askTRP Megathread March 28

MarcosDomingues · 2018-03-28T16:29:34+00:00

How does one become better at conversations? It's not that I don't know how to talk, it's just that I always black out and have nothing to say, especially if I were to approach a girl, which I end up never doing because I'm afraid of remaining silent and turning things awkward.

MentORPHEUS · 2018-03-28T14:23:55+00:00

This is a bit embarrassing but whatever.

So I stopped watching porn a couple years ago and limited myself to jerking off once a week. In general I feel much more in control and clear headed, and I notice I have more intensity in my lifts. The problem is that now I bust really fast the first few times with a new girl. I thought this would go away as my n-count increased (which is not great but not terrible either at around 40 or 50), and as I got older (early 30's now), but I still only last maybe 30 seconds. I can go a few more rounds after that and it's not quite as bad but my stamina still sucks.

Any tips?

Store_Front_Door · 2018-03-28T14:39:06+00:00

How do you regain passion to lift? I've been doing for over six years and at this point it's mandatory, but nothing more. I don't really enjoy it and the "afterglow" doesn't last for very long. I go in, do the routine and leave. Last time I was excited for gym was when I bought a new PWO. Any tips?

ddado2 · 2018-03-28T13:38:29+00:00

I’m a new convert. Still reading The Rational Male and browsing the forums. Thought I’d say hello :-)

Cmdrj-nice · 2018-03-28T16:01:42+00:00

Ok am new here and I want to increase my n count from 0. Am currently in college and I do lift

lovs2spuge · 2018-03-28T14:02:18+00:00

What's TRP's take on bringing a plate/date to weddings?

Buddy of mine is getting married in a couple months and I am groomsman. Id try and go after a bridesmaid, since they're the most vulnerable ones there, but most of them are in LTR's or aren't above a 5.

TruthSeekaaaaa · 2018-03-28T18:21:58+00:00

It's Xmas, the girl you are seeing since 2 months, opens up the present and discovers a lingerie. She proceeds to dress it and she sends you a pic of her nice ass. You are 10 miles away, with your friends, you have seen many pics like that, so in order to get excited you need something more, so you made some good comments but nothing groundbreaking and continue to enjoy the night. The very next day, the girl confesses that since you weren't enthusiastic she sent the same pic to another guy, looking for validation (she highlighted she did it only because of your behaviour). You don't know who the guy is or whether her story is true. Could be a shit test? How do you respond?

notfirstnotlast1 · 2018-03-28T17:42:39+00:00

tldr: What do you do to be self confident?

I was in a travel, met a girl on tinder, she knew that it was the last night of my trip. We met in real, I did all those blue pill things like buying all of her drinks, paying for taxi, opening and closing car door for her etc. At around 3 AM I asked if she will come to my room but she rejected and I brought her to her hotel and it is done. It hit me so bad, the next day I asked her kindly what was the turn off for her and she told "You are a handsome guy but you need to be more confident". This is not the first time I heard this confidence thing.

The thing is, people can feel when you have a self confidence issue deep down. I have an above average height, earning a nice amount, I am fit etc. and I tell myself that I am self confident but in somewhere deep I care about what other people thinks about what I say, how I look etc. so much and I guess it makes me self conscious. Generally I cant hold a fun conversation with guys too, I just feel that they are not as much interested in talking with me as their other friends.

Has anybody been there? What should I do to feel completely confident? Some suggestions would be nice I guess.

CharCanDo · 2018-03-29T17:14:09+00:00

On RP philosophy:

Tell me impressions of my impression.

The only thing I sacrifice for is self improvement, things that add value. Look for opportunities to test my frame physically and mentally, and opt into hardship.

Women are a net drain on personal value, and subconsciously they know and respect this. Be inclusive and welcoming into the parts of my life and with the types of women where and with whom I have learned to mitigate this value drain, but cut them loose and show no patience or suffering of infractions upon my value that I don’t consent to.

Sure you can sleep in, but we’re going to fuck when you get up. Don’t want to hike? That’s fine, I’ll be back around 2. I’ll be horny.

Re shit tests:

It seems to me, holistically that the best response is to simply tune them out and ignore them, and make a point to change the subject so they know they’re being ignored. If insisted upon, a curt and stone cold 1-2 word disapproval accompanied by internalizing AWALT to diffuse any resentment for it.

These observations are based very much on the POV of someone who is not a power talker. I can understand it. Maybe I can speak it. But I am having much more success in getting the reality I want by investing in frame control, and my most natural frame is very much no-bullshitting. To get into it now seems to me to expose a weakness unnecessarily - opposite views welcome, but my consideration has been thorough.

trexgomez · 2018-03-28T21:32:54+00:00

How to turn down a fat friend?

So I don't really discriminate and prejudge who I should talk to, and that gets me to about 3-4 women every year who are fat and totally into me so much that they'd ask me out despite me rejecting them previously.

CharCanDo · 2018-03-28T18:42:11+00:00

Cognitive dissonance on one part of game.

Approach, and outcome independence. One seems to invalidate the other, trying to reconcile leads to situational discomfort. I suspect the answer has something to do with baiting her out with harmless surface level comment, while maintaining “I’m the one to fuck here” frame. Any comments from people who get it appreciated.

nicholson- · 2018-03-28T20:30:09+00:00

How do you maintain a committed serious LTR whilst still being red-pill to the average young woman in 2018?

Subject_Of_Tharja · 2018-03-30T05:43:40+00:00

Is all this really necessary just to get hookups and relationships? I've been reading around here and I'm hearing terms thrown around like "Female Social Matrix" and the "Social Hierarchy" and I just have to ask: is any of this really necessary to getting females?

Are you really telling me that females pay attention to all of these micro-actions and details and evaluate males based off of small things like that? Do I really need to learn things like "Bitch Management & Teasing" or "How To Dodge A Shit-Test" or "How To Neg A 10?"

No, I'm not saying that everything here is pointless, but it all just seems really advanced and complicated and it also seems like it takes the fun out of doing things. I do enjoy reading Blue Pill Examples and I do enjoy the philosophy of The Red Pill, but both reddit Seduction and this subreddit make dating look more advanced then college-level Calculus.

And I'm not even going to go after 10s or 9s. I don't find them attractive. I'd much rather go after a 5 or a 4 or hell, I find myself somewhat more attracted to landwhales than I am to girls that look like models. Does any of TRP's advice apply to someone like me in that case, and even if it does, how much of it really applies?

lostbuthopefull · 2018-03-28T13:32:28+00:00

I wanna hit the town on my own for the first time, and hopefully make it a semi-regular thing. Any pointers for getting over the fear?

trexgomez · 2018-03-28T21:13:39+00:00

How do I stop being obsessed with getting girls nudes? I don't jack off to them but to me they are like a personal achievement. Like when a girl sends you her private photos I feel like I accomplished something meaningful even though I know I will never jerk off to it. Sometimes I don't even want to have sex with the girl but I still ask lol.

TruthSeekaaaaa · 2018-03-28T22:43:56+00:00

I got some problems with the Briffault's Law due to language barrier... can someone explain me in another way the quote below?

A promise of future benefit has limited influence on current/future association, with the influence inversely proportionate to the length of time until the benefit will be given and directly proportionate to the degree to which the female trusts the male (which is not bloody likely).

voyager14 · 2018-03-29T02:16:33+00:00

My best friend is wasting his time and money on girls for 3-4 months, then moving to another girl. Not fucking them to my knowledge. I tell him “why do you spend so much money on these girls you won’t care about in a few months” and he says he likes “the adventure” or some shit like that. Doesn’t make sense to me.

Should I try harder to get him into TRP or just let him do his thing?

Lousycabbage · 2018-03-29T04:11:16+00:00

Tl:dr How do I tell a plate that that is all she'll ever be?

One of my plates is getting a bit too obsessive. Messaging me like hell and calling me when she's drunk. I've got better things to do than listen to her drunk talk at 1 in the night. How do I explain to her that a plate is all she'll ever be? ( To add to the context, she stays 3hrs away from me so we don't meet every weekend)

RotBoy · 2018-03-30T03:37:33+00:00

How do you respond if you next a girl and then she asks you why you stopped talking to her?

civilizedfrog · 2018-03-30T07:59:53+00:00

My 4 year ltr (soon to be ex-ltr) never kept any password on her phone. However recently she has been on her phone a lot and she has a long password. I know this is a major red flag. I should have known there are no unicorns, just mutated donkeys. However I want to read her messages before completely blocking her ass for wasting my time. What to do?

zyqkvx · 2018-03-28T17:23:41+00:00

Is tipping waitresses that pay you lip service, then completely ignore your table bluepill?

keysomea · 2018-03-29T00:15:04+00:00

Im in the second year of med school and last semester I was approaching a lot of girls in the lower semesters. I had low SMV and they probably thought I was a creep and talked bad about me to other girls due to that and now they hate me or cant stand me at all and that diminishes my chances with others girls. My SMV got a bit better but how I can change the way these girls see me and don't let it affect my chances with other chicks ?

KeineStrategie · 2018-03-29T21:51:51+00:00

High School, is cold approaching a good idea? How much damage would it do if two girls found out I used the exact same opener(mistake in the past) to start a conversation(but idiot-me walked away when they froze up to being approached anxiety?) I've approached 8-12 girls this year, its not enough- should I start being careless about who I approach?

theHyperCasual · 2018-03-29T04:34:37+00:00

Tips on gaming a shy girl (possibly virgin)?

nate-bone · 2018-03-29T07:40:12+00:00

Thoughts on starting a new job and fitting in with work mates Never had an issue hitting my target (sales) and so used to old role with great relationships Now feel I must prove myself to be in the ‘tribe’ and naturally want to learn off the best in there Any ideas ?

s1mon7-7 · 2018-03-29T08:00:36+00:00

Hey TRP I am struggeling with my SMW. I am almost 19 years of age and have been powerlifting for almost 4 years and earned at 2nd place at Worlds last year. I am quite big and i dress accordingy. Yet i still feel like an average Joe when i am out. I know i look good, but i feel small if that makes sense, and this could lead to confidence problems i suppose. How should i work around this? 186cm (6ft 1), 92kg(202lbs) ~11% bf to give you an idea

tiredofthisweenie987 · 2018-03-29T17:09:15+00:00

So my wife and I have almost been married two years (I know don't get married yada yada). She agreed to take my name before we tied the knot. Big surprise here: she didnt. She kept saying "later" for months. Months turn to years. Maybe a year in I threatened divorce over it and she did the whole 9 crying and shit. I pussied out and figured maybe I could "prove my name worthy of taking" (beta as fuck, yeah). I'm very good with money, good at my job, respected, stay in shape etc. I didn't care too much because she does treat me well, spends a lot of money on me, genuinely cares. This month i think about it again and it bothers me (I hamstered).

I asked her when she's going to change it and tell her I want a definite answer. She replies "well since you want to know so bad, no I'm not going to change it and I changed my mind". I felt betrayed, and lied to. I went nuclear and told her she can change it or she can have her name on her own. She asked if this meant divorce, I replied "If you refuse to take my name, then yes that's what I want". I'm dead serious this time. I feel humiliated for waiting so long. But I'm extremely young (20s), no major assets, no kids. I have nothing to lose. Any advice or similar experiences?

reychip · 2018-03-29T16:07:57+00:00

How do you find a job when no-one replies back to you,even though you have decent experience?

TruthSeekaaaaa · 2018-03-29T16:22:20+00:00

I'm preparing to go full monk mode and I read an article on Illimitableman that shows what we should focus on. According to the Maslow's hierarchy of needs, sex is one of the most important (which is different from sexual intimacy). Does it mean we should masturbate a lot or I'm missing something? Anyway this insight is going against the nofap theory, which I don't know what's TRP option. Can someone help me out?

Insendi · 2018-03-29T21:09:38+00:00

How can I work push pull if I’m overly affectionate? After finding RP and getting with the girls I’ve gotten I can’t help but be really affectionate

fdsaf12351243 · 2018-03-29T22:30:24+00:00

I met a girl yesterday. Went on a date, really talkative, a lot of IOIs, ended up making out with her on the beach. I leave to another country for a month on tuesday and i wont be able to meet her again until I come back in May. My question is, should i talk to her at all during my stay in the other country? Or just send her some pics occasionally?Just so she doesnt forget about me? Any tips? And thanks in advance :)

MrMankookoo · Fri Mar 30 1:48:13 2018 UTC

I want to join TRP community, how do I begin?

hiperhiper · 2018-03-30T13:14:29+00:00

Dating girl - should I push back on restaurant reservation?

I am dating this girl which I met on Tinder. We met once, then I didn't texted back and she came back to me saying it was good meeting me. I asked her out again and I suggested a good restaurant. She said, "if this one is that good as you say", shouldn't we get a reservation? I said yes. Then she said, tell me once you get it. Then I started thinking, shouldn't I push back and tell her to make the reservation herself? Is this a shit-test? I'm new to the red pill. However, I do have the feeling that the girl sometimes is testing me if she can be bossy with me.

spnger4life · 2018-03-30T04:26:06+00:00

I am in my mid 20s. I am working towards becoming an adult and independent, but most days feel like a standstill, as in I seem to be improving but there are times when I fail and it hurts to be told your not trying hard enough when you feel like you are. How can I guarantee improvement everyday, or at least overcome this part of me that says I cant do it?

SgtRimjob · Fri Mar 30 12:14:41 2018 UTC

Just went through a breakup and looking for a new fitness routine as I re-embrace TRP. My goals are mostly aesthetics, as well as just good health.

For convenience and cost, I'd like to just use my work gym for now. Unfortunately, it doesn't include barbells but essentially everything else you can think of. This is probably a good thing, as my fitness level has plummeted and I feel like I'm just starting again. So it might be best to get back in the swing of things before jumping into big lifts like on a SL 5x5 type routine. Plus I have some skinny fat I'd like to shed before considering a bulk.

RotBoy · 2018-04-03T02:26:16+00:00

My friend group stopped making an effort to do shit with me, because I get in arguments with the short tempered AMOG because he dislikes my new redpill worldview/behavior. He no longer invites me to anything, and everyone is always hanging out with him, despite me making plans before he does-- everyone just bails and goes to his house. Thing is, I've been friends with these people my whole life, I'm 16 currently. I feel like the right thing to do is ditch them/confront them, but I'm not sure how to go about it without being a retard. I don't have any other groups I'm integrated in to flock to, so I'd need to figure out how to get in new groups or make my own. I don't know how really since I've been in one group since elementary school. What should I do? Can I command respect and salvage it, should I go overboard?

SpiritualEnvironment · 2018-03-28T18:21:46+00:00

I've asked this a few times now and not seen a response, but does anyone know why I can't browse by clicking "Red Pill Example" or "Blue Pill Example" on the sidebar any more? It takes you to a search filtered by flair:'rp' or flair:'bp', both of which have no results.

All the other flairs work just fine. Did the flair code for these two categories change or something? If so, what is the new one?

buttgoogler · 2018-03-28T22:25:37+00:00

What's your thoughts on cheating women, folks? I know TRP is not a place for "that one girl i know", but thing is despite me having no troubles in managing single girls, escalating and laying, everytime i think of doing the same with a taken woman i have no clue on how to approach the situation. Might as well add that her marriage is falling apart and her man is a total wimp, so i don't even care much. Thanks in advance for every opinion.

randomperson123321 · 2018-03-29T03:44:40+00:00

Is it me or PUA and "game" resources made men far more aggressive in the last 20 years or so?
There has been an alarming increase in people who go full autistic on you around here. Like, guy puts his hand on you, you push it back, he insists, you push back again, he insists... etc.

[deleted] · 2018-03-29T03:14:30+00:00

How would you guys feel about a men's sub but with less hate for women?

Title	askTRP Megathread March 28
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	30
Comments	209
Date	March 28, 2018 1:09 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/87rrms/asktrp_megathread_march_28/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/asktrp-megathread-march-28.49412 https://theredarchive.com/post/49412

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