Blue pill advice for romantically unsuccessful people seems generally to be 'love yourself first and then someone will come along'.

At the same time guys are often encouraged to do self improvement: get a haircut, improve hygiene, go to the gym, get new clothes, try new hobbies.

However these seem incompatible. If you love yourself as you are, you don't see the need to make alterations. Loving yourself truly means not saying things to yourself you wouldn't say to a loved one. If you had a wife you loved you wouldn't have the heart to say 'losing 20lbs will make you more attractive'.

Another example might be: if someone makes a joke about you, you're often advised to take it with good humour else you come across as bitter. But again, I would be expected to call someone out if they joked about something offensive to someone I love. So if I don't stand up for myself, I don't truly love myself.

In this way, true self love would seem to blind you from making positive changes in your life. Self love and self improvement therefore must be mutually exclusive