Gender roles

NockerJoe · 2020-01-13T22:47:44+00:00

One minor comment that was on r/askmen that stuck with me was a guy who said he and his woman were in theory equal partners, but this was essentially a polite fiction. The moment shit hits the fan it essentially falls on him to fix it almost entirely. A woman replied she never thought about it but her relationship was the same way by default. He wasn't being super angry and seemed super stressed about it, that was just how it was.

The idea of a gender role free society is, essentially, a polite fiction on a macro scale as well.

mechanical_elves · 2020-01-13T22:43:22+00:00

I don't think women want out of the gender role as much as they want the option to be in or out at different times, and selectively choose parts to play and parts to discard, and the option to change their minds when convenient.

I fully agree that they want men to stay firmly in their roles as protectors and/or providers, leading relationships, and so on.

StopTheIncels · 2020-01-14T01:01:15+00:00

Where's that damn hilarious youtube quote I saw:

"Women want the power of a man, the privilege of a lady, and the responsibility of neither"

Some shit like that.

acron5n5 · 2020-01-13T22:46:57+00:00

Do you agree?

Yes.

Is this fair?

No. But it's gonna remain how it is.

If so why or why not?

Because double standards.

Joey_Lopez · 2020-01-13T22:27:41+00:00

No. Women only want out of the inconvenient parts of their gender role. They still expect the benefits of being a woman.

poppy_blu · 2020-01-13T22:32:35+00:00

im a man, maintain a 4 bed 2 bath house alone and keep it very clean, work 6 days a week some days 16 hours. I meal prep, cook 2x a day, do laundry, clean, and still have time to socialize at the bar and visit family 30 miles away. Women have the easiest jobs in the world. Only difficult when you have young children and pets. I dont get wtf is so hard about this stuff lol. If all i had to do was run a vacuum once a week and scrub a toilet once or twice a week, put out and cook holy shit would life be easy.

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2020-01-13T23:40:45+00:00

The only thing making men stay in theirs is the desire to continue having heterosexual sex with women

The actual real feminists if the 70s eschewed their sex role to the point of dropping both male and FSM beauty standards and became either political lesbians or celibate. Every man in the world can lay down the burden of their gender role tomorrow, they can't do it and remain sexually viable any more than the feminists of the 70s could

diffdedbed · 2020-01-13T23:48:32+00:00

it has become apparent that most women want out of their gender role

Once they get pregnant suddenly many are apple pie and lets have another baby.

Speaker7 · 2020-01-14T02:22:40+00:00

When asking a feminist whether she thinks women should be drafted, she will avoid sidestep the question by saying no one should be drafted. But that's a cop out. Of course no one should be drafted. Of course there should be no war. But it is and there are. So please answer the question directly. Yes I'm a feminist but im the only one I know with my opinion. Yes we should be drafted, just not in physical combat. We can't fight men and win. But we can push a key on a keyboard for missiles. A womans life isn't more valuable then a man's. So we should also share the risk of dying. Let's not forget a woman won a silver star in combat. With a ranged weapon. We can contribute by fighting from a distance. I don't want to die. But I don't disearve special treatment just because I can pop out babies. Remember, a woman cannot get pregnant without a man's help. So ..

Whisper · 2020-01-14T07:27:31+00:00

it has become apparent that most women want out of their gender role

Don't listen to what women say. Watch what they do.

MuleFool42 · 2020-01-13T23:12:15+00:00

Totally agree. Women, primarily, are still attracted to the gender roles for men that have been with us for centuries.

So much of what men do is based on what women choose, and today, very few women choose anything other than the very rigid, traditional, male gender role. They are supportive of other women choosing a more, say, passive and emotional guy, but their mate choices usually resemble the strong types that they can depend on to protect and provide.

Men are pretty stuck in that role unless they don't care about having a partner.

alluringjustice · 2020-01-14T00:29:02+00:00

Men and women both want out of their gender roles while the other gender sticks to them. How many men have you seen on here that drool over the thought of having a submissive homemaker virgin wife to pop out 10 kids and stay thin and feminine and virtuous? The only difference is that women care less about what men think of them. No one is holding a gun to men’s heads forcing them to stick to their gender roles, they can be as feminine as they want to be and society will even celebrate that. But they know that most women don’t want that and men measure their value by how many women they can get. Men are, once again, trapped by their thirst

Orange_Paisley · 2020-01-13T22:49:19+00:00

I'm not a gender, I'm a person. I just want to live my life, work my job, take care of my family, engage in hobbies, spend time with friends, etc. What is this gender role you speak of, and why should I adhere to it?

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DubsPackage · 2020-01-14T15:25:59+00:00

Women (politically as a group) believe in "roles" when it's to their benefits, and believe in "equality" when it's to their benefits.

Men (non-politically as a non-group) are the same too.

In relationships the main thing is communication, you can't just "assume" so you have to be able to talk and say "I'll do this if you do that." And you each find your own role and your niche in the household. If you can't agree on that, then the relationship doesn't work.

Twiteena · 2020-01-15T01:46:30+00:00

I was raised with trad con gender roles and a very 1950s dynamic at home, plus my church was super conservative and we gals were informed of our inferiority. It was a given that the husband leads and bosses around the wife, and she submits. Women were also not supposed to take on leaderships positions over men, that was seen as unnatural and against God. We were brought up to see ourselves as complements to men, but "man is the glory of God and woman is the glory of man" so we are just there to help.

No it's not fair and I rebelled against all this in my 20s. It made me so mad that I was seen as inferior and so I got a career and supported myself and refused to get married. I lived the feminist dream and began to question my conservative upbringing. Began to associate with liberals and leftists who did not see me as less than a man. There is a lot more to this story, but I will wrap it up.

Now I am at a point in life where I can see the mistakes in both sides, and the pitfalls of the egalitarians are one thing but the pitfalls of the trad cons was another. Someday I should make a post about this, but it boils down to what you want out of life. And no, none of it is fair.

poppy_blu · 2020-01-14T00:36:50+00:00

I disagree. My social sphere is highly educated high earning people. Women do not want men in traditional roles. They want an equal earner who pulls their weight at home and with the kids. They want an equal partner they can make decision with, not a “head of the family” they defer to.

I don’t doubt there are women who want traditional men. I’m not one of them and neither are the women i associate with. Meaning you can absolutely find women who don’t want a 1950s father knows best fantasy.

Can’t believe its 2020 and we’re still having this conversation. I wonder if men who say this just want a traditional woman themselves but just aren’t attractive to those women.

shalomanioleh2 · 2020-01-14T00:50:12+00:00

Yes I've noticed. Women want to be equal but they dont want to be drafted. I think it's the price of equality. I am female.

C0mpL1c1t · 2020-01-14T03:41:21+00:00

Can you tell me what you mean by “gender role” for each gender?

2020-01-14T03:59:08+00:00

You make it sound as if war is something we can decide against. War sucks. Drafts suck. All of it sucks.

Real-Area · 2020-01-14T04:46:40+00:00

As a woman who is bi-sexual, I already don't fall into the heterosexual normality of my gender role that is pressured to pursue and be pursued by just men. This wasn't acceptable in some towns I lived in where certain gender roles are romanticized, by certain groups of the society. As a whole, I don't think gender roles can be neutralized into characterized traits anymore when we are in an age that is now more accepting of gender-fluent, trans-people, non-binary people. But maybe that's because I am part of the queer community and that definitely changes my outlook. That is my personal experience.

If I look at gender roles as a whole I think society and culture shape it more than anything, and it has less to do with what individual women or men want versus what is accepted and what is expected through normalization.

Illustrious_Drive · 2020-01-14T00:10:12+00:00

Unfortunately, men are primarily ego driven in a way that women are not.

Men hate being weak, not being protectors, and being useless. They’ll never fully abandon their gender role.

Dora_Bowl · 2020-01-13T23:10:25+00:00

I think people want out of these in general, even if they do not really explicitly say it. Gender roles have declined drastically in the last couple of hundreds years and I am inductively optimistic it will continue.

ChewedandDigested · 2020-01-14T16:17:50+00:00

I think you see what you want to see when you go web diving. I think most of the men here agreeing with you don’t take the time to understand feminist thought or communities or they would see that the abolishment of gender roles in general is a huge component of feminism since they’re all rooted in and contributing to the continuation of the patriarchal structure of our society. The idea is a do away with the underlying attitudes and beliefs that say men must be the strong provider and women must be the weak care taker. Since both gender roles come from the same source, treating the cause can eliminate both. Feminists of course do this from a female perspective, necessarily treating the female gender role symptoms at the same time. Unfortunately one rarely sees men’s groups attacking it from their own angle.

GreenSatyr · 2020-01-14T19:52:33+00:00

Gender roles are definity on the decline. I think it's good.

Obviously men would be more likepy to want to continue their gender role, same way brahmins would be more likely to want the caste system and white people would be more likely to want slavery.

Title	Gender roles
Author	cynical_humanbeing
Upvotes	20
Comments	250
Date	January 13, 2020 10:22 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/eobhit/gender_roles/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/gender-roles.310913 https://theredarchive.com/post/310913

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