About catcalling...

NoGodsNoLabels · 2018-12-30T18:48:02+00:00

I'm a guy and I've been "dogcalled" a few times in my life. It just happens.

I've also had random women grabbing my butt in clubs.

Littleknownfacts · 2018-12-30T18:43:38+00:00

I get cat called every couple of months. I tend to dress professionally but I live in the middle of a big city and walk to and from work. It used to happen more when I took the subway. I would say there's definitely certain demographics of men that are more prone to it.

sketch162000 · 2018-12-30T18:50:44+00:00

I'm a guy and I've never catcalled anyone before, but actually I've been catcalled in Jersey one time. It was definitely creepy, but then again she looked like a crack whore, so the creep level probably depends on who's doing it.

Arlybigstickk · 2018-12-30T21:59:50+00:00

Living in big cities all my life and working construction for 15 years, I've only ever met 1 co worker who catcalled. And it was the annoying whistle. Everyone gave him shit and that was the last we ever heard it get done.

So being on a construction site with 50+ people in 3 different million+cities for the last 15 years, I've heard it happen once.... I'm VERY sceptical on how often its happened.

My wife sitting next to me shared this tidbit with me. Shes never been catcalled ever. And her bestfriend who is a 9/10 model like woman has only been catcalled 3 times in her life... my skeptisism grows.

There is nothing wrong with you. You arnt too ugly or unapproachable. Treat these statements with skepticism.

Another thing I'd like to add. Being a construction worker, if a phenomenally attractive woman is jogging by in a sports bra and yoga pants, we normally stop what we're doing to look, we try to be discreet. But I'm sure they know.. does that count as cat calling? I'm not sure. Trying to be as transparent as possible though.

diffdedbed · 2018-12-30T23:03:58+00:00

In a major metro, my wife got aggressivly cat called by black men all the time.

Now in the white burbs, oddly no cat calling.

lifeisasongyouknow · 2018-12-30T17:01:03+00:00

There is a bit of a cultural component to this I'd say around the US.

I never get catcalled EVER in the midwest. Just doesn't really happen.

When I'm on the coasts? All the fucking time. Also happens in large cities in the south a ton.

[deleted] · 2018-12-30T19:50:28+00:00

I remember an incident a long time ago. A truck driver catcalled a chick with a great ass telling her, "Your ass is perfect, baby"! The chick had got used to being catcalled so much that she replied, "This ass has taken way too many dicks in, that's why it looks so perfect"! The truck driver lost his speech and left immediately.

WhatIsTheMeaningHere · 2018-12-30T20:13:21+00:00

Catcalling is beta behavior..it is giving women attention and getting nothing in return

GradualDecomp · 2018-12-30T17:23:05+00:00

It depends on what city I'm living in, and what neighborhoods in those cities. Because I've mostly lived in major metropolitan areas and often in population dense neighborhoods within those cities, it's been pretty much a daily thing since puberty for me. Maybe twice a week in Eugene, every damn day in San Francisco. There are other factors, like that I prefer to take the train to work instead of drive, I take a lot of walks, and I have noticeably large breasts for my figure. Maybe I have an approachable air, I don't know. I am attractive.

I currently live in LA and I can't remember the last time I went 48 hours without a stranger yelling at me, following me, or approaching me going about my day to ask for my number, a date, or something a bit more graphic.

Texastentialism · 2018-12-30T17:11:07+00:00

I have the same experience as you. I'm not sure I've ever been catcalled in my life; the entire concept seems really foreign to me. From talking to other women who have experienced it I've come to the conclusion that a few factors determine whether a woman will experience catcalling.

Location. Catcalling tends to be a big city thing, generally concentrated in downtown/central areas.
How much you walk. If you drive everywhere there's less opportunity for catcalling.
Ethnicity. Certain ethnic groups are more prone to catcalling than others. If you live in an area where those ethnic groups aren't prominent, you're less likely to experience catcalling.
How you carry yourself. Some women just have a more approachable look about them, or a sexy walk/presence. These women seem more likely to be catcalled.

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2018-12-30T17:22:17+00:00

no one wants to admit that "catcalling" has an ethnic and class component. if youre not beign catcalled you are 1. gross or 2. in an all anglo/germanic/scandi middle class and up area

oftheinfinite · 2018-12-30T17:13:55+00:00

It has happened to me quite a bit, but I don’t know why.

Edit: why the downvotes?

couldbemage · 2018-12-30T18:24:53+00:00

Really don't understand what any guy gets out of catcalling

muabirdie · 2018-12-31T04:10:08+00:00

I always bring up this story when someone talks about 'what catcalling is' - once I was on my way to meet up with some friends to see a movie, looking (I felt) pretty nice since we were getting dinner after and I had more time than usual to do my makeup, and a guy skateboarded past, slowed slightly, tipped his snapback, and said 'your hair is the color of corn!' in an oddly complimentary way.

I said 'thank you, have a nice day!' after him, and he said 'you too, take care!' and I thought 'that was... nice of him to say, maybe?' and went to the movie sort of chuckling over it, since my hair is very yellow, and mostly forgot about it until I was driving home.

That wasn't, in my view, a catcall - by all accounts, he wasn't trying to make me uncomfortable, and he didn't succeed. I don't really know what he looked like, it wasn't a 'nice' area and it's not like he was skateboarding wearing a suit. He just had a comment and thought he should share it and did, politely, and left.

On the other hand, the 'catcalling' story I've shared here is the one where, like a few months back, an older guy pulled over on the side of a secluded road (in a fairly nice neighborhood) while I was in full work gear and weighed down with the equipment I'd been using to log gas exchange in a swamp, honked his horn until I looked up, said 'need a ride, baby?' and sped off before I could respond. It was a nice car, a nice neighborhood, he was probably someone's dad, but he saw an opportunity to make someone feel uncomfortable and he took it so that he could feel powerful.

I rarely run into situations that I would describe as catcalling when dressed to the nines. A look isn't a catcall, a 'looking good!' isn't a catcall unless accompanied by intimidation, more often than not the men who speak to me on the street, like the women who speak to me on the street, are making an observation or have a question or notice something distinctive that I'm wearing. They probably wouldn't feel so comfortable saying what they do to an older man, but that's a tradeoff for looking approachable. People ask for directions, people weigh in on your sparkly boots.

On the other hand, I encounter situations that I would call 'catcalling' in the same sort of situations that anyone would be vulnerable to bullying. I'm inconvenienced, clearly distressed/sick, eating a large burrito, and a man says or does something cruel to provoke a reaction because it's easy and it makes him feel powerful. Catcalling is dressed-up bullying, in my view, and 'bullying' is subjective, of course, but it's all about power.

NalkaNalka · 2018-12-30T17:21:34+00:00

The people that complain about catcalling generally live in "urban" and "diverse" neighborhoods.

Thisismybot8 · 2018-12-30T17:43:21+00:00

Definitely a regional thing. I used to live in Egypt and catcalling was as common as breathing. In the US (northeast, south), I have almost never seen it happen. Women should really be more thankful for the environment the US provides them.

bitter_samsara · 2018-12-30T17:33:58+00:00

It mostly happens to me around my neighborhood. Good thing they're cute! I usually just leave a little can of Fiskas out for them once in a while. Took one of them in to get a parvo shot the other day, and I scratched his ear.

couldbemage · 2018-12-30T18:54:49+00:00

That really famous video about street harassment could pass as a white supremacist propaganda video about dangerous minorities threatening white women. Catcalling is definitely a cultural thing.

I-IV-I64-V-I · 2018-12-30T23:47:00+00:00

I've noticed it depends on location, people in Chicago catcall a lot more than say, people in Georgia. (I've always found his weird, because I've never been under dressed at any point in that city because it's frigid and windy.)

Also, depends of ones relative looks vs population of place.

You may not personally be vexxed by it, maybe it doesn't bother you, maybe you kind of like it the one or two times it happens because it makes you feel wanted, maybe But for a lot of people, it's a daily occurrence to be followed, called sexual phrases, or even receive unwanted groping.

hshsvdhsiabs · 2018-12-31T01:16:49+00:00

When I do get hit on it’s usually done in respectful ways. One guy did kinda stand in front of the door of the steam room at my gym so I couldn’t get out and that was super annoying but I still felt safe because the gym staff was in the building. Though I do look quite young for my age and I think most guys are too afraid to hit on me because even though I’m 20, I could pass as 16.

blackedoutfast · 2018-12-30T21:16:57+00:00

a LOT of the women who complain the most about getting catcalled and harassed by random men are imagining it. they want to get catcalled because they think that means they are attractive and desireable. it's a fantasy.

[deleted] · 2018-12-30T20:18:24+00:00

I lived in the south and midwest. In small towns and major cities. I have NEVER seen it happen in my 55 years on this planet.

I think it is a Major Major urban area thing carried out by men of a lower social/ economic demographic.

I mean do these men actually think it will work?

shoup88 · 2018-12-30T20:56:41+00:00

I don’t get catcalled often. Definitely less than once a year. Happened more when I was a teenager by men in cars driving by. Has happened occasionally by men passing me in the street, making comments under their breath or sexual sounds only I can hear.

I lived most of my life in a midsize Canadian city. Got it worst when I stayed briefly in Paris and different parts of Italy.

Regal_Newt · 2018-12-30T21:12:58+00:00

Followed on a regular basis? Not for most women. But, the fact that most women will be followed home by men at least once or twice in their lifetime is still very concerning. As far as catcalling, it depends where you are. I live in the suburbs of a medium to small sized city. I get catcalled about 3 times a year. However, on a visit to NYC, I got catcalled about 5x a day.

ayeayefitlike · 2018-12-30T21:56:53+00:00

I’ve had it happen quite a few times, but usually when I’m not looking my best or am in fancy dress or something and look awful - it’s a mockery thing rather than a flattery thing IME. That’s why I hate it. A genuine compliment is never a problem.

ihatespunk · 2018-12-31T01:51:22+00:00

I live in the midwest and had it happen a lot as a teen growing up in the suburbs riding a bicycle or walking around town, and then a little less living in chicago as a pedestrian/mass transit user. Since I've started driving a car everywhere I rarely encounter it, though I have had dudes try to get my attention and one even followed me halfway around the city, asking for my number at every light. I'd say it started when I was 10-11 and just getting boobs. I'm now almost 32. I have a reasonably attractive face but I've always been fat, even as a kid. I have no idea what makes it happen more to some people and less than others.

Library-brat · 2018-12-31T02:25:04+00:00

I find it definitely depends on neighborhoods. Where I grew up, it was basically unheard of, I don’t think I or a single one of my friends experienced it. But my college was centralized in a very poor neighborhood and the instant I set foot off campus to walk to a grocery store or a friends house, it was very unlikely that I wouldn’t get catcalled. Most of my friends experienced it numerous times as well, and a few of them were even followed back to their apartments. But it was a poor area well known for attractive college aged girls, so I think the culture definitely made cat calling more likely.

rhyth7 · 2018-12-31T03:52:49+00:00

I think it has to do with population density and culture. Most cultures around the world really don't give a shit about women and it's perfectly acceptable to comment loudly about a woman's body in public. Also, if you live in a place where people aren't usually hanging around in the street, you're not gonna get catcalled or harassed. So big cities with many people of different cultures are gonna have more catcallers and harassers. In my experience also, poorer men tend to catcall more as well. This isn't pc, but white hicks and Latinos and Arabs are the types who do this type of stuff, at least in my state, which is mostly rural. Usually people who are newly immigrated. Second gen are more likely to see women as equals than their immigrant parents. But also, if you work in a male dominated industry like factories. I have been catcalled in every factory I've worked since there are few females around but only when I was new. After a few months they see you as just another employee.

CatchPhraze · 2018-12-31T04:41:18+00:00

The issue is it's gross and the fact you say it's happened even twice IS the issue. It should be happening 0 times to everyone.

I get catcalled once every couple of months, once a week when I was into the party scene, and followed, gosh maybe once 1-2 years or so.

Hardly a daily issue, but like does it need to be for us to find it annoying/scary/wrong?

rainisthelife · 2018-12-31T05:59:36+00:00

I would say it happens to me about 3-4 times a month. But I live in a big multiethnic city, so that might be contributing to it. In the summertime, that number increases to at least 2-3 times a week. I also go out more often in the summer, so maybe that’s why?

Also, not all catcalling are vulgar comments. Some men actually say nice things when they catcall me. I’ve even said thank you a few times when the comment was nice and I found it flattering. I mostly ignore the vulgar ones, although I did make a nasty comment about one guys’ height when the guy made some comment about my ass and riding. He looked angry afterwards. I wasn’t in a very good mood that day lol.

[deleted] · 2019-01-11T13:29:16+00:00

Do guys here ever 'catcall' and why would you do it? Is there a particular type of woman you catcall?

No.

One can answer a lot of questions by asking "Is it beneficial for men to do X" and if the answer is "no" then you can safely assume that the majority of men are probably not doing it.

[deleted] · 2018-12-30T17:43:52+00:00

I find it strange too, as in my country, Brazil it is supposed to be rampant, yet I never cat called, nor I know anyone who has. My sister is bothered by men hitting on her, but catcalling is almost non existant even for her. And she is by no means ugly (from the neck down tho).

I wonder if this is more of a cultural thing which does not happen anymore. Maybe it happened a lot in our grandfathers time and those who lived this time think it still happens today, when it doesnt.

Or maybe it is because I always lived in towns or at least villages. Maybe in rural places this could be more prone to happen.

[deleted] · 2018-12-30T17:56:47+00:00

I catcalled a couple of women when I was 14. But that's about it.

kandyapplez · 2018-12-30T19:47:00+00:00

i get catcallled a ton (predominantly by young minorities). its more common in the summer though

do you actually commute via something besides immediately getting into your car?

SafeAffect · 2018-12-31T00:48:51+00:00

What you see are feminists brazenly exaggerating their “struggles” to stay relevant...ever notice how it’s the least likely women to experience it that always complain about it?

I’m a guy and a car full of men did it to me one time which I imagine was a joke because it was at night and I’m ugly.

i_have_a_semicolon · 2018-12-30T17:33:04+00:00

It's definitely contextual. I get cat called when walking on a hot summer day, not bundled on a cold winter night. In the winter I think "omg, now that I'm 2x I'm finally invisible to men". But the summer comes a long and boom, like clockwork the catcalls begin.

There have been a few times in the winter where I've been stopped. I remember once I was about 18 or 21 or something and I was told I looked 12. 12!!? That is ok with me that now I'm 27 and can pass off as 20.

I simply assume the day will come when I will be invisible to most men..it's nothing to be upset about if you're not being cat called. It's not like it's good to be soley valued on your looks since they will fade. And cat callers are nothing but a blip in your life, so why do you care if you are or aren't cat called?

I bet you aren't ugly at all, but again it's hard to tell what goes through a cat callers mind when he chooses who to call at.

Mr_Smoogs · 2018-12-30T17:58:44+00:00

I’ve been catcalled a few times this in the past year while going for a run. It’s mostly from a certain demographic of women who were clearly on their way to the bars considering I was running at night.

Like that catcalling NYC video, it disproportionally comes from a certain demographic of people.

Zippo-Cat · 2018-12-30T17:17:45+00:00

Women who have been catcalled: were the men doing it alone at the time, or in a group?

SimulatedEnvironment · 2018-12-30T18:00:40+00:00

I agree. Stop giving women unsolicited attention as it’s harassment. If they want to be catcalled then they’ll give affirmative consent and make it known that they’d like to be catcalled.

a_vanillae · 2018-12-30T19:36:59+00:00

It happens. It's much less common than it used to be, probably because I am older and usually accompanied by husband and/or children. The problem is not the catcalling itself IMO, but the fact it's usually accompanied by aggressive body language and overtures. That's when I get spooked. If a guy wants to say "Damn, baby, you look good", I have no issue smiling, saying thanks, and continuing on my way. Politeness without any meaningful engagement. If they don't take the brush off well, it becomes a problem.

Thankfully I'm more likely to get compliments these days, if anything is said. I'm in a southeastern US urban area.

HectoSexual · 2018-12-30T19:41:21+00:00

You are a victim of feminist propaganda. Men these days almost never have the balls to approach a women to engage in regular conversation, let alone cat calls. What you are hearing about is scripted propaganda designed to justify violence towards men.

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nevomintoarce · 2018-12-30T22:21:33+00:00

I only get cat called when I pass construction workers or men in that class type thing area.

a-WaltzingMatilda · 2018-12-30T23:20:40+00:00

When I hear ‘catcalling’ I just picture a New York construction worker from an 80s movie that calls everyone bozo.

LeJacquelope · 2018-12-31T05:33:06+00:00

I don't catcall women. I never did. I always hated the idea of approaching women and giving them power over me, much less being a creep and yelling out to women and making an idiot of myself.

waxedmintfloss · 2018-12-31T08:10:57+00:00

I think it depends massively on where you live, what places and social environments you frequent, and your body language.

SirNemesis · 2018-12-31T18:44:35+00:00

Never catcalled anyone. I've ocassionally seen catcalls happen; maybe like once every year or so. I think it's the demographics that I tend to be around plus guys probably don't catcall as obviously when other guys are around.

Also, one time a guy late at night came up to me on the street and told me I was cute and offered me a bj. I told him I was straight but thanked him for the offer. That's the only time I've been catcalled, unfortunately.

[deleted] · 2019-01-08T22:05:02+00:00

I don’t really get cat called that much either tbh can’t really even think of a recent incidence. Maybe it’s because I don’t go out that much? Idk it’s not something I’ve ever thought about

SDW137 · 2018-12-30T16:57:04+00:00

It could just be by coincidence, or it could because of how you look. I don't know how you look so I can't say.

red__aaron · 2018-12-30T17:00:28+00:00

It probably depends on where you live. I live in the suburbs so I only get catcalled when running, and I honestly have no idea what they’re saying it’s just yelling.

If I didn’t run I don’t think I’d be catcalled though.

yasee · 2018-12-30T17:40:44+00:00

this does not happen often to me either (like I can probably count on 1 hand). tbf I'm on the plain side, but I think it's largely dependent on where you live

MGTOWtoday · 2018-12-30T20:17:34+00:00

It’s bullshit. I’ve never done it in my entire life, no guy I know has ever done it, and the only time I’ve ever witnessed it was when I was in Times Square and saw a drunk homeless guy say, “hot damn!” when an insanely hot hooker was walking down the street. The whole point of making cat calling a thing is that feminists want to take free speech rights away from men.

CamoWoobie10 · 2018-12-30T17:01:50+00:00

I have catcalled before. Yeah I'm sure the feminists are gunna have a field day on me, but I dont do it to make a girl feel good a lot of the times. If a girl looks cute young and innocent, she can get a compliment. Ex: "wow, you look amazing today" "You're so beautiful, have a good day". If she is dressed like a slut, I'm usually going to be mean and say it with the intent of degrading her/humiliating her/making her feel unsafe. Ex: "Hey baby, nice tits, fucking whore"

Shadow_Of_ · 2018-12-30T18:18:46+00:00

While I do think men shouldn't do it it's not that bad.

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2018-12-30T17:10:30+00:00

this has happened to me maybe once or twice in my entire

what do you look like?

NoGodsNoLabels · 2018-12-30T18:37:48+00:00

You have to be hot.

oftheinfinite · 2018-12-30T19:03:21+00:00

If I'm ever going to catcall, it's going to be at a very hot woman with bigger tits and ass and a non-existent waist and she has to be dressed provocatively and moving sexily. Same with my friends (who catcall). Funny thing is, the women my friends catcall are not butthurt about it and they kinda like it. But then again, my friends are conventionally attractive.

Title	About catcalling...
Author	muabirdie
Upvotes	32
Comments	222
Date	December 30, 2018 4:54 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/aaxgg8/about_catcalling/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/about-catcalling.258273 https://theredarchive.com/post/258273

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