I've been thinking alot recently about how scrotes like to disparage women when they do anything for themselves that doesn't directly benefit them i.e. women having self-worth. It's a red flag they'll show pretty early on in a relationship because they can be subtle about it.

One that comes to mind for me personally is when my husband would mention me masturbating (in a negative connotation) anytime I wanted to take a bath. I have chronic migraines & headaches, so taking baths is my go to remedy for relieving the pain. He was a typical southern religious type who held the belief that masturbation is wrong, but even more so for women. His comments started subtley of course. He'd comment "Hope you have fun in there" even when I was very clearly sick with a migraine. Then he started saying outright that I "must be touching myself " because why else would I /need/ to take a bath? Eventually it escalated to him busting into the bathroom occasionally to try & "catch" me.

Me taking a bath did not directly affect him at all. I always did it when the kids were asleep, so he didn't have to watch them. But it bothered him immensely. Why? Because I was doing something for myself, without him, which meant I'm an autonomous person. Making my own decisions to do something for myself seemed outrageous to him because he needed to control me to keep all focus on him.

He also did this when I took one night to go celebrate a new friend's birthday after about a year of me not going out as a new mom to a 1 year old, with no friends. He brought up that one time again & again everytime we argued after that day, saying I had "abandoned our daughter". Nevermind the fact that he went out after work every week to get sh*t-faced & come home at ungodly hours. But that one single night to myself to him was unacceptable because he viewed me as something there to serve him, not a person who is allowed to have a life outside of being a mom & wife.

This also bled into other things. He'd get mad when I got into skincare citing that I shouldn't be wasting money on "useless stuff", yet he spent a ridiculous amount of money on alcohol, dip, cigarettes, and weed.

Anything you do soley for your benefit is seen as "selfish". Taking trips with your friends, spending any time doing "fun stuff" without him, working out, getting a job (when you were a Sahm) or finding a better one, getting new hobbies, etc. Basically anything that takes the focus off of them.

These red flags start small but eventually escalate as they become more entitled to you, your body, & your time.

Please share of any other red flags you all have seen, relating to LVM hating you having self-worth