Interested in women. But what’s a turn off/red flag for you?

Stonks4sport · 2022-02-16T17:16:07+00:00

1) Knowledge of astrology 2) Acting as if astrology has any bearing on human life 3) Vocalizing her beliefs in astrology, and taking offense at the scoffing that immediately occurs from listeners

AdultishRaktajino · 2022-02-16T17:46:47+00:00

MLM boss babe shit. Nope.

chichinfu · 2022-02-16T11:16:54+00:00

Single mother
Jobless
Broke 4 . Narcissistic

azwildcat74 · 2022-02-16T14:09:47+00:00

Refers to her ex as “abusive” or “narcissistic” early and often. Not to minimize women who were actually physically abused but that’s such a TINY number of the women who make these claims it’s crazy and they’re usually not the ones to talk about it.

someoneelseiknow · 2022-02-16T08:43:43+00:00

Immature, no job, always late

CaliDude75 · 2022-02-16T15:04:06+00:00

My STBXW is a textbook example, hence why she’s about to be my STBXW.

1) Bad listener: Only cares about taking about herself, her needs, her interests, her desires.

2) Verbal diarrhea/freight train: Just never stops talking. And not about interesting stuff, just boring, inane drivel, constantly…

3) Only makes token effort in the relationship: Only helps out with chores/domestic duties when it’s brought up as an issue, and then wants a participation trophy when she does.

4) Flying off the handle over insignificant things: Case-in-point, my STBXW went into a fit of rage when I used a paper plate to heat some food that she was going to use for a family dinner. It’s just a freakin’ paper plate, for crying out loud! 😳

5) Makes little to no effort to make new friends: Bump-on-a-log at social events, expects you to provide attention/entertainment to her all night. Overly-attached to parents/immediate family. 90% of her sentences start with “My mom said…”

6) No interest/passion in cooking: I’m not talking about the toxic masculinity/misogynistic “Make me dinner, woman!” I’m talking about someone interested in coming beside you in the kitchen and cooking with you, or occasionally surprising you with an unexpected special meal, instead of summarily plopping herself on the couch and watching Bravo.

7) Poor hygiene/grooming: My wife somehow thinks just idly standing under the shower head without lathering and scrubbing is somehow “showering.” She also neglects her feet, and has an untreated nail fungus issue she’s done nothing about. As an admitted “foot guy” this is a major turn-off.

I could go on and on, but those are the biggies. You can bet I’m going to be a lot more particular/discerning the next time around!

Objective_Problem_90 · 2022-02-16T12:32:56+00:00

Bi-polar. Medicated or not. Perhaps they are indeed nice, good person. But no, just no. Not for me anymore

bacon-wrapped-steak · 2022-02-16T13:57:38+00:00

Isn't willing to make time for you. Treats you like a chore that has to be penciled into her day.

214speaking · 2022-02-16T18:41:21+00:00

Keeps talking about their ex and how much of an asshole they were in unrelated conversations

import_help · 2022-02-17T00:13:31+00:00

Inability to communicate. Don’t make me guess what’s in your head. I’ll certainly get it wrong, and then no one is happy.

Funny_Wolverine_9 · 2022-02-17T23:42:01+00:00

Single Moms.
Any woman who claims her ex was "abusive". This is a HUGE red flag. Stay away from these women as they know how to use the legal system against you.

25_years · 2022-02-16T11:12:57+00:00

baby daddy

Oh God. When I hear that, I think to myself: So much ghetto sperm has been pumped into her ass, it's starting to leak out of her mouth now. It's a horrible phrase.

Crushed_95 · 2022-02-16T12:01:37+00:00

Smokers both cigarettes and other substances. Tattoos. Now that I have a kid, no more than one baby daddy.

Busy-Recording-1911 · 2022-02-17T00:19:55+00:00

Mid 40s here and divorced. I’ve dated women since my divorce. I’ve been with the same woman for a year.

My biggest turn off is when a woman blames 100% of past relationship failures on her significant other. In very rare instances would I say it’s 100% the other person’s fault.

This was something that impressed me about my gf. When we spoke about our previous marriages she readily admitted her faults in the marriage. She spoke about his but made sure she took accountability for hers.

Even more impressive, she knows when some of those things surface in our relationship. Controlling, coming top of mind. When she acts controlling, she’ll apologize for her behavior.

RepresentativeOk5968 · 2022-02-16T14:28:49+00:00

Single mother and referring to ex as "baby daddy" is the hugest of huge red flags
Overly medicated for variety of conditions. If you're under age of 40, you shouldn't need to take 8 pills a day as a reasonably healthy human imo. Especially when most of them are for mental health.
Low wage or no job. Expects me to support them. Old me from 20 years ago was fine with this classic arrangement. Now that I'm older and wiser, I see how much it doesn't serve the modern man well. We get all the responsibility of a 1950s husband but none of the upsides.
Single mother (again). Seriously, just no.

Road_to_independence · 2022-02-16T13:40:16+00:00

Inability to engage in a decent conversation. After that (and closely connected), no personal interests or curiosity.

thedukeinc · 2022-02-16T14:46:25+00:00

being broke all the time Such a huge turn off. That is why I started seeing women when I starting dating with a basic question “if a dude has such and such qualities, will I be interested in hanging out”? Turns out not in many cases. Saved me a lot of time

Gxl4 · 2022-02-16T14:27:19+00:00

Playing the blame game.
increase the drama / high blood pressure situations
trying to compete with me financially
visible big tattoo’s
debt
Weird / fucked up friends.
on meds

cleats4u · 2022-02-17T15:16:35+00:00

Saying the words...Alpha Female.

Gattsama · 2022-02-16T14:41:15+00:00

Not in any order:

Single mother Tattoos Loud Most always be correct Woke Has huge amount of debt Overweight/obese No hobbies No plans Can't stop talking about Ex's Disagreeable Can not engage in conversation

But really if they are lacking: Agreeableness

teufelinderflasche · 2022-02-16T13:08:49+00:00

Tats are a red flag. It means she's been through the meat grinder.

Feinixaway · 2022-02-16T12:52:55+00:00

It depends, what age range are you looking at?

thatokeydokey · 2022-02-16T21:38:13+00:00

Has a vagina.

pegleg_legal · 2022-02-17T01:44:52+00:00

Turn offs for someone I'd consider a relationship with are very different than someone I'd date for a while. Not considering relationships atm.

astrocoazt · 2022-02-17T03:50:37+00:00

Codependency

syro23 · 2022-02-17T06:22:06+00:00

Why does every reply make me think OP just asked people to describe my ex wife?

derelictherds · 2022-02-17T22:45:32+00:00

Daddy issues
Inability or unwillingness to respect boundaries
Unemployed or under employed
Neediness
Laziness

NoMoarNonsese123 · 2022-02-19T18:08:29+00:00

Overly plucked eyebrows=crazy

This is doubly true if they plucked out their natural brows and drew new, thin ones with a makeup pencil, badly.

Drazicc85 · 2022-02-20T09:21:50+00:00

Divorced her last husband Massive red flag for me.

Single mother Hopeless romantics

Those are up there too.

TonLoc1281 · 2022-02-17T00:25:00+00:00

If she corrects your grammar while you’re talking.

Title	Interested in women. But what’s a turn off/red flag for you?
Author	SireSweet
Upvotes	14
Comments	73
Date	February 16, 2022 8:41 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/str3y6/interested_in_women_but_whats_a_turn_offred_flag/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/interested-in-women-but-whats-a-turn-offred-flag.1102001 https://theredarchive.com/post/1102001

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