“Cuddling”

Ana_jp · 2021-12-11T19:35:48+00:00

I miss just making out.

IAteTheDragon · 2021-12-11T20:06:24+00:00

Cuddling is so intimate and feels so warm and lovely... until there comes the inevitable moment of the POKING. Poking against your leg, back or belly, if you know what I mean😐You suddenly realize the cuddle is not to be respected as a deep intimate moment by itself, and the poor guy just has to, i repeat, HAS. TO. react to his hard-on AT ALL TIMES.

DiosaCordilia · 2021-12-11T18:29:45+00:00

Yup. I would rather cuddle most of the time but I always felt pressure and got pressured into sex.

Junior-Lion7893 · 2021-12-11T20:38:08+00:00

Should have known what it meant. Waaay back when, I agreed to cuddling and suddenly his hand was underneath my bra.

all_or_nothing_bet · 2021-12-11T17:59:20+00:00

True cuddling that doesn't lead to sex is very intimate and is only possible between two very close relatives (parent-child), with ypur pet or with your SO. Definitely not with someone you've just recently started dating or a hookup.

"Looking for a cuddling partner" is a code for "looking for a booty call".

aquietsword · 2021-12-11T20:48:39+00:00

Wait, what? This is a code word? But men are so sTrAiGhTfOrWaRd and don't play gAmEs and would NEVER expect you to just read his mind that he really just wants sex. I'm so bewildered.

katiekat0214 · 2021-12-12T02:00:33+00:00

I've actually asked men, do you mean actually snuggle up together, watch a movie, eat together, chat some, have you tickle my back (best thing ever), then call it a night? Or do you mean snuggle up then you make a move and initiate sex? Silence, every damn time, so I go, OH OK, so you mean the latter.

One time trying to cOmMuNiCaTe, I asked, do you realize you would get more sex if you offered more touch without strings and expectations? Silence again, so no, he did not realize that. We did not last long, can't even remember his name. College, 20s, thank you next.

highoncatnipbrownies · 2021-12-11T20:28:29+00:00

And the word message means lay still while I grope you untill I feel like sex.. which you will give because I was nice enough to grope I mean message you!!!!

faultierin · 2021-12-11T21:02:45+00:00

Their OLD profiles: I love cuddling/looking for somebody to cuddle.

Always by a techbro with a beard and a stupid pfp with his mouth open

purasangria · 2021-12-11T18:48:17+00:00

Don't cuddle with men, cuddle your kids and pets.

bluemexicanblanket · 2021-12-11T21:43:11+00:00

this guy i’m dating actually cuddled me yesterday and it didn’t lead to anything and it was so comforting and nice. i felt really safe and comfortable.

mashibeans · 2021-12-11T23:59:13+00:00

What haven't they ruined?

Hang out: a data hopefully leading to you giving me some head/sex

Netflix and chill: pretty much "doordash yourself to my place for some sex"

Cuddle: making out followed my sex

A walk/coffee: no effort date hopefully leading to sex SOON (either on that "date" or the next)

Lots of phrases/words used on the current dating scene (and hell, even outside the dating scene) from men to women, have been thoroughly ruined by men. It's really gross that us women have to fucking decipher what they actually mean. Lots of passive aggressiveness, roundabouts, double meanings... Men are truly the sex that manipulates and lies with words. They've always tried to make it look like us women are "worse" because we use "psychological warfare" and are the passive aggressive ones, when they're the fucking kings of both. Absolute projection.

thanarealnobody · 2021-12-11T22:11:26+00:00

Every single time a guy has cuddled me, he has put his hand on my breast and tried to initiate sex. Most times I just gave into it.

Now I honestly just don’t trust any act of physical intimacy.

_queeeen_ · 2021-12-11T21:56:26+00:00

They're down to good faith cuddle AFTERWARDS. Before is always a prelude.

anotherdamnloser · 2021-12-12T04:43:40+00:00

So true though. I’ve never been cuddled by a man unless it’s after sex or they want sex or they lure you with it for sex.

legoflowers · 2021-12-12T09:44:47+00:00

I now hate being cuddled by men. They’re fucking BAD at it. They hold their arms at strange pokey angles, they lay on my hair, then they ask for sex. Shudder.

wonkyeyes8877 · 2021-12-12T01:12:59+00:00

Or if he does actually just want to cuddle, it's his weight on mine, bending my neck, putting pressure on my chest, making me sweaty and miserable and he fully expects me to be cute and fall asleep with this crap happening to me. No.

QueenAlice3 · 2021-12-11T21:39:38+00:00

I always equate guys who say they like cuddling with guys who can’t keep their hands to theimselves. Or octopuses as I affectionately think of them. /s

Novemberinthechair · 2021-12-11T20:40:25+00:00

Obviously code for fucking, yeah. But on another level, I hate that word coming out of a guy's mouth because it sounds so juvenile and effeminate.

rightsun__ · 2021-12-11T18:06:55+00:00

Also on people using cuddling as code for sex is that to me it feels very evasive and immature (clarifying that I’m saying the way many men use this not actual cuddling itself).

I’ve had a grown man ask for a re-hook up by saying “lets cuddle” and it’s like, we both know you mean sex so why don’t you just say that. It felt like he was too shy to say the “S word” and it got on my nerves - if you’re going to play me at least be direct 🙄

Title	“Cuddling”
Author	basicbiddy
Upvotes	646
Comments	44
Date	December 11, 2021 5:46 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/re4tfa/cuddling/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/cuddling.1087423 https://theredarchive.com/post/1087423

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