Sleeping with the enemy

Infamous_Database_17 · 2025-03-03T03:45:38+00:00

Go take cold shower when you start to miss her, I have only ever had one partner my wife so sex is highly personal affair and sometimes living in the same house(till we get it sorted out) I feel those sensations but then reality hits me about what I have been put through and I painfully get out of those thoughts, I would advise you think about what you're doing before getting it on.

Chaotic_Boots · 2025-03-02T18:50:32+00:00

From personal experience: DON'T KEEP DOING IT

she's gonna do all the stuff you wish she did (or did more often) and then one day she'll have a boyfriend and shit is going to explode in your face.

Clean break, protect yourself man.

DiscoS22 · 2025-03-01T15:56:19+00:00

I would just use her to do the most dirtiest things, like straight up nasty And then I’d say see ya Don’t ever call me again

ConfidenceNo242 · 2025-03-01T14:48:57+00:00

She’s cheated on you. Why would you wanna be sloppy seconds to that?

autistic_midwit · 2025-03-01T13:50:06+00:00

Dont go digging through the trash that you already took out to the curb.

Find someone new.

CrazySanta7 · 2025-03-01T13:19:31+00:00

You are hooking up with a woman who cheated on you? Bro...c'mon. Get some respect for yourself and stop this. There are millions of women out there. This is beta AF. She certainly does not respect you. You are just giving her validation after she cheated on you. Get some fn boundaries and stop being weak when it comes to sex. Tell her today you are done 'hooking up'. Who knows what other guys she's f'ing. Good luck bro.

JustSomeDude7287 · 2025-03-01T01:51:07+00:00

Hysterical bonding really fucks us over. Stop it and start living separately as individual, your future self will thank you for this decision.

doggyboop · 2025-03-01T00:57:36+00:00

Self respect. Focus on that for yourself.

jbowman12 · 2025-02-28T23:26:56+00:00

A friend of mine split with his ex after he discovered she was cheating on him with a coworker. They lived separately for a month or two, but he had trouble going no contact. Then he was going over and having sex with her weekly. I tried to tell him it wouldn't end well and he was just delaying the inevitable. I had watched how her cheating on him had emotionally destroyed him, and of course it killed me to see it. I knew if he could just take the heartbreak one good time and move on, he'd be all the better for it.

Well, he kept on for a couple of months, and somehow finally realized she hadn't ever cut off the guy she cheated on him with. Of course it hurt him again but not quite as bad as the first time. An argument ensued, he realized nothing had changed and that was that.

When he finally let her go and moved on, my man really leveled up in life and I couldn't be happier for him. I'm talking him moving an hour and a half away, landing a job making money I dream of making, made new friends, met plenty of new girls, and he's still doing great to this day.

OP- Not telling you what to do by any means, just sharing a story with you. Do with it what you will.

No-Walk-1633 · 2025-02-28T22:18:32+00:00

Come on man, she cheated on you. Probably sneaking into your bed the nights she can't get with someone else.

Dangerfield85 · 2025-02-28T22:15:23+00:00

You need CGA or Listen My Son, badly. Get on YouTube, get red pilled but avoid the rage.

GenX_Flex · 2025-02-28T20:34:17+00:00

Please stop sleeping with your ex.

Physical-Setting2122 · 2025-02-28T18:53:34+00:00

Once bitten , let it go man; self respect is important ; I completely understand - the loneliness and the hunger should make you seek shelter and consume from wrong place ; she is the wrong place ; stop all contact with her divert your mind and energy into something else ; be brave bro ,

qmriis · 2025-02-28T18:25:07+00:00

No self respect.

huggsnkisses · 2025-02-28T17:42:31+00:00

Story old as time. Nothing can go wrong!

UnimportantOutcome67 · 2025-02-28T17:22:42+00:00

Dude.

Have some self respect.

Stop simping.

You are her trained monkey.

ww3historian · 2025-02-28T17:20:46+00:00

Did she fuck other dudes? Swallow their cum? And you’re going to kiss those lips now?

Particular_Act7478 · 2025-02-28T17:07:42+00:00

Huge train wreck waiting to happen. Not good at all. Wasted time.

Zealousideal_Try_864 · 2025-02-28T16:54:39+00:00

Every time that you sleep with her she views you as less of a man.

And yes, she wants something. It’s a classic hoover.

Maintain your boundaries and only communicate about the children. If it becomes about anything else then exit the conversation immediately.

VeteranEntrepreneurs · 2025-02-28T16:47:12+00:00

1) The other man thing - you married your wife and trusted her enough to have a kid with, you need to trust her she would make the right decision. Maintain as strong of a relationship with your daughter and a healthy co-parenting relationship with your ex.

2) the sleeping with her piece - yes she has figured out a way to come back into your life physically, but your actions are 100% on you. It sounds like you lack healthy boundaries and that is something you should work with a therapist on because it likely shows up in other places in your life.

concordion · 2025-02-28T16:40:43+00:00

Regarding other men being around your little girls - there’s a point where you will need to let go of that anxiety because you can’t control what she does. All you can do is pay very close attention to what your girls say about the people your ex brings into their lives, and push for what’s right when you hear things that are going south.

It’s very painful to build up to that acceptance, but it is possible.

drtystv · 2025-02-28T16:38:32+00:00

Seems to me there’s more than 10% nasty

Regular-Bat-4449 · 2025-02-28T16:35:48+00:00

Of course, it's monetary. She's going to go right back to her old ways within 6 weeks if you get back with her. Best thing you can do is cut her off completely

Excellent-Football57 · 2025-02-28T16:13:14+00:00

Never.... never do that

She may be setting you up. Do not get yourself in deeper. Never.

Never.

Unless it's to collect evidence against her but always watch what you do

Doing_Number5 · 2025-02-28T16:02:21+00:00

You’ve had to spend your hard earned money to gain independence from a woman who completely disrespected you and your marriage. And now np you’re finally free and she’s now back to complicate your life after the fact. Maybe you’re so close to the problem that it helps to hear the truth from someone else. I’m the same way at times. The truth is a woman that would prioritize her sexual desire to be with another man over the family that she’s built needs to be avoided at all costs. She’s a train wreck. Just think in a few years you’ll both be getting some real difficult questions from your daughters. What do you want them to learn about you. That men are weak and utilities for whatever you want them to be at the will of your emotions at that time? This is your opportunity to reflect on what you can change about yourself that contributed to your divorce so you’re not doomed to do it again. But you can’t do that when you’re clouding your vision. 9/10 she’s enjoying getting what she wanted from the other guy, but just doesn’t wanna see you move on and happy with someone else.

If you really wanna move on, you need to be the man in this and set the boundaries that need to be set. Let her know if it ain’t about the kids, theres nothing between you guys. If after a couple years you’ll both somehow still miss her and want to go back (which I doubt will be the case) then you can better trust your judgement, because you’re looking at the situation from a more clear view

Maybe_an_Abyss · 2025-02-28T15:47:48+00:00

If you are paying her alimony, date her and move in and say it should be cancelled since she is co-habitating. Then once that is over dump her and move back out.

Not sure if it will work but a man can dream.

Royal-Reporter6664 · 2025-02-28T15:33:16+00:00

Stroke one out as soon as she asks to come over

Post nut clarity is a real thing

TraditionalHour7561 · 2025-02-28T15:27:33+00:00

I don’t think we need to, you have the right idea.

Seriously though, quit fucking her. She might be trying to get pregnant to increase her support amount and not have to work.

Title	Sleeping with the enemy
Author	Par_then_Bar
Upvotes	39
Comments	48
Date	February 28, 2025 3:22 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1j0a4ok/sleeping_with_the_enemy/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/sleeping-with-the-enemy.1545231 https://theredarchive.com/post/1545231

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