[FR] She doubled down on polyamory and has been summarily nexted.

buster2209 · 2014-12-31T15:31:42+00:00

I have one restriction I place on my girl; monogamy. If she breaks that, we're done.

Some things you can let slide, but core foundations have to be rigidly enforced.

Good for you...

TimPartendale · 2014-12-31T15:18:49+00:00

She tries once again to make you jealous and then the crying ensues because she realized you called her bluff. Stay strong. Avoid the floods of "I'm sorry"/"I love you texts" and let all those calls hit voicemail... in fact, block her number. Ride out the storm by doing so in between another girl's legs.

Sandkasten · 2014-12-31T15:32:39+00:00

There you have it, OP. You are in bed and she's bringing it up again, like the last time. Same situation. You know why? Because you were not clear enough last time. She remembered the last time when she had a small success and tries this manipulative approach. This time you were consistent.

cazbot · 2014-12-31T18:29:20+00:00

Not to be OT but I would have nexted her right at this sentence.

homeopathic treatment for my cat

ConfidenceMatters · 2014-12-31T16:58:51+00:00

Give it a month or so, ignore hardcore, go out and smash like a madman and then invite her over randomly for polyamorous activities (FFM threeway, duh)

Archwinger · 2014-12-31T16:54:48+00:00

Breaking up on New Year’s isn’t a bad policy. It’s a few months too inefficient, though. Labor Day is the perfect time to break up.

If you do it on Labor Day, you can pump all the slutty superheroines, cats, and firewomen in hooker heels that you meet at drunken Halloween parties, you don’t have to spend Thanksgiving meeting her fucked-up family, you don’t have to buy her a Christmas gift, you can pound some more sluts at New Year’s parties, you don’t have to buy her a Valentine’s gift, and come March when spring love is in the air, you can meet a new girlfriend for six months of spring-summer sexing. Then dump her ass next Labor Day.

Bonus is finding a girl with a fall/winter birthday so you don't have to waste money on a birthday gift.

GhostInTheRedPill · 2014-12-31T15:24:33+00:00

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Doomsday_ · 2014-12-31T17:12:29+00:00

For exclusivity to work at all, the girl has to want it a lot more than you. She should be the one trying to lock you down with mateguarding. The second she isn't, it's done.

Buchloe · 2014-12-31T17:22:26+00:00

Yeah. Homeopathy for a cat. Pretty much guaranteed to lead to polyamory conversations. did we date the same chick?

Cronyx · 2014-12-31T14:52:44+00:00

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WhiteTrashInTrouble · 2014-12-31T16:18:47+00:00

homeopathic treatment for my cat to treat her jealousy. Maybe I should get some for you too."

I got a hearty chuckle of this.

idrivesmallcars · 2014-12-31T16:28:08+00:00

I would have told her fine, get one of your girlfriends over here and lets do this thing

Whisper · 2014-12-31T18:53:05+00:00

This is what a good field report should be. Straight, to the point, illustrate the principle.

And the principle, in this case, is that you only have any relationship you are willing to walk away from. If you are not, that relationship has you.

♂

vandaalen · 2014-12-31T18:22:16+00:00

Her: "[blah, blah]...homeopathic treatment for my cat to treat her jealousy. Maybe I should get some for you too."

That's actually a great line, that I am totally going to use on a plate in the future.

Thanks.

RiseAboveRuin · 2015-01-01T02:42:21+00:00

Is it wrong that I have an open relationship with 3 separate girls? Maybe it's beta if said dude wants a relationship with said woman, but I love my open relationships. Zero drama. I've never gotten into a single fight or argument with any of them. It's understood that I do my business and they do theirs and we don't talk about it to each other. It's understood that I'm not ready to settle down yet and we're just doing the tango because we enjoy each other's company. It's no different than a FWB deal. You can't be pissed at the girl for fucking another dude if you're just FWB. This whole polyamory thing, I've never heard it phrased that way, works for some and not for others. It's only beta of you to not next her if this is something you're not looking for. I for one enjoy sleeping with 3 different girls though and like to be able to still keep looking, guilt free, without ever having to explain myself to anyone where I was on any given night.

FagMuffin · 2014-12-31T17:39:54+00:00

Why not just keep her as a plate and fuck other girls? If I had a hot chick I was hooking up with that didn't care if I fucked other girls that would be fine by me!

Carbrohygoat · 2014-12-31T22:30:06+00:00

Homeopathic treatment for her cat to treat it's jealousy? What were you doing with this crazy bitch in the first place?

HeinousFu_kery · 2014-12-31T20:00:01+00:00

So long as you were straightforward about it ahead of time, it's all good.

She wants "polyamory"? The poly people I know have multiple real relationships - think polygamy/polyandry without the "I do" part. Too complicated for me, but I don't judge. She just heard that word somewhere.

She wants to fuck a lot of people, and there's a difference. What she wants is polysexuality - lots of sex from all directions. Nothing wrong with that*, but you two don't match up.

Tell her that you consider polyamory a good idea, but polysexuality is even better and you're taking it up. If she asks where she stands, tell her that she's just gone to the very end of your list, which is a very long and noisy one.

Then put her number on the reject list.

*Edit: Beyond the usual health, safety and liability issues that apply to anyone.

MirthSpindle · 2015-01-01T04:07:07+00:00

I'd leave her (if she doesn't want to discuss the validity of homeopathy) just for being into homeopathy to treat a cat's jealousy.

OrpheusV · 2014-12-31T17:05:51+00:00

There's a reason in any relationship I set boundaries. They wanna break boundaries, I'm going to just say "We're done" and that's it. If you're letting a guest into your fortress, you'd expect them to follow rules set out.

If I want an open relationship, they can either respect my wishes and/or be on the same page, or get out. Conversely, if we both want something serious, I expect her to not fuck other dudes. Fairly reasonable shit.

That said, it's new year's eve. Go hook up.

Set some boundaries, and kick anyone who doesn't respect them out.

thereddespair · 2014-12-31T15:47:09+00:00

I like that he is honest with her in sentiment and clear on reasons. She seemed to have taken it bitterly, not constructive.

Glenbert · 2014-12-31T19:37:10+00:00

Good for you brother man. That's a one way ticket to cuck city. Something like this can really throw a guy off. I hope I could be as direct if this ever came up with my LTR

Quansau18 · 2014-12-31T21:42:27+00:00

This post makes me think of a devils advocate-ish question, if your girl knows you aren't exclusive with her, and she's going out and fucking other dudes on the DL, wouldn't it be the same? Is the poly thing just more annoying because of the clarity KNOWING she's boning other dudes, rather than just thinking she might be? Either way she's getting other dicks put in her, one case she's just lying about it though. Thoughts?

AlphaMilady · 2014-12-31T22:32:50+00:00

She probably already was banging other guys and looking to justify it by suggesting polyamory. Might wanna get an std test.

throwawaybeginner · 2014-12-31T22:44:15+00:00

That's fucking awesome man.

john-b · 2015-01-01T02:19:17+00:00

I respect & admire your commitment to being a man. One of my good friends sadly is the beta you had described. He recently attended his ex-girlfriends house for a christmas dinner on christmas day. When I asked why, he said not going would have made him seem like an asshole, because after all his insane crazy ex-gf bought him gifts, so he felt like he owed her. I could only cringe hard.

His crazy ex keeps telling him she loves him, and keeps hanging around in a similar way a pathetic male beta would. My friend currently has no one else so he entertains her and allows her to come over regularly where they of course have sex, but he also engages in the pillow talk & romantic touching.

blue_27 · 2015-01-01T00:44:22+00:00

Oh yeah, that's a simple one. My girl can fuck one guy, and one guy only. My ex-girl can fuck anyone she wants.

FrameWalker · 2014-12-31T16:34:36+00:00

This is one of the hardest things to wrestle with. I suspect it will be a long time before any plate gets upgraded.

antariusz · 2014-12-31T23:32:27+00:00

She likely had someone else that she thought she'd be able to pull into a long-term relationship, stay resolved. If she wants to get back with you, it only means that he turned her down, probably after fucking her.

Source: had the exact same thing happen to me multiple times.

LifeAtPeace · 2015-01-01T05:32:49+00:00

Well done dude. Do not look back at her or you will be the one in tears.

EurasianAesthetics · 2015-01-01T14:20:48+00:00

Beautiful work my friend, love it!

vicious_armbar · 2014-12-31T20:29:04+00:00

I know I'm going to get downvoted to hell, but I'll ask anyway. Why is TRP so opposed of open relationships? When you have a girl that is a booty call or fwb she's fucking other guys as well. No one seems to have a problem with that.

If as a man you decide to allow a relationship, and you still want to fuck other chicks; then what's wrong with an open relationship? As long as you maintain frame she'll be all over your dick anyway. And if you think that a flimsy unenforceable promise to "stay true" to you while you're in a monogamous relationship will stop her from fucking another guy if she wants to, then you're delusional. If she wants relationship status, then you can set the rules regarding outside people. It also opens the doors to a flood of new pussy by threesomes and swinging.

I don't know about other guys, but I could never be monogamous. I just love pussy too much!

MajorStyles · 2015-01-01T19:15:02+00:00

Good for you! Score a victory for team red pill!

Typical "modern" Western cubt. Passive-aggressive attack on her part. The whole "you're not man enough to accept my cuckulding". Then you alpha booted her straight out the door, and now she wants back in.

This is why there is NO gender equality. A man would never pull such bullshit.

Kite23 · 2014-12-31T18:33:50+00:00

Fucking sick, why the fuck do sluts think "its alright" Fuck that noise, good on you for leaving when you did!

MirthSpindle · 2014-12-31T18:00:17+00:00

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SinisterSilence · 2014-12-31T22:36:37+00:00

I really wish I had the balls to respond this way. Don't know why I continue to have a relationship with someone who wants to have sex with other people :(

botoxgoggles · 2014-12-31T21:22:26+00:00

I'm new to TRP and still working on swallowing it, but I have a similar situation with a plate, lets call her "Lucy".

On to the relevant part: Lucy's been dropping hints (I'm sure she thinks she's being subtle as hell, but its like someone dropping concrete plocks in a kiddie pool) about being polyamorous.

I see her attempts to work it into the conversation as either a) she's angling for a girlfriend upgrade (NOT happening. She's hot, objectively a HB8: 24, nice tits, great ass - her face is cute now, but it's one of those that will start to look "horsie" when she gets older, and a great lay. But she also has a ton of red flags - travelled abroad for a semester, fucked first date, 2 tattoos, gets drunk at bars and acts stupid) or, like mentioned here: b) trying to hamster not being called a slut while she fucks a lot of guys.

Last time she danced around the idea I told her, Fine - as long as I pick the guys.

I had one of those moments when Redpill just clicked: Lucy loved my response. My not gaf about her and treating her like a piece of meat I can use or give away made her insanely wet. She literally crawled across the floor to give me a BJ and kept calling herself my "toy".

I know the RP thing to do is next her, but honestly I like having her under my thumb. I have another girl I'm more interested in that I've been working on, but Lucy is my dependable kinky fuck. I like the idea of having a slut I can whore out. Yes, this is dark. But I think taking away her power to pick the guys counters her hypergamy.

Chobeat · 2015-01-01T13:48:59+00:00

Polyamorous here: you are not even close to the stability and maturity necessary for a poly relationship. It won't work. Also monogamous and non-monogamous people should never mix

goodboy · 2014-12-31T20:24:46+00:00

This is why one should only hook up with virgins.

tombreck2 · 2014-12-31T14:31:03+00:00

Could have avoided this by keeping texting for only logistics

scabbalicious · 2014-12-31T16:59:06+00:00

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pantsoffire · 2014-12-31T16:57:53+00:00

Well, I'm sorry to say once again... I arrive as a potentially interesting sub expires not with an explosive breath of "Freedom!" or a defiant refrain of "Give me liberty or give me death." I witness the whimper. And the pathetic resurrection via common consensus. Damn, should of contributed more. Or less. Fuck it.

We are self aware. And we are legion.

The march continues.

Title	[FR] She doubled down on polyamory and has been summarily nexted.
Author	GhostInTheRedPill
Upvotes	408
Comments	148
Date	December 31, 2014 2:24 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/2qx5ew/fr_she_doubled_down_on_polyamory_and_has_been/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/fr-she-doubled-down-on-polyamory-and-has-been.27224 https://theredarchive.com/post/27224

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