QfW Most Common Ways you Signal Interest

SirTruffleberry · 2021-11-01T02:29:30+00:00

A girl at work who had never talked to me until that point started telling me dead baby jokes after learning that I like dark humor. Kind of a dead giveaway lol.

Mrs_Drgree · 2021-10-30T14:15:13+00:00

[permanently deleted]

philomexa · 2021-10-30T14:30:04+00:00

I signaled interest to my husband by always being in his vicinity, laughing the loudest at his jokes, perpetual giggling, flirty eyes, and I'd take an active interest in his stories/anecdotes long after the social group had moved on, which gave us an excuse to have 1 on 1 conversations and develop our own inside jokes.

When I brought him dinner and hung out with him watching movies after his surgery despite the crew going to a party that night, I think that's when it clicked for him.

cruciod · 2021-10-30T16:10:02+00:00

Elongated eye contact. Smiling a lot at him. Laughing at all his jokes even if they're not funny. "Halfway" checking him out (like only his top half) because doing it all the way is too obvious. Finding ways to touch him (e.g. hand on shoulder, arm, etc.) if the situation allows it. Getting up in his personal space a little and seeing how he reacts. Getting close to him and holding eye contact. Escalating if feeling bold.

I think the most subtle sign would just be noticing their presence frequently and even in crowded areas. Like making eye contact in a crowded room/bus right away and holding it longer than you normally would with someone you just recognize. But this is very subtle and moreso something you do subconsciously almost, you don't really expect the guy to pick up on it.

CimZim · 2021-10-30T14:11:44+00:00

Back when I was still dating I did not use any signals. Honestly I find the idea of doing things like flirting around, brushing your hair, averting your your eyes, and similar things to be a waste of time.

When I want someone to know that I was interested in dating them I came out and said so.. I will gave him a compliment, usually based on something in their profile or the way that they look, and then I will talk to them for a few hours and would try to make a plan for a coffee or similar date very early on.

SqueaksScreech · 2021-10-30T14:50:38+00:00

Casually ask them on a date or tell them

Willow-girl · 2021-10-30T15:33:18+00:00

Usually I stick my hand down their pants.

Subtle, I am not.

Cupcakelover1985 · 2021-10-30T15:13:10+00:00

I’ll Compliment them, strike up a conversation about something I know they’re into, little gifts.

I think most men notice the signals I drop because they’re obvious. They just don’t act because they’re not interested. Then I take the hint and move on. For the ones who were interested they flirt back and return the energy and build up to asking me out.

Orange_Paisley · 2021-10-30T16:10:09+00:00

One guy I gave a copy of my favorite book.

1Here4Bach · 2021-10-30T14:09:18+00:00

Standing there looking pretty. A fish will bite eventually.

UrFoodMolestedMyNose · 2021-10-30T16:57:27+00:00

Lingering around him. Finding any excuse to be where he is and be part of whatever he’s doing. Suddenly you see me a lot more and there’s no real reason for it.

A big one is he will likely catch me looking at him. When I say looking I mean “ there’s no reason for her to be looking at me this much wait did I have ketchup on my face... everyday this week?”. I think this is more obvious though if I knew the guy previously as they would be able to better pick up on the shift.

Loosening of boundaries and trying to evoke certain ideas in his head.

Probably the most subtle thing I do. Suddenly I don’t immediately adjust or change topics away in response to suggestive situations and will sometimes attempt to get him initiate them by making a comment that I know could be spun into a sexual comment or joke by him but at the same time not look like that was my intention by having it be relating it to the situation. Basically present more opportunities for him to make those kinds of jokes, see if he bites.

if you knew I did this stuff you’d notice that I will actually engage with the comment by laughing and or making joking comments of my own.

This is in contrast with how I typically act with men I’m not interested. In those situations I kind of avoid anything that might confuse him into thinking I like him or am open to anything more than friendship. There will be far fewer potentially “leading” comments and the ones they manage to make from genuine comments made will be shut down as soon as socially acceptably possible.

Once I was hanging out with a friend and her new friend who was a guy. We were talking about anime. I mentioned an anime I’d Heard people talk about being good but I didn’t know was well known for its main characters huge tits. He laughs and makes a comment about the character having big tits (he uses the Japanese word for tits). At this point I ask what that word was, the guy proceeds point at my boobs and say while standing a little too close for comfort : “ you have (word for boob)’s”.

Now, If I had a crush on him or liked him in that way I probably would have laughed and jokingly asserted that mine were bigger than said character or something.

However what ended up happening was no one laughed and I ended up breaking the silence by asking if he spoke Japanese or just picked up words for anime then quickly mentioning one of me and my friends past teachers used to speak Japanese and was xyz. Subject changed to crazy teachers.

ashpr0ulx · 2021-10-30T14:20:02+00:00

i tease the shit out of men i like. basically like a small child on a playground

nemporisso · 2021-10-30T16:04:44+00:00

I'll probably ignore you.

With one guy I just wouldn't leave him alone. But I was down especially bad

januaryphilosopher · 2021-10-30T16:43:50+00:00

If I don't want to indicate interest directly, I'm not going to "signal" interest indirectly either. If I want someone to know I'm into them, I might as well ask them out.

JacobMoogberg69 · 2021-10-30T18:46:44+00:00

Women approach men all the time, but not in the "hey baby, you come here often?" type of ways. It's usually looking at him, smiling, hovering around him, making an excuse to ask him something, dancing or bending over in his line of sight, etc. all men need to do is be aware of these (focus and lay attention ie pull your head out of your ass) signals and walk through the open doors confidently and bravely.

superlurkage · 2021-10-30T15:11:45+00:00

I remove the barriers to interaction which most women put up as a given

That’s plenty

Ohms2North · 2021-10-30T16:37:37+00:00

I’m not big on flirting, but when I like a guy I make them a lot of food. I cook dinner and drop it off for them, bake pies/cookies, whatever they seem to like. And I like doing little things to surprise them, like getting them a gift about some obscure thing they mentioned or whatever. If they seem stressed out, I’ll help them out with something, or buy them coffee, that kinda stuff.

I think it gets missed a lot and they just assume I’m being friendly lol. But at least it makes their day better.

(This is just for dating obviously. Not tryin to cook dinner for somebody for something casual.)

vial_of_music · 2021-10-30T21:04:07+00:00

more touching, sitting closer, talking while our faces our closer together etc

most men i can just kind of give them a look? if that makes sense. I can read their response as well. non verbal cues are really it

snowcakey · 2021-10-30T15:39:55+00:00

I make eye contact with them and that’s about all I need to do.

babyslutfreak · 2021-10-30T14:15:37+00:00

I spoke to them at all.

I don’t keep male friends because they are always either wanting/open to fucking or wanting to date and if I’m in a relationship, I can’t really abide that.

flapperfemmefatale · 2021-10-30T17:04:47+00:00

I got my husband's attention by sitting on his lap at a party.

EDIT:... I think. I had been going after him for months before this, and I think this was the moment he actually noticed me. It could have been before. I'd have to ask

catsinbananahats · 2021-10-30T15:14:43+00:00

I just admire them from a distance and hope that one day my feelings may be requited. Eventually, I come to terms with the fact they don't like me in that way and I move on.

Never have told a person directly that I like them. Only ever asked people to tell them or kept my feelings to myself.

rft24 · 2021-10-30T15:42:04+00:00

eye contact, held for 3 or more seconds. looking at the guy several times. smiling at him. winking at him. trying to get closer to him. finding literally any excuse to talk to him. talking to him more than anyone else or any other men around. compulsive giggling.

the men who detected it would just approach eventually, the majority didn’t need me to do more than smile or wink tho. the ones who didn’t realize just kept doing whatever they were doing lol

idk what’s the most obvious they missed because to me, all but just making simple eye contact seems obvious enough to me. if you catch me looking at you several times, making eye contact more than 3 times, smiling and winking at you, giggling nonstop, being wherever you are, and going out of my way to talk to you unnecessarily or more than anyone else; then i’d think it’s more than obvious that i’m interested.

if you still can’t tell, then you either can’t read social cues for shit or you’re just not interested lol

chubbybutt22 · 2021-10-30T16:11:07+00:00

I’m pretty upfront about it so sometimes I’ll just ask them to have sex.

Flightlessbirbz · 2021-10-30T16:42:40+00:00

I normally let them lead and just be available and receptive. Laugh at their jokes, smile more, learn about their interests. One time I went out of my way to show up where I knew a guy I liked would be, multiple times, and tbh I wouldn’t even do that again. He had previously initiated, but in retrospect was losing interest and I didn’t see that, so I ended up getting used and wasting time. I should’ve trusted my gut and stepped back instead. That’s the problem with pursuing men even subtly, they will rarely ever reject you straight up. It’s “why not?” in their minds. Even if they aren’t into you they figure they still might get free pussy. So don’t.

Cheshiregrin85 · 2021-10-30T20:13:55+00:00

Smile and make direct eye contact,I never did the "pretend to be demure or nervous" looking down hair touching thing.

SaBahRub · 2021-10-30T16:04:21+00:00

Interacting with a man whenever possible and not rejecting him

If he doesn’t pursue, he’s not interested. If he overpursues, he’s not listening to me and thus not compatible

Never had an issue with this system

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Flintblood · 2021-10-31T02:10:22+00:00

Thanks for all the open answers. I hope to respond to some of them soon.

j_sc0tt · 2021-11-07T17:23:19+00:00

I'm gonna go out against the norm and say that you know when somebody likes you, because you can feel the chemistry. It's this electricity that happens between two people who really vibe with each other.

Mimoxs · 2021-10-30T17:34:44+00:00

I don't it's his job to be interested and show interest and if he doesn't then too bad, someone eventually will

Edit actually sometimes attempt to torture them emotionally in terms of teasing them to the point of them trying something bc they think they're picking up on signals, then pretend I was not doing that/play dumb to it, and hope for a reaction. This has not worked so far though. I had a boy I "soft" rejected this way, he just gave up and stopped talking to me. Which was sad bc he seemed like the creepy incel type. If he had disregarded the rejection and kept trying anyway or gotten forceful I would have dated him

rilakkumkum · 2021-10-30T17:12:06+00:00

Spending time with him, and I make it obvious I find something attractive about him by telling him

JazziestCabbage · 2021-10-30T18:11:39+00:00

Play fighting

Title	QfW Most Common Ways you Signal Interest
Author	Flintblood
Upvotes	22
Comments	128
Date	October 30, 2021 2:04 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/qj25j4/qfw_most_common_ways_you_signal_interest/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/qfw-most-common-ways-you-signal-interest.1080968 https://theredarchive.com/post/1080968

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