Does ignoring girls work?

garlopf · 2022-10-19T15:17:37+00:00

Many girls will try to make you into an orbiter. They will get your attention and give you attention just enough so that you stick around. A lot of guys will get confused asking themselves why she shows them interest one day and not the next. This is why.

Matilozano96 · 2022-10-19T16:09:39+00:00

I’d say don’t ignore her completely. Especially on campus. Say hi, talk casually, whatever.

Don’t initiate on social media unless she starts doing it first. Mirror her level of attention (or try doing her level of attention -1; that may work).

Don’t bring up meeting directly. Maybe mention your workouts or post about them, but let HER bring it up. The ball’s on her side on this one, tbh.

If she doesn’t, she’s not interested. Move on or just keep a casual acquaintance with no expectations.

Whatever you do, don’t show that you’re salty or concerned about the cancelled plans. Even better: don’t be.

ef2111 · 2022-10-19T15:38:35+00:00

Women thrive off of attention. Your validation is their supply. Use social media and your phone for meet-up logistics. If she flakes and doesn't commit, don't waste your time and move onto the next one. Either she'll hit you up, at which point you need to get a meet-up on the calendar, or you won't hear from her again. Ignoring girls may get you some results, but not from all of them.

Honestly, if you're trying to set something up and she flakes or doesn't commit, don't waste your energy on her. Keep it moving.

kob_dash · 2022-10-19T16:46:59+00:00

You are not a mind reader my guy, move on to other women. You didn't lose anything, you are still alive and happy.

TimGreen_1888 · 2022-10-19T17:10:56+00:00

It only works if she’s attracted to you. If she’s not, nothing works.

tristian_lay · 2022-10-19T16:02:11+00:00

Ignoring girls only works if she’s already attracted to you but she has to give in at some level in order to progress forward or it’s just a game. Have fun with it and snap some gym stories with you and a random girl or somethjng

ColombianNova · 2022-10-19T18:17:53+00:00

No no no no no.

Show interest. Not neediness. If she likes you she will respond well from the first time.

If you didn't hit it off, then just move her to friend category and look for others.

Would you ignore your friend?

kphoenix137 · 2022-10-19T15:34:04+00:00

Its more about the end result. How you get there can ruin or for you or make it better. If you're ignoring girls because you're actually busy, yes it works. If you're ignoring girls to play games because you're desperate and want them to like you, it will work but will probably backfire

GeezRick · 2022-10-19T16:36:33+00:00

It only works if she already wants you. Basically, it’s more of an amplifier than an actual cause of attraction. Most normal women don’t care for the attention of guys they don’t want.

ChampionshipStock870 · 2022-10-19T16:29:01+00:00

Ignoring women is a risky proposal especially with online dating. It used to be ignoring girls worked pretty well because unless they’re constantly getting hit on in public, usually their choices are limited.

If you’re ignoring a girl that has 1200 matches on tinder you’re begging to get forgotten completely.

In those situations a lot of men prefer the push/pull method. You give them large amounts of attention at once, make them feel special, then you pull back. You have to make yourself unforgettable

roakmamba · 2022-10-19T18:56:44+00:00

Next time she hits you up schedule a date and if she comes out with some bullshit then tell her to hyu once she's figured out her schedule and do not reach out until she does and when does assume she's down to hang because that's what you stated and if she flakes again disregard her because she's just bullshitting and probably wants attention or validation.

demonspawn9 · 2022-10-19T18:24:39+00:00

I don't know what you are into, but the type of girl that would respond to being ignored, isn't going to be the most stable person. There are insecurity issues and if they are very persistent, it's a red flag. What you have said makes me think she's the take it slow type and may think you are as well. Feel this one out, don't keep ignoring her, her response now is going to be important in determining what you are dealing with.

tastless_chill_tonic · 2022-10-19T15:07:38+00:00

each situation is different,

make the call yourself, at the best time, and you will either succeed or fail, if failed, don't get desperate, just get learned

99Perfect99 · 2022-10-19T18:03:58+00:00

When a guy ignores me for a long time, I lose interest and move on. I like consistency because I’m that way if I’m interested and I always make it clear when I’m interested or not interested in someone that pursues me. Playing games is so exhausting but there are men and women out there that enjoy it which is a waste of energy. I don’t get it at all. 😑

Longjumping-Bug-4383 · 2022-10-19T17:12:28+00:00

For me it’s just the reverse. I just unfollowed the dude on Instagram and his phone number too. Look man, I’m trying to get laid and I’m already making it easy for you by setting the stage but if you still wanna play games, I do not have time and energy to invest in you, afterall it’s limited energy.

thirdwallbreak · 2022-10-19T15:38:23+00:00

I don’t ignore girls, instead I make it known that their response or presence won’t effect me.

If you’re going to work out then go do that regardless.

You want to be someone that others want to be around. But you do not want to be someone that needs other people to be around them.

You can invite people to hang out with you, but also make sure it’s not coming off as desperate.

The_Entertainer217 · 2022-10-19T17:34:23+00:00

Kind of. This is nuanced. If you ignore her TOO much she might lose interest and just move on. What seems to work best is to be inconsistent and also work on a frame you like.

For example, I prefer when women call me over texting. So if a woman texts me, I’m in no hurry to get back to her, once in a very great while I will text right back, but hardly ever and especially not in the early stages. However if she calls me I will usually answer or call back pretty shortly after if I am able. So most women who actually want to get ahold of me know she has to call, I prefer this and it fits into my frame better. Also it’s more convenient for me because I can talk while I’m doing other things.

So yes, ignoring can work if you don’t overdo it and it seems natural and like you’re just busy. It helps a lot if you are actually busy.

samk002001 · 2022-10-19T19:28:15+00:00

Move on! She’s not interested of you but just want you to be around. You’re wasting your time

bmunger718 · 2022-10-19T21:57:53+00:00

A man I’ve been in an exact same situation as you. Many girls are wonderful actors just because she seems interested does not mean she is unless it comes with her doing work like meeting up with you. As you get older you will be able to dissect cues of women more easier. But from experience when a women wants you she makes it easy for you. You won’t have problems seeking dates or anything she’s gonna reach out. The problem either she has a dude or just not that into it fuck it there’s always another one.

Scorchyy · 2022-10-19T22:22:59+00:00

I've had that before with young girls, they'll even send you a snap of their face, basically fishing for compliments or attention, just ignore it completely, you won't get anything from those girls

breakbelowHL · 2022-10-19T17:50:37+00:00

Be direct. Tell her you think she is beautiful and that you want to be more than gym friends with her. Then tell her a time and place where you will meet her for a date. If she declines, then move on. You save a lot of effort this way.

hittinlicks247 · 2022-10-19T19:30:33+00:00

I think a lot of people believe this. And it does work. It’s just very context dependent.

For it to work, first the girl has to like you. Then your absence will make her think about you more and want to hang out more. Bonus points if she sees you having fun on social media in the meantime.

Turning her down might make her want you more if every time she asks you out you have a valid excuse for not being able to hang out (you’ve got basketball practice or a work meeting for example - something that can’t be easily moved).

Someone else mentioned that maybe she wants you as an “orbiter”. If you want to avoid becoming an orbiter it’s easy. You like the girl, you make a move, she doesn’t reciprocate, you move on.

Ariannanoel · 2022-10-19T20:14:00+00:00

Ask her to the event and then carry on ignoring her if you want her to go.

I wouldn’t ignore her completely though.. maybe send one text a day “hope you have a great day/ had a great day”

Sinstormm · 2022-10-19T18:17:34+00:00

Ignoring girls absolutely works, assuming the goal is to not talk to them. Otherwise, not so much

jenkinsonfire · 2022-10-19T18:26:52+00:00

That’s shitty behaviour on her end and I personally wouldn’t give her the time of day. The best thing to do is call her out on this behaviour

ctrain6676 · 2022-10-19T18:49:40+00:00

Yes.

Ribbet537 · 2022-10-19T19:12:06+00:00

It's not necessarily "ignoring" them, ignoring is intentionally not talking to them. That's just rude. It is more like you don't have time to keep bending your schedule to them and you're just putting in as much effort as they are. If she starts talking to you talk to her, if she stops talking to you stop talking to her. That simple, it's not a game you play.

Thin_Violinist · 2022-10-19T19:51:00+00:00

It definitely decreases the potential imo. If it’s to save money though then if you’re young I’d recommend it. That’s what I’m doing. 💰over 🐱until I’m older and more developed as a man.

chocolatekitt · 2022-10-19T19:58:25+00:00

For me? Never. If a guy doesn’t talk to me, I might reach out once to see what’s up, but that’s it. I don’t chase, nor does any self respecting woman. Some younger women with self esteem issues and codependency will likely ruminate on your lack of attention, which is what I suppose you’re after, someone who is easily manipulated. Makes for a pretty irritating time, though.

RedPillAlphaBigCock · 2022-10-19T20:17:46+00:00

I’d say when you see her in person , flirt with her , if she reciprocates , then you need to ask for the close . If it’s a no this time , leave her

caesarfecit · 2022-10-19T21:12:00+00:00

As a tactic? No.

Why? Because if it works, odds are she's in your orbit for the wrong reasons. Ask me how I know this.

The right question to ask is why would you ignore a girl, and why should you/shouldn't you?

The right time to ignore a girl is when you're done with her and she knows it (i.e. going no contact or nexting her) or when she's clearly crossed boundaries and won't be accountable (i.e. ghosting, flaking, etc).

The wrong time to ignore a girl is when you're trying to get to know her. There, the move is to interact with her, with purpose, and don't be needy. Don't give her your full attention until she's invested and working for it but don't hold back either unless you want to send her the wrong message. Nothing encourages a girl to play games like you playing games.

Point is, that if ignoring a girl is a successful tactic with her, either she has low self-esteem and needs to chase guys she's interested in, she's not interested enough, she's trying to play you, or she's kind of a mess and has accountability issues.

When you get really good, you can playfully ignore her, or tease her by making her work for your attention, but this requires experience to know what kind of girls respond to that well, and to know when you're going too far.

OJSimpsons · 2022-10-19T21:35:33+00:00

If you're young enough, maybe.

Striking-Panic3120 · 2022-10-19T21:39:31+00:00

When you give her your attention you lose keep it pushing

TheTruth221 · 2022-10-19T21:42:10+00:00

yeah ignoring is good

ChicoBrillo · 2022-10-19T21:47:26+00:00

Mm ignoring can work but not always. I think people in general are attracted to those who are in their own lane and have a sense of direction.

When you’re too available it can show that you don’t have anything going on.

Ignoring can make you appear like that person, but it won’t work that well if you don’t actually have that confidence and direction yourself

Thin-Cartoonist-9485 · 2022-10-19T22:32:08+00:00

If yourvgay it would work well. Ignoring is usually the result of ignorance

blessedbelly · 2022-10-19T22:34:23+00:00

No. Be yourself, If it’s meant to be, it’s meant to be. If it isn’t, it isn’t.

Gaydame · 2022-10-19T23:07:34+00:00

A lot of these posts come down to: "This girl is playing games with me. I hate people who play games.

How do I outgame her?"

Karmacosmik · 2022-10-19T23:17:15+00:00

Don’t waste your time and energy. Most likely you are not the only one she plays those games with

thekidwhoruns · 2022-10-19T23:20:05+00:00

From my experience the ignoring" tactic only works if you've already had sex/hooked up with the girl.

Playing distant/hard to get after hooking up is what landed me my current girlfriend. :)

Electronic-Thanks-84 · 2022-10-19T23:21:01+00:00

No, don’t do that or they will just move on to a different guy. They have many options

neversleeps212 · 2022-10-19T23:59:59+00:00

The technical term here is breadcrumbing. She’s dropping you a little trail of breadcrumbs to keep you following after her but she’s not interested in you as a primary romantic or sexual partner. You’re really just the fallback to her backup plans.

There’s nothing wrong with continuing to stay in touch a little bit and seeing if anything further develops but don’t expend mental, physical, or emotional energy pursuing someone who, at least at this point in time, has you very much on the back burner.

Title	Does ignoring girls work?
Author	Glittering_Fan_3223
Upvotes	125
Comments	112
Date	October 19, 2022 3:03 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/y852u0/does_ignoring_girls_work/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/does-ignoring-girls-work.1248099 https://theredarchive.com/post/1248099

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