Nothing but tea

420snailmode · 2020-07-16T16:34:59+00:00

[deleted]

StormyL · 2020-07-16T16:27:32+00:00

Or when they want a "dominant woman " but just mean they want someone who'll do all the work

Avoiding_existence · 2020-07-16T17:32:01+00:00

It annoys the shit outta me when LVM use women to masturbate but then complain when a woman is "a starfish"

Like bro what difference does it make, you want her to act like she's enjoying being used like an object??? You're still gonna focus 100% on your own pleasure, stop acting like you give a damn

They just want women to pretend like they enjoy it without even trying to make it enjoyable tf

masterofthebarkarts · 2020-07-16T17:45:16+00:00

Ugghhh so true. One of my exes was "dom" in bed, by which he meant that he wanted to do whatever he thought I would enjoy and then complain and blame me when I tried to tell him what I actually like. He literally told me "you should like what I do". I was like nah bro you're terrible at this *shrug emoji*

My husband is assertive in bed, in that he knows what I like and doesn't make me do all the work or lead the encounter while still being HYPER AWARE OF AND RESPONSIVE TO my needs. THAT'S what I like.

Martell2647 · 2020-07-16T16:59:11+00:00

Or they just love abusing women and hide behind being a “dom”.

MotherofJackals · 2020-07-16T16:35:48+00:00

Dominate in bed translation I only know two sexual positions and I'll either orgasim before you even realize I'm in or go soft if you break my concentration.

Summerisle7 · 2020-07-16T16:54:40+00:00

The word "dominant" makes me heave

2020-07-16T17:45:54+00:00

I never knew how to call this!! Using your body to masturbate sounds about right. I had a boyfriend that was addicted to porn and did exactly this. Ew.

aquasanguine · 2020-07-16T21:31:36+00:00

I’m dominant or I’m kinky really just means “I’m going to slap and choke you. Don’t be boring 🙃”

Partyavoider29 · 2020-07-17T00:25:41+00:00

The worst is when they tell you to "cum for them" like that's how it works. It's so stressful. Like, I don't even really need to be here. You're not having sex with me. I'm just the vagina.

michelle27519 · 2020-07-17T00:40:27+00:00

So true. My ex would describe himself as dominant but also would drink too much so struggle to cum and of course that was my fault. lol

Elisa_LaViudaNegra · 2020-07-16T19:26:45+00:00

I once had an ex self-identify as an alpha male. This man cried more than I did. Was the grown man version of a shaking chihuahua. I’m all for vulnerability but he turned into a puddle of insecurity at the slightest things.

_tinyimp · 2020-07-17T03:34:57+00:00

Or worse, he wants to be the dominant one in non-sexual situations too. Now the power dynamic has shifted bc if you disobey say a domestic command you’re reprimanded in the bedroom. Which idk how these BDSM people deal with that, they must be sex addicts, because that would get old wouldn’t it.

2020-07-16T23:07:03+00:00

Reminds me when ex refuse to let me have a blanket when I was cold during "sex" because he wanted to stare at my tits. What's the point of having sex if they don't bother to make it great for you?

I see a trend on Tik Tok and Instagram of pickmes taping a video where you see their underwear around their ankles or just their legs. It's implied they had sex with their partners and partners nut in them and went back to playing video games. These pickmes idk why are taping this like it's funny or cute if it was me I wouldn't be taping I would get up and smack them in the head for doing that behaviour but again I have self respect for myself. Also, it's not even cute that he got you to orgasm and quickly leave to play with the "boyz online". Like ugh how can you stay in love with someone like that?

luna_prismatic · 2020-07-17T03:36:49+00:00

I don’t know if this exclusively applies to men who label themselves “dominant” either. Kinda seems like the whole unresponsive to your needs + using your body to masturbate thing is par for the course as far as male sexuality goes. Yes, there are some who don’t do this. But they’re rare, and, at least in my experience, often huge egomaniacs who do it more so for their own satisfaction (“I’m so good at making women cum”), than for the satisfaction of their partner.

2020-07-16T16:21:20+00:00

YEP.

Thestral-glow6 · 2020-07-16T16:30:11+00:00

The truth!👆👆

throwaway23004345 · 2020-07-16T18:40:28+00:00

Men only care about their own pleasure, never a woman’s

ms_monquis · 2020-07-16T23:00:06+00:00

Damn. This is another one I learned the hard way.

Not even from the one who thought “why can’t I just have women serve me without asking for anything in return?” was being dominant.

dntbfllikeidid · 2020-07-16T19:19:32+00:00

100% this. Yet, we see some pickmeishas around here who are into that kind of shit and enjoy being degraded and humiliated by their “daddy”. Try therapy instead ladies, you deserve better than being treated like a doll for someone else’s pleasure!

michska_ · 2020-07-17T09:15:54+00:00

The volume on this bus is astr-o-no-mi-cal

NorthrnSwede · 2020-07-16T21:20:09+00:00

🤮

2020-07-16T18:29:27+00:00

Code word for covert abuse

DaizyDuchess · 2020-07-16T23:40:08+00:00

So many moons ago I sort of thought I was into “doms” because I liked men who lead. A guy I knew told me something; he said to avoid any guy who calls himself a dom because it’s just an abuser trying to have a veneer of legitimacy. I thought at the time that his explanation was over-simplistic, but now I know he was 100% right. A man who is strong and loving does not ever call himself a dom. A man who calls himself a dom is just some asshole with an internet connection who thinks he can use the BDSM scene to abuse women. Avoid at all costs.

virgo-queen · 2020-07-16T23:46:02+00:00

Real men don’t need to say they’re dominant. Just like a real genius doesn’t go around proclaiming they are a genius!

Khione541 · 2020-07-16T20:17:59+00:00

Last year I dated a man who considered himself a "Dom," but was quite possibly the WORST dude I've ever been in bed with. Zero foreplay. Not even the first time. I tried multiple times to explain how women orgasm, that we're like ovens, not light switches, but it made no difference. Explicitly telling him what I needed made no difference. I remember him telling me before we had sex the first time that he'd had two sexless marriages - when we finally got to the point of getting naked, and he just went straight to jackhammering without even so much as touching any other part of my body, I instantly knew why.

Porn has made most men into shitty, selfish lovers. I'm hoping one day I luck out and find one that has what I'm looking for, plus understands what a woman needs in bed. I've only had a couple of lovers in my life that have really understood that, and I'm almost 40.

humanbeing2016 · 2020-07-17T00:05:32+00:00

I have not seen truer words!

sab862607 · 2020-07-16T21:06:16+00:00

They don’t even k ow what that means 🤦🏿‍♀️

burst_holy · 2020-07-16T21:21:28+00:00

Oh shit. I've felt this way before but have so far been unable to articulate it.

2020-07-17T00:57:24+00:00

🐸🍵

marysia94 · 2020-07-16T18:42:44+00:00

[removed]

Title	Nothing but tea
Author	Descendant_of_Innana
Upvotes	3274
Comments	69
Date	July 16, 2020 4:17 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/hscibr/nothing_but_tea/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/nothing-but-tea.714674 https://theredarchive.com/post/714674

Comments