If simping worked most men would do it

Meekzzy · 2026-04-18T18:00:18+00:00

Can you define what you mean by simping here exactly? Seems like any behavior excluding being an outright asshole gets you written off as a simp online.

Gravel_Roads · 2026-04-18T17:59:30+00:00

What do you mean by simping/simps? Cuz I’ve seen it used to describe anything from “man stuck in the friendzone who does anything for a girl who isn’t even dating him” all the way down to “if you think your wife loves you, you’re a simp.”

Corbast7 · 2026-04-18T17:59:50+00:00

But red pillers in here say all the time that most men ARE simps, and that that’s why dating is the way that it is. Are simps a minority now?

Also the logic in this post feels like a just world fallacy. If anything “most” men do is perfectly justified, then you’d need to apply the same logic to women. And I don’t think y’all would like that.

TermAggravating8043 · 2026-04-18T17:58:36+00:00

I’m curious what you think “used and abused” means here.

If your friend was literally getting battered I would hope you would help him and get this person locked up. If you mean he was expected to be an adult and respect her etc then I question why you think this is abusive

lesliecarbone · 2026-04-18T18:00:26+00:00

INFO: What are some examples of "simping"?

Outside_Memory5703 · 2026-04-18T18:00:32+00:00

Most men do use it. That’s exactly what red pill/conservatism complains about — betabuxing

Tylikcat · 2026-04-18T18:38:47+00:00

I keep on hearing that all the educated young men I know who are settling down and getting married must be simps and... if so, it seems to work well for them?

MarioWilson122 · 2026-04-19T07:17:08+00:00

That is too simplistic. Men are not just neutral robots reacting to female incentives. Men also shape the market by what they tolerate, reward, chase, and normalize. A lot of bad male behavior is not just “women made me do it.” Some of it is men taking the easy route, copying short-term tactics, and then dressing it up as pure adaptation.

It is true that people respond to incentives, but that cuts both ways. Men often say simping fails, but plenty of men still overinvest for women they have not earned access to. Men say they hate being used, yet many still lead with money, attention, and validation. That is not just women shaping behavior. That is men choosing weak strategies and then blaming the environment for the outcome.

The real point is that dating is an interaction, not a one-way reaction. Women influence male behavior, sure, but men also create the conditions they complain about by rewarding the wrong things, lacking standards, and refusing discipline. So no, it is not just “men are doing what works.” A lot of men are doing what is easiest, then calling it strategy after the fact.

incogmytho · 2026-04-18T18:38:36+00:00

Simping doesn’t work just like being a pick me doesn’t work. People with no boundaries don’t get good results. The problem is too many conflate acting decently with being a simp.

ThatBitchA · 2026-04-18T18:09:03+00:00

If your friend is being abused, I hope you're contacting the authorities.

Outside of that, I'm not sure what simping even looks like. There's zero consensus.

pie-mart · 2026-04-18T18:12:08+00:00

Can you define simping and define what you mean by a man being used and abused

mobjack · 2026-04-18T18:35:30+00:00

I find that women like it when I do nice things for them.

The key is to match their energy. Let things build up naturally and don't overdo it especially in the beginning.

Lemon_gecko · 2026-04-18T19:31:16+00:00

we should pretend that men are rational? How about incels - does that work? What about black pill? What about those losers who identify themselves as red pillers but not in any way successful?

The thing is it is all depends on your definition of "simping". I've seen men define someone who try to win attraction by gifts when a woman is clearly uninterested. And i've also seen it defined as simple expression of emotions that he likes her.

wtknight · 2026-04-18T22:01:51+00:00

Most of the men whom I know in successful marriages, including myself, did put in some kind of effort into their initial relationships that bitter, cynical young men would probably claim is "simping". The definition of simping in my opinion is putting effort into attracting a woman who has little to no interest. "Simping" does work when the woman does have interest and when she has enough self-respect to expect the man to put in an effort to return that interest.

Being an uninterested asshole only works when the man is so far above the woman in quality that he can get away with doing it, or when the woman has psychological problems that results in her having a lack of respect. These types of situations are not ideal for relationships and are only ideal for short-term sexual arrangements for these men. So it makes sense that the men who only want these types of arrangements might believe that "simping" does not work

Mud_Blossom · 2026-04-18T18:01:04+00:00

Nah.

This idea that most men bring video game strat tactics to dating only applies to a minority of men who are more interested in having any relationship than in having the relationships that they specifically want.

Secret_Entry1840 · 2026-04-18T19:28:14+00:00

Define “simping” and “used and abused” please. Can you give a few examples?

GGMcThroway · 2026-04-18T20:38:22+00:00

If simping worked, men would try and gaslight women into believing they (the men) are simping. Men wouldn't actually simp.

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Just-Path-5838 · 2026-04-18T18:19:37+00:00

I think most men do simp though, its all they can do. What women call "love bombing" is basically the only weapon in the arsenal for most. For most men women are going to wait around for them to take it slow, or treat them as an option

AlvaroXZ999 · 2026-04-18T20:54:34+00:00

The majority of simps I've seen are pathetic. So I don't know what simping exactly means here :/

Jonesdm5 · 2026-04-18T22:10:36+00:00

News flash- most men simp. Yea including your favorites behind close doors. They are lying to yall.

Financial-Put6034 · 2026-04-19T15:43:47+00:00

Here's the thing though: simping is a viable strategy.

Simping works for men who cannot use other strategies. If everybody could be a 6'3" muscled-out penis machine then everyone would be a 6'3" muscled-out penis machine.

Unfortunately the God that rules the heavens has seen fit to divide sexual attraction unevenly among men.

Men who don't have the tools to employ more effective strategies have to do what they can and what they've got, and simping is simply a way to trade resources for sexual access.

It may not be the most effective strategy, It may not be a long-term strategy, It might even be a bit embarrassing... But if it didn't work there would be no simps.

DGenerationMC · 2026-04-20T23:07:01+00:00

I mean, simpin' ain't easy.

I'll show myself out.

Title	If simping worked most men would do it
Author	DriverInitial8305
Upvotes	35
Comments	87
Date	April 18, 2026 5:50 PM UTC (3 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1sp4e9z/if_simping_worked_most_men_would_do_it/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/if-simping-worked-most-men-would-do-it.1578285 https://theredarchive.com/post/1578285

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