“I wAS GoInG tHrOuGh SoMe StUfF PeRsOnAlLy”

painmakesyoustronger · 2020-08-03T01:49:26+00:00

These fuckboys go from being brutally cold and ignoring you completely when it suits them to the most sickening saccharine bullshit you’ve ever heard when they need to get their dicks wet.

Don’t ever fall for a sudden development of “emotions”.

They’re fabricated.

AyemHerself · 2020-08-03T01:57:41+00:00

And by "going through some stuff" he of course means his roster of women who kept his interest before you.

Fatt3stAveng3r · 2020-08-03T01:37:02+00:00

And "come over so I can cook for you". Code for "lemme smash".

1Here4Bach · 2020-08-03T03:11:51+00:00

Why do men always do this? How about work on yourself before you even think about entertaining a woman. She doesn’t deserve to be dragged through your emotionally immature bullshit.

DinkyDoo531 · 2020-08-03T03:06:47+00:00

"I was going through some stuff personally" means he had another girl, shit didn't work out and now he's running to whoever he can.

purasangria · 2020-08-03T01:44:25+00:00

Anything that follows “to be honest” is guaranteed to be a load of bullshit

ChristianGirl93 · 2020-08-03T01:31:17+00:00

Damn girl! Yes haha! Get you a man who can ‘go through stuff’ with you, not act like a scared little boy and leave. Excuses they make!

feminist-hermione · 2020-08-03T02:49:39+00:00

I think what especially kills me about this is it sets the bar so low for what "I'm sorry, I was going through some stuff" actually covers. I feel like so many dudes say that when they weren't, in fact, going through anything.

Capable_Okra · 2020-08-03T03:48:00+00:00

"going through some stuff personally" = his first choice dumped his ass and now he's backpedalling desperately

randomdazee · 2020-08-03T01:29:00+00:00

I know you’re not supposed to respond but I did block and delete immediately. He’s tried to reach out on every medium possible but I didn’t realize he hadn’t been deleted on this one.

purasangria · 2020-08-03T02:33:25+00:00

He wants to invite you over, cook boxed mac and cheese, and give you his "all." 🍆

Nice. Glad you noped on outta there.

QueenRizla · 2020-08-03T08:12:30+00:00

Do you notice the way he doesn’t say the word Sorry?, he paints a narrative that is a million miles away from an apology. It is like this was all out of his control and he is fact some honourable hero. Something external happened that ‘made’ him push you away. But he has bravely fought it and is ‘all good’. Women constantly apologise to men for everything! We are always saying sorry, massaging egos, letting them down gently etc. etc. Instead of F*ck off I’m not interested in this BS.

sarahbae03 · 2020-08-03T02:46:28+00:00

Classy and firm.

Pahapan · 2020-08-03T05:14:10+00:00

Even if you're going through some personal shit, there's literally no reason why you can't tell the person you're talking to why you're going to fall out of contact. And if that personal shit was going on before you started talking to that person? Then you're a dickhead. Mature adults get their personal shit sorted before they start talking to and dating people.

Caspian-sea · 2020-08-03T05:41:27+00:00

LOL what the hell is with all these dumbasses using "I went through something & suddenly acted like a bipolar piece of shit towards you, but it's over now"?? When did this become a legitimate thing to even say out loud to someone, they should feel EMBARRASSED about that, not unabashedly proud to use it as an excuse................

powerline2500 · 2020-08-03T01:46:26+00:00

I swear "I was going through some personal stuff" is an outright lie. Like you werent doing shit but being lazy, partying and showing general disinterest.

Outside of yourself or a cloae family memeber or friend being seriously sick/ill, someone being dead or dying. What kind of "personal stuff"?

This man sounds like a person who welcomes drama into his life, gets wrapped up in it, lets it waste his time.

I cant stand people like that. I swear I cut everyone off who brings problems to my life. We cannot control illness and death. Everything else is in our control.

If it does not pertain to those two things I dont care. I dont want to know. I dont want to hear about it. I have a friend that I work with like this. Everything in her life is a big ass fucking drama. And she willingly gets herself involved in shit that has nothing to do with her. Gets stressed out. Then comes to me to vent.

After Corona is over and I change jobs, Im cutting her off.

You dodge a bullet OP. A person going through some real shit would be so wrapped up in it they would abandon dating all together to focus on that. This fool is just a drama loving piece of shit.

desertedstreets · 2020-08-03T05:28:37+00:00

Hahahha "I was goiNg thRouGh somE stUff pErsonAllY". Have heard this one very often. It's complete bs

comet2004 · 2020-08-03T05:58:49+00:00

going through shit is mancode for not wanting to grow up literally. i've actually been through shit and let me tell you if it gets in the way of dating I explain the shit I am going through to the person I am dating and let them decide if its too much for them and they want to hold off or if they are willing to work with my situation. You don't just treat someone badly because you are going through stuff.

daisy_0720 · 2020-08-03T07:00:52+00:00

I can practically hear the gears turning his head as he frantically tries to work out why you went off-script and didn't respond: "Poor baby! Of COURSE it's okay! But next time it happens, just remember to use me for sex and free therapy to work through your problems instead of withdrawing! Hope you're feeling better now xxx"

overthinkersanon8 · 2020-08-03T03:55:58+00:00

Fuck this is good. You deserve a prize.

virginiagirl27 · 2020-08-03T09:50:23+00:00

This happened to me so so many times. Like once you a ghost, you ain’t coming back zombie.

Lavender_flow · 2020-08-03T10:01:24+00:00

He was dating other chicks and now he wants to get his dick wet. Fuckboiii deluxe detected.

2020-08-03T03:08:19+00:00

Good riddance!!!!!

honeybeeroll · 2020-08-03T14:51:44+00:00

This is a good response in that it's businesslike almost lol, the "thank you for clearing up some lingering questions" especially. Always love a businesslike approach when someone's screwed u over in dating. But man this loser didn't even deserve that 🙄.

Still his approach isn't the worst I've seen. Friend of mine briefly dated this guy who'd go days w/o texting her and blame it on his job, but 1) she'd dated a man in that field before who always found time to text her, even if it was only once a day 2) he found time to be on social media lol. She got rid of him, and then after a couple months no contact, he showed up, no apology, not even a half assed one, and was basically like "I have time to date you now" 🙄🙄

tamarindoseco · 2020-08-03T09:00:07+00:00

Honestly wouldn't even reply to that.

sashimi_girl · 2020-08-03T15:49:05+00:00

It cracks me up when men say “going through some stuff”. It always makes me picture like, not actually processing past trauma and analyzing your feelings with a professional, but some guy going through a physical bin of stuff. He looks down at his phone like, “well that was fun! Time to text my ex from three years ago 🤪”

michelle27519 · 2020-08-03T14:54:31+00:00

Your response was so perfect. These online guys are Mostly complete idiots.

randomgirlimok · 2020-08-04T03:13:36+00:00

“The other girl didn’t work out so now I’m pursuing you. Come to my house and give me sex in exchange for a shitty spaghetti dinner”

esthermaniii · 2020-08-03T08:09:53+00:00

This is amazing!

PsychologicalBeat2 · 2020-08-03T15:40:17+00:00

God I love seeing women stick up for themselves and their standards <3

loneWoolfy · 2020-08-03T11:14:33+00:00

Need more context

FemThrow9 · 2020-08-04T01:09:28+00:00

I love the grace and beauty you handled this with!

Title	“I wAS GoInG tHrOuGh SoMe StUfF PeRsOnAlLy”
Author	randomdazee
Upvotes	692
Comments	65
Date	August 3, 2020 1:27 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/i2o12h/i_was_going_through_some_stuff_personally/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/i-was-going-through-some-stuff-personally.722091 https://theredarchive.com/post/722091

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