Why are we so hated?

SavvyInNYC · 2020-08-14T00:43:18+00:00

People (men) don’t like when you hold a mirror up to them and force them to see themselves clearly.

Having women write out, in black and white, that we see and recognize the shitty things they do, that they aren’t sneaky, they aren’t getting away with it.. well, they don’t like that.

And rather than looking inwards and recognizing themselves in our words, they’d rather shift their self hatred and blame elsewhere. Therefore it’s this sub that is wrong and deserving of hate. Not them.

AyemHerself · 2020-08-14T01:41:04+00:00

Because Reddit is full of the LVM you've been working to avoid. Abusers and manipulators don't like it when their marks catch on to their tactics.

Icchy24 · 2020-08-14T01:32:49+00:00

It's unfortunate other women hate us too, for not being "inclusive" enough

dior-not-war · 2020-08-14T00:34:24+00:00

They don’t want women to know that they actually can do better and don’t have to put up with their bullshit. As long as there are women out there who they can convince to sleep with them in exchange for a few texts and dinner at Applebee’s, they won’t have to put in any real effort. If all women were like us, they wouldn’t be getting laid. We know our value, and they hate us for it.

Bovvsette · 2020-08-14T04:07:44+00:00

What you typed out, that is exactly the reasons they hate us. They can't stand women receiving power, positivity and us wanting and getting nice things. Women evading abuse and not being impressed by minimal effort is their worst nightmare. They hate us so much that they even hate other men for not hating us. Not to mention that we're not infested by men, so we're not blindly circlejerking, licking their boots or calling them kings for not doing anything. Gaslighting, negging or mansplaining have no place in here.

randomgirlimok · 2020-08-14T00:42:37+00:00

Because every guy who uses Reddit is LVM. Reddit is a porn site first and foremost!

2020-08-14T03:29:22+00:00

Becuz mens PUA BS wont Work on us to get free sex and maid duty.

tauruspiscescancer · 2020-08-14T05:11:59+00:00

Because people become very afraid when women have a voice and actually use it. When we refuse to succumb to the mediocrity, the low effort and low value, the abuse, etc., we are seen as “rebellious”. It’s unfortunate but to make things worse is that other women hate us too.

LadyGrimes · 2020-08-14T00:30:04+00:00

Because we refuse to put up with LVM crap

2020-08-14T01:35:32+00:00

Anything that inhibits a man’s access to sex- that unpacks all the the clown shit from A-Z is a direct challenge to a man’s power and authority that needs victims to coerce and control.

Without tributes the whole manly world collapses. So of course they are furious because FDS presages Masculine Man ™️Armageddon.

to_learn_to_fly · 2020-08-14T07:28:59+00:00

Because a typical FDS regular is the actual dream girl. And men go bats*t crazy when they realise they can't have one if they stick to their LVM ways. What are some values FDS preaches? Be educated, pursue your career, make your own money, cherish your friendships and other social relationships, have your hobbies you're passionate about, take care of your health, put effort in self-care (which usually leads to great looks)... What is not to like? Well, any insecure man knows that it's harder to get and keep a woman who has her own successful life and can easily move on any time if she's dissatisfied with a guy. HVM love the challenge; LVM are afraid of it.

And the women who side with men hating on this sub? Either it's internalised mysogyny or, now I'm talking from my own pickme experience, it's denial. When I was in a really bad LVM/NVM relationship, but didn't feel strong enough to leave yet, any FDS-like content triggered me hard. Because deep down I knew it was right, but I wasn't ready to accept it on a conscious level. Humans naturally prefer the comfortable to the unknown, hence defense mechanisms like denial in order to not have to go through major changes like breaking off a relationship even if it's bad.

bunnyday_ · 2020-08-14T01:53:15+00:00

This guy short circuited when I was just saying back EXACTLY what he was saying. I played dumb a comment or so later that didn’t fit in the screenshot and he ended up just not replying. Yet we are the bad guys 😂

when a man says taking money is the same as rape it’s fine, when I say it back it is somehow why this sub will get banned?

iheartcookin · 2020-08-14T03:00:56+00:00

I found this sub because someone was bashing it and calling it toxic. It may be a bit of a circle-jerk sometimes but those are my favorite subs.

As a parallel theres a vegan sub where we are constant having to be “tolerant” of meat-eaters, something we are profoundly against, let’s we be called preachy or intolerant. If we so much as point out hypocrisy, we get told “tHiS iS wHy I’m nOt VeGaN waaaaaaa!”

So many of us head over to vegancirclejerk where we don’t have to pretend it’s ok to eat cheese, just to spare some stranger’s feelings. I’m sure it’s considered toxic just like this sub is. But it’s just a safe space for people who are certain about their beliefs.

Likewise this is a place where we don’t have to pretend men aren’t mostly trash or sugarcoat any of it. We don’t need to be “tolerant” here, let’s save that for the rest of society where we have to sometimes get along with garbage people and refrain from pointing out that they’re garbage.

BabyGothQ · 2020-08-14T04:41:09+00:00

Hahahaha

I wish I was that.. unaffected.

It’s because we’re women. On the internet.

That’s enough right there.

But on top of that, we’re women, on the internet and only women are allowed. Boys only clubs don’t like it when girls make their own.

And then on top of that, we’re helping women reclaim their strength, confidence, standards, boundaries, which means that men are triggered because they don’t want to be better people - they want women to fix them up and take their crap and abuse for free.

tastyserenity · 2020-08-14T03:36:14+00:00

This sub is one of the best things I’ve discovered online. Can’t wait to share with my daughter in a few years.

SunflowerinVirgo0903 · 2020-08-14T05:03:38+00:00

[deleted]

xYennefer · 2020-08-14T07:07:24+00:00

Because a woman who is assertive, intelligent, non-delusional, and not gullible, will always be viewed as a crazy angry stupid psycho bitch by men.

Cytrinex · 2020-08-14T08:23:38+00:00

Reddit is the cesspool where LVM like to hang out unchallenged and wallowing in their own filth.

Sekina7 · 2020-08-14T07:34:48+00:00

Men know we have the power and have relied on their playground bully tactics to pull the wool over women eyes for centuries-I posted a thread from PPD a few days ago that sums it up brutally. Our space reveals the sad and at times depressing but not hopeless truth and as such renders most men powerless in any attempts to manipulate or devalue women. SO despite them desperately clutching at straws by trying to black ball us the real kicker is they will STILL want and pursue us and meet our standards because WE have what they want an are willing to walk away and enjoy fulfilling lives solo. Men dating with integrity and women with high self esteem should not have a problem. I recommended this sub to a woman who posted on AITA who showed true class in dumping her negging jealous boyfriend with minim of fuss and she liked the sub! Those of us who get it, get it.

BeADecentHumanBeing · 2020-08-14T07:35:49+00:00

Because FDS speaks the truth about men and patriarchy. And many want women to not be any wiser to the games and manipulation a lot of predators and scrotes play. They want discount women who are subservient, do all the work, and think abuse is normal/love.

passionatevirtuoso · 2020-08-14T04:48:12+00:00

The other comments cover the main reason pretty well.

Many men see us rejecting/attacking LV/NV men and perceive it as attacking ALL men, which is not true.

Here are some more reasons (not saying I agree with all of them them, btw):

Posts calling victims of bad/abusive relationships 'Pickmes' (this I do hate though)

Any feminist comments... Anything feminist tends to get hate from Reddit

And also posts bashing ideologies unrelated to FDS, e.g. bashing aspects of feminism, unrelated to men/dating, just for the sake of again blaming women for men's actions (just flair it as a vent post, I guess?) So even if you are a feminist, this would turn you off of FDS quickly, too

Posts blaming other women for men being NV/LV/abusers, like really!?

Incel-like terminology, which many, many FDSers dislike, and given the number of people who have died at the hands of incels, is gross

.....

In all, we SHOULD be angry at being treated badly and at a society and culture that privileges men's needs over women's, which has directly resulted in the mess we have today that FDS tries to fix.

But we should not be spreading hate. Be angry and rise together, I say.

So I get why people would think badly of this sub. I think that too occasionally, OP.

But I would DEFINITELY want this sub around for a good long time because it provides the guidance I sorely need to navigate this current, messed up world.

And lots of great commenters, so much love and support here too.

I get banned from other subs just because I post here. Am I going to tell myself they are all just brainwashed and I am the only one who knows FDS is great? Nah. There are some small toxic posters here. But this has been the ONLY place, the ONLY place that has helped me understand better how to have healthy boundaries, how to be less codependent, and it has also helped me feel less crazy. The ONLY place.

It is certainly not at all comparable to the various hate groups it is often mentioned alongside!

DinkyDoo531 · 2020-08-14T10:05:17+00:00

Why are we so hated?

Because reddit is filled with bots, trolls and incels. Good people are in the minority.

2020-08-14T10:35:36+00:00

Because we can’t be manipulated 🙃

Rdrses · 2020-08-14T06:26:25+00:00

You answered your own question. Scrotes hate that

fdsonlynoscrubs · 2020-08-14T11:18:48+00:00

There is some kind of weird victim fantasy the men of reddit seem to love to play instead of owning up to their own shortcomings. On the Bumble sub, anytime anyone posts anything, the most upvoted response is “you get matches?” Like ok dude, if you’re not getting matches, look in the mirror.

RedditRabbitt · 2020-08-14T11:51:24+00:00

Men have had it easy for decades and now we are making them work for it again like it’s 1950! Opening doors, paying for dates, picking up a woman and dropping her off, no sex on the first few dates. Being financially stable and able to support a family.. It takes effort!

Hahane · 2020-08-14T10:15:31+00:00

Because there're many abusers out there.

applestorm · 2020-08-14T10:57:47+00:00

It's a good thing though. I learned about FDS through an anti post. No publicity is bad publicity.

IWillNeverSubmit69 · 2020-08-14T12:22:33+00:00

Scrotes lack empathy so anything that challenges them instantly makes them rage.

jeanneeebeanneee · 2020-08-14T13:11:45+00:00

Low value people hate being held to the same standards that they feel entitled to hold others to. It makes them feel attacked.

LunaValley · 2020-08-14T17:19:01+00:00

[deleted]

marsupialface · 2020-08-14T18:01:09+00:00

Honestly not sure. There’s dating books out there saying the exact same thing and I’ve not seen any Redditors calling for them to be expunged in mass book burnings 🤔

From my point of view, this sub has been so useful in reminding me of my own self worth. If I date another abusive man, or liar and cheat, I will actually break lol. Being here amongst supportive women who’ve had similar experiences and working together to all avoid negative or low value humans seems like a net positive to me.

SkeletonMagi · 2020-08-14T14:33:56+00:00

They want what they can’t have, and they can’t have us. All they can do is rage.

painmakesyoustronger · 2020-08-14T14:47:50+00:00

Feminism has always been counter culture.

Do not confuse it with woke / liberal feminism, which is accepted because it is the controlled opposition of the patriarchy.

degnan1214 · 2020-08-14T17:34:14+00:00

This sub is so hated in part because it appeals to EVERY woman, if she's honest with herself. It's sharing a universal truth.

Healthy, well-balanced men understand this and don't have a problem with the basic tenets of this sub. Low-quality men who view women as sex vending machines and maids don't like this. This sub appeals to women of many political and religious backgrounds, (or no religious background), from all races, from all over the world. It cuts across racial, religious, political, and international lines.

That is particularly scary to scrotes. They can't target one "type" of women (religious, atheist, conservative, liberal) and believe to be completely "free" of us, because we are everywhere. We are human beings with souls and it doesn't matter what race we are or where we grew up, we eventually realize that we deserve better than just to be abused bangmaids.

DuckToaster12 · 2020-08-15T00:50:46+00:00

I'm as baffled as you are. I went to check out the sub because I heard of the bad rep but here its just a supportive sub for women and pointing out the bs we go through. It's a safe community space and what's wrong with that? :O

Bex_The_Hex · 2020-08-14T09:11:55+00:00

I've only been frequenting this sub for a week or two. It's easily one of my favorite subs. There is such a female positive message here, and I love the support we give each other.

I have read things that make me uncomfortable, though. It borderlines on sexism or bullying. The underlying message is correct and I agree with it, but when we shit talk and devalue men - no matter their value - we actually dehumanize them. I worry that this sort of behavior could become the female version of what women hate about how men treat us. It's not right, no matter who is doing it.

We want to be seen as human and treated with respect and as though we hold value. Then we have to recognize that the shit-talking and dehumanizing way we view men lowers our value. Not because we're "pickmeshas", but because good people don't shit talk others.

2020-08-14T07:27:41+00:00

LVM want us weak and easily manipulated. Knowledge is threatening to them. And any women who hate this group I feel sad for 💔

Title	Why are we so hated?
Author	LunaValley
Upvotes	337
Comments	75
Date	August 13, 2020 11:14 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/i9am07/why_are_we_so_hated/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/why-are-we-so-hated.66667 https://theredarchive.com/post/66667

Comments