Are women harsher than men when it comes to women's appearance?

Gingerchoco · 2023-01-19T22:17:41+00:00

I recall seeing an article from Psych Today or something which said women are harsher on both men’s and women’s appearances.

Correlates with me since I think I’m a good-looking guy and also think most people are good-looking when they put forward a small amount of effort.

howdoiw0rkthisthing · 2023-01-19T19:25:58+00:00

Women are harsher on the presentation (hair, makeup, outfit), softer on the body. For men it’s the opposite.

januaryphilosopher · 2023-01-19T19:36:29+00:00

Harsher on their own, kinder on others'. (At least to their faces, if they privately think another woman looks shit they're usually not as inclined as men to say it.)

AnyIntroduction3288 · 2023-01-19T21:58:35+00:00

Nope. Men are much harsher. I see old bald middle aged overweight men going out of their way to call celebrities who are a little chubby fat. I saw a guy on Facebook who looked like he was at least 60 saying that women over age 35 are undesirable. Selena Gomez posted a bikini photo and some old dudes were calling her obese.

I don’t see women doing this to the level and with the frequency that men do.

Lift_and_Lurk · 2023-01-19T19:50:44+00:00

Depends. If they like the person: no. They will be the most positive and uplifting they can. But if she’s an enemy or worse? Then watch the claws come out!

MistyMaisel · 2023-01-19T19:35:32+00:00

Depends on how you are talking?

If you mean in a very particular, miniscule details, fashion/clothing, hyper-nightmarishly aware way...yes. Obviously.

But on the other hand, I've never heard a woman refer to another woman who had children as stretched out, saggy-titted, or in any other way make light and harsh fun of such an appearance. That one seems to be exclusively the purview of men. Nor have I ever heard the term landwhale come out of a woman or butter-face. Never heard a woman go after flat chests, small butts, big butts, big titties, etc. And I've never heard a woman going after another woman for not looking 20 anymore and having some wrinkles. Men on the other hand...I mean, you don't have to go far to find them acting like a woman who has had a baby is used up or who has turned 30 is an old swamp hag.

And that's really the thing, right. Like, women are being catty to each other about essentially artistic sensibilities, societal expectations, etc. It's usually men that are going after the shit that leads to plastic surgery or decimates a woman's ability to see herself as attractive. And it is men's desires that are causing most of this insecurity. Not other women.

Other women are just enforcing what teenage gay boys on tik tok say is fashion. And this doesn't tend to cut as deep as a man attacking a post baby body.

(Yes, I think men should absolutely feel ashamed of themselves for a lot of this. Luckily, karma gets um in the end for it.)

KikiYuyu · 2023-01-20T05:52:17+00:00

I think the more a woman cares about her own appearance the more she'll notice the appearance of other women. If she holds herself to a super high standard, she might do the same for other women.

I live in sweatpants almost all the time so I'm not calling anyone out unless they look really crazy

AnUnstableNucleus · 2023-01-19T19:00:52+00:00

Yes.

/thread

BirdMedication · 2023-01-19T19:31:12+00:00

I think women are broadly defensive of women's appearance on the internet when they're engaged in feminist discussions against men, but in real life it's more complicated in that they have more personal incentive to judge other women's appearance for competitive reasons.

MasterTeacher123 · 2023-01-19T20:43:11+00:00

I remember dudes saying girls were just ugly or fat lol

Women would Just go into more detail when shitting on another woman. They broke it down to a science

dukesaces · 2023-01-20T03:49:07+00:00

Absolutely not! I see women gas up the most unattractive women and call them queens. Women are also a lot laxer on their rating of other women and will usually rate themselves and other women far higher than where they actually are. Women have a very high in group preference.

Birb-brained · 2023-01-19T19:36:59+00:00

I’ve heard it’s the case but in my personal life I don’t know many women like that.

Safinated · 2023-01-19T20:32:44+00:00

Yes, because we don’t want to fuck them. Any hole will not do

MiddleZealousideal89 · 2023-01-19T21:02:02+00:00

Teenage girls are brutal. Adult women? Not so much. I've never experienced women talking shit about another woman's looks other than maybe ''that color doesn't look good on her''. I'm certain in IG influencer/model/rich lady circles it can get very bitchy and catty but I haven't noticed your average woman acting like that. If anything, they're very supportive and will compliment you on your hair, your outfit, or your nails.

I've noticed that men tend to be a lot harsher. You're slim but you also have cellulite? You're a fat pig. You have small boobs? You look like a little boy. You have big boobs? You will be compared to a cow. You have any laugh lines or wrinkles? What an old hag! And this is without even having gone through pregnancy and childbirth. Then it turns to how ugly your saggy boobs and stretchmarks are. And that you're not losing the baby weight fast enough.

Obviously, it's not all men, I don't even think it's most men. But there are a lot of men, both online and IRL, who are very vocal about exactly what is wrong with some woman's looks. Bitchy women also exist but from my experience as a woman, it's not very common past a certain age/outside of certain circles.

Early-Christmas-4742 · 2023-01-19T19:46:10+00:00

Yes. And I believe men are harsher than women when it comes to men's appearance. We both obsess over traits the other sex doesn't pay much attention too

Lanzienator · 2023-01-19T19:51:57+00:00

Based on results from the thread rating women from 1-10, lots of men in this sub find 95% (if not more) of women to be ugly. And Emma Watson is plain lmao.

suj1290 · 2023-01-19T19:08:46+00:00

Yes and also women care about impressing other women more

Pathosgrim · 2023-01-19T19:02:28+00:00

Yes or else BBLs, Plastic Surgery and Makeup wouldn't be lucrative businesses

dontwaitliveyourlife · 2023-01-19T19:19:07+00:00

Most definitely yes

John_Oakman · 2023-01-19T19:25:22+00:00

More than most males but less than most relevant men. The sting from a single man with unreasonable standards is stronger than the reassurance of a hundred LVMs.

AstronautLoveShack · 2023-01-19T19:25:34+00:00

Definitely. The "mean girls" trope is pretty common IRL.

Throwaway-Que1713 · 2023-01-19T19:27:29+00:00

Women are harsher on other women in almost every scenario you can think of. It's really eye opening when you see it in a employment setting especially if the manager is a woman and a majority of workers are women.

WestCombSplit · 2023-01-19T20:34:45+00:00

Women are harsher on other women when it comes to things that are used to attract Men, and the same is true with Men. This is obvious because you're able to recognise the intricate details and mentality behind the things someone else is doing, if you're also doing the same thing. Also of course Men spend more time with other Men and therefore are more aware of Male nature in general, the same is true with Women

anonymous-platypus1 · 2023-01-19T19:22:52+00:00

Yes. Women are brought up to compare themselves constantly to other women. From magazines, to fashion to tv, we are told to look and see what others are doing, and how they can be successful looking a certain way.

We are then told we have to look a certain way to be worthy of a certain kind of person. And we should strive to look our best. Women that frequently don’t keep themselves up are talked about and judged.

96tillinfinity_ · 2023-01-19T21:31:45+00:00

Well. Theres a reason the cosmetic and plastic surgery business is dominated by women

That should give you your answer

Khabeni412 · 2023-01-21T09:20:15+00:00

Women are the harshest sex when it comes to appearance of men and women. Women expect all men to be rich models, whereas if you really get down to it and men were honest, any man would date any woman. But yes, women judge women more than men judge women.

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geometersbane · 2023-01-19T19:51:32+00:00

They downplay their own to appear modest (and for that sweet, sweet attention and validation that inevitably follows). And they throw every superlative in the dictionary at other girls but that's obviously just for optics.

jackedsoon · 2023-01-19T19:58:52+00:00

Judgement? Probs men. If she dont look good enough she wont have maybe guys into her/showing interest. We may not be more explicit and/or specific like women and mention ‘X doesnt have her makeup right today’ but we’ll not approach/swipe right which matters more to women who want a bf.

TheRedPillRipper · 2023-01-19T20:44:30+00:00

I’m not privy to women’s conversations in private, so don’t know. Publicly though, politeness, and civility, are still the norm.

Godspeed and good luck!

LowCreddit · 2023-01-19T21:04:09+00:00

Yes and no. Men and women have very different standards of beauty. Women forgive age. Men forgive clothes.

-michael-skarn- · 2023-01-19T22:33:13+00:00

My perception is probably skewed because my older sibling managed recruitment and social media for her sorrority. The stuff I got to hear was pretty intense.

Hoopy223 · 2023-01-19T23:17:16+00:00

My experience is that women take it to a much higher level. Even in the adult world.

PapaPinyun · 2023-01-20T00:13:16+00:00

I guess you don't read Camille Paglia huh

2023-01-20T09:16:16+00:00

To anything, clothes, slutiness, career, lack of career.

Women (and toothless men) are just petty little creatures.

Zombombaby · 2023-01-20T15:45:26+00:00

This is an individual issue, not a gender one. I've seen group chats from dudes tearing other dudes and women apart. I've seen women be catty and mean to each other. Heck, go on any woman's Instagram page or tiktok and there are dudes just ragging on women while she's being entirely unproblematic (in, talking about her job, her hobbies, her life experience, or talking about a subject she's fascinated by, etc). And there's dudes just completely losing it that a non-conventionally beautiful woman is happy.

I've had more men be complete asses about my appearance than any woman has been to be fair. But again, I know women aren't exempt from this behavior as well.

Optimal_Fig7538 · 2023-01-20T18:48:22+00:00

considering every single woman on planet earth thinks shes a 7 or above: probably not.

DisasterPeace7 · 2023-01-20T19:21:04+00:00

They're definitely harsher on the presentation and package, if your shoes aren't right, if she's taller than you, if you're outfit isn't great, etc.,

2023-01-20T20:51:57+00:00

Absolutely not. Women consistently overrate other women.

angypanda123 · 2023-01-20T23:59:49+00:00

Women that care a lot about appearance (clothes, makeup, hair) will be harsher with judging other women’s appearance. However it’s mostly how a woman grooms herself based on societal expectations. For example a decade ago when I was in high school straight hair and skinny jeans were the fashion trend, if girls didn’t have it they’d be judged in school for it, mostly by other girls. Men are obviously harsher at judging a women’s body and how how attractive she is.

Square-Pie9671 · 2023-01-21T01:27:08+00:00

no, they just use completely different metrics. a woman judges mostly how put together another woman is or how she dresses, and is heavily influenced by how much she likes that woman as a person.

I have argued with women and they always rate people they like unreasonably high, and the ones they dont like unreasonably low, meaning they are not honest.

Kore624 · 2023-01-21T09:57:03+00:00

This sub is full of men saying women become old hags once they hit 25 and they laugh at body positivity that women overwhelmingly support.

Title	Are women harsher than men when it comes to women's appearance?
Author	abundance-lover
Upvotes	18
Comments	129
Date	January 19, 2023 6:54 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/10g9ut7/are_women_harsher_than_men_when_it_comes_to/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/are-women-harsher-than-men-when-it-comes-to-womens.1149718 https://theredarchive.com/post/1149718

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