Ikea knows what's up

Enlightened_Gardener · 2021-07-11T23:24:38+00:00

Putting Ikea furniture together is one of the best tests of a man, and of a relationship IMO. All the little tells - does he read instructions, does he force things together when he can’t get them to fit, does he swear or slam things when he’s impatient or frustrated, does he have a set of basic tools, does he give up too easily.....

The other one I’ve learnt personally is putting up a tent together in the rain. Wish I’d paid attention to that one. He ended up sitting in the car while I did it. But not until after he’d thrown a massive tantrum. I thought he was “artistic” and “sensitive,” but it turned out he was a garden-variety narcissitic pyschopath.

Lemon_bars_addiction · 2021-07-11T20:44:03+00:00

Deceased 😩

99power · 2021-07-11T21:10:35+00:00

Thanks, my entire neighborhood heard me today 🤣

thenevacat · 2021-07-12T08:04:07+00:00

When you are Scandinavian and pronounce it like it should be and are extremely confused what’s so funny, until you see it 😂😂

galian84 · 2021-07-11T22:19:06+00:00

LOL I love this 😂

munissa · 2021-07-11T22:48:59+00:00

Thelimitdoes · 2021-07-11T22:45:59+00:00

Hahaha

shutup201 · 2021-07-11T22:44:32+00:00

Lol!

Lost_Kale90 · 2021-07-11T23:46:36+00:00

Omggg 🤣 I legit would buy this just to have a reminder, and laugh, every time I saw it

90sfemgroups · 2021-07-11T21:44:19+00:00

It really is a trash phrase. After a few times, I realized it was used as a conversation stopper, just one more way for some (most?) men to silence women and women's experiences. Why is it so important to say 'not all men'? Why is that more important than having a civil conversation about some serious problems in this world? Eh? If you're not guilty of the problem, and if you yourself wouldn't want to be harassed or assaulted or violated or stalked... join the conversation! The best way to do so is to give up your "not all men" pacifier and listen the fuck up for once. Start there. And that is why it is a trash phase and this post kills.

FunnyGreatFalcon · 2021-07-12T03:29:10+00:00

I can't find this on the ikea website :(

prettyexcitingnews · 2021-07-12T07:51:27+00:00

I’m dead. This made my day 💀💀💀🤣

ferretcat · 2021-07-12T16:51:25+00:00

This is just toooooo good!! Good job OP on finding this

DeclineNDash · 2021-07-12T18:04:36+00:00

Whew!! This is gold! I’m definitely putting this in the group chat with my girls 🤣🤣🤣

AutomaticNopeMachine · 2021-07-11T19:38:30+00:00

This reminds me of a nice vetting strategy:

the Ikea stroll.

This is more for long term dating situations, and only of it’s NOT a pickme thing to do where you live (not a ring hint). Then go to ikea or any other such store and observe:

• Most scrotes will be using it for future faking. (“Our kids will love that car shaped bed haha” when you’re not even talking of engagement).

• Is he implying you’ll cook for him in the display kitchen or hinting any other kind of wife performance?

• Some furniture pieces are scrote faves, like the lazy grandpa couch. He’ll hang around those.

• Is he annoyed by children messing the display?

• Really pushing you for anything 500 days with summer-ish, placing you as manic pixie dream girl instead of acting like an adult around house supplies.

bijig · 2021-07-11T21:05:00+00:00

Time to take out the trash.

Equestrian-Bitch · 2021-07-11T21:41:28+00:00

I peed 😭😭😭

Happylittlepinetree · 2021-07-11T21:46:55+00:00

🤣🤣

omgshooooes72 · 2021-07-11T23:06:26+00:00

I cackled when I saw this. 💀

throwaway23er56uz · 2021-07-11T22:12:36+00:00

Many years ago, I was a IKEA with a guy I knew. I didn't realized he was romantically interested in me (actually, it wasn't personal, he just wanted a women who'd pop out a few kids for him). But if I had been interested in him, that visit would have killed any interest.

Before the visit, he was totally biased against IKEA because they had "bad quality" stuff (he had never been to an IKEA store before). Then, in the store, he had to admit some items were actually quite nice. After trying in vain to impress me with his superior taste in furniture, he then told me he had bought some new kitchen knives. Turned out they were the type where you get a multipack with different-colored handles at a discounter or dollar store and throw them away after a few months because they broke. Because he wasn't going to spend money on knives.

ShieldMaidenLagertha · 2021-07-11T21:46:30+00:00

Amazing 🤣

the-only-green-zebra · 2021-07-12T01:41:20+00:00

fun fact: that means "emergency" in German, idrk what that says about scrotes, interpret it however you want

Theboredshrimp · 2021-07-12T10:18:30+00:00

repost

Title	Ikea knows what's up
Author	Eqvvi
Upvotes	2761
Comments	69
Date	July 11, 2021 7:18 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/oiaq91/ikea_knows_whats_up/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/ikea-knows-whats-up.791145 https://theredarchive.com/post/791145

Comments

the Ikea stroll.