55:22+00:00

It feels kind of sus honestly.

But after a while you find that their love is genuine.

And as a man, it almost feels like I’m at a water park or something. It feels like time moves slower.

Hence it is a double edged sword as this will make you prone to laziness. But that’s why you have to master the art of conscious erection. Because if not you will become a slave to your emotions.

RevolutionaryJob7908 · 2024-09-29T17:54:37+00:00

They call you by name, consistently every time they see you. Usually its someone you aren't interested in anyway (my experience).

Miserablemermaid · 2024-09-29T18:18:20+00:00

The pros: pretty privilege. Peers tend to be less judgmental and more forgiving of awkwardness. Sometimes people will help you out, give you free things, or pay you extra attention for no reason. When you walk into a room and set eyes on the most attractive person there, they notice you too.

The cons: the extra attention can be overstimulating. Think about how so many people have gym anxiety because they feel like everyone is looking at them and analyzing what they’re doing. It feels like that, except everyone actually is looking at you. On a smaller scale, one person who’s attracted to you can be overstimulating by constantly giving you extra attention. It’s not always explicitly romantic attention either, it’s just them trying to get close to you. And they almost never take the hint if the feeling isn’t mutual- which means you have to figure out a way to directly tell this kind, sweet individual that they’re being overbearing and that you’re not interested in them. It sucks and it always either makes things awkward or ruins that relationship completely.

AnonPinkLady · 2024-09-30T04:30:24+00:00

I wanna back up a lot of what other folks are saying and also add that if people smile the first time they see your face, or aren’t afraid to make immediate hard eye contact or give you a friendly nod- total strangers too- it means they probably think you’re attractive at a first glance

TopShelfSnipes · 2024-09-30T05:02:51+00:00

With women, because most women don't approach men, it usually takes on some combination of the below, almost all of which is body language:

She actually approaches you. Obvious.
Her attention. She perks up when you walk into a room and looks at you.
Eye contact - she makes direct eye contact with you and smiles.
Shy girl eye contact - she looks at you, but when you look back, she looks away and blushes or smiles, but looks back at you once you look away. You can pick this up easily with good peripheral vision.
She makes an effort to be or stand closer to you in a social setting. Moves her friend group closer to yours. Talks to someone she knows near you.
She joins your social circle, but stands directly across from you and steals glances at you.
If you approach her, her body language is warm and open. Her feet and body face you. She seems relaxed, leans forward, doesn't shrink back from you, close off her body, fold her arms across her chest, or stand at an awkward angle to you. She makes eye contact (bonus points if her pupils dilate), doesn't gaze around or down at the ground. She looks up or level, not down at you (ie by tilting her head back).
If you sit next to her, she scoots closer to you. If you step closer to her, she doesn't step back to maintain the previous distance. In a crowded setting, she allows you into her personal space.
She compliments you, even if indirectly. She may not say "you're handsome" but say you tell her your hobby is playing coed softball, she might say "ooh, I bet you're really good at that"
She flirts with you. Her tone is light, playful, full of banter. She teases you (in a not mean-spirited way, of course)
She initiates physical touch. This can take many forms. Some women will "accidentally" bump you, grab your arm gently, and say sorry. But this isn't an indicator of interest because some people will do this if they legitimately accidentally bump you, so you have to gauge it in the context of the bigger picture of her overall behavior towards you. Some women will give you high five or playfully bump you. Some will touch your arm gently or even tug on you gently. Generally, physical touch is a good sign, especially if she's initiating.
In other settings, she wants to work or collaborate with you. Needs to be accompanied by several physical things on this list too, to say for certain though. Sometimes a girl who sees you as a friend will want to work or collaborate with you so this is not an indicator of interest all by itself.

Flimsy_Incident3226 · 2024-09-28T22:12:20+00:00

I feel validated and like I’m on top of the world tbh. It also gives me a lot of power. People are so much nicer to me.

Nellylocheadbean · 2024-09-28T22:20:58+00:00

It feels good sometimes. They usually compliment you a lot, sometimes they buy you things. You can tell they just enjoy being in your presence.

OddWish4 · 2024-10-07T02:57:32+00:00

Everyone in the room turns to look at you, and everyone has a smile or holds the door. You have an insane dopamine hit and confidence boost. I like public speaking for work because of it.

wtknight · 2024-09-28T22:18:59+00:00

I don’t know. It just gives you confidence in life that you are doing things right.

Imaginary_Sleep_6329 · 2024-09-29T00:20:28+00:00

The handsiness is the big giveaway. Rubbing the forearm, the back the thigh.

UrbanMonk314 · 2024-09-29T02:46:44+00:00

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

rustlerhuskyjeans · 2024-09-29T03:26:50+00:00

If someone wants you bad enough or is very attracted to you, they will do whatever you want. Netflix n chill, get groceries or run errands with you, they have no demands. They will satisfy any sexual desire, if you want a blowjob for an entire hour straight they will happily do it. Sex 3 times in one night, whatever, they are excited.

This will die off into another stage after a month, but this is initial attraction. She’s going to love bomb to try and land a boyfriend with this strategy. She wants you to dump your oxytocin. Such a high percentage of women will do this to land a man, if a girl after 3 dates is trying to take things slow, I just assume she already has or is trying to love bomb some other guy.

I’ve had one night stands, countless hookups, if a girl really is attracted to you and wants you for herself, that’s where you get the highest level lust.

ExcelsiorState718 · 2024-09-29T03:51:26+00:00

I wouldn't know but from observations I don't think people really know when someone finds them attractive..it's like what does being rich feel like sure you can by most of what I want and don't have to worry about bills that's a sense of security..but in my experience you never feel rich maybe theres a certain threshold of wealth where you will but I've had substantial amounts of money and I don't recall feeling rich I just know my bills where paid and fridge was full.

So I think feeling secure in a relationship is what someone finding you attractive feels like but thr problem with feelings is they are fickle thing..and many a man will recall hearing the dreaded "I'm not attracted to you anymore" from their wife,GF whatever...so personally I could never feel secure in a relationship and if a woman seemed to be attracted to me I would just feel she's trying to get something which has always been the case thus far.

Truthfully if you're not atleast an 8 as a man and over 6' no woman is genuinely attracted to you physically.

Careful-Inspector439 · 2024-09-29T05:10:28+00:00

The most obvious is them smiling at you when they see you. Also, going out of their way to talk to you or get in physical proximity to you. Stronger attraction bumps it up a notch or five, compliments, sexual physical contact (from women to men this usually involves somehow getting their breasts to touch your body), compliments, gifts...

Think about what simps (or, putting it more judgmentally, creeps) do around women, and just genderswap it, basically. The only differences here are that a) women do this stuff to/for a smaller proportion of men than men do women, and that b) women do them with less hesitation because they know they're not going to get much pushback less still get MeToo'd for it. On the contrary, if I had tried to report or get back at any of these wanton hussies, I'd have been the one in the proverbial (or literal) dock. That's just how it is.

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SeamoreB00bz · 2024-09-29T06:51:41+00:00

went to the bar last night to see a country concert. and i got hit on. the catch: she was chubby and recently divorced, with kids probably so nothing i would ever actually consider. she may have wanted something but you have to know your mate value which hers is near zero so to think she ever thought she had a chance with me, while endearing, is actually concerning.

Title	What does someone finding you attractive feels like?
Author	Stupid4Knowledge
Upvotes	15
Comments	97
Date	September 28, 2024 4:40 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1fr6ler/what_does_someone_finding_you_attractive_feels/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/what-does-someone-finding-you-attractive-feels.1531393 https://theredarchive.com/post/1531393

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