What are your deal breakers, also does body count matter to you?

Orange_Paisley · 2022-02-26T19:24:22+00:00

Racism, homophobia, gun nut, poor hygiene, doesn’t like or respect women, facial tattoos, criminal record, constantly broke or asking for money. Edit: N count doesn’t matter to me too much.

RicoGemini · 2022-02-26T19:21:53+00:00

I think people who say body count absolutely doesn’t matter are a bit unrealistic. I think everyone has a number that’s like “uhh nah I’m good”

With that being said I don’t want a virgin. I don’t want have to spend time teaching you how to do shit. I want a woman with experience so when we get in the bed we can get to work.

KekeSmall · 2022-02-26T21:20:17+00:00

My dealbreakers *Overly macho/mean attitude or demeanor *How does he treat other people and women whom he’s not attracted to? *Does he Monkey Branch from girl to girl, relationship to relationship? *Does he care about his own sexual health? Does he insist on a condom? Does he voluntarily get himself tested without being prompted? *Does he respect a woman’s right to say no, even if she withdraws consent? Does he manipulate, pressure, or coerce (throw tantrums) for sex?

I can go on but my point is I care more for the quality of his previous relationships as opposed to the quantity.

PMmeareasontolive · 2022-02-26T22:40:09+00:00

If our personalities were well matched, which is unfortunately too rare, for me to be concerned about n count would be impossibly prissy.

wtknight · 2022-02-26T19:19:36+00:00

I care about a woman's attitude towards casual sex, not N count per se. If she has a casual sex past, then she and I aren't compatible, because I don't have a casual sex past, and I find the entire idea pretty repulsive.

If she had a casual sex past and regretted it, I'm not sure how I'd react since I've never had this happen in real life, but women who are proud of their casual sex past would definitely be a next for me.

TheFieldAgent · 2022-02-26T20:11:47+00:00

Every post every day is about body counts smh

cowfishAreReal · 2022-02-26T19:19:51+00:00

I don't give a fuck about body count.

Some of my deal breakers are: smoking, drinking, being conservative, being more than 3 years older or younger than me, not having any interests in common, being too muscular, being too fat...

lonely_mixtape · 2022-02-26T19:15:44+00:00

If she has slept with anyone I know personally, like if she used to smash my best friend even if it was casually, I'm not tryna wife her, no judgement but just can't do it.

Curious about this one. What's the reasoning here. No judgement coming from me either, just curious. Currently dating one of my close friend's exes so it piqued my interest.

flapperfemmefatale · 2022-02-26T20:19:28+00:00

Body count isn't important to me.

Deal breakers:

Must not have or want kids.

Must be cool living in an urban area.

Must be socially progressive, especially on issues regarding gender and sexuality.

Must not expect me to practice whatever religion they do.

Must not be stereotypically masculine.

hemaristhysbe · 2022-02-26T19:23:12+00:00

Irrational thinking like conspiracy theories, anti-science, etc. OCD, fetishes, heavy substance abuse.

EviessVeralan · 2022-02-26T20:16:46+00:00

These were the main dealbreakers I had when i was single

-if he engaged in casual sex or had a body count above 3

-not wanting marriage or kids

-having any kind of std

-if he dated any of my friends

-different political ideology

-being 10+ years older than me

-not liking reptiles

-not being tolerant of hobbies.

-lack of hygiene

PlayfulLawyer · 2022-02-26T19:40:49+00:00

I'm not as hung up on body count as most guys, like I said on the thread the other day, a certain amount within a period of time might make me raise an eyebrow like for example if I'm dating someone who's 19 and she's already been with 15 to 20 guys, I'm going to make a note of that, if she is 35 and been with 15 to 20 guys I really don't give a shit

As far as other deal-breakers, I'll just list 10 that disqualify a woman for long-term relationships with me

Being a feminist, I understand most women these days are going to be infected with that feminist virus to an extent but on a scale from 1 to 10 if her feminism is like more than like a two or three, she's got to go
Being significantly overweight / fat, I fucked fat women before and had a great time but that's for short-term , just in general if a woman doesn't take her physical fitness seriously like I do it's not going to work
uncleanliness / unhygienic, I'm not going to act like I'm OCD or anything but I keep my house clean, I don't like messes I don't like cleaning up after people and obviously wash your ass, not just the ass, you must wash the asshole
libido's not matching / lack of sexual experimentation, I don't care what anybody says sex, sexual intimacy, romantic intimacy is what separates a relationship from just a really good friendship, I like fucking, I like to do it often , and here's a tip for all of you if you are going to do the marriage/ long-term relationship thing make sure you actually desire the person to the best of your abilities, if you don't get hard / wet just thinking about them, they ain't the one. And I'm not going to operate with a whole bunch of limits on what we can't do sexually, despite people thinking that it's shallow and some of those people who stick around for years in that deadbedrooms subreddit, contrary to popular belief not having your sexual needs and desires met by your partner is a perfectly valid reason to end a relationship
having significant debt , no I'm not going to pay off all your student loans just because you throw it back real nice, don't be coming to me because you maxed out trying to fuck up my credit lol
Dating a career woman, I have no problem dating a woman with a career but I will not date a career woman, there's a big difference, as far as specific careers no cops or active military
Being a smoker , I don't want to smell it, I don't want it getting into my clothes, fucking up your breath, etc.,

And of course there's other relationship deal-breakers that are commonplace like cheating, STDs, big mental issues etc.,

greedyleopard42 · 2022-02-27T00:51:42+00:00

the guys who say ALL men care a lot about n count are real silent here😳

giddy-girly-banana · 2022-02-26T20:13:06+00:00

Don’t care about body count. Don’t care who she’s slept with. As long as she doesn’t give me any STIs. If anything I like a girl who knows what she’s doing and enjoys sex.

Vtridolla · 2022-02-26T19:11:36+00:00

I couldn’t give less of a shit about body count. I just need respect, openness, honesty, humble, and a woman with a backbone who isn’t cowardice. Oh also have your own things going on I love a busy woman.

Also if you speak español and the booty sits nice it’s a plus plus,

januaryphilosopher · 2022-02-26T19:13:03+00:00

body count personally doesn't, but what about you all?

When committing >0 is too much

Otherwise ♾️for all I care

januaryphilosopher · 2022-02-26T19:19:09+00:00

Feminist or feminist ally, not an extremist, no porn, no children, can be trusted, no casual sex and a lot of failed relationships is also a red flag, no lying or manipulative behaviour, nothing that's a potential warning sign for any kind of abuse, dates seriously rather than casually, within a couple of years of my age, no drug use besides alcohol, isn't like bottom 10% in looks, has at least passed A Levels, isn't dominant and doesn't want to be, monogamous.

figuringMylife · 2022-02-26T19:45:19+00:00

omg. i’m so so so nice but i’m ngl i’m not even hood but i find myself accidentally doing 4 sometimes. i cannot date a fucking doormat.

i will probably never date another single father unless he’s pretty exceptional. i love kids and it fucking hurts to be separated because i will love his kids like they’re mine.

idc about body count. i’ll date a virgin or a manwhore. deal breakers: doesn’t want kids, doesn’t want serious commitment, not loyal, not compatible, not willing to communicate, not a fighter, not capable of taking care of themselves/a family

LittyKitsune · 2022-02-26T20:13:42+00:00

The deal breakers can basically be summed up as DBAD- don't be a dick.

I prefer to date virgins.

Neptune-Jr · 2022-02-26T19:43:37+00:00

You kind of contradict yourself

Why would I judge someone for having sex or lack of sex, it's their body

If she has slept with anyone I know personally, like if she used to smash my best friend even if it was casually, I'm not tryna wife her, no judgement but just can't do it.

But My deal breakers are:

Racist (I'm black so not really gonna work at all)
Is a prostitute
Bad hygiene
Severely Mentally ill
Does drugs
is violent
is older than me by 12 years
is younger than me by 5 year

Thats all I can't think of. For the body count thing, I wouldn't instantly dump someone I was really liking because of a high body count unless it was unnaturally high like 30+ dudes. It's a preference to want a low body count woman but it's not the end of the world if she ticks a bunch of other boxes and I like her company.

BottedeNevers · 2022-02-26T20:11:42+00:00

The amount of men a woman sleeps with is not that much of a deal breaker: if they have all been good or upstanding men but it hasn't worked out for whatever reason with any of them then it's not dealbreaker. But if she is attracted to manifest assholes or bad boys or worse, foolish enough to have a relationship with one them - that's a definite deal breaker: Its a huge red flag that her bullshit radar is way off:

https://slatestarcodex.com/2014/08/31/radicalizing-the-romanceless/

If she has had a confident or charming 'Henry' in her life then dodge the bullet, save yourself a lot of grief and next her immediatly.

luv_ya · 2022-02-26T20:18:54+00:00

Deal breakers: not religious/can’t cook good food/ doesn’t maintain body or health/ not family-oriented/ doesn’t want at least 3+ kids/ single mothers/tattoos/old/uses a limited amount of social media(so no tiktok/insta/snap)/doesn’t value education/shorter than 5’6/also have to be attracted to her

Body count matters to me. Repeated sexual encounters interfere with long term pair bonding because the brain is used to short term pleasure.

Quality of life of those had a promiscuous past was much lower and they’re relationships were more likely to fail

imgur.com/a/j4xHC11

lout_zoo · 2022-02-27T01:12:34+00:00

Body count doesn't matter.
Biggest quick dealbreaker is I don't date women who get their nails done. Although to be honest I've never dated or been interested in anyone who has their nails done, so it's never been an issue.
Anyone who is either impressed or cares about what kind of car I own, other than liking an electric for ecological reasons.
Last person I dated was very successful and I was really impressed that she wore jeans and tshirts and owned an old tiny pickup. Most women in her position would drive something like a Lexus and wear designer clothes. Also she rode motorcycles.
edit: any racism, bigotry. I thought it was too obvious to mention.

Mogu__ · 2022-02-27T04:50:05+00:00

My initial gut feeling was to say "to at least some degree body count must matter right?". Yet the more I think about it the more it just seems illogical. I know the typical argument is that because it's so much easier for women to have sex that it matters more if they've had more sex. But that just feels like you're begging the question. "You having more sex matters because you can have more sex easier" I mean it really stems from a place of insecurity does it not? Tons of people enjoy and want to have sex. I acknowledge that it sucks for those who struggle to get it when they want it but that doesn't make it ok to want to restrict (through shame or even legality for the incels) those who can get it. I'd say the only potential downside is that there is some evidence indicating that people (men and women) with more sexual partners are more likely to cheat in relationships. Although I never ask what a chicks body count is anyway and "more likely" doesn't mean "for sure will" so I don't care much.

Deal breakers are pretty straightforward: lack of common interest, bad hygiene, bigotry, rudeness, ego, inability to hold a conversation, needy, hates physical touch (like cuddling), annoying voice, engages in 0 physical activity, far more male than female friends, lack of common sense, anything right of a moderate politically, unwillingness to try new things, not wanting kids, multiple short term failed relationships, anything more than an occasional drinker, smoking cigarettes, hates pizza, and last but not least if they're named Nicole.

SwimmingTheme3736 · 2022-02-27T09:04:19+00:00

Body count not important

Violence, hating women, racism homophobia, any type of criminal record that’s recent or to do with sex violence or children.

Redpillisposion · 2022-02-26T21:07:49+00:00

Deal breakers: a smoker, does drugs( incliding marijuana), a felon, not a white man , doesn't have a white collar job, not tall, play video games, narcissistic, Trump supporter, bad hygiene, does not know how to cook, not a Christian, a cheater, has a body count more than 3.

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notsofriendlygirl · 2022-02-26T21:33:14+00:00

Statistically it’s just not likely someone that fucked 100 ppl has no STDs

ThrowawayYAYAY2002 · 2022-02-26T22:00:51+00:00

Each go their own, but not giving two hoots about body count is just asking for trouble down the road.

If she doesn't have a father figure in her life, takes drugs, tells lies, takes meds or has multiple children, isnt feminine... these are just some of my deal breakers.

Siukslinis_acc · 2022-02-26T22:42:54+00:00

Smoking, not being able to live without fish, overconsumption of alcohol, vulgar, can't be around cat, and probably something else that didn't pop up in my mind at this moment.

Body count does not matter.

account892 · 2022-02-26T23:26:28+00:00

Number count doesn’t matter too much (as long as I believe he’d be faithful when we’re ready). Religious is a dealbreaker, wanting kids is a deal breaker (and I guess all the obvious ones like arrogant, disrespectful, criminal background). I’ve been dating some divorced guys though (I’m 26) and while that’s not a deal breaker for me I am very wary about people that have cheated in previous relationships.

unfknblvbe · 2022-02-27T00:16:03+00:00

Shitty person in general, manipulative or rude to others, and body count would matter a bit

somefellaUK · 2022-02-27T00:24:18+00:00

My main dealbreakers for a girl:

- If she has obviously noticeable hair on her top lip. That's the biggest physical turnoff for me by far. I've lost all sexual attraction to some girls based on that.

- If she's unhygienic and doesn't wash her vag fairly frequently

- If she has a lot of male friends

- If she doesn't exercise / take her health seriously

Those are the main ones for me tbh.

WholeCelebration4567 · 2022-02-27T00:40:28+00:00

I don’t want a girl that’s been ran through lol. Also I leave politics out of dating unlike most women in these comments

tempaccc2022 · 2022-02-27T01:10:32+00:00

ive changed my perspective on this and yes it now matters to me. i prefer someone inexperienced who I can teach things and its all new to them

KamuiObito · 2022-02-27T01:23:54+00:00

Body count is directly tied to whether or not the relationship is gonna last or not and or toxicity

_-One4All-_ · 2022-02-27T02:36:27+00:00

Deal breakers include that she has been previously penetrated by a man, has a lot of tattoos, aggressive mannerisms, argumentative, overweight, or older than 25

techr0nin · 2022-02-27T04:57:45+00:00

Besides the obvious ones like cheating and STDs, being overweight is a dealbreaker for me.

And no I don’t care about n-counts in absolute terms, but I do care somewhat about how those n-counts were accumulated. Like if these were actual, legitimate relationships, or is she out there fucking randos on weekends. High n-count is not a dealbreaker per se, but I do see it as a red flag proportional to the count.

qfinesser21 · 2022-02-27T06:07:09+00:00

Here on this post is a prime example of women lying about what they want. Never ask women advice about dating as my aunt says. "We are definitely not telling YOU the truth"

dbz19 · 2022-02-27T07:31:29+00:00

My one and only actual deal-breaker is being a non-virgin. I just can't do it. I've tried to convince myself, but I just can't.

Oh and she obviously has to want marriage or children. It just wouldn't work otherwise since we'd be on completely different pages in terms of our plan for life.

And yes body count does obviously matter to me lol

JollyRoger66689 · 2022-02-27T08:49:57+00:00

A high body count tends to make put them in the "not serious" category. Judging by stats and just my own personal experiences (which even if you think it is wrong it is still my experience and would need a better reason than a random person online telling me I shouldn't think like that to make me change my mind) it really stacks the odds towards them being a certain way that would make me not want to marry them.

Physically abusive, I assume these things don't tend to just randomly end by themselves and seems like it would heighten the chances of me being the one to end up in jail eventually.

Racist, im a minority with family of different races, would never work..... though is it weird that I do have kind of a fantasy of just going to town on some racist chick? Sounds kind of hot hahaha.

More than 1 kid (probably them having kids in general, made that mistake already).

When it seems like they are trying to find a man to serve a purpose like taking care of them or helping them with kids (same woman as the point above). They aren't looking for love, they are looking to exploit.

And some red flags that aren't necessarily deal breakers... talking like a guy, only having guy friends, too involved in social media, posting provocative photos online, theme of all their exes being horrible/abusive (probably either lying or into the wrong type of guys, either way its no good), ghetto, self-described/vocal feminist (its like the female version of "nice guy"), talking about how "real men" should act (and it conveniently usually being good for them and a bad deal for the man), and being too muscular (not a red flag, just a turn off).

Pickle_Juice_Can · 2022-02-27T10:33:21+00:00

My deal breaker is any n count above 0. I want to be her first

thetruthishere_ · 2022-02-27T16:25:35+00:00

Bottom line, drunk/druggie and cant keep a job.

People that cant keep a stable job wont be a stable partner.

Jakes1967 · 2022-02-27T21:03:07+00:00

What are your deal breakers:

They included

Tattoos
Intimate piercings
Bad hygiene
Bad attitude
Modern feminists

also does body count matter to you?

Yes and no.

The number depends on age, but her attitude towards sex was more important and the circumstances around the number.

OfCatandPagan · 2022-02-28T01:49:24+00:00

Dealbreakers: Incest fetish or kink, racist, abuses animals (including ones seen a vermin), sexist, horrendous hygiene, you have kids, homophobic, you have a bunch of children with a bunch of different women, history of unprovoked violence (meaning you broke some kid's arm because they existed near you vs broke a kid's arm for trying to rob you), lack of empathy you have a bunch of women's names tattooed on you and they aren't relatives but exes, selfish, history of abusing children, lazy, can't take care of themselves, asshole, has an STD or history of catching STDs, has an unhealthy interest in minors.

Kids aren't an extreme dealbreaker but ffs they better not be insufferable brats and know how to behave.

gopher_glitz · 2022-02-28T16:22:58+00:00

Promiscuous behavior definitely matters, near guarantee to cheat.

Do you know how weird it is to put in so much work into a relationship in order to have sex knowing she's fucked guys she didn't even know?

Anti_Thing · 2022-03-01T02:58:47+00:00

Certain deal breakers should go without saying, such as having poor hygiene, being rude, having a history of abuse, lying, or promiscuity, or not meeting a certain threshold of physical attractiveness.
Body count definitely matters to me, though I'm not sure where I'd draw the line. I prefer virgins; I'd be willing to date someone who isn't a virgin but I'm not sure we could work out in the long run. It would probably be a deal breaker if she'd ever had an abortion or engaged in casual sex, sex work, or any particularly degrading or kinky sex.
I'm not willing to date a single mom unless perhaps she's a widow, & even then I think I'd have to be a lot older to consider it.
She must be against racism & extreme ideologies or organizations such as Nazism, Communism, Critical Race Theory, ANTIFA, or BLM. Opposition to homosexuality is a must as well. She must ultimately be OK with me safely & legally owning a large amount of firearms at some point in the future, though that's something I wouldn't bring up early in the relationship & something I would try to calmly & rationally explain to her. It's necessary that she have a default attitude of respect towards others, especially towards authority figures. Looking down on people who are working class or don't have a college degree is a deal breaker. Significant tattooing is a deal breaker, though I'm not sure where I'd draw the line. She must be a hard worker & frugal with money.
Centering her identity around anything or anyone other than Jesus Christ is the biggest deal breaker. Under no circumstances am I willing to date a non-Christian. My other deal breakers are mostly things that I believe go against Christ's teachings. Being Catholic or Orthodox would definitely be a deal breaker, though I'm not sure how far I'd be willing to go in terms of different Protestant denominations. I have a strong preference for Baptists, Pentecostals, Charismatics, or non-denominational Christians. Cultural Christianity isn't enough; she must be genuinely devout & fully sincere in her faith, putting the faith above literally everything else, including me or her own family.
She must acknowledge that the husband should be the head of the household. It's also a deal breaker if she thinks people have the right to deny sex to their spouse for an extended period of time, though obviously I would only bring that up as tactfully as possible several months into the relationship. (Genuinely chaste women tend to be uncomfortable talking about sex; it's not good to discuss such things too much before marriage.) She must be willing to have an absolute minimum of 2 kids (immediately after marriage if she's 25 or older by the time we get married, though I'm willing to wait a little if she's younger), & generally be enthusiastic about having kids.
Other deal breakers include any recreational use of tobacco or recreational smoking of any other sort (unless perhaps it's only done occasionally & in small quantities), any recreational use of marijuana (except for non-psychoactive CBD extracts) or hard drugs, or any drunkenness. Social liberalism in general is a deal breaker. She must believe in the gender binary & be against all sexuality outside of heterosexual marriage.
She must be accepting of & non-judgmental towards those who aren't vaccinated against Covid-19, & in general must not be too hung up on masks mandates or other Covid-19 restrictions.
2nd or 3rd wave feminism are deal breakers. She must be grateful for the men in her life & see masculinity & femininity as things to be cherished. She must be willing to sacrifice her worldly aspirations for the sake of our family.
She must be proud of her ethnicity in a healthy way. If her native language isn't English, I want our kids to learn that language.

2022-02-26T20:18:04+00:00

Deal-Breakers:

Masculine energy, over-emotional, engages in shaming language, shitty friends, over 120 lbs, previously married, has kids, debts (student loans, car payments, credit card debt) exceeding 10K, bullshit college degree. Those are all the ones I can think of right now.

Body count matters because past behavior is the best indicator of future behavior. You fuck a lot of dudes, I'm probably just next in line and I'm just getting up in them guts and moving on like every previous guy has.

Title	What are your deal breakers, also does body count matter to you?
Author	thoughtfulsoul10000
Upvotes	7
Comments	172
Date	February 26, 2022 7:07 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/t24j0a/what_are_your_deal_breakers_also_does_body_count/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/what-are-your-deal-breakers-also-does-body-count.1102766 https://theredarchive.com/post/1102766

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