Truth is that men are judged compared to other men, and most women prefer traits in men that only a few men have. Most men are somewhat in between, and they can get lucky, but they will never have as much power of choice as women. Even those men who get a wife, they may find that she ask for divorce because "love went away", and he may lose all the investment in the relationship, and women are more likely to do such thing.

Truth is that the hypergamous reality of fewer men being desirable, undermines monogamy. Those chosen men will have more power to choose women, have side chicks, etc. The problem I find is that most women seem to have a fixation for monogamy and commitment, and most of them believe they are worthy of it, while mathematically speaking it is unlikely most women will find and keep for them alone the man they truly desire and love.

Of course, some women would rather choose to be alone, and I expect more men choosing VR porn or similar technology to avoid real life relationships and release urges. Sure, not the ideal for people who want a relationship, but truth is that plenty of people prefer to stay alone than choosing a person that is not what they want.

The only solution I find is women dropping the idea of them being entitled to monogamy, or at least accept they don't have much power over the top men they choose, because other women choose them too. Nothing wrong with that: no group has all power and control on everything in a specific category such as sexual selection. Women should not be mad as this, since they still have it waaay better than most men, and it is clear that plenty of women choose to be a side chick to a desirable man than a woman of an average man. They just hide it for social rejection or false ideas of non-monogamous arrangements.

TLDR: Women should not look down on being a side chick, or even the idea of the men they choose having other partners. It is a numbers game, and the least men are desirable, the most power for the men they do choose, and if men can choose other women, then will... just as women choose better men.