A guy got raped and was forced to take responsibility for a kid he didn't want. People in r/relationship are doubting he was raped because he's trying to be a good dad.

myalias1 · 2017-09-13T18:18:04+00:00

you should see what this piece of shit /u/hisstriss is saying:

Rape survivors don't fawn over their rapists, even with a baby in the picture.

There is no conceivable way he would pay for the expenses of his rapist that drugged him.

let's all remember this next time someone claims battered spouses don't stay with their abusers, or rape victims don't refuse to press charges and get back with their rapists over and over. let's remember this next time some loudmouthed fuck like this moron claims all rape victims respond to their trauma differently and don't follow some preconceived course of action.

EeeeeeevilMan · 2017-09-13T14:24:58+00:00

I actually went to archive that thread because of how goddamn disgusting it was and saw that someone had already archived it 31 minutes ago, so I knew it'd be here.

That thread was one of the most infuriating I've ever seen seen on r/relationships.

The guy got raped. Not tee-hee he had one drink and couldn't consent via the feminist rules rape. Like he literally got drugged and raped.

And they're tearing him down in that thread for trying to take care of his kid.

Edit to add: Any suggestions on relevant subreddits this should be crossposted to? I am so fucking sick of r/relationships. People need to see what a fucking shithole it is.

HeForeverBleeds · 2017-09-13T16:50:39+00:00

Summary of all the upvoted comments: "men who say they were raped by women are really just cheaters making things up"

There are so many ignorant people there saying "if he were really raped, he wouldn't be okay with letting his rapist raise his child or giving her money". Do they really think that in these scenarios a man actually has a choice in the matter? The only way for him to get full custody and keep the child away from the mother would be for him to have his rapist legally convicted of rape or sexual assault (and even then, there's no guarantee)

The people there are talking like this is an easy thing to do, like "well, why wouldn't he just keep the child and get his rapist in jail if he was raped? Checkmate!" They clearly know nothing about what it's actually like to be a man or boy raped by a woman in a society where the odds are entirely stacked against him

JoelTLoUisBadass · 2017-09-13T14:04:42+00:00

I bet if the genders were reversed anyone who even implies doubt would get insulted and downvoted to oblivion, but since it's a guy who got raped, it gets top comment.

theothermod · 2017-09-13T23:17:12+00:00

Hello and welcome to /r/MensRights. If you are not a subscriber, please take a moment to understand what you are seeing.

This subreddit is dedicated to discussions surrounding the issues currently faced by men in our society.

We welcome healthy debate and you won't be banned merely for disagreement. While it is common for people here to reject feminist ideology, that doesn't mean we are anti-women or anti-equal rights.

Here is a quick review of some of the most interesting discussions on this subreddit. If you are interested in understanding the views of a feminist who investigated the men's rights movement, please check out her documentary all about it. If you want to know more about the issues we are concerned with, try these books: The War Against Boys by Christina Hoff Sommers or The Myth of Male Power by Warren Farrell.

Thank you for being open minded.

jollygnome123 · 2017-09-13T23:08:20+00:00

Maybe not the #1 priority here but can we take a minute to appreciate this guy's wife? Man gets raped physically and financially and his wife believes him, supports him, and works with him. I know we shouldn't have to appreciate this so much, but in a world where gender roles are as they are it's nice to see an example of a truly wonderful woman. Especially against the backdrop of the horrible ones we know exist.

L3tum · 2017-09-13T19:40:15+00:00

"Men can be raped, but..."

Fuck this. What about "in dubio pro reo"?

TheMeisterAce · 2017-09-13T14:22:53+00:00

That place is full of retards. It is like the pathetic and uninteresting Jerry Springer show. The OP is not the guy discussed but his wife. Otherwise I would go throw in my two cents with that gaggle of harpies.

Part of the issue is that men do not discuss this stuff. There is no balance between being a man and discussing the trespasses against our liberties and rights. If we bring it up it is viewed as being weak.

Men need to change that dynamic and approach things in such a way that we support each other from strength while maintaining our self-image.

In reality military men are preyed upon relentlessly. They are slut magnets and the sluts only have dollar signs in their eyes. As a veteran I would strongly recommend that you don't fuck with the women around military bases.

Physical_removal · 2017-09-13T14:38:25+00:00

Lol @ the unease in that thread when he talks about skin tone. It is amazing to me that people can be so anti-racist and politically correct that they can't discuss something so objective and physical as skin tone. My god. How weird would it be if we did the same for hair color or eyes?

ponchato · 2017-09-14T01:08:55+00:00

I love how you would literally get banned for saying this stuff

I am not denying the possibility that your wife's story is true... But I am suspicious, because it's full of holes. Her reaction to the ordeal is very, very strange if what she's telling you is the truth. It seems she is actually supporting her rapist and their illegitimate child.

It sounds like she's been all too happy to shower her rapist with financial aid and visits.

Okay, aside from all the comments about the dubiousness of whether or not your wife was assaulted or complicit in the creation of this kid - neither here nor there, kid exists.

I hate to be a skeptic, but are you sure the story of the baby's conception is true? Because there are plenty of reasons to think it might not be, most significantly the fact she doesn't seem angry or hurt by this. Of course, sexual assault is complicated and different people react differently ... but it sounds like she isn't reacting at all.

But because the genders are reversed, it's 100% a-okay. And this last one here, good lord.

pfff honestly i would consider leaving the chick, i dont believe the assault story for a second, i'm sorry.

/u/Stappern you are a certified, genuine bag of shit. Your response to someone being raped is literally "pfff just leave 'em"? Are you serious? That's the kind of shit I would expect from angry basement dwellers on /b/.

I really hope the mod team of /r/relationships handed out bans for this trash, but I'll betcha $5 they didn't do anything other than remove the thread.

I mean, the victim is a man. Who gives a shit, right?

PompousPrique · 2017-09-13T17:59:24+00:00

What a bunch of genuinely awful people. Words cannot describe how fucked that comment section is.

blkarcher77 · 2017-09-13T18:34:10+00:00

Beyond that, the way some of these people are talking about the kid, jesus christ. God forbid he be a good man, and raise his child

_shikaka · 2017-09-14T00:36:49+00:00

Most of the people on that thread have no idea what they're talking about. Just look at the comments trying to get the rapist-in-question to admit it or it didn't happen ffs. My son was conceived because I was raped and I can see how men and women would deal with it in different ways emotionally if they are in that situation. It also doesn't make me the resident expert some people on that thread think they are. In my case I HAVE to accept child support from him. I never claimed for it and tried to refuse it, and csa said if I refuse to accept it I would get monitored as I would not be looking after him properly (because $7/week makes so much difference apparently). If a man fathers a child as a result of being raped he's still going to be expected to pay cs, proving that a rape occurred doesn't absolve legal parentage like was suggested multiple times. Dudes just trying to be a good dad in terms of wanting to spend time with his child and pay for things for him too. Also I have found in my situation my relationship to my son is much more complex. I don't know if that is a gender difference though.

pacmatt27 · 2017-09-13T21:06:06+00:00

The comments on that post make me feel physically sick. They're absolutely repulsive and a similar commentary on a female who was assaulted and raped would rightly be downvoted into oblivion. You'd be torn apart for saying some of the things they're saying on there.

As someone who works in mental health, the level of ignorance around trauma reactions in that thread is staggering. The level of ignorance toward male rape victims. The level of undeserved confidence around advising a vulnerable, emotional woman what she should do with her marriage and her unborn child is... Just... Horrible.

Man...

JestyerAverageJoe · 2017-09-13T18:26:21+00:00

This is fucking disgusting.

sooner2016 · 2017-09-13T22:32:36+00:00

Can't even read this fucking shit. I'm livid. I have been literally mocked for bringing anything close to this up as a hypothetical in any of my various "don't you dare rape people" classes (military). This shit has my blood boiling.

just_zhis_guy · 2017-09-14T11:52:20+00:00

r/relationships is one of the those I'm proud of being banned from.

AntiAbleism · 2017-09-13T21:09:07+00:00

Rape is rape. Gender shouldn't be a factor.

MR_Flarg · 2017-09-13T22:29:22+00:00

Somone needs to make a female version of this and see what happens

Change the chick getting pregnant to the victim getting a pregnancy test showing it's from someone else

Would be interesting to see what people say

MezzaCorux · 2017-09-13T22:44:44+00:00

They acting like women with rape babies don't sometimes still care about the kid.

camsprouse · 2017-09-14T01:21:10+00:00

It's crap like this that inspires me to become SANE (Sexual assault nurse examiner) certified as a future nurse. I know there are men out there who are raped or otherwise sexually abused. Being a male nurse, maybe I will be able to support them in a way they don't feel comfortable with a female nurse.

DarkDoesThings · 2017-09-13T21:42:44+00:00

Whaaaaat. Just because you are trying to treat the child who is yours like your kid doesn't mean you wanted to concieve said child.

Banana_Molester · 2017-09-13T21:58:49+00:00

I think it time for me to get a vasectomy.

Nubere008 · 2017-09-14T00:06:46+00:00

I read a similar discussion on Imgur in which a woman declared that men can not be raped because "men enjoy it, it doesn't hurt men like it does women".

Tooclosetokyle · 2017-09-14T06:23:40+00:00

Holy fuck, those comments are infuriating. What a bunch of fucktards.

dontsnap · 2017-09-14T03:46:46+00:00

Only bad dads get raped, everyone knows that.

It's why I'm the meanest pappy in the projects and I get all the pussy, even the pussy I don't want!

Now I ain't stupid, tryin' to be a good dad to all them dick sneezes, like this fool.

I tell them "Get the hell out of here, I ain't your daddy," just like my daddy told me.

DarkDoesThings · 2017-09-13T21:50:44+00:00

Some of these comments from the thread referwnced belong on r/MenKampf

Eryemil · 2017-09-13T23:44:41+00:00

Everyone involved in that thread is human garbage and the human race would be better off if they were all tossed into a sinkhole. Jesus on a stick.

viper12a1a · 2017-09-14T12:49:50+00:00

I want to be pissed off and angry....but i just feel sad. I'm doing my best to bring awareness to men and women's problems with each other and make sure people know that everyone has it terrible and that we should help whoever we can, but it just feels hopeless. Like I'm talking to a fucking wall. I don't feel like I'm accomplishing anything and since I physically fit the mra stereotype I'm constantly dismissed offhand. I know we're doing well overall, but feminism has really fucked things up....for everyone. Men and women. Just look at us....at each other's throats because they can't or won't stop lying and they won't take any responsibility for anything and we are constantly portrayed as some women hating cult.

Idk man, what the fuck is going on?

speaker_for_the_dead · 2017-09-14T12:54:45+00:00

Thank goodness you all saw it for what it really was.

5th_Law_of_Robotics · 2017-09-14T12:58:48+00:00

Don't tell the feminists or they'll be outraged over this actual rape culture and.... Ahahaha!

Yeah right.

CyanAlpaca · 2017-09-13T20:23:51+00:00

Im not sure anyone of the women there thought of this, but I feel like him doing everything she says is easier than outright deny in her what she wants. Why? Because all it takes is for her to say "He raped me!" And both of their lives are over. Husband goes to prison, Wife loses husband while a few months pregnant and she'll just be without because someone got vindictive and didnt get what she wanted. The guy's friend saw he was unconcious too, so WHY didnt he go in and tell her "Yo, get the fuck off him, he's knocked the fuck out!"? I'm confused by that part.

Dank_Meems · 2017-09-13T19:19:35+00:00

Go figure, a bunch of betas and females don't believe that a man got raped and has feelings. I wonder why men don't give a fuck anymore....Hmmmmmmmm, it's a mystery.............

MagicTampon · 2017-09-14T06:04:18+00:00

That guy needs to get a paternity test.

Basically at the party, a woman named Emma started talking to him, drugged his drink, and took advantage of him. My husband found out the day after because a friend told him he found him unconscious and saw earlier Emma on top of him on the bed but didn't realize it was him until later. Manuel didn't report her because he didn't want to "ruin her life" and so the law never got involved.

It's a little unclear to me whether the OP is precisely describing a rape.

Hard to know for sure if a drink was actually adulterated without toxicology to back it up. What the evidence for this?
His friend told him he saw him unconscious, but that earlier he saw the girl on top of him. Was he unconscious when she was on top of him? If not, was he legally incapacitated or just drunk?

Regardless, pretty shitty of the kid's mom not to undergo an abortion for a pregnancy conceived in this way.

Not saying that it was or was not a rape. I'm just saying, you can't really tell for sure aside from the claim made without specific arguments provided.

Unfortunately though, that seems to be the paradigm these days with victimhood -- listen and believe.

Except of course when the feminist doesn't like the conclusion that a man can be raped:

But I am suspicious, because it's full of holes.

His reaction to the ordeal is very, very strange if what he's telling you is the truth. It seems he is actually supporting his mistress and their illegitimate child.

I agree with you, the poster who said this is a complete idiot. Legally, the poor guy has literally no choice but to pay money to the woman. Basically, she's holding his child hostage.

Provided, of course, that it is his child. Which comes back again to the issue of the paternity test. Why was it not done?

Ignorant really, that it hasn't been.

The baby has his caramel skin tone and looks a lot like his baby pictures and she's white like me so I'm positive it's his baby as well.

And now we turn to so-called "comprehensive" sex education still allows such ignorance to persist & to go unchecked.

What the baby looks like is totally irrelevant. The only way to be sure that a child is the child of a man, is a DNA paternity test.

Unfortunately, so-called "comprehensive" sex education in liberal schools conspires to keep males as ignorant as possible about their rights and so-called responsibilities. Given that men are often lulled into thinking that they've been taught what they need to know ("comprehensive") when they've been kept ignorant all of the most important facts, it's safe to say the "comprehensive" sex education as provided by liberal school professors is worse than no sex education at all. No child should be given a false sense of security by being told they have been educated about something, when by design they are not.

BITCRUSHERRRR · 2017-09-13T22:49:29+00:00

They accuse him of cheating but women statistically cheat more and apparently men are raped as much/more than women

globalistissimo · 2017-09-14T08:48:00+00:00

There are legitimate reasons to doubt his story though ...

Corruptdead · 2017-09-14T11:50:05+00:00

Let's not forget the people in the comments making it about race.

-redditardation- · 2017-09-14T14:29:27+00:00

It's not blaming the victim when the victim is a man because men can't be victims.

Thank the SJWs for this, CURRENT YEAR of course

Good on the guy for not letting another person suffer because he himself has been hurt and wronged.

Jordioa18 · 2017-09-14T16:37:29+00:00

Seriously, the people doubting he got raped or implying the rape didn't really happen/was a rape, are legitimately bad fucking people.

Women get raped: "Listen and Believe! (C)"

Men get raped: "Was he really raped?", "This seems fabricated" ect ect.

PolkaDotGourd · 2017-09-14T19:12:50+00:00

In this case a propel gathering of information would be the first first of action

SocietopathyObserved · 2017-10-12T01:11:02+00:00

Oh my god, this very upvoted comment:

pfff honestly i would consider having an abortion and leaving the dude, i dont believe the assault story for a second, i'm sorry.

i think in this case the simplest solution is the right one, he got intoxicated, got laid and got the lady pregnant, with the help of a friend.

this whole thing looks like a shitfest, i don't think you deserve it, run.

There was another comment responding to someone else's skepticism that was all "Yeah, that was my immediate reaction too."

Woman makes allegation? LISTEN AND BELIEVE

Man makes allegation? "I don't believe it for a second, he was just stepping out." and "Yeah, skepticism was my first reaction too."

God dammit.

__Morgan_ · 2017-09-13T23:26:05+00:00

direct for mobile users: https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/6zt1ej/my_24f_3_months_pregnant_husbands_27m_abuser_25f/

CivilityBeDamned · 2017-09-13T20:00:28+00:00

Everything about that story sounds like pure bullshit, TBF.

The submitter should have dumped his ass when he wouldn't report the rape. Decided to hang around and stay in a relationship with someone who enables a rapist and wants to support and protect them? No fuckin way.

SolidMercer · 2022-02-16T15:38:41+00:00

It's disgusting they don't care about men who get raped but complain if we don't care about them.

A guy got raped and was forced to take responsibility for a kid he didn't want. People in r/relationship are doubting he was raped because he's trying to be a good dad.

Comments

InstitutionalSexism

WarOnWomen

InternalizedRape

Title	A guy got raped and was forced to take responsibility for a kid he didn't want. People in r/relationship are doubting he was raped because he's trying to be a good dad.
Author	JoelTLoUisBadass
Upvotes	2566
Comments	265
Date	September 13, 2017 2:00 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/6zupj1/a_guy_got_raped_and_was_forced_to_take/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/a-guy-got-raped-and-was-forced-to-take.914402 https://theredarchive.com/post/914402