Dad’s an HVM ❤️

quarterlyavocado · 2020-12-29T05:35:52+00:00

Omg this dad is amazing! I have to say though the mother is really getting on my last nerve with her “ it’s not your issue to get involved”. I’m sorry but who’s vagina did this daughter came out from??? You don’t have the common decency to protect your daughter from a loser. You have to let your child know how to set boundaries and place their foot down. Imagine she continues and waste her entire life on this MF only to realize that he is LV. She would’ve wished her parents intervened even if she was too stubborn to understand at 17. Life is too short to waste it on scrotes. She has plenty to find a good match.

PhoenixRisingAsap · 2020-12-29T08:39:16+00:00

I want to hold this girl by the shoulders and shake her up. You’re 17. You’re not supposed to be understanding of this dude’s “stress” and you’re entitled to expect more! Sigh. I wish girls knew they deserve better than what they settle for.

2020-12-29T05:23:17+00:00

Great dad. He is awesome. Best dad ever award goes to this guy☺️

Fun_Sherbet · 2020-12-29T05:43:40+00:00

Dunno about you but I'm sitting here wishing my dad would have exerted even the smallest iota of effort in teaching me my worth.. Thank you to this dad on behalf of daughters~!

hollypocketer · 2020-12-29T05:29:03+00:00

Amazing Dad. I always liked when a parent spoke up. Too bad it was my ex's Dad, and my ex never listened to a single thing he said. I should have realized, that in itself, was a red flag.

2020-12-29T08:57:32+00:00

Love the dad. Hate the boy. Who wants to date a boring loser who doesn't think it would be nice to take a walk to a tide pool to watch a sunset. It's bad enough that he wouldn't do it just to make her happy, or to spend time with her. But it's a huge personality flaw that he refuses to take a nice walk to watch the sun set.

iaintgonnacallyou · 2020-12-29T07:00:49+00:00

I wish I could’ve had a dad like this. It would’ve saved me alot of heartache and stress. This is such an important lesson for young women.

thinktwiceorelse · 2020-12-29T11:12:23+00:00

This girl has a HVM dad, and that's why she thinks everyone is automatically a good person. When they aren't, she thinks it's because of her, or because they're stressed, tired, whatever. Many people are gonna hurt her, but she'll recover quickly because she has a great example of a man in her dad.

mysecretdiary2 · 2020-12-29T06:35:27+00:00

Argh. Reminds me how my ex’s dad would take me out for dinner when I stayed over sometimes and was alone at home in the evening because my ex was in the gym.

Diamond_fairy · 2020-12-29T08:45:23+00:00

A well spoken father that actually remembers what his wife told him, feels like teaching boundaries against LVM to his daughter and takes action for the best?

This is an high value limited edition of a father. The daughter is lucky.

Fun_Tangerine4494 · 2020-12-29T07:04:10+00:00

This poor young woman has the makings of learning the hard way over and over and over and over.

nymphaetamine · 2020-12-29T16:12:17+00:00

My dad did this once. I was dating this loser in my early 20s who very quickly moved in with me, and I allowed it cause I felt bad for him(ugh I know). He quit his job after a month cause it was "bullshit", then pressured me to quit my job too. Kept pushing me to have his baby, and I can only assume he had big dreams of being a welfare couple who lives off benefits, I dunno. I was already on the brink of dumping him but then my dad found out this guy was basically squatting in my house and letting me pay for everything. He came over unannounced one night and gave that guy the ass-chewing of the decade. Yelled at him for being a loser who uses women and tries to boss them around, called him an overgrown toddler and ended the tirade by telling him he better man up and get his shit together or he would personally remove him from his daughter's house. Didn't have to cause I dumped him very shortly after that, but oh it was glorious. RIP dad, miss you <3

Bryce1215 · 2020-12-29T05:42:29+00:00

What was the consensus of the post? I’d say NTA, but there’s always some people...

Davina33 · 2020-12-29T09:39:16+00:00

All fathers need to be like this! I wonder just how much pain I could have avoided if I had a loving father instead of an absent one.

Equal-Ear2312 · 2020-12-29T12:45:25+00:00

I bet the scrote was on his phone either looking at porn or complaining that he is stuck with her and her family... Meanwhile he is living like a parasite and uses the resources her family has with no display of empathy. He's not bf material if he thinks going with his girlfriend to see the sunset is a "favor".

Just my 2 cents, the dad is too nice about it.

Le: The dad noticed it too: "the rest of the time he is playing videogames and expects her to watch".

This is a new pandemic as well.

dollymyfolly · 2020-12-29T14:32:26+00:00

This man is protecting his daughter. We have tons of evidence that little boy ain’t shit. Who the hell goes to a trailhead and texts? That repulses me.

PhoridayThe13th · 2020-12-29T12:04:09+00:00

We (society) teach our daughters to bend over backwards to meet the needs of others, and our sons to take, and take, and take some more. This girl’s father intervened on what could have become a long term shitshow. I hope she listened.

With that being said, I don’t like the idea of taking a boy on vacation with the family. Parents will have to sleep sometime, and it’s not wise to court disaster.

guavagoodness · 2020-12-29T13:02:02+00:00

Awww. What a sweet girl. I hate boys.

No, he shouldn’t have stayed out of it. Pick-me ass mom, training her daughter to “keep trying until he turns around”. These little boys sometimes need a grown ass man to say, hey, that is not cool and I see you behaving like a fucking twerp. All 17 year old boys need that reality check, they are so fucking coddled. Sometimes Dad has to put his foot down!

TexiMcCrae · 2020-12-29T09:34:28+00:00

I wish I had a father like that

GoldandGlowing · 2020-12-29T05:52:22+00:00

This is a HV move but that doesn’t mean he’s a HVM. A lot of men only become “HV” when they have a daughter, then it’s a switch up because they don’t want their daughter getting played the same way they used to play girls in their youth on some “I know how men are” shit... while not give a singular fuck about other women or girls; More of an ego/pride thing than genuine high-value.

DevouringPsyche · 2020-12-29T05:46:20+00:00

Poor girl! I hope her family making it clear to her that she’s worth better treatment will serve as the wake-up call she needs. Sometimes you really just need a third-party perspective make you realize how messed up the dynamic is

2020-12-29T08:29:29+00:00

The best father ever!!!

HappyCoconutty · 2020-12-29T13:40:40+00:00

As a mom of a daughter myself, I would not have intervened the way the dad did. I would say the opposite before I became a mom but now that I’m a mom and have read hella child psychology books, I know what addressing the boyfriend this way is going to do. This type of daughter is already the over accommodating pick-me type. Now she is going to try harder to soothe the boyfriend’s hurt feelings over the “abuse” the dad inflicted on an already “stressed” boy. Boyfriend will make her feel responsible for the bad feelings her dad caused and she will try even harder and be more invested in him.

Instead, the father should have let the daughter get her feelings hurt by the boyfriend over this sunset thing. Dropped him off back at his parents’ house and then address the daughter, her sense of worth, explain what a caring boyfriend would have done and then take her to counseling. She needs a professional to help her understand more about her low sense of self worth. Especially before she goes off to college. I’m pretty sure she already thinks messed up porn ideals are what sex and intimacy is about since we have 11 year old girls being addicted to online porn and completely messing up their frontal cortex.

The daughter needs to be able to look back on her own and realize how awful the boyfriend was to her. If you force or restrict this, it creates the opposite effect at this age.

plummyjellyfish · 2020-12-29T16:53:18+00:00

Unfortunately, study after study shows that LVM do not listen to or respect women in any way (obviously), so attempting to set them straight, regardless of method, is going to fail. Only strong HVM's can knock sense into these types of men. The father is doing exactly the right thing. I only wish he was more forceful about it! Who cares if the entitled little shit is upset? The mother gives me Pickmeisha energy from his description, bad parenting on her side.

dancedance_83 · 2020-12-29T17:16:01+00:00

i really wish i’d had a dad like this. my dad is the LOWEST LVM. beater, cheater, liar, sociopath. he has been addicted to every kind of drug since he was 14. it’s a shame because he’s incredibly smart and a very talented carpenter and every woman in my family has tried at one point to help him and he screwed them over. now he is in Florida with his enabler mother and they are both rotting in poverty. he has the audacity to ask me to fly out there with my one year old son. NO THANKS. i know there’s love deep deep down inside him but just NO. not exposing my son to anymore shiftiness than i already have to WITH HIS OWN DAD. damn men.

Telephonia · 2020-12-29T16:34:41+00:00

Wow... what in the world is happening with these younger guys being so consistent in this kind of dead brain behavior.... that is the real pandemic. sheeeeesh

Elisa_LaViudaNegra · 2020-12-29T17:36:01+00:00

Uh, it was ABSOLUTELY his place to step in and tell this little freeloading shit what was what. Especially if the dad spent his money on gas to get him there, food to eat while he was there, electricity to charge this boy’s precious phone, etc. He should have been DELIGHTED to go on a sunset walk with his girlfriend whose family had shown such hospitality, especially if that was all that was being asked in return. Come on. Parents, please teach your children to be more gracious than this flushable wet wipe of a person.

yolosunshine · 2020-12-29T21:44:48+00:00

The daughter is 17.

She’s still a child. It’s not a magic button.

I would not consider it to be at all presumption to sit her down privately and lay out ‘I got nothing against you having a boyfriend, but this one treats you like shit. I hope you find another one.’

No ultimatum, just ‘I’m willing to help whenever you decide to be with someone who treats you right’.

17 year old girls don’t know anything about how they should be treated, raised in this society.

LockLimePie · 2020-12-29T17:08:47+00:00

Guys think they can put in zero effort and nobody will notice. People notice. They just don't often comment on it or call them out. Absolutely love and adore this father for telling it like it is

Time_Attention_1182 · 2020-12-29T09:01:33+00:00

I am confused. Please enlighten me. I am culturally from a muuuuch more conservative background so That may have to do with it. How is her dad a hvm? He’s enabeling a 17 y.o boy to be living with his daughter. Free of charge, just because she likes him? Isn’t he enabeling the boy? What did the boy do to earn the trust of this family, the roof over his head and the free meal? Just because she likes him?

And it takes aaallll this for him to remember to hold this guy accountable

Please enlighten me

Sewud · 2020-12-29T14:10:34+00:00

That sounds exactly like all my ex boyfriends, weird?

Blacktontonguetoffee · 2020-12-29T17:01:05+00:00

It’s sad that now this dad has to question his own value and the value he has for his daughter bc of BOY CHILD. Infuriating.

honeybeeroll · 2020-12-29T19:27:09+00:00

I'm glad the father did this. I mean at that age he could forbid her from seeing this fucking loser, but I hope he continues to do what he did her, showing her what a fucking loser this guy is and encouraging her to listen to her feelings, listen to how upset he makes her. Like I hope the dad doesn't give up because she got upset or because the wife is being lazy and content to let her daughter date this fucking loser. Why would you even want this guy as a house guest!? He's a spoiled brat. I hope his dad keeps encouraging her and she stops listening to the pickme shit we all know she sees all over social media.

huevos_and_whiskey · 2020-12-29T15:52:10+00:00

NTA, but you don’t assert boundaries by forcing people to do what you want. You assert boundaries by walking away from people who don’t meet your standards.

Granted, there’s no way to make his daughter dump this guy, and at the end of the day it’s the daughter who needs to value herself and enforce her own boundaries. There’s really not much the dad can do, other than talk to her and let her know she deserves to be with someone who treats her better. It’s a delicate situation, because if the dad tries to force it at all, he’s just going to push his daughter closer to this LV boy. That’s why I think the only option is to focus on the positive and talk to her about what she deserves, what a good relationship would actually look like, and encourage her to hold out for the right guy.

husheveryone · 2020-12-29T16:19:58+00:00

Great dad! And if a parent is paying for their minor child and her boyfriend to stay in their home and chauffeuring them around then YES that parent gets to SPEAK their mind about all of it.

Rasaya87 · 2020-12-29T23:31:05+00:00

Ah, I remember seeing this post and feeling simultaneously happy for the girl, and distressed that my own father basically neglected the fuck out of me and my younger sister after our mom died, the day after my 16th birthday. He basically checked out and while I understand now that it was his way of coping and grieving with the love of his life's loss, ... it'd have been great if he actually supported us emotionally and parented us, instead of fucking off to another country or the casino multiple times because he didn't seem to want to get a part time job after retirement to take care of us. Or foisting us off on our mom's relatives.

Sorry, ranting.

BungalowBootieBitch · 2020-12-29T23:35:45+00:00

His daughter might be frustrated right now but she'll understand in the future. I remember being 17 and just settling for any little attention. I was on my pickme bs and it just wasn't a good time for me.

ceramicunicorn · 2020-12-30T02:19:25+00:00

The more I read posts like this, the more I want to consider a new career path in counseling, specializing in school-age girls and boys. We get sex ed for biological basics, but we don’t get the relationship ed that ties into that in our youth, to teach boundaries, standards, communication, self-validation, emotional intimacy, and relational work.

buzzkillyall · 2020-12-29T18:58:02+00:00

[deleted]

Title	Dad’s an HVM ❤️
Author	Surprise-Character
Upvotes	1001
Comments	62
Date	December 29, 2020 5:03 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/km7m6j/dads_an_hvm/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/dads-an-hvm.354501 https://theredarchive.com/post/354501

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