Im getting 'teased' for trying to learn?

DaygameCoach · 2014-06-19T14:29:10+00:00

Oh....when you get good at this and are dating amazingly hot women...they'll feel stupid.

I have friends that had those kinds of problems in their friends groups. My frame is so strong that I didn't, but if anyone teases me, they better be able to handle what I dish back.

ThrowawayPUA · 2014-06-19T14:49:44+00:00

Let this be a lesson to everyone, don't talk to people outside the community about pickup. They usually get the wrong idea. And the worst critics are the chumps who will be the most jealous of your successes.

Jollyslide · 2014-06-19T14:30:54+00:00

Yup. I think it is jealousy. You have the balls to stand up for yourself and improve. They don't, therefor they ridicule you. Keep doing what you are doing :)

IANAPUA_Yet · 2014-06-19T15:14:54+00:00

I can't directly relate because I only talk about my involvement in the seduction community in general terms such as "working on improving my social skills". There are a few people that know exactly what I'm talking about, but they're all guys that have at least dabbled with it, so they're supportive.

In general, though, when you're teased about something, just go ahead and own it. When the teasing starts, agree and amplify. Play along with and make a few of your own, all while wearing a huge shit-eating grin that says, "It's cool, guys... the last laugh will be mine."

Ultimately, if they're good friends, they'll respect you in the long run for holding your ground. If they're not good friends, they'll fade out of your life. It's a win either way.

goudarziha · 2014-06-19T16:09:24+00:00

There is this expectation among men that you have to be born with the skills of a natural. Of course when people see guys trying to better themselves, they will ridicule, but this is often out of jealousy. These people don't have the gall to do what you are doing because of what other people like themselves would say. Keep doing what you are doing and don't let anyone get to you!

HookCity_ · 2014-06-19T17:56:40+00:00

I cant relate game wise as very few ppl know about it, but it is very similar if you are into fitness, nutrition etc

"Are you going to eat that? i thought u were a fitness freak"

Alot of people tease/make dumb comments on things they do not understand or are jealous of.

Richralph · 2014-06-19T15:07:04+00:00

It's their own insecurity. Maybe a few are naturally good with girls and genuinly with a girl they like, however I imagine most are insecure and unwilling to accept they could improve.

By bullying you it justifies their inadequacy to deal with their own issues. I.e. if they say only losers read these books then that it justifies their refusal to read them itself (of which this refusal is due to their own inability to accept they are not perfect).

Just ignore it, will go away in a few weeks and then in a few years when you have a hot girl you will have the last laugh

GrayFoxHops · 2014-06-19T19:29:10+00:00

It's generally a bad idea to talk about, especially considering that a lot of people have a misconceived notion of what PUA is about. My friend told all of his friends when I had first started approaching. It was a novelty to them. I didn't really get made fun of, actually it opened the door for some people to try giving me advice, but it does change people's impression of you.

Really alpha guys will think it's silly, generally.

From now on I will only tell people who I think might want in, or who might be a good wing. That said, it's important not to hold back too many approaches if you are with friends, because otherwise it can be a big waste of potential.

amyers · 2014-06-19T17:19:28+00:00

don't sweat it man, it's just projection of their own insecurities.

Convictional · 2014-06-19T18:40:22+00:00

This is interesting. I actually am fairly open about seduction and none of my friends seem to mind. I've been doing the self improvement thing for about 2 years now and the only person to ever laugh at me was a 17 year old girl who doesn't get out much (who I'm no longer friends with). I was 19 when I started.

I actually got some of my close friends into it and discovered some other of my friends who were already into it.

Maybe I just have better friends.

recyclablebantha · 2014-06-19T17:56:38+00:00

They have told everyone in my social group, and now they ridicule me for trying. Calling a loser for learning to get women. Keeping in mind that they are all 18 years old.

I'm still going to continue and learn, but can anyone else relate to this? being put down for trying the game?

First off, get a new social group. People who are going to focus so much on bringing you down, don't DESERVE to be around you. And you deserve better: people should be raising up you and inspiring you to be more. Not this ridiculous shit of everyone scrambling to tear down the people around them instead of spending their energy improving themselves.

Secondly, I can relate. People ridicule what they don't understand. You'll deal with this shit even if you don't actually bring it up.

Anecdote: I didn't even bring up "game" at work. Just mentioned something in passing that I have been socially "busy" and alluding to good times had on the weekend, at the office. And some (conservative) person with too much time on their hands read all this extra crap into it and was complaining to a mutual friend of ours that I was "loudly talking about how to pick up on girls". (Which is funny because I know damn well that I did NO such thing.)

So honestly, worrying about what people think is worthless because they will come up with a ton of shit on their own, regardless of what you say.

TaGrey · 2014-06-19T16:42:12+00:00

Enjoy that bro-jealousy! You're making the smart decision, stick to it. They are young and too immature to handle you bettering yourself. Haha, jokes on them. You'll be a master in the sack and they'll be still humping away like idiots thinking that makes the woman feel good (if they even care at all about her).

alex0919 · 2014-06-19T17:48:18+00:00

Because this guy has a harem of VS models?

Look at the people laughing at you, who are they? Probably nothing compared to what you're learning to be. Ignore it. They're just jealous and wish they had the integrity to do this, I got made fun of until I was successful. Then everyone keeps asking man you need to give me a few tips on girls, and I just smile at them and don't give away anything.

sharkacolypse · 2014-06-19T18:27:05+00:00

They're 18, they don't know anything.

TheDudeness33 · 2014-06-19T19:39:48+00:00

Fuck them. That's them being rude and childish. Try to be the bigger, more mature person

biggyb92 · 2014-06-19T20:19:13+00:00

In the immortal words of Dr. Suess

"Those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind."

It's your life to live and if pick up makes you happy. Keep it up just make sure your not doing it for the validation of others.

Personally I see pick/seduction as a tool of communication and a way to give value to others. While finding beautiful, confident and high status women that make me happy. Pick up not only gave me the strength to meet women but it gave me the greatest reflection of myself. Empowering me with confidence and vulnerability. My friends and family know that I do pickup and they are happy with it. Because they know my intentions behind it. And they support me. In the past (I started learning pick up at 17) I've had a few people judge me hard on practicing pickup. Calling me out when I would show interest in girls. Saying that what I'm learning is horrible and manipulative. But none of that compared to this one situation in university. When one of my friends found out that I practiced pickup she hated me so much that she would talk to the women I was with. About how I was a manipulative asshole that doesn't treat women with respect and the only reason why I was with them was to just get in their pants. But at the end of the day what she said never effected the women I was with and once I found out it was her I dropped her cause I don't want or need someone like that in my life. I knew why I was practicing pickup and what I wanted to achieve. So the shit that she said had no affect on me or the women I was with.

In reality intentions resonate beyond words.

So if you enjoy pickup keep on learning. And if you get teased because of it. Just know your on a path few had gone through but many will thank you.

noisycicada · 2014-06-19T20:22:53+00:00

Own up and joke it off so you can casually dismiss it

OR

Tell your friends to fuck off. Go be awesome somewhere else.

My_name_isOzymandias · 2014-06-19T21:11:08+00:00

This is another learning opportunity. A chance to better hone your social skills. Don't listen to the comments telling you to give up on your friends because they're teasing you. You need to figure out a way to get them to stop teasing you about it. Maybe you join them and poke fun at yourself too. Maybe you show them that it's actually working for you, and brag about your success. Maybe you find something you can tease them back for. You can try multiple approaches to find which works best because they are already your friends. They aren't likely to expel you being a jerk for a day.

That said, in my personal experience, it's easiest to tease someone about something they are embarrassed/self conscious about. My approach would be to join them. Here's a good example of the sort of thing I mean. Someone makes a bad joke about his nose, he responds with many better jokes about his nose. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=urdf4g-LXk4 Now everyone is on his side.

As an aside; I think there are a lot of people here who don't understand how the casual observer/outsider views the seduction community. I think a lot of observers think of it as neckbeards who want to run there own version of this. Or to put it differently, socially inept young men who want to become sleazy misogynists who trick women into having sex with them. Now I know all of you are going to say, that's not what the community is really about. But the other problem is that when you say that, this is what it sounds like to the outsider. /End Rant

STylerMLmusic · 2014-06-20T00:08:02+00:00

Funny thing is they're playing the same game, you're just bothering to learn the rules.

DlmaoC · 2014-06-20T03:53:10+00:00

My circle of friends give me shit for trying to help them in pick-up because I'm a fat dude whose never had a GF telling them how to get girls. So I decided to game recently and it was eh, more success than I ever got not gaming though. They still give me shit for it. It's weird as fuck and sort of creepy, but to put it in perspective. Gaming is seeing a girl you find physically attractive and approaching her to see if you two are mentally compatible. When you get to the basics gaming is the only way to get a girl that you wanna be with. So don't give a fuck what people are saying about it, giving a fuck will just hurt your gaming anyways. Talk to the girls you wanna talk to, learn the game, and run laps around them when it comes to meeting girls.

2014-06-19T21:35:30+00:00

Time to get new friends.

Sounds like they're holding you back anyway. Fuck them.

Akasho1 · 2014-06-19T17:39:58+00:00

Dude people mock things they can't do...u have already decided to do something that is not conventional..not normal...u r a rare breed....be proud of that....

Aznblaze · 2014-06-19T19:39:12+00:00

Hey I'm 18 too and started bein in the seddit community few months ago. Recently got laid and topped off. I've had friends tease me about how bad I was at flirting and talking to women. Keep trying and learning man, but don't let it consume you. Keep doing your hobbies and passions, you'll eventually get a girl and score ^{__^}

Terakahn · 2014-06-19T19:39:50+00:00

if it were me, I just wouldn't give a shit. They're ridiculing you for trying to learn a new skill that can potentially change the way you live your life for the better? Do you know how that sounds? When I first started learning it, I told my friends. Some joked about it, but my real friends supported it. Mind you I've developed a thick skin over the years so none of it really bothered me. But really, you have to KNOW you're doing this to better yourself. When you know that, it doesn't matter what anyone says about it.

The community in general has a very negative stigma in the world, and a lot of people view it as manipulation or whatever else. Just uneducated people putting down things they dont understand.

iamthesage · 2014-06-19T20:43:14+00:00

Fuck them.

The question you need to ask yourself.

Which path do I choose? Do I choose the normal path like everyone else - a life of mediocre existence.

Or a path of evolving and growing as the man you were meant to be? The path of constant improvement. A path that gives you options with women, career and your goals?

You make the choice.

sedditforthewin · 2014-06-19T21:05:11+00:00

Get out of that bucket, no need to chill around crabs.

Learn to dish it back out, if that doesn't shut them up and they still try to pull you down don't hang out with them.

Modern_Drummer · 2014-06-19T21:10:09+00:00

I am 18 year old and my classmates know that I'm a "gamer", sometimes they even try to " tease" me.

And you know what? 18 is a good age for changing your social circle. Find buddies who are also into game/self-improvement and hang out with them. You should also realize that sometimes it's needed to "filter" your social circle.

You don't need those who try to tease you because of envy (funny thing is, they are envy because of your DESIRE to change, not results). They are only dragging you back, so drop the ballast. This has helped me a lot.

Lindofrindo · 2014-06-19T22:07:49+00:00

Sadly, our communtiy has formed social expectations, norms and rules that you should just know how to get women from the start. They dont know that this art has to be learned, just like anything else. And like other people said: Don´t really talk with people outside of pickup about it. They just don´t get it if they dont have the same way of thinking as we do.

Im forever happy that I discovered forums like this who helped me see all of this from a whole new perspective. I learned that girls and being comfortable in social situations is EASY and NO BIG DEAL. It has basically changed my life.

Get yourself some friends who knows what this is all about or maybe try meeting someone from the sub if you can. Go out, have fun and fuck chicks.

2014-06-19T22:30:42+00:00

Even after only 2 weeks in the community, you should know by now that type of negativity is one of the first things you shed when you start working on your game, both inner and outer. It's a game. Think of yourself as on offense and haters are on defense. Don't huddle with the defense.

ThePUA_Baddie · 2014-06-19T22:40:05+00:00

Sounds pretty stupid that this happened. If your social circle found out that you were going out during the day or night to talk to cute girls that you see and they ridicule you for that then get new friends. Friends should accept you and what you do. Just think about what you're actually doing, going out to try and meet some new girls. There's nothing wrong with that, and if these guys can't handle that you're making a change then stop talking to them or just stop talking about pickup around them if you really feel they're worth keeping around.

husgutt · 2014-06-19T22:50:29+00:00

I just want you to know that I WISH I started this at your age. You're going to learn so much about yourself. It took me too long to be comfortable around people I admired. Or "cool" people. Now I feel so much more free and it is all thanks to my journey. Pick up taught me about social psychology that I bring with me to work and all aspects of my life. If I want to say something, I finally have the courage to speak my mind, and people respond well to it.

I wished I knew about this world when I was studying. At UNI there are so many people eager to explore life, themselves and their sexuality. So much life and fun, and I was one of them that kept to myself in the jungle. I was the boring one wanting, but not knowing how to express myself.

Please, pay no attention to what they say. Have fun, learn, experience and meet amazing people. You do not want to go through these years knowing what could have happened if you had ignored those guys. Ignore them and start your adventure.

2014-06-19T23:33:01+00:00

This post reminds me of what this guy was trying to do to Owen. Hilariously misguided.

the_brick_attack · 2014-06-20T01:30:59+00:00

Yes, this happens to a lot of people. It's because our culture doesn't recognize that men have to learn anything about sexuality.

Also, they are complete tools if they won't support you in wanting to change. I've gone back and forth with pick-up because of culture and friends, but ultimately, I just have to accept that I like working on myself.

dcthebrohan · 2014-06-20T04:00:57+00:00

Whatever shit they give you will pale in comparison to the amount of pussy you will eventually be drowning in.

Jake_STi-RA · 2014-06-20T06:04:27+00:00

Why are you getting teased? Because the face value of seduction is cheesy at best. Seriously, when people say "pick up" the first thing that pops into people's heads are cheesy pick up lines ("pick up lines" are part of pop culture), being a loud obnoxious asshole, or being a stereotypical frat boy.

Obviously, from a lot of the articles and stories here, one can tell the ulterior motive is a good one.

Besides, which sounds better "I'm learning to improve myself" or "I'm learning how to get women"? Just saying.

I don't tell myself that I practice or practiced 'pick up.' In fact, I hardly tell ANYONE what I do in terms of self-improvement other than CLOSE friends. You know that saying, be like a duck; above the surface be calm and collected but below, paddle like fucking crazy.

I don't brag (when I can) and I don't tell the jealous people or the assholes. The latter is perfect, because I'm being naturally humble and the ones that are jealous and non understanding perpetuate their own asshole behavior, making it more self-evident. Psychological Judo if you will.

DrGrey17 · 2014-06-20T14:23:36+00:00

Dude, f**k what anyone thinks. You are on a journey of self-improvement. Get used to people ridiculing/teasing/hating because many people are so spiritually poor they have no way of understanding what drives you. Brush that dirt off your shoulders and keep marching on soldier! And thats a command.

Gallows9 · 2014-06-20T18:56:27+00:00

I have introduced quite a few to the seduction community. Nearly every one of them tried to tease me about it. Then they would feel bad about it on the car ride home when there's a model on my lap and they're going home to their hand.

I've found that men tend to be 100% wrong about two things. Their ability to win in a fight, and pick up women. That's why you should practice both of these.

highhopes01 · 2014-06-21T09:39:48+00:00

Don't sweat it. The biggest part of self improvement is not giving a shit what others think of you. You are doing this for you.

I told my two close friends I read 'The Game' out of curiosity. I recommended the book to them just for the exposure to another world and the development of one man. I told my friends I was interested and was going to learn more about pickup. Some of it was out there and it makes a lot of sense. My friend who works as a trainer gave me some shit about it, he also gets the most girls out of our group.

I now give him shit for not being confident enough to approach women. He expects girls to approach him. He limits himself and misses out on a lot of girls he could have had, if he would just have some balls. I also go out with him because it boosts me as the alpha male if this shy muscular guy is following me around instead of acting how a guy that looks like he does should.

It is typically best to not tell anyone who is not a close friend. Study your friends behaviors and identify things you've learned on here.

jzell3 · 2014-06-21T21:43:46+00:00

To put it simply they are hating on you. Friends dont like seeing you change because it doesnt fit into what they are comfortable with. You play a certain role that they are going want to stay the same. If they cant accept the new you then find new ones.

2014-06-19T14:45:33+00:00

Tease them back, laugh at them for thinking having an amazing dating life is a bad thing. Tell him there are lots of guys in the community that bang 2,3,4 different girls a week applying these things. Or, tell them about the self-improvement angle. All the good things it does for your non-romantic relationships and success in the work place are equally incredible.

thetinguy · 2014-06-20T04:27:13+00:00

Nah, because i am not in high school.

Koebs · 2014-06-19T16:36:27+00:00

Because it's worthy of ridicule? How do y'all not understand this?

Title	Im getting 'teased' for trying to learn?
Author	arghhhhhhhhhhhhh
Upvotes	53
Comments	78
Date	June 19, 2014 2:22 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/28jwzv/im_getting_teased_for_trying_to_learn/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/im-getting-teased-for-trying-to-learn.1372353 https://theredarchive.com/post/1372353

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