alcohol and dating

Acaciduh · 2024-02-27T21:36:05+00:00

There’s plenty of places that are conducive to meeting people in social settings, sports clubs, hobby clubs, coffee shops, etc.

If you’re looking for casual sex though you’re going to have a rough go unless you’re hella attractive. Alcohol is the social lubrication that fuels casual sex and I don’t see that changing anytime soon.

Opening_Tell9388 · 2024-02-27T21:31:54+00:00

There is a traditional tea house in my city that feels like a bar but you're just having tea. You can get your own table, or sit at the community table. Meet some really cool people there.

-Shes-A-Carnival · 2024-02-27T21:32:02+00:00

of course it isn't, alcohol is the lubrication of dating and meeting strangers and casual sex. no wonder you people can't fuck

TotalTravesty · 2024-02-27T21:35:29+00:00

Some of my best first dates in terms of getting repeat dates and relationships started at a coffee shop. Maybe I just draw in non-drinkers (which would be odd since I don’t mind the occasional drink) but I’ve never once felt or been limited by non-drinking. Once you get out of college/youth you’ll find more people who don’t drink for whatever reason and nobody says boo about it because it’s pretty weird to judge another grownass man or woman for something so trivial.

Of course, if you’re most attracted to club girls and the club aesthetic you can’t be surprised if you think the only way to date are in bars. Not that I’m accusing you of that.

By the way, pretty shitty to blame alcohol for DV, SA, DUI, etc. Drinking doesn’t make people violent and stupid. Stupidity and a propensity toward violence makes people violent and stupid. Those who can drink responsibly don’t need to be held responsible for those who can’t.

Roadsidepeekneek · 2024-02-27T21:52:14+00:00

this is an ineffective way to ask what some third places are that dont have alcohol, lol

Safinated · 2024-02-27T21:40:32+00:00

I’ve met all the people I dated in social/activity groups, education, or work

No alcohol required

axolotofpain · 2024-02-27T22:16:05+00:00

Congrats on the three years of sobriety.

There are many other places and activities, but I think this stems from people not pursuing communal spaces for your hobbies or interests. (Though knowing PPD, I want to specify: these are not for cold approaching. These places are best for warm approaches).

I have a friend who is dating someone they met from a running group.

Another that is married to someone who they met in an improv class.

And another is dating someone they met at the bookstore by making small talk with the cashier every other weekend.

I have three friends that are dating people they met over discord.

Of course, this extends further than dating and works with friendships too.

My brother has made multiple friends from a local coffee shop he goes to that does has mic night for poetry and music. I've made friends from surfing, gaming, and being active in art communities. My friends started playing pickleball and make new friends by going on the weekends.

Siliconmage76 · 2024-02-28T00:09:53+00:00

Well you obviously have a problem.with alcohol and got sober and I think that's a wonderful thing.

But most of us don't have a problem with it, drink responsibly and it is the best social lubricant to enable people to loosen up and have fun.

Sorry that alcohol isn't for you.

Zabadoodude · 2024-02-28T03:54:43+00:00

I don't think it's weird at all. Alcohol lowers inhibitions and is lots of fun in social settings for most people. Some people have issues controlling their drinking, and have to quit it completely or go off the deep end. Then they act like there's something wrong with the rest of us having a couple drinks now and then.

Lift_and_Lurk · 2024-02-27T21:28:09+00:00

There are coffee bars and cafes that work as “singles spots” for a lot of people. It’s just not as loos as let’s be real- people like to use alcohol to “loosen up”. And sometimes be able to use it as an excuse for bad behavior

neinhaltchad · 2024-02-28T05:48:27+00:00

Jesus.

Another day another thread asking Gen Z terminally online style questions such as “why does alcohols make sex?”

Yeah just ignore that it’s been used to lower inhibitions and “get out of your head” for 3000 years.

Now suddenly, it’s a big mystery to people in the last 10 years 😂

This is another one of those conversations you’ll see online that you’ll never once see take place (outside of AA) IRL.

People drink because it makes flirting easier.

Especially men who have the burden of facing rejection.

operajunkie · 2024-02-28T00:09:28+00:00

I don’t drink much. I’ve been uninvited on dates by guys in the past when they realize I won’t go to a bar with them as a first date. It seems their entire strategy relies on impaired judgment.

justforlulz12345 · 2024-02-28T13:41:20+00:00

Because alcohol is a social lubricant. You aren’t going to get the same kind of connection.

Also DUI is a conspiracy to mass arrest people for the bureaucratic tax collection, just like speeding tickets. DV doesn’t happen at bars, it happens at home. “SA” is hugely overblown and usually, what happens is girls get too drunk and blame it on getting “spiked” after they regret their drunk decisions.

I’m gonna take a shot for you (I don’t give a shit that it’s 8 AM)

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bzl33 · 2024-02-27T21:42:07+00:00

it's a cultural thing, cultural things don't need to make sense. Meeting a new stranger at a coffee shop or a club feels closer to a job interview, maybe because I've met people for non-romantic purposes at those sorts of places.

MongoBobalossus · 2024-02-27T22:02:49+00:00

Coffee shops are great non-alcoholic places that offer a similar atmosphere to a bar.

tacticaltossaway · 2024-02-27T22:10:56+00:00

why is there no socially acceptable place that fills the same role as a bar, that DOESNT serve alcohol?

In dating? No. But most card shops are just bars for people who don't drink.

januaryphilosopher · 2024-02-27T22:37:25+00:00

That's called a coffee shop? Like it's not exactly the same because people are, you know, completely sober and will behave sober but it's a place for socialising with a drink.

dacution · 2024-02-27T22:47:11+00:00

That’s what it takes for the average guy to approach a woman

spicytuna12391 · 2024-02-27T23:02:44+00:00

No I don't think it's weird.

I'm a bartender, so I'm biased also.

Few_Advertising3430 · 2024-02-27T23:44:25+00:00

Not really, one drink is fine for most people. Bars are not the only options though, there are coffee shops, casual restaurants

TRTGymBro · 2024-02-28T00:47:31+00:00

You can meet women anywhere anytime. Stop being a bitch.

harmonica2 · 2024-02-28T01:10:52+00:00

I use to meet women in bars when I was single, but I didn't have alcohole and just drank soda almost all the time. Could you do that?

MistyMaisel · 2024-02-28T03:33:07+00:00

MMA Gym.

FutureBannedAccount2 · 2024-02-28T18:01:00+00:00

why is there no socially acceptable place that fills the same role as a bar, that DOESNT serve alcohol?

Have you heard of hobbies?

Title	alcohol and dating
Author	Roadsidepeekneek
Upvotes	9
Comments	100
Date	February 27, 2024 9:24 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1b1nhcx/alcohol_and_dating/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/alcohol-and-dating.1246614 https://theredarchive.com/post/1246614

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