how many of you go to bars/clubs alone?

Vigeto619 · 2022-06-25T18:26:12+00:00

If you have female friends going with them will help you out tremendously

Ambitious-Ice2357 · 2022-06-25T19:02:33+00:00

I have no problem going out alone. None. I’ll often go out to dinner alone and to nice restaurants. I’m not self conscious about it in the least. Idgaf! We’re all alone in this life, even if we’re in relationships.

DestinyChitChat · 2022-06-25T18:50:39+00:00

When I first started many years ago I basically had no choice, but to go alone. But it's pretty empowering so I highly recommend it.

Your focus should be meeting new friends. Women 2nd. So that means talking to everyone. Even the old guy sitting alone. Just be social. The women will naturally start to flock to you. Just whatever you do, don't sit on the wall staring out into the crowd all night. That's the worst thing you can do.

froze_gold · 2022-06-25T18:32:51+00:00

I go alone occasionally so I can get use to it. I talk to a few people here and there but mostly im chilling drinking whiskey neat trying to break myself off from needing a friend to visit bars.

Small steps out of the comfort zond

potfire · 2022-06-25T18:31:49+00:00

I’ve done it several times and generally enjoy it. It’s been successful when I do it with the intention of having fun for myself and not just to meet women. I think it’s extremely important for us as men to be comfortable with our own company and going to clubs and bars alone is a great way to work on this. Go out, talk to people, dance, have a good time, and people will notice. Best of luck!

unabletodisplay · 2022-06-25T22:04:56+00:00

TBH it's nicer to go out alone so I can do whatever the fuck I want.

blubbercup · 2022-06-25T19:27:58+00:00

I started going to dive bars alone recently, since most of my outgoing friends had left the city I lived in. Best advice I could think of is to go with no expectations of anything happening, and to get a drink right away and finish it quick.

With those 2 things in mind all I’ve done is that and just sit at the bar and try to strike up conversations best I can. I think the easiest way to do so is to find something you like about a stranger and compliment them on it. Saw a guy with orange crocs on, said I liked his style, next thing you know him and his friend were chatting with me for 45min. Rinse and repeat throughout the night and you can end up meeting some really cool people like I have. And if you’re lucky, like I was, you talk to a cute girl, get drinks, dance, and make some memories.

iceicebabyvanilla · 2022-06-25T19:33:34+00:00

Go to the same bar alone and get acquainted with the bartender. Tip heavy on the front end and thank them for helping you out.

Get to know some of the regulars. Introduce yourself to their friends. Buy em a round.

Once you go 5-7 times (bonus if there are bouncers and they dab you up on the way in), you will have a ton of success with women bc of the aura you produce.

Marathon, not a sprint. Go get it.

VanillaCider2021 · 2022-06-25T21:13:48+00:00

I do it and I love it.

Sometimes you can feel like a loner or "regular" but there are ways around this.

Dress well. Wear a blazer or jacket and tell people you are coming from work or an event in the area.

Going out alone forces you to talk to people. I think it's very healthy. I also think you are less of a threat to women vs a larger group of guys.

I'd say the majority of player type guys love and prefer going out alone.

Woujo · 2022-06-26T00:15:14+00:00

I do it all the time. Women rarely question it unless we are deep in a conversation, and I usually say something like:

- I came with my friends but they left because they were being lame.

- I came with my friend and he went home with a girl he just met

- I came with my friend and his girlfriend and I left because I didn't want to be a third wheel.

Or you can just say, "something awesome happened to me at work today and I wanted to come out and celebrate."

TheOtherSonOfGod · 2022-06-25T23:48:28+00:00

I don't understand you guys that go out in groups of 3 or 4 . I was a DJ at several clubs, and I've NEVER seen any guy get anything more than a phone number.

2022-06-25T22:12:45+00:00

I often go out alone. I enjoy going with friends too, but the ability to hop around at my leisure can be very liberating.

There was a moronic thread a few days ago where some retard compared guys who go solo to Ted Bundy. I’m here to tell you that it’s only weird if you make it weird.

thenhk23 · 2022-06-25T19:54:31+00:00

I do, well, bars only. I travel a lot for work so its difficult for me have an entourage, plus I dont drink lol.

I just go to the pubs to watch games etc. I always meet someone new every time I go both men and women. So I would highly recommend it. Just be confident.

Alive-Doughnut2345 · 2022-06-25T19:42:20+00:00

I’ve done it a couple times. Really want to try and do it more before I get too old. I can confirm it’s empowering and fun to get out of your routine/comfort zone. Just make sure to go in with zero expectations

Majestic_Meal_5655 · 2022-06-25T19:54:21+00:00

I've been going to bars alone for the past 10 years. It's fun. If shit sucks I can leave and go to the next without hurting anyone's feelings. I can go and do whatever I want with out judgment.

ZachMoore88 · 2022-06-25T20:16:17+00:00

I've done it many times in the past year and I'd just like to echo the other coments about being friendly with everyone. It's a good form of social proof.

SadBox4529 · 2022-06-25T21:03:33+00:00

Going alone will make you act out of character from what I’ve noticed. It’s better to go with a friend or friends because your attention isn’t on chicks 24/7.

SmartWonderWoman · 2022-06-25T23:17:05+00:00

I do. It’s okay. I like it. Would prefer a partner tho 😬

WussPoppin93 · 2022-06-25T23:45:22+00:00

I went to a bar alone last weekend cuz its right next door, but i feel like im too old (29m) to approach the girls there, since its like a college bar, so i just hangout and talk to the bartenders. Feels kinda awkward but not too bad

skrtskerskrt · 2022-06-26T01:17:48+00:00

It's something every man has to try at least once for the experience in itself. It takes an adjustment to create your own fun but can be well worth it. If ladies question you on it, your confidence level determines how well you can sell that off.

Environmental_Work63 · 2022-06-25T22:06:55+00:00

I did it last month when there was a ufc event. I usually get a whiskey neat and the chads were nice to me. I recommend going out alone for fight night and go with the intention of cheering and being one of the bros. I’m trying to find new events I like for my outings so I’m taking recommendations as well. I’m also a foodie, so I’m trying out new restaurants alone.

burncushlikewood · 2022-06-26T01:55:04+00:00

What you can do is link up with a guy at the bar/club to temp wingman you

Sandvicheater · 2022-06-26T02:06:14+00:00

He who travels alone travels quickest to bed with a woman.

Mc_Dickles · 2022-06-26T03:33:33+00:00

Sometimes you just gotta butt yourself into a conversation, shoot your opinion, and then extend your arm and introduce yourself. If that scares you, just know it’s MUCH easier with alcohol.

EfficiencyOk766 · 2022-06-26T05:39:17+00:00

Ironically, actual clubs (majority dances) are very unfriendly for groups. The only time your group of friends matters is on the way to the Club. Once inside you cant really have normal conversations anyway and in smoking/chill areas there are usually many crazy and interesting people to talk with. I go often to underground Techno Clubs alone whenever a good DJ is on line up and no one wants to Join me.

chiefchief23 · 2022-06-26T06:24:15+00:00

Those are tough to pull off. Going to a concert or festival solo is the move.

2girls4every1 · 2022-06-26T07:06:33+00:00

Having a group of guys to go with can also suck. They can hold you back, be secretly jelouse or develop animosity twords you because your getting more attention then them.. you will also end up babysitting the idiots who cant maintain themselves. Also most times other dudes will just screw up everything or get in your way. I honestly wouldn't recommend it. Lots of Drama comes from it an men can be such crybabies and children. If your able go with a female friend whos also looking for fun.

PTYReborn · 2022-06-26T07:36:20+00:00

Just went to a bar yesterday and had like 4 wingwomen try and help me get a girl by the end of the night, but no luck. How do you put yourself out there without looking desperate or awkward to a stranger?

Good_Posture · 2022-06-26T09:28:53+00:00

I'm a pretty introverted and reserved guy but I go out alone often and make it work - most of the time. It took me a while to realise my intention should be to go out and have fun, not meet people. If I tried to force meeting people I neither had fun nor met anyone (I guess the ''desperation'' was obvious). Once I adpoted the ''have fun first'' approach, naturally I would start speaking to more people.

For this reason I choose venues where there is something to do. Find the bars that have live music or bars that bring a DJ in for later hours, or go to a bar when there is a big game on. It has to be something that interestss you, though. This gives me something to get in to and focus on and then use that to connect with others. Nobody wants to talk to a quiet dude standing against the wall, but if you are getting in to the band/music/singer, getting amped at whatever a sports team is doing, people notice the positive, engaging energy and it opens opportunities for meeting both like-minded guys and on a good night, women.

Becoming a regular at a bar you like is also beneficial. Getting to know the bar staff, the doormen (if they have any), the other regulars and even the owner(s) is great social proof as well. You're not the lame guy alone, you're the guy that knows everybody.

It doesn't always work and that is another skill I had to learn, identifiying when you yourself are just not in the right space mentally (feeling a little low on energy/confidence or just in a bad mood) or the whole vibe isn't just for you. Cut your losses, finish your drink and head out.

I haven't received any negative or weird responses when someone figures out that I am alone, possibly because I own it.

rjones416 · 2022-06-25T18:54:38+00:00

when i was younger and really into clubbing i did it a few times. i had fun but stopped doing it. i just preferred going with friends. also depends where you're going its not safe to be alone.

mookyvon · 2022-06-25T23:25:21+00:00

Take it from someone who’s done it. You’ll get nothing done alone. Why would any girl leave her friends to go with you? Better to daygame alone.

Chicxulub420 · 2022-06-26T06:30:16+00:00

Going sober to a bar with the sole intention of picking up drunk women is borderline date rape

Mrsowrong · 2022-06-26T00:32:34+00:00

Imperator_Pyra · 2022-06-25T22:23:30+00:00

I don't, but that's because I only do daygame. I'm not discouraging you from doing that if that's what you want, it's just not for me.

Also, online game doesn't really transfer much to real life, but hey, here's your chance to prove me wrong.

pdcGhost · 2022-06-26T03:49:12+00:00

I go to bars and clubs alone, haven't been very successful getting laid due to the load music and the as for mentioned groups/with presumably boyfriends. I still go out to check out the bars. I like Beercades a lot.

MK2718 · 2022-06-26T16:11:19+00:00

How to go out alone to socialize

poet0588 · 2022-06-26T16:32:09+00:00

I go by myself most of the time. If you have some social skills, going alone helps. But like everyone said going out with female friends is a power up. The few times I have done that. A lot of women were in my orbit.

bluemind361 · 2022-06-26T16:57:03+00:00

I’ve done it many times and met new people often. You have to be confident enough to strike up conversations with people though. Sometimes people start talking to you.

SamuRonin90 · 2022-06-26T18:38:41+00:00

I am very new to the game and grueling work and mental stress which comes with it. In my last 3 weeks of trying. Going alone worked the best for me but you have to be in a certain state of self confidence. You must be in the zone or get in the zone before approaching and mood must be high. You don't have to care and just enjoy otherwise it brings mental trauma for the rest of the next day.

Secondly, if you are going with friends then just enjoy and don't make game the priority else you won't be able to do either and it will feel really bad afterwords. I am not saying don't try if there is a chance. The focus should be enjoying the night with friends.

i_love_crazy_hobos · 2022-06-26T21:52:25+00:00

You don't need to drink. I go out alone all the time. Didn't have enough wings in this city to have friends with me, and often wings I did have didn't want to approach, so I would even prefer to go alone.

Males go out alone much more often than women, but still not that much. I'd say go with wings if you can, but if not, definitely go out alone.

Title	how many of you go to bars/clubs alone?
Author	Apprehensive-Farm384
Upvotes	215
Comments	113
Date	June 25, 2022 6:08 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/vkks8o/how_many_of_you_go_to_barsclubs_alone/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-many-of-you-go-to-barsclubs-alone.1256102 https://theredarchive.com/post/1256102

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