There was a highly upvoted post here a few days ago about how if you were not getting laid you (and only you) were to blame. People pointed out that while this may be true at a personal level, the environment also plays a huge role at a societal level.

Here is an example of that in action looking at speed dating, see: https://www0.gsb.columbia.edu/mygsb/faculty/research/pubfiles/867/datingFULL-EK1.pdf

The full article is 32 pages long and written in dry academic language which I know very few people here have the time to go through. Also the article is from 2005 and if anything things have only gotten worse since then.

So here is a nice write-up with cool graphs: https://flowingdata.com/2013/06/12/what-the-sexes-want-in-speed-dating/ which I recommend you read instead.

The whole article is very good, however for brevity I will focus on one single aspect showing the impact of the outside environment on group outcomes. The authors found that in events with larger group size (i.e. the number of men that women see at the event and vice versa) the women were significantly more selective, while the men's selectivity was essentially unchanged.

More concretely in events with 10 men and 10 women both men and women had a roughly 50% chance of saying "yes" to any given partner, i.e. on average the men and women both wanted to see 5 of the 10 people again. However in events with 20 men and 20 women, the men still had a roughly 50% chance of saying yes, meaning they wanted to on average see 10 of the 20 women again, but the rate of saying yes for the women fell down a cliff to 32.5%, with them just wanting to see on average 6.5 of the 20 men.

Note that these were completely randomised events from the same study, it isn't like the 10 man/women events took place in a different place under different rules to the 20 man/women events, but with the exact same rules and people were assigned to the 10 or 20 date events randomly, so we know that this difference in selectivity is caused by the increased pool size rather than anything else.

I think this ties in very nicely in showing how dating apps have made the whole landscape much much worse by massively increasing the pool of matches available to women. Just like how bigger pools made them more selective in speed dating, these apps make women more selective in real life which just serves to make finding a partner harder for the group of "men" as a whole.