Apologizing for or sympathizing with "cancelled" woman-abusers is big time Pick Me behaviour - From Vanity Fair: 'Dakota Johnson Calls Cancel Culture "Such a Downer"

DivineGoddess1111111 · 2021-11-07T11:25:21+00:00

Her father got together with her mother Melanie Griffith when she was FOURTEEN.

Her grandmother was abused by Alfred Hitchcock and never got any justice.

It's disgusting that Dakota wants to be the devils advocate of vile abusers. You think she would have learned from her matriarchal elders.

engineergorl · 2021-11-07T06:00:48+00:00

“I had an incredible time working with them”. Of f*cking course they’re going to be nice and professional to a coworker who’s also a famous actress. Lots of abusers act like the nicest people in public because the dumb ones that are known as assholes publicly don’t get any defenders from the community that “can’t imagine him ever doing something like this”. Any smart abuser does all the degenerate shit in private so that it’s just he says/she says and he can call her crazy or a liar and have people believe it.

Jandi18 · 2021-11-07T08:01:11+00:00

She is also dating someone 14 years older than her so I’m taking whatever she says with a grain of salt. Btw Cancel culture has always been here! The difference is it was mostly women that suffered from it. Remember Janet Jackson’s wardrobe malfunction? How she lost a lot of gigs due to it but Justin Timberlake was doing just fine! Thé long list of women that were slut shamed but the men they slept with were seen as heros.

Now cancel culture is including men ( me too etc) all of a sudden some people have alot to say. While cancel culture isn’t perfect, people need to be called out when they mess up!

Edit: thanks for the award 🥇 !!!

cwfs1007 · 2021-11-07T13:54:06+00:00

Well he didn't rape me so I think he's an alright guy! /s

daisy_0720 · 2021-11-07T07:52:18+00:00

Given how her grandmother was treated by LVM Alfred Hitchcock, this is truly a betrayal. I bet Tippi Hedren would have given ANYTHING for a MeToo/TimesUp movement that would have made Hitchcock face consequences for his gross behavior.

I hope she never speaks to her granddaughter.

_laufaeson · 2021-11-07T12:47:22+00:00

Coming from the woman in Fifty Shades of Grey this is a laugh.

yfunk3 · 2021-11-07T13:04:40+00:00

I bet she'd totally leave her daughter alone in a room with all of these men, then.

My brain automatically erases the existence of people who deride "wokeness" and "cancel culture" as if it's some scourge on society as harmful as disinformation, climate change, or the intentional systemic breakdown of democracies worldwide by right-wing factions. Because said denouncement of cancel culture is just a strawman argument and distraction to be used as a means to all three of those ends in one way or another, just like liberal feminism is a tool to help keep the patriarchy in place.

ctrlcutie · 2021-11-07T06:34:39+00:00

I'm not an Ellen fan but how is she complaining about cancel culture when she got on so many people's good sides in taking part of cancelling Ellen lmao

also not just her but so many celebrities say "it didn't happen to me so he must be a good guy!!!"

also I can't separate the art from the artist, you're still giving the abuser a paycheck to support their lifestyle. that being said, human beings (those victims) are more important than art

vaguelinen · 2021-11-07T06:35:02+00:00

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NinjaCynic · 2021-11-07T07:32:26+00:00

Did she learn nothing from working with Time's Up?

thepsychopathhunter · 2021-11-07T14:00:17+00:00

This is really disappointing and awful. Being surrounded by pickme family members and friends who excused the actions of abusers is so frustrating. These women need to be exposed. Often these women hide in plain sight and gain popularity without anyone realizing they are enabling predators. It's sickening.

IndividualRoutine661 · 2021-11-07T14:47:34+00:00

“I’ve not personally experienced x thing so I feel f*** all empathy for others who have. And, I’ll side with the oppressors for keeping the perverted status quo as I might gain some personal advantage from this”

There, fixed it for you Dakota Johnson

East-Willingness513 · 2021-11-07T06:10:46+00:00

I mean, she was made famous by starring in 50 shades of grey. I don’t think anyone is really listening to anything she has to say.

wolfshadow1995 · 2021-11-07T15:15:42+00:00

It really is sad because what she’s saying is a prime example of how abusers get away with their behavior. Not every man who’s abusive abuses literally anyone woman he comes into contact with. The most charming ones know specifically which women to target and which ones to act like a perfect gentleman toward. Her saying all of this is probably so upsetting to the women who these men did abuse. It’s like saying “Brian Laundrie was so nice to me! There’s no way he murdered his fiancee!” I’m sure many women went on a date with Ted Bundy and thought he was a great guy too….

throwawaynevermindit · 2021-11-07T17:06:50+00:00

Women like this really are super dangerous - they're the women with whom abusers construct reputation shields. It should go without saying that abusive men don't abuse every single person, or even every single woman, that they have a personal relationship with. They need 9 to believe they're good men so that the 10th isn't believed when she speaks up. It's deliberate.

SamEsme · 2021-11-07T16:52:37+00:00

I've always disliked her since she picked that 50 shades role. Why would you willingly do such a role

queenofswordsxxx · 2021-11-07T06:44:30+00:00

It’s so cringey when white men/ or women in a privileged position come out to defend predators by using the common argument of “Well I didn’t experience any of XYZ when he was working with me!”

LOL it’s like the fundamentally don’t understand how humans work. Just bc someone puts up a certain facade/ shows a certain image in front of you, doesn’t mean they aren’t shitty to other people.

Not to mention, if you’re rich, white and privileged, chances are you were even the target of such abuse. You weren’t “prey”.

Your experience of someone is not the same as another persons experience.

Edit: Also to add - She doesn’t seem like a credible source for what’s appropriate behaviour, considering she’s dating Chris Martin who’s about 14 years older than her

thinktwiceorelse · 2021-11-07T11:26:37+00:00

But all these people dropped JKR like a hot potato. Apparently, being cannibal is more acceptable.

randomgirl34861 · 2021-11-07T19:07:14+00:00

I agree that cancel culture can get out of hand because people forget that a key part of being being culturally competent/aware is realizing when you’ve done something wrong and taking steps to do better.

However, the mistakes you make should be genuine mistakes and not malicious choices. (Hint: If you know in your heart in that moment you’re doing a bad thing, then what you’re making is a malicious choice and not a genuine mistake.)

An example of a genuine mistake would be a White person who has the right message…but spoke over a POC rather than amplifying their voice 😬 They were trying to do a good thing, but failed to realize that they were hurting someone in that moment. Someone who does that doesn’t need to be banned from Hollywood and Twitter because if their heart is in the right place, they’re open to fully understanding why what they did wasn’t the proper way to act. They give a sincere apology (because they feel remorse and want to say sorry) and then they do better next time (because it’s actually important to them).

The people referenced in this article didn’t make genuine mistakes, they made malicious choices. Everyone who is aware they are conscious knows better than to touch someone who doesn’t want to be touched. If you made it all the way to the big screen, you are smart enough to know this. My cat is not so bright; She chases her own tail, catches it then cries on a regular basis… but she still understands what go away means.

They’re not sorry they acted poorly, they’re sorry they were caught acting poorly. If they apologized….it was done to save their image and not for the peace and growth that accompanies a genuine apology and real forgiveness.

Also gonna air this controversial opinion of mine: I don’t give a fuck if we lose aRtiiSTs and tAlLeNTt. There are so many talented artists in the world who are totally undiscovered. Actors and actresses who’s faces we’ve never seen (and will never see) that would move millions to viewers to tears with their beautiful and heartfelt performances if given the chance. No one’s acting is sooo special or amazing that their malicious choices should be overlooked. Each moment we spent supporting an individual who makes malicious choices is a moment that could have been used to enjoy the art of someone who doesn’t make malicious choices that hurt others.

Emergency-Feed8216 · 2021-11-07T20:20:06+00:00

Vichy women-- ugh. There's a reason people (and entire countries) hate and reserve worse punishments for traitors than they do for captured enemy combatants.

Not to say these turncoat women or anyone else should ever be subjected to vio.lence even as they ignore and minimize the vio.lence done to others. But I don't trust them, won't leave my kids with them, won't befriend them, won't hire them, let them.handle my money or represent me legally. I cancel them.

Title	Apologizing for or sympathizing with "cancelled" woman-abusers is big time Pick Me behaviour - From Vanity Fair: 'Dakota Johnson Calls Cancel Culture "Such a Downer"
Author	aluriaphin
Upvotes	680
Comments	51
Date	November 7, 2021 5:46 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/qoi8w6/apologizing_for_or_sympathizing_with_cancelled/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/apologizing-for-or-sympathizing-with-cancelled.1085473 https://theredarchive.com/post/1085473