I am happy with everything else going on in my life... except for women.

I am not physically attractive: I am short (5'5\"), bald, and have a 6.5-7/10 manly face at best. Never received female attention based on my looks. Understandable.

My single mom raised me to be a nice guy. Even though I was a beta piece of shit, I got to learn how to regulate people's emotions and play them like the violin (I had to because I played that role for my mom). I had naive fantasies of true love (a la Disney movies). Have never been in a relationship, still haven't. Lost my virginity at the age of 24.

After a shit ton of work, I am now doing MUCH better at everything, except perhaps for women. I am on top of my career, highly respected, dominant, sociable, rising fast in my workplace, etc. But still, there is not that pure sexual attraction coming from women.

I do get female attention based on my merit. As I become more and more successful, the person at the center of attention, etc., the more I notice female colleagues hovering around. They often introduce me to their friends and sisters, and laying those is pretty easy. I am still not satisfied; they want my social value, not me.

I am also taking dancing lessons, and am one of the top students at my level, and women in the class are crazy about me (because I dance better than the other men, I communicate physically with them better than anybody else, I tell them what to do, etc.). Some of them will literally follow me after class and try to talk to me. I know that my attractiveness to them is situational, not physical. Not satisfied.

Outside work and dancing class... I am still invisible. I met a random girl and one thing led to another and she became a fuck buddy. I later realized that I managed to fuck her because I controlled her emotions the same way I had to do with my mom. I literally just call her whenever I want to have sex. She expressed how humiliated she felt about this, and I just proceeded to play with her again.

I do not feel guilty about exploiting this or that girl for sex, but hate that I cannot get laid without those mental games. I despise the fact that I am not perceived as a sexual being; that I have to game them and shit.

I am not happy with my luck with women.