N COUNTS WEEKLY DISCUSSION THREAD

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[–]DelusionIncarnateXDTwo Handed Great Sword Wielding Cum Brained MALE 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (1 child) | Copy Link

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[–]Colt_MasterPurple Pill Man 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]Cultural-Ad-8486Slavic Purple Pill Man 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (3 children) | Copy Link

The problem is that unfounded self-doubt cannot be proven by you if you do not know what is literally going on in the other person's head.

And even if it turns out that someone is really unsure of themselves in something, then... Then it makes even more sense for that person to avoid what makes them feel uncomfortable. And this is especially true for relationships, because you literally should not be in an LTR with someone who makes you feel bad.

Well, regarding anxiety and anxiety disorder, I will simply copy what I wrote to another person, because it is essentially the same thing:

"The self-doubt I'm talking about is real, non-parodic and caused by the influence of the external environment/lack of external positive confirmation."

"And what people with a slutty past talk about here is most often an unfounded self-doubt. An example of which is how a guy groundlessly asks his wife for a DNA test for a child, and this despite the fact that she has never done anything that should have aroused suspicion."

"And the problem with many people here is that they mix up correct (reasonable) self-doubt with toxic unfounded self-doubt."

[–]Colt_MasterPurple Pill Man 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago* (2 children) | Copy Link

The problem is that unfounded self-doubt cannot be proven by you if you do not know what is literally going on in the other person's head.

It can though? self doubt as to whether you aced the exam question where you were asked whether 1+1 equals 2 can be rapidly dismissed, and if it can't then it's a sign of deeper troubles in that person which are valid to call out.

And even if it turns out that someone is really unsure of themselves in something, then... Then it makes even more sense for that person to avoid what makes them feel uncomfortable. And this is especially true for relationships, because you literally should not be in an LTR with someone who makes you feel bad.

I repeat my last comment, it's not good to let unfounded fears dictate your decision making, you should make decisions with correctly calculated risks, unfounded self-doubt should be worked on in order to reach a better state of mind and make good decisions that are good for you. Avoiding the source of discomfort if done should ideally be a temporary measure until it's worked on.

"The self-doubt I'm talking about is real, non-parodic and caused by the influence of the external environment/lack of external positive confirmation."

"And what people with a slutty past talk about here is most often an unfounded self-doubt. An example of which is how a guy groundlessly asks his wife for a DNA test for a child, and this despite the fact that she has never done anything that should have aroused suspicion."

"And the problem with many people here is that they mix up correct (reasonable) self-doubt with toxic unfounded self-doubt."

I don't know how to respond to this, I brought the fact about anxiety disorders because it's a counterpoint to the claim "Being insecure is fine and completely correct if the situation you find yourself in literally makes you feel that way" and its rationale, as for some people their anxiety is not really a force of good and instead something that worsens their quality of life. None of this goes against it. If anything, if you're now arguing that insecurity is fine only when the source of the insecurity is a legitimate concern, then you're contradicting your previous statement.

[–]Cultural-Ad-8486Slavic Purple Pill Man 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (1 child) | Copy Link

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[–]Super-Ad-8731escortmaxxing | succubuspilled 5 points6 points7 points 1 year ago* (7 children) | Copy Link

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[–]Super-Ad-8731escortmaxxing | succubuspilled 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (1 child) | Copy Link

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[–]attendquoiwoman....pills are dumb 4 points5 points6 points 1 year ago (3 children) | Copy Link

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[–]ThatBitchAPromiscuous Woman -2 points-1 points0 points 1 year ago (12 children) | Copy Link

[–]Intelligent-InsightBlue Pill Man 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Cultural-Ad-8486Slavic Purple Pill Man 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]jay303xwine moms banished from PPD: 1 | man 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Lift_and_LurkMan: all pills are dumb 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]attendquoiwoman....pills are dumb 3 points4 points5 points 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]half_avocado33No Pill Woman 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]autistic_cool_kidMan 38 | Buddhistpilled & Autismaxxed 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Velor22Purple Pill Man 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]MongoBobalossus 4 points5 points6 points 1 year ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]Intelligent-InsightBlue Pill Man 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (2 children) | Copy Link

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[–]Lift_and_LurkMan: all pills are dumb 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]S0yslut♀Married Purple Pill Humanist -1 points0 points1 point 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]ThatBitchAPromiscuous Woman 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]PSXSnack09No Pill Man 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]ThatBitchAPromiscuous Woman 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (2 children) | Copy Link

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[–]Lift_and_LurkMan: all pills are dumb -1 points0 points1 point 1 year ago (8 children) | Copy Link

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[–]autistic_cool_kidMan 38 | Buddhistpilled & Autismaxxed 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Lift_and_LurkMan: all pills are dumb -1 points0 points1 point 1 year ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

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[–]ThatBitchAPromiscuous Woman -1 points0 points1 point 1 year ago (6 children) | Copy Link

[–]Cultural-Ad-8486Slavic Purple Pill Man 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (5 children) | Copy Link

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[–]Cultural-Ad-8486Slavic Purple Pill Man 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (1 child) | Copy Link

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[–]Lift_and_LurkMan: all pills are dumb 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (8 children) | Copy Link

[–]Cultural-Ad-8486Slavic Purple Pill Man 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (7 children) | Copy Link

[–]Lift_and_LurkMan: all pills are dumb 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (6 children) | Copy Link

[–]Cultural-Ad-8486Slavic Purple Pill Man 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (5 children) | Copy Link

Well, I disagree. Probably because believing in fairy tales is a bit abnormal to such a strong degree

Self-confidence still grows from positive life experiences.

If a man gets romantic and sexual confirmation, then oh surprise... He will be self-confident, because girls literally cling to him.

But if a man gets nothing but negativity and rejection from women, then... He will also surprisingly not have much faith in himself. And let's be real, he would be a fool if he believed that he would succeed.

Then you can think that nothing will work out for you, but at the same time if something does work out, it will be a happy moment.

And the same LeBron James... I doubt that his life experience is shit. Considering that he has achieved so much, he was not only mentally but also genetically (like all professional athletes) unique.

With all due respect, he had no chance to lose and therefore his self-confidence is justified and literally confirms my words

[–]Lift_and_LurkMan: all pills are dumb 6 points7 points8 points 1 year ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]Cultural-Ad-8486Slavic Purple Pill Man -1 points0 points1 point 1 year ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]Lift_and_LurkMan: all pills are dumb 4 points5 points6 points 1 year ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]Cultural-Ad-84861 point 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

He had no “successful experience” yet but he was supremely confident that he COULD make that shot. Because of all his practice. Because of all the work he put in. Because of all his time and effort that he put in. THATS what built his confidence up to get him to the point of Creating successful experiences.

And now, I don't know if you're a troll.

I'll repeat myself. HE HAD A POSITIVE EXPERIENCE IN PRACTICE AND ONLY THAT'S WHY HE HAD CONFIDENCE IN HIMSELF.

And gods, the fact that you literally give an example of a unique person makes your argument only shittier, because I can just ask you... How many people were just as keen on basketball? Participated in various competitions, trained since childhood. Answer: many THOUSANDS and more.

But they all failed, despite their efforts. And they also did not get the same positive experience as the person you gave as an example.

[–]Lift_and_Lurk1 point 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Practice isn’t a game. You get that right?

And lots of people fail. And they learn from failure. And some might not have made it to the NBA but 118 division 1A schools have 15 players totaling 1789 players on their rosters despite only 64 guys allowed to be drafted into the pros every year.

Do the ones that got to be able to play big time college ball consider that “failing?”

What about the ones that just managed to make a team and be part of something even if they were a bench warmer in HS? That a failure, even tho they got to be a part of a team and everything that went with that?

How about the ones that never even got to that level but just played for the love of the game and got better for the rec league? They enjoyed time even if they lost a meaningless pickup game?

They fail?

Or did all of them get to a level way WAY higher than the dude who sat in the teacher’s and never tried, because all he thought about was “all or nothing!”

And I used LeBron because he failed the first time he made it to the finals. In fact he’s lost 6 championship series compared to the 4 he won.

That’s a losing record in the finals. You think he thought of himself as a failure after those 6 series losses?

Or did he use each one to motivate himself to get better?

[–]PB-French-Toast-9641 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]Cultural-Ad-8486Slavic Purple Pill Man -1 points0 points1 point 1 year ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]PB-French-Toast-9641 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]Cultural-Ad-8486Slavic Purple Pill Man -1 points0 points1 point 1 year ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]PB-French-Toast-9641 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]jay303xwine moms banished from PPD: 1 | man 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago* (14 children) | Copy Link

[–]Bitch_King-of_Angmarbased and fatphobia-pilled 💊 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

i think you should apply this logic to other aspects of life as well. once an addict, always an addict, can't teach an old dog new tricks, and "people are defined by the worst thing they've ever done."

and that the sum total accumulation of life experiences dont make anyone better off. the more things they do, the more boundaries they push, the more corrupted and irredeemable they inevitably become.

i have a feeling you wouldnt want to go there though. think long and hard about the things you've done that call your character into question. you will always be that person. you cant undo any of it.

this goes for everyone who reads this btw. no one can overcome their greatest shames in life.

i am also not trolling, i truly believe this. i just think there are a lot of worse things people do (that determine exactly how bad of a person i think they are) that define them than be a slut. so i mostly focus on those types of actions.

[–]Excellent_Badger123Purple Pill Woman -1 points0 points1 point 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

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[–]Schleudergang1400Average Chad, Age Gap, Harem, Machiavellian Red Pill Man 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]jay303xwine moms banished from PPD: 1 | man 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (1 child) | Copy Link

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[–]MongoBobalossus 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Embarrassed-Gap-3373 [score hidden] 1 year ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Every time I’ve dated someone with a casual or promiscuous sexual past, I ended up getting cheated on. So I’ve decided to stop pursuing serious relationships with women who have that kind of history.

I know this’ll probably get me labeled insecure, bitter, or worse but from my perspective, it’s just a pattern I’ve noticed and a boundary I’ve chosen to set.

I get that people can change, and the past doesn’t always predict the future, but when it comes to emotional risk, I feel like I'm just choosing not to play with fire anymore. It’s like everyone around me is trying to hand me a snake and saying, “Go on, pet it. It probably won’t bite.” And when I hesitate, it’s, “What’s wrong? You scared of snakes? Insecure much?”

I don’t hate anyone. I’m not angry. I just know what I’ve personally experienced, and I’m adjusting accordingly. People make decisions about compatibility based on all sorts of criteria. Lifestyle, religion, ambition, physical attraction so why is it suddenly taboo if someone's criteria is informed by patterns that have been experienced in the past?

Is that really insecurity or is it just learning?

[–]ThatBitchAPromiscuous Woman -3 points-2 points-1 points 1 year ago (5 children) | Copy Link

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[–]Embarrassed-Gap-3373 [score hidden] 1 year ago* (3 children) | Copy Link

"Consequences"? You mean like STDs? Unwanted pregnancies? Abortions? Or how about the fallout when a guy finds out his girlfriend lied about her past and bounces?

I was dating this girl once, and she invited me to a party with her friends. Seemed chill until I realized half the dudes there had hooked up with her. There were maybe 12 people total, most of them guys, and the few girls there? Yeah, she’d slept with their boyfriends, so they hated her too. I noped the fuck out real quick. I don't even know why I told you that you'll probably say it's fan fiction.

Are those the consequences you're talking about? Because what even are you saying? Having a kid is a consequence.

EDIT: BTW that woman that I dated afterwards got ostracized and ended up becoming a crazy heroin addict who beat up an old woman. If you don't want to believe me. You don't have to. But I can prove it. It's in florida. It's all public.

[–]ThatBitchAPromiscuous Woman 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (2 children) | Copy Link

You mean like STDs?

Consequence of unprotected sex. Wrap up. And regularly testing if you're promiscuous.

Unwanted pregnancies? Abortions?

Risk of having sex for heterosexual pairing. Not necessarily a consequence for being promiscuous.

Or how about the fallout when a guy finds out his girlfriend lied about her past and bounces?

Doesn't sound like fallout. Sounds like the trash took itself out. And now the exes can find someone more compatible.

I don't even know why I told you that you'll probably say it's fan fiction.

I don't know why, either. Doesn't tell me anything about promiscuity.

Having a kid is a consequence.

So do you consider yourself a consequence? I certainly don't consider myself a consequence.

If you don't want to believe me.

I still don't know what Florida Woman says about promiscuity.

[–]Embarrassed-Gap-3373 [score hidden] 1 year ago (1 child) | Copy Link

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[–]S0yslut♀Married Purple Pill Humanist 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

No, that isn’t how it was in the US. Most men and women were sex positive it is this new generation that are trending conservative and view casual sex as wrong. You are literally saying this crap to a bunch of 30 year olds from western countries where none of this is a major consequence. Also men reward promiscuity, the three date rule for example is men rewarding promiscuity with their resources and attention. The most promiscuous and average women I knew (some even obese) married or were with their future husbands by 22-24. So I don’t see where promiscuous women suffered any consequences you guys imagine and those women had body counts dam near 100 and were not hot, they were average-fat. And yes their husbands do know about their pasts because it was a small town and everyone knew.

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My point is that it's a rejection that doesn't look like one.

And if you are the person others are curving, they won't tell you.

It's easier for you to see with a different example:

I reconnected with a childhood friend a few months ago. Over the course of a couple weeks I realized she was a drama queen, and a relatively toxic person. I didn't want to make more drama of it. I just let the conversation die. She never learned it died because of her drama.

But its not me. Any reasonable person will eventually move on from her. So her life will be full of those either desperate enough or toxic enough for staying around her to be worth it.

Being promiscuous works in a similar fashion. You don't care about what you don't notice, but you do care about most men being unreliable and flaky. Most men that are willing to be noticed by someone promiscuous. But you won't hear that bit.

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[–]MongoBobalossus 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

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[–]PSXSnack09No Pill Man 5 points6 points7 points 1 year ago* (7 children) | Copy Link

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you can be catfished about weight too through dating apps, you can still idealize that person until you find out they re fat and your feelings towards them might or might not change even though the only difference is their weight but the same platitude of them being the same exact person you were attracted to still applies, the only difference is a few more pounds of fat who really doesnt makes them a worst person or a worst partner does it? they can still be quite loving and whatever positive traits for a relationship you can think of, but that doesnt means it doesnt matters or it isnt conventionally unattractive. a different story is that for you it doesnt matter, just like theres people who dont care about someone being fat, hell theres even people who have a fat fetish, the only difference is that hiding the fact you re fat is not as easy as hiding the fact you have a big partner count, or that you have cheated before, or that you have weird fetishes or that you re bisexual or that you have paid for escorting before etc

[–]ThatBitchAPromiscuous Woman 3 points4 points5 points 1 year ago* (4 children) | Copy Link

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[–]ThatBitchAPromiscuous Woman 3 points4 points5 points 1 year ago (21 children) | Copy Link

[–]TimosoxIndigo pilled man -1 points0 points1 point 1 year ago (8 children) | Copy Link

[–]ThatBitchAPromiscuous Woman 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (7 children) | Copy Link

[–]TimosoxIndigo pilled man 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (6 children) | Copy Link

[–]ThatBitchAPromiscuous Woman 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (5 children) | Copy Link

[–]TimosoxIndigo pilled man -2 points-1 points0 points 1 year ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]ta06012022Man[🍰] -1 points0 points1 point 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]ThatBitchAPromiscuous Woman 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]TimosoxIndigo pilled man 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]ThatBitchAPromiscuous Woman 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Emotional_Section_59 -1 points0 points1 point 1 year ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]ThatBitchAPromiscuous Woman 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (3 children) | Copy Link

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[–]Ultramega39Male/#MensMentalHealthMonth 9 points10 points11 points 1 year ago (6 children) | Copy Link

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[–]Ultramega39Male/#MensMentalHealthMonth 5 points6 points7 points 1 year ago (4 children) | Copy Link

So you think that my example is a strawman argument?

But you're implying that promiscuous women are dance happy alcoholics who can't read.

Not what I'm trying to say. People everywhere possess qualities that I would consider to be attractive and unattractive. But some unattractive qualities like being promiscuous or having a high sex drive are things that are automatic dealbreakers for me. Another person might not be promiscuous but they hate kids, again automatic dealbreaker. Someone doesn't have to be the complete opposite of me for me to not want to date them.

But I will say that I probably on average have less things in common with someone who is promiscuous than someone who isn't, I am a major unapologetic prude. Though i want to make it clear that just because they don't have much in common with me doesn't mean that i think that they’re dumb.

[–]nefnafautistic sex savant (Man) 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]ThatBitchAPromiscuous Woman -1 points0 points1 point 1 year ago (2 children) | Copy Link

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[–]washington_breadstixMan | 33 | American in Germany | 5'11" 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (4 children) | Copy Link

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[–]SpicyclothWhite Pill Man 5 points6 points7 points 1 year ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]washington_breadstixMan | 33 | American in Germany | 5'11" 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

I see your point. Ultimately I'm pretty neutral about the whole issue of n-count, so I'm not trying to pull a "gotcha" on either side. I agree that two people with such fundamentally different views on sex probably don't make a good match for each other.

The most glaring one is the large gap of sexual experience. I've had promiscuous guys tell me how annoying it is to sleep with a virgin or low n count woman

I'm not sure if I qualify as a "promiscuous guy", but I've had sex with both high-n and low-n women and I haven't really noticed a correlation between a person's n-count and what it's like to have sex with that specific person. People talk about this as though n-count is supposed to have some huge effect on the quality of sex itself, but I've never known that to be the case.

I can see how it would be frustrating to have a sexual relationship with someone who has a lot of hang-ups about sex, and those hang-ups may go hand-in-hand with a low n-count. But I would still put those hang-ups (or lack thereof) into the "differing views on sex" category and not necessarily characterize the problem as one that arises from the difference in n-count itself. In other words, I guess I see a difference in n-count as another potential "symptom" of something, but not the cause of anything.

[–]autistic_cool_kidMan 38 | Buddhistpilled & Autismaxxed -3 points-2 points-1 points 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

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[–]attendquoiwoman....pills are dumb 3 points4 points5 points 1 year ago (11 children) | Copy Link

[–]StupidWhiteBoiTee Hee 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (10 children) | Copy Link

[–]nefnafautistic sex savant (Man) 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]attendquoiwoman....pills are dumb 3 points4 points5 points 1 year ago (8 children) | Copy Link

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[–]attendquoiwoman....pills are dumb 3 points4 points5 points 1 year ago (6 children) | Copy Link

[–]StupidWhiteBoiTee Hee -2 points-1 points0 points 1 year ago (5 children) | Copy Link

[–]attendquoiwoman....pills are dumb 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (4 children) | Copy Link

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[–]PopeoathRed Pill Man 10 points11 points12 points 1 year ago (3 children) | Copy Link

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[–]autistic_cool_kidMan 38 | Buddhistpilled & Autismaxxed 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]fiftypoundpuppyCollecting Alpha Widow benefits ♀ 5 points6 points7 points 1 year ago (21 children) | Copy Link

[–]PSXSnack09No Pill Man 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]fiftypoundpuppyCollecting Alpha Widow benefits ♀ 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

much to your dissapointment theres loads of hypocrites around there,

What "hypocrisy?" I'm just remarking on an observed pattern, both IRL and online

I'd have to care in the first place in order to be "disappointed" 🙄

also i love it how you all try to imply that a guy holding himself to the same standard he wants in a partner is bad

I did no such thing

I'm just remarking on an observed pattern, both IRL and online

What I said actually aligns with a man "holding himself to the same standard" 🙄

like if somehow that preference is only valid if a dude sleeps around

Nothing I said was about "preferences" being "valid"

see this why im not surprised people prefered trump

Who knew I had the power to sway elections months after the fact?

"Logical, rational sex" my ass, it's hilarious how much in their feels men get on this post. You came in all hot and bothered spewing absolutely nonsense

[–]StupidWhiteBoiTee Hee 3 points4 points5 points 1 year ago (9 children) | Copy Link

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[–]StupidWhiteBoiTee Hee 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago* (7 children) | Copy Link

[–]Temporary-Flight-192Purple Pill Woman 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago* (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]PSXSnack09No Pill Man -1 points0 points1 point 1 year ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]Temporary-Flight-192Purple Pill Woman 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago* (1 child) | Copy Link

I was responding to the above person making those connections. I am well aware that there is no connection.

Do atheists marry less? I don’t know. That’s another assumption I actually find counterintuitive.

https://www.pewresearch.org/religion/2017/04/26/in-america-does-more-education-equal-less-religion/

Higher levels of education are associated with higher levels of atheism

“ Pew Research Center's (2015) Religious Landscape Survey reported 58% of atheists earned $50,000 or more annually, compared to 44% of Christians in the same survey”

Higher incomes have a positive correlation to likelihood of being an atheist.

https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2015/12/04/education-and-marriage/

Both higher income annd higher education are also correlated to a higher likelihood of being and staying married.

I’m not sure a line between atheists and lower marriage rates is clear tbh.

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[–]fiftypoundpuppyCollecting Alpha Widow benefits ♀ 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

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[–]PSXSnack09No Pill Man 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (3 children) | Copy Link

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[–]PSXSnack09No Pill Man 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (1 child) | Copy Link

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[–]Mauf066No Pill Man 4 points5 points6 points 1 year ago (3 children) | Copy Link

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[–]Mauf066No Pill Man 4 points5 points6 points 1 year ago (1 child) | Copy Link

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[–]ThatBitchAPromiscuous Woman 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (7 children) | Copy Link

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[–]ThatBitchAPromiscuous Woman 4 points5 points6 points 1 year ago (3 children) | Copy Link

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[–]Cultural-Ad-8486Slavic Purple Pill Man 4 points5 points6 points 1 year ago (1 child) | Copy Link

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[–]Cultural-Ad-8486Slavic Purple Pill Man 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]Lift_and_LurkMan: all pills are dumb 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]Cultural-Ad-8486Slavic Purple Pill Man 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (1 child) | Copy Link

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[–]MuscletovMaroon pill man 20 points21 points22 points 1 year ago* (7 children) | Copy Link

[–]ViolentShallotRed Pill Man 6 points7 points8 points 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[+]autistic_cool_kidMan 38 | Buddhistpilled & Autismaxxed -6 points-5 points-4 points 1 year ago (4 children) | Copy Link

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[–]autistic_cool_kidMan 38 | Buddhistpilled & Autismaxxed -1 points0 points1 point 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

If a guy has all of these things, it's likely because he has practiced it on many different women. So if a woman tries to filter men based on them, she'll likely end up with a fboy who will pump and dump her, because he just sees her as wet hole #253.

A man can have these things naturally, having practiced confidence differently or just having had a good upbringind
A man can have practiced those on women but still don't necessarily want to just fuck anyone
A man can have practiced those skills on women and want a lot of sex, doesn't mean he will disrespect them or dehumanize them, sex is not dehumanizing in the worldview of many people especially successful men (both a cause and a consequence of it)

Like, as I started respecting women more through my life, opportunities for sex arose, not the opposite - which makes complete sense, people feel when you disrespect them. Why would anyone want to sleep with you if they know on some level you will respect them less for it?

Anyway my point is, I don't think your vision reflects actual reality, sounds more like imagination from informations one would gather very indirectly

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[–]PSXSnack09No Pill Man 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago* (5 children) | Copy Link

it is, it demonstrates that all the arguments made against why caring about it is bad are completely hypocritical and in bad faith, they dont think is wrong to care about it, they just want to eat the whole cake withouth getting fat.

Is just so funny that you try to frame it as "straight people" when it is straight women the ones who take issue with bisexual men by a massive margin, while men are way more accepting of bisexuality, not only that but is also homophobic an sexist as heck, straight doesnt means "attracted to other straights", it means attracted to the opposite sex, therefore:

the only basis to reject a bisexual man on the fact he has been with other men is homophobia and sexism cuz "real men dont experiment with other men".

dont get me wrong, if a woman doesnt wants to date a bisexual guy cuz she finds it gross she is completely entitled to her choice, but to berate men for caring about a potential partners past and acting like not caring about it and criticizing those who do grants some sort of moral superiority in the dating world when it is all out of insecurity is laughable

i dont support hypocrites though

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Who says she’s against?! Since she doesn’t date gay men or lesbians is she somehow “against” them?!

That’s your flaw in your binary logic. It’s not “for of against” it’s “I want straight. I will go for what i want. Nothing wrong with anyone else, but straight wants straight” And straight will pirate and get straight

And insecure dudes are being called insecure because they ARE insecure. And they are acting insecure. And rather than owning and addressing and doing something about it, they want to come up with stupid “comparables” that don’t even make sense instead of putting in the work to build the confidence AND appeal to not be so insecure.

But they don’t. They just want to keep justifying their insecurity. Because they are afraid.

And scared and insecure ARE the real issues. And hiding from them isn’t winner mentality. It just isn’t.

And no matter how much they want to play the victim: it’s their own insecurities that are keeping dudes where they are at.

And that’s as obvious to everyone as “straight wanting straight”.

No amount of mental gymnastics can change it.

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You’re assuming they didn’t try before giving up. Try, see it’s pointless or not worth it, then give up.

It's not pointless to be attractive at least to me, I'd rather spend my life enjoying what I see in the mirror even if it didn't matter for dating - you have only one life, might as well spend it looking fabulous.

But also, who just gives up like this? Sounds like going to the gym, not managing to lift 200kg and giving up. It's a journey, a long process, but also enjoyable and satisfying.

I can't imagine just giving up becoming a more educated, happy, wise and attractive person through your life.

Nonsensical to bank on being “attractive” when you’re old and not when you’re in your prime age

Not sure what you consider "old", I think everybody have a different view of what "old" is. But at my almost-40s, I realise you don't need youth to be very attractive.

The only thing with age is that some people are attractive just because they're young, and those people will indeed not be so attractive as they age, which is why it's harder to find attractive older people. Doesn't mean you can't be super-attractive past your "prime". Actually, this might even be a good thing, if you take care of yourself when everybody else gave up, you're on top.

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A concern over N Count is pure insecurity. There is literally nothing to it except the fear that you won't measure up.

"Oh, but they view sex in a casual way and not an expression of true love." - Stop masterbating. That kind of pleasure is purely for your partner and not something that should be taken lightly, right? Or is it actually just a big rush of chemicals that feels awesome?

"They have an increased risk of STI's." - You should ask all of your partners for a test if they're not a virgin. After all, an STI can be passed on by anyone at all. In fact, the most rampant communities are the elderly.

"It won't feel special with me if she's fucked other guys." - You're worried you can't satisfy her, its not rocket science, we're not actually a different species from Venus... if you can't satisfy a woman then you're clearly lacking mentally, it's pretty simple, we all know where the clitoris is and you should be able to pick up on verbal/physical cues that you're doing something right.

Sex is a perfectly normal human experience, you can fuck whoever you want as long as everyone involved is enthusiastically consenting to it. If you're concerned about the number of partners your GF has had then don't date her, it's really simple. It's not her fault you're jealous of her past because you weren't able to do the same.

It's far more important if your partner has previously cheated than if they've had casual sex in between relationships.

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I can point out what I feel too. It's not insecurity its disgust.

Disgust of what? You're the one trying to convince me you're not insecure 🤣 if a woman becomes disgusting after she's had sex then you'd best be holding out for a virgin.

I'll answer your question because I love bullshit. I would date unless I heard it was a front to get fucked lol.

This answers nothing, you're just typing nonsensical shit 🤣 all dating has the end goal of a relationship, which in turn for the majority of people means fucking and pro creating, that's why we date...

Sure, because the opinion of what women think of me is what drives me in this world.

I mean, for the majority of people, the opinion of the person you're dating or want to date matters.

I can give the deadest dick and still feel I'm him.

You're who? 🤣 I think you may need to brush up on English. This is very difficult to understand.

It sounds like you're upset about being called insecure, which would mean you relate to the label, which is totally fine, but why do Men get so offended when we label their emotions? It's literally just giving you the knowledge to identify your own issues.

[–]RahLytPurple Pill Man [score hidden] 1 year ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Disgust of what? You're the one trying to convince me you're not insecure 🤣 if a woman becomes disgusting after she's had sex then you'd best be holding out for a virgin.

Disgust of self. Everybody cummed in and moved on and I'm stuck here? The disgust it's the realisation you must be the clown lol.

This answers nothing, you're just typing nonsensical shit 🤣 all dating has the end goal of a relationship, which in turn for the majority of people means fucking and pro creating, that's why we date...

Ok and I guess this is very funny.. not that you're triggered? Lol

I mean, for the majority of people, the opinion of the person you're dating or want to date matters.

Sure, it matters. but I would never question my self worth lol. If a woman who's still willingly open her legs for me, think I'm her worse lover, I sleep the exact same.

You're who? 🤣 I think you may need to brush up on English. This is very difficult to understand.

This is a perfect example. I speak 4 languages. I couldn't give a fuck of what you think of my English lol.

It sounds like you're upset about being called insecure, which would mean you relate to the label, which is totally fine, but why do Men get so offended when we label their emotions?

Lol I'm not upset at all. Go back to the N count threads and see how many clones you have.

Your epiphany is not new. Your persona shows up here every 3 days. With tiny variations.

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Haha, I love how you assume my n count to be high 🤣

So yes the higher the n count, the more likely they are to cheat, deadbedroom, and give you stds

Uh huh, I'd love to see some actual figures on this, it sounds like an awful lot of assumptions there.

If monogamy and traditional lifestyles were so great, why on earth did it change? Why was spousal abuse and spousal rape we had to create laws to get husbands to treat their wives right?

And you like the vast majority of promiscuous women see sex as a scratch, something meaningless, something you get out of your system.

Sex can absolutely be meaningless fun between people, not everything needs to be so hard thought through, we dont have to be virgins to be happy...

It's not about body movement and body gyrations or girth and size. Most guys acknowledge they won't be the biggest and the fastest. They understand that it is an intimate act, and women are so promiscuous in America that they see if as a handshake hence why so many promiscous women are "low libido" aka can't buzz

To get a woman aroused it is absolutely about technique and paying attention to your partner, now you're just excusing two pump chumps who roll over and fall asleep.if you can't satisfy a woman, I hate to break it to you, its because you're bad in bed, there is literally only one person at fault!

Men treat sex lower than women do! Porn addiction, masterbation addiction and sex addiction are all things that affect men at a much higher rate than women, its not even close but yeah its totally sacred to Jim who can't keep his hand off his dick while he sits on the bus 🤣🤣🤣 christ, next you're going to tell me that it's women's fault wars are started and we're also responsible for testicular cancer 🤣

[–]StupidWhiteBoi3 points 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Promiscuous women absolutely see sex as a scratch and meaningless. I'm saying promiscuous women can't buzz and release less oxytocin and the average hubby despite breaking his back to make her happy in every way will screwed over and deadbedroomed.

wide range of past partner counts (0 up to 60+) in both short-term and long-term contexts. The willingness to date first rose with a moderate number of past partners (2-3 considered being ideal) but then fell dramatically when the number became very high (15+). For long-term mates there was virtually no sex difference—both men and women showed equal reluctance toward potential mates with extremely extensive sexual histories (pg.1102). Co-author Steve Stewart-Williams, professor of psychology at the University of Nottingham, was quoted saying in 2016, “we can’t always trust widespread views about men and women. A lot of people are convinced that the sexual double standard is alive and well in the Western world. But our study and many others suggest that it’s a lot less common than it used to be. It’s not that no one cares about a potential mate’s sexual history; most people do care. But people seem to be about as reluctant to get involved with a man with an extensive sexual history as they are a woman”. Co-author Andrew G. Thomas, senior lecturer in the School of Psychology at Swansea University (in the United Kingdom), wrote in 2021, “Men were slightly more forgiving of a large sexual history than women… In short, there was very little evidence for a “double standard”. Responding the the study, Justin Lehmiller (2017), social psychologist and research fellow at the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University, wrote, “Men’s and women’s ratings were similar for long-term partners”.

Busch & Saldala-Torres (2024) surveyed 853 heterosexual participants using vignettes to examine how sexual history and relationship type influence perceptions and desirability. While the traditional Sexual Double Standard (SDS)—where women are judged more harshly than men—was not supported, a Reverse Sexual Double Standard (R-SDS) emerged. Heterosexual women consistently rated men with 12 prior sexual partners, especially from casual relationships, less favorably than men with only one partner, and less favorably than comparable women. Overall, heterosexual participants showed a strong preference for targets with fewer partners and from committed relationships, but penalized men far more than women for higher sexual experience. Co-author Tara M. Busch (2024), social psychologist and assistant professor of psychology at the University of North Carolina at Pembroke, was quoted: “I was expecting women to be judged harsher for higher numbers of sexual partners, but that wasn’t what we found, men were judged harsher”.

Weber and Friese (2024) examined societal evaluations of male and female sexual behavior across two samples totaling 342 German participants. The researchers introduced the concept of the Ideal Level of Sexual Activity (ILSA), finding that moderate levels of sexual activity—neither very low nor very high—were viewed most favorably for both men and women. However, the ideal number of sexual partners was consistently higher for men (approximately 4–5) than for women (around 2–3), and deviations above or below these levels were penalized differently by gender. Specifically, high sexual activity was judged more harshly for women, while low sexual activity was viewed more negatively for men. The authors wrote, “contrary to common assumptions, moderate rather than extremely low or extremely high levels of sexual activity are most valued for both genders” (11/12).

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Online surveys and articles:

In 2016, Superdrug surveyed over 2,000 people in the U.S. and Europe, and determined that female respondents placed the threshold of “too promiscuous” at 15.2 partners (while for males it was 14), with men and women converging on 7-8 partners as the ideal.

In a 2017 Dr. Ed survey of 1,000 Americans and Europeans, women in their 20s to 40s generally viewed 10 past sexual partne

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The extension of your logic is that it's entitlement and insecurity to ever reads again criticise the fact that someone cares about? Okay - do you have an end point in mind? Because you go right on to say that the demands of these girls are unreasonable too. I think they equally are.

I don't think it's really entitlement or insecurity on my part, I don't have a personal stake. I've only dated one person, he's never dated anyone else either, we've been together about a decade and if something happened there I don't imagine I'd date again because the modern dating scene seems crazy. I don't have a wild past I'm looking to have validated. Just seems crazy to say most people would have an issue with their partner having ever loved or been with another person when it's demonstrably untrue if you look at actual adults living in the world who date each other knowing their histories.

[–]PSXSnack09No Pill Man 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

you re not criticizin the idea, you re strawmanning the person which is different, ad hominen falacies in dating denote massive insecurity.

Because you go right on to say that the demands of these girls are unreasonable too.

is unreasonable to believe your boyfriend doesnt loves you if he doesnt gifts you a basket every year, the same way it is unreasonable to believe wife doesnt loves you if she doesnt sleeps with you X times a year, but i dont see hows that related to wanting to be your special one first or at least one of the select few who earned the privilege.

Just seems crazy to say most people would have an issue with their partner having ever loved or been with another person when it's demonstrably untrue if you look at actual adults living in the world who date each other knowing their histories.

Well thats a different story depending on how it is when you put it like that, but in the concept of this sub which is western hetero normative dating dynamics rarely involve just having loved somebody else before, it actually involves those crazy things you re scared about.

[–]Colt_MasterPurple Pill Man 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (32 children) | Copy Link

Q4 men who think promiscuous women are proner to deadbedrooming and/or settling: Which is more of a green flag, a woman who wants to sleep with you on the first date, or a woman who wants to wait until commitment to have sex?

If she sleeps with you early and before commitment, she probably kinda sees you as Chad because hook ups are proof of raw sexual attraction. However, it's likely proof that she's promiscuous in general as she also likely sleeps with a lot of people early on. Which means, she's likely fucked someone who's taller, hotter, bigger-dicked, more alpha than you. You'll never be her best. Probably also been alpha widowed by him. She's probably also been basically addicted to hook ups from having too many of them and now basically can't get aroused from monogamous sex, she'll actually deadbedroom you. And all the other problems related to promiscuity. Sounds pretty bad.

If she wants to wait though, maybe she's chaste, but how do you know for sure? Maybe it's because she's not attracted to you that much? Would Chad have to wait? She likely has already had her fun in the past, now wants to go slow with you and vet how steady and reliable you are. What if there's guys around she didn't make wait? Guys she had raw desire for, but now she's decided it's time to settle down with the "husband material" guy, so you'll be getting the less adventurous less enthusiastic version of herself, basically Chad's sloppy seconds? Also sounds pretty bad.

Maybe women who sleep with you on the third date or so are best? Or maybe it's the worst of both worlds: she neither has enough raw attraction for you to sleep with you on the first date (like she would with Chad), nor is that chaste to begin with.

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i dont think promiscuous women are more prone to a deadbedroom or settling due to something morally broken or malicious about them, i see it more a byproduct of the way they conceptualize love and relationships, though i wouldnt call them a redflag.

as for the rest, i dont think a woman who waits is more of a greenflag but i do think it is worthy of praise and we all should strive to do the same, and i do think is very emotionally fulfiling and rewarding to be picked by someone like that, though i dont chase casual sex myself and i think guys should hold themselves to the same standards they want in a potential life long partner.

imo caring about how socio-restricted a woman is, is incompatible with wanting an adventorous woman who will sleep like you like if it was porn, im more than happy with a boring vanilla relationship, but if a guy wants an adventorous woman then maybe a promiscuous one is a better match for him

[–]Cultural-Ad-8486Slavic Purple Pill Man -1 points0 points1 point 1 year ago (14 children) | Copy Link

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I think I was talking about the intensity of attraction then? I don't remember exactly

Here it is, did you mean all along that hook ups make women asexualish to begin with? I dunno if that's congruent

https://np.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/s/ERR4TUkxBC

Well, here it is. I think I wrote and made a post here a long time ago that the reason for the so-called "male lack of self-confidence sexually" is not lack of self-confidence but a legitimate fear that their partner will not be attracted to them.

So when there is direct evidence that your partner desires you, then I don't see how problems can arise

Moreover, as I already said, the advantage of monogamy is that we can **gradually** increase sexual tension and study everything together.

So as long as this woman wants to study new ways of romance and sex with me, our relationship, then I also don't see any problems

Regarding all this, fair enough

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[–]Colt_Master1 point 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

If you like anal, get a gf who likes anal. Why are you trying to instead get a "experimentative" gf who will try anal once but then not want to do it anymore since she dislikes it? Or a doormat gf who will do it to make you happy but grow resentment over it? And if you just like experimentation in general and want a similar gf that's okay, but it's merely a preference and not something that has to do with someone being a good or bad partner.

very often these women do not work with their "mental" trauma and completely withdraw into themselves

Healing trauma associated to certain sexual acts is not trivial and if she doesn't want to "work on it" because you want to do that sexual act that's just a sign of incompatibility. Just break up if it's a deal breaker instead of trying to shame her that if she loved you she'd push through it. I also don't know why you say "these women" as if promiscuity had anything to do with it. Same thing if what you mean is that they're lying because they suspect they you'll push them into it unless they gave you that lie - again, widespread concept completely divorced from "these women".

[–]Cultural-Ad-84862 points 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

I don't like anal on its own. I want to try it with a partner and decide if **both of us** like it or not.

That's how it works, and that's the whole point of experimenting in a couple - to figure out what you both like.

And yes, that's what a good partner does - listen to the desires of their loved one and look for compromises if necessary.

But that doesn't mean that someone can't have red lines. That's normal and I have them. But the important thing is that I didn't have to taste shit to understand that it's bad.

I'd probably even try pegging if my girlfriend wanted to. Does the idea of a girl stretching my ass turn me on? Probably not, but I'm not disgusted either. So why not?

And yes, people need to heal their traumas, including traumas related to sex. Supporting your partner is fine, but why the hell are you "punishing" your new partner for the mistakes of some past asshole? I thought the past didn't matter, right?

[–]Colt_Master1 point 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

And yes, that's what a good partner does - listen to the desires of their loved one and look for compromises if necessary.

LIKING experimentation or not is what has nothing to do with being a good or bad partner. It's just a preference.

I didn't have to taste shit to understand that it's bad.

Case in point.

And FYI if you aren't aware: inexperienced women and/or women who like experimentation will experiment with you out of personal interest, not out of benevolence or being better partners (in general) than women who don't want to experiment. Those same women who like experimenting can be uncompromising and confrontational in plenty of other different fields.

But that doesn't mean that someone can't have red lines. That's normal and I have them.

Evidently nowhere near enough. You seem overly compromising and unconfrontational regarding the desires of other people, so then you grow resentful when they don't give the favor back and accommodate your desires in return.

Compromise isn't the only method of conflict resolution. And endless compromise between two incompatible people leads to resentment and mediocre relationships, something you should look out for in the first place.

Not doing something just because you dislike it is a perfectly acceptable explanation and plenty of successful relationships have that general rule of thumb. Mutually deciding to not partake in activities that either person dislikes is not inherently better than both people doing things they dislike just to make their partner momentarily happy (until the shoe gets on the other foot).

And yes, people need to heal their traumas, including traumas related to sex. Supporting your partner is fine, but why the hell are you "punishing" your new partner for the mistakes of some past asshole?

And this is an extremely unhealthy outlook. Your gf not wanting to push past her trauma has everything to do with the discomfort she'd suffer from it and nothing to do with "past assholes", her trauma being caused by past assholes is not an argument for why she should hurry up and fix it any faster than if it was caused by other reasons.

Do you lose sleep from promiscuous women not wanting to experiment because of thoughts like "her ex got more out of her than me" "If she did X with her ex but not with me it has to be because she liked him more", "an asshole enjoyed her when she was baggage-free and now I'm suffering from it"? Because it'd do you good to recognize these thoughts for what they are: jealousy. And although you can simply avoid these feelings by staying away from their source (women with sexual pasts), it'd also do you good to become aware of them, analyze and manage them. When it comes down to it, your decision to be or not with a woman of this kind should have to do with compatibility in your sexual tastes, not with these neurotic jealous thoughts.

[–]Cultural-Ad-84862 points 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

It's just a preference

NO, it's not a preference.

This is what separates a good partner who cares from those who don't care about their partner's interests.

inexperienced women and/or women who like experimentation will experiment with you out of personal interest, not out of benevolence or being better partners (in general) than women who don't want to experiment

Although I doubt it, but even so, women who want to experiment are still a step above those who do not. They really want to let us know better what is relevant for us and how we want to see the relationship. They are the ones who are good partners.

You seem overly compromising and unconfrontational regarding the desires of other people, so then you grow resentful when they don't give the favor back and accommodate your desires in return

Living by the "golden rule" is living a good life. You have to be good to those who reciprocate your kindness.

Compromise isn't the only method of conflict resolution

Ep.

Compromise is not the only option, but often the most positive one if the interests of several people do not coincide.

And without COMPROMISES it is impossible to build at least somewhat strong relationships. It doesn't even matter if they are romantic or just friends. Not that promiscuous people need such relationships 🤷‍♂️

And this is an extremely unhealthy outlook

Quite the opposite, it's very healthy.

If "the past doesn't matter" then this shouldn't matter either.

It's literally the same as a guy whose ex-girlfriend cheated on him and he dumps a load of shit on his new girlfriend out of mistrust and toxicity.

Because it'd do you good to recognize these thoughts for what they are: jealousy.

I don't think I need to state that jealousy is not only normal but also an obligatory part of a monogamous relationship? If you don't feel jealous that your partner loves someone or, God forbid, loves more than you, then you are weird and mentally unhealthy.

Thank God, the love of being a cuckold is not mainstream and never will be

[–]Colt_Master1 point 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

https://english.elpais.com/society/2023-11-26/anal-sex-in-women-why-it-is-still-taboo-and-why-the-end-of-prejudice-is-getting-closer.html

"According to a survey conducted by LELO, 35% of respondents practice anal sex. Among those who do not, 44% said that although they are willing to try it [...]"

(1-0.35)*(1-0.44) = 36.4% of people are seemingly automatically bad partners apparently, just at minimum, with likely more when accounting all venues of sexual exploration.

It's literally the same as a guy whose ex-girlfriend cheated on him and he dumps a load of shit on his new girlfriend out of mistrust and toxicity.

That is not how sexual trauma works, at least the one I'm talking about. It's marked by symptoms like PTSD and triggers, not "mistrust and toxicity".

I don't think I need to state that jealousy is not only normal but also an obligatory part of a monogamous relationship? If you don't feel jealous that your partner loves someone or, God forbid, loves more than you, then you are weird and mentally unhealthy.

Thank God, the love of being a cuckold is not mainstream and never will be

I was talking about jealousy in the context of being jealous at men of their sexual pasts for getting experiences that you didn't with the examples I put being focused on that, after you commented that not hurrying up to work on sexual trauma is punishing ur bf for what an asshole did and that "people can often sacrifice their comfort for the sake of a partner they find extremely attractive", meanwhile you now soften up now and talk about monogamous relationships, the present and cucking. If you aren't backtracking and being disingenuous, for your sake I hope that you can notice the difference.

[–]YldutsRed Pill Man 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (38 children) | Copy Link

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We showed you these stats before. Why is it hard to understand that it's more likely, not 100%

2,654 married individuals and found that a higher number of lifetime sexual partners was consistently associated with lower sexual quality, communication, relationship satisfaction (in one age cohort), and stability—even after controlling for factors such as education, religiosity, and relationship length. No age group showed improved relationship outcomes with more sexual partners, supporting prior research linking multiple premarital partners to greater marital instability (pg.715).

Maddox-Shaw et al. (2013) conducted a study on 933 unmarried individuals (646 women and 347 men), examining predictors of extradyadic sexual involvement (ESI) in opposite-sex relationships over 20 months. Factors such as demographic characteristics, sexual history, mental health, communication, sexual dynamics, commitment, and personal sexual behavior, including the number of prior sex partners, were considered. Having more prior sex partners predicted a higher likelihood of future ESI (pg.607).

Campbell et al. (2009) (PDF) examined how women’s sociosexual orientation—essentially their sexual attitudes and behaviors—affected men’s perceptions of them as long-term partners. Using a sample of 140 college-aged women, the researchers found that women who were more sexually unrestricted (i.e., comfortable with casual sex and having had more partners) were rated by men as less desirable for long-term relationships and less trustworthy as they pose a greater risk of future infidelity.

Penke & Asendorpf (2008) (PDF) found in their large online study (N = 2,708) that men and women with a greater history of short-term (casual) relationships in the past were more likely to have multiple partners and unstable relationships in the future (pg.1131).

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Marital Stability and Divorce Rates:
- A study from the Institute for Family Studies (IFS), analyzing data from the National Survey of Family Growth (NSFG) from 2002, 2006–2010, and 2011–2013, found that women with 10 or more premarital sexual partners had the highest five-year divorce rates (33%) for marriages in the 2000s. This compares to 6% for women who were virgins at marriage and 11% for those with 0–1 partners in the 2010s. The study suggests that a higher number of premarital partners correlates with increased divorce risk, potentially implying challenges in maintaining long-term commitment, though it doesn’t directly measure loyalty (e.g., infidelity).
- The IFS study notes that this trend became more pronounced in recent years, as earlier decades (e.g., 1980s) showed women with two partners had higher divorce rates (28%) than those with 10+ partners (18%). This shift may reflect changing social attitudes toward premarital sex, but the data still associates higher partner counts with reduced marital stability.
Marital Happiness:
- Another IFS study (2018) found that women who had only slept with their spouse reported the highest marital happiness (65%), while those with 6–10 partners had the lowest odds of marital happiness (52%). Women with 10+ partners weren’t specifically isolated in this analysis, but the trend suggests a decline in marital satisfaction with more partners, which could indirectly relate to loyalty if dissatisfaction leads to disengagement or infidelity.
- The Wheatley Institute (2023) reported that married women with 10+ lifetime sexual partners were less likely to report high levels of relationship stability (14%) compared to those with only one partner (45%). Lower stability might suggest challenges in maintaining loyalty, though the study doesn’t explicitly measure infidelity.
Mental Health and Behavioral Outcomes:
- A 2013 cohort study found that women with more than 10 sexual partners in a given period were significantly more likely to develop substance dependence disorders (adjusted odds ratios of 9.6 at age 21, 7.3 at 26, and 17.5 at 32) compared to those with 0–1 partners. While this doesn’t directly address loyalty, it suggests that higher partner counts may be associated with riskier behaviors, which could impact relationship commitment. The study found no significant link between partner count and anxiety or depression.
- The study notes that women with multiple partners may engage in less emotionally connected sex (e.g., casual or “impersonal” sex), which could influence their ability to form stable, loyal relationships, though this is speculative and not directly tested.
Pair Bonding and Emotional Connection:
- A LinkedIn article (not peer-reviewed) discusses the “pair bonding” hypothesis, suggesting that women with multiple sexual partners may struggle to form deep emotional connections due to repeated bond-breaking from casual sex. It claims that each new partner creates a “synaptic map” that makes permanent bonding harder, potentially affecting loyalty in long-term relationships. However, this source lacks cited studies and is speculative, relying on unverified claims from the Medical Institute of Sexual Health, a group criticized for bias.
- A Medium article similarly discusses pair bonding, citing a 2015 IFS study by Wolfinger, which found women with 10+ partners were most likely to divorce. It suggests that multiple partners create reference points for comparison, potentially leading to dissatisfaction and reduced commitment in marriage. This is theoretical and not directly tied to loyalty (e.g., infidelity) but implies challenges in maintaining stable relationships.
Social Perceptions and Double Standards:
- A 2024 study in Social Psychological and Personality Science found that women with high sexual activity (e.g., 10+ partners) are judged less favorably by society compared to men with similar partner counts, reflecting a sexual double standard. This societal stigma might indirectly affect relationship dynamics, as women may face pressure or judgment that impacts their perceived loyalty or commitment. However, the study notes that moderate sexual activity (2–3 partners for women) is viewed most favorably, suggesting no direct link between high partner counts and perceived disloyalty.
Health Risks:
- The English Longitudinal Study of Ageing (2020) found that women with 10+ lifetime sexual partners had higher odds of cancer (OR 1.91) and limiting long-standing illnesses (OR 1.64) compared to those with 0–1 partners. While this doesn’t address loyalty, it indicates health risks associated with multiple partners, which could indirectly affect relationship stability if health issues strain partnerships.[](https://srh.bmj.com/content

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It's my favorite biweekly thread!

As the sub's premier expert on promiscuity, I take my duty very seriously.

In my expert opinion, the only people who are overly concerned about previous sexual partners are hypocrites and unsocialized people, both of which are rooted in insecurity.

Generally, adults don't care because most people assume someone has had sex previously.

Unless, of course, they are very religious. And even then, they might be doing other sexual acts.

Lastly, people who are very religious don't often date people who are slutty sluts. People who are inexperienced or lacking socialization aren't in the same spaces as the promiscuous social butterfly.

Stop worrying about things that don't ultimately concern you. Instead, focus on socializing and planning your next travel adventure.

[–]No_Self_21655 points 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]ThatBitchA1 point 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]No_Self_21654 points 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]ThatBitchA3 points 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]No_Self_21652 points 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]ThatBitchA3 points 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]No_Self_21652 points 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]ThatBitchA2 points 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]No_Self_21652 points 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]ThatBitchA2 points 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]Corbast73 points 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]PSXSnack091 point 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]Corbast72 points 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]Popeoath1 point 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]Corbast71 point 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]PSXSnack091 point 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]small-pp-small-smvDih Pilled Man 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]PSXSnack09 1 year ago [recovered] (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]ThatBitchA3 points 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]wtknightBlue-ish Married Passport Bro ♂︎[M] 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]PSXSnack091 point 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]Reasonable_Style82141 point 1 year ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Title	N COUNTS WEEKLY DISCUSSION THREAD
Author	AutoModerator
Upvotes	5
Comments	726
Date	June 7, 2025 4:00 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1l5o7nk/n_counts_weekly_discussion_thread/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/n-counts-weekly-discussion-thread.1554147 https://theredarchive.com/post/1554147

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