You're not a "nice guy" You're a pussy and scared of rejection.

LarkCJ3a · 2020-08-14T05:25:02+00:00

Dude, thank you! This is the exact summary of all Pickup articles/book you read about game and how get girls. There is no secret formula, or secret pickup line... it’s simple...just get out and talk to women... you will get better with time. Done.

norwegiandoggo · 2020-08-14T05:50:59+00:00

Being scared of rejection doesn't mean you're a pussy. Everyone is scared of rejection to various degrees.

LarkCJ3a · 2020-08-14T05:42:49+00:00

Has nothing to do with this post but.. Yesterday I wanted to ask 2 Girls if they know a place where me and my bros can go eat and they just ignored me... some people are ridiculous bro hahah

NorthEast_Homestead · 2020-08-14T14:24:45+00:00

I feel like this is the case for alot of men. But I'm not too sure calling them a pussy will help build that confidence.

LarkCJ3a · 2020-08-14T08:58:17+00:00

nowadays I'm mostly scared of success. holding and entertaining a relationship has been a tiresome (yet awesome at times) task to perform; so I always think twice before an approach. When I really want to get to know the person things go naturally from there.

LarkCJ3a · 2020-08-14T06:57:21+00:00

Never tell her.

Elaborate, please. To me not being direct feels unnatural. This is why I'm interested in your take.

kristalle21 · 2020-08-14T12:31:49+00:00

As a woman, if you feel the need to tell me you’re a “nice guy” I will immediately see that as a red flag. A lion never needs to tell you he’s a lion...

maruthegreat · 2020-08-14T14:29:18+00:00

I've got ADHD and something called RSD (rejection sensitivity dysphoria). It sucks, any time that I have been rejected, I get very hard on myself, somewhat anxious, and very depressed. I've definitely struggled with fear of rejection since my mid/late teens; for some time I actually didn't date because I was too afraid to face rejection. Been in therapy for the past couple years now to help manage.

Artrock80 · 2020-08-14T11:25:57+00:00

Agreed. I've missed many chances with women I was interested in, that were briefly interested in me, but moved on because I hesitated or didn't make a move, even though I wanted to. Then when I did try, it was too late and the attraction had faded. Sucks but that's the reality.

SpicyAttom988 · 2020-08-14T13:04:21+00:00

Lol I dont wanna go against you but , look Im a girl and I keep rolling my eyes at this. Please dont fall for things like "POWER EYE CONTACT" or "CONFIDENCE OVER 9000" pleeeeeease make yourself a favor and dont try to follow a guideline that will just distract you and make you feel uncomfortable with yourself. I know it sounds fucking stupid but just try to put yourself on autopilot, love yourself, remember that ANY emotion and reaction you ever face is valid and you dont need to be ashamed for being shy or scared.

kreeation14 · 2020-08-14T13:42:45+00:00

Eyy man ive always thought of myself That way, ive been going through some shit but this just gave me confidence to change my attitude about myself and others

Tyanuh · 2020-08-14T12:40:54+00:00

Regarding point 3. It could definitely pay of if you just tell her point-blank, but it depends highly on the energy you give off in that moment. If she senses there's any kind of pleading involved you've killed it, but if you say it without being attached to the outcome it can work wonders.

The_Sir_Galahad · 2020-08-14T13:58:21+00:00

I think this post is an oversimplification of what a nice guy is, and from that aspect... disagree.

The number 1 issue nice guys face is toxic shame and how it relates to being abandoned.

pablinschen · 2020-08-14T14:52:24+00:00

These words speak knowledge. Ignoring little exceptions, I believe the game of approaching girls is this, no more no less. And everybody expect men to behave this way. I was a "nice" guy once, fully scared of rejection. I thought being rejected would break my emotionally self apart. Nevermore.

scarrax · 2020-08-14T14:54:13+00:00

Fragility is the number one reason why so many men fail with women. They are so afraid of being rejected that they avoid risking rejection, and they get mad and butthurt when they get rejected.

offtheplug436 · 2020-08-14T17:08:29+00:00

This is the single most important post of this thread. It's time to close the whole reddit sub

Fullsebas · 2020-08-14T17:53:14+00:00

I see someone as read the book "No more mr. nice guy "

mlb897 · 2020-08-14T12:56:37+00:00

Straight female here. I 100% agree with what you're saying. I also feel like I should share my experience with self proclaimed "nice guys." In my experience, the guys who always talk about how nice or genuine they are, tend to be the most bitter and entitled. It seems that they think they're owed something. They always talk about it, but don't show it.

If I see something like "I'm a nice guy" or "Just a genuine guy" or anything else along those lines on a dating app for example, I swipe left immediately.

A guy always talking about how nice he is is a huge red flag for me.

(Also on mobile, apologize if formatting is off)

LarkCJ3a · 2020-08-14T05:29:03+00:00

Practice makes perfect, the first several times flirting and approaching will be absolutely horrible, but you will make mistakes and learn.

gtrman571 · 2020-08-14T15:26:55+00:00

Why do people continue to believe that putting people down and insulting them is the correct way to motivate them?

2020-08-14T13:17:55+00:00

I think people mistake a nice guy as somebody who is respectful. You can be respectful, but not a nice guy.

Nice guy is really somebody who is just afraid of failing and hide under that guise.

Moldy_Gecko · 2020-08-14T14:14:51+00:00

Just to add to this. If you do play it cool upon rejection, you are more likely for her not to reject you in a future meeting. I used to always tell girls I'm not looking for anything serious and some would rebuff that. Then, I'd get a random call from them in the future asking me to come over.

funcoolshit · 2020-08-14T15:03:29+00:00

Ugh, it took me 34 years to figure this out. I wish I had the attitude and confidence about women and rejection that I do now back when I was in my 20's and in college. Better late than never I guess.

Solid advice. Take it to heart people, embrace rejection and let it strengthen you.

carlsberg24 · 2020-08-14T17:44:46+00:00

Some men actually are nice guys, but I agree that if a timid approach is made out of fear, then it's not really a good quality.

khaosten · 2020-08-14T18:04:54+00:00

I really don’t think I’m into a lot of girls who like bold guys, yeah I’d probably be happy with one, but the types of girls that I find perfect are the 6’3” doms who want a househusband.

Edit: I also like guys that way too, so I kinda have a type.

luxo117 · 2020-08-14T12:34:27+00:00

This is BS. I'm never scared of rejection, I expect it, and still I get the nice guy label.

2020-08-14T11:01:46+00:00

True

Goruto1334 · 2020-08-14T11:47:09+00:00

I’m fine with that. You can call me whatever you want, doesn’t hurt me at all. I just do me and whatever happens, happens.

2020-08-14T13:08:12+00:00

Sheeesshhhhh

Dominus-Prime- · 2020-08-14T13:42:31+00:00

Yes all of this put into action. I will disagree in that depending on the situation and the girl it can be perfectly fine to tell her with your words that you find her attractive. Usually only works when you know she’s into you though

w_franc_ · 2020-08-14T14:34:24+00:00

Agreed broo! :)

vitamin-cheese · 2020-08-14T15:24:02+00:00

There’s also being nice becuase you don’t want to come across as a perve or an asshole, or be a sexual harasser, the guy so many girls claim to hate even though those are the ones that seek to get the most . It’s not always so much fear of rejection but rejection from a societal standpoint as well

Geomaster53 · 2020-08-14T15:30:14+00:00

“Man up” wow that helps alot

EthanWaberx · 2020-08-14T18:04:39+00:00

People aren't so much afraid of rejection. ( When you think about it we basically live in an era of rejection)

More so the issue is that women have made a sport out of publicly humiliating men who they don't think are suitable mates.

arshadyr · 2020-08-14T19:11:34+00:00

How do I learn to make eye contact in a good way?

XGhosterHD · 2020-08-14T19:14:33+00:00

I mean being a nice guy to others it’s ok sometimes there is no need to be an asshole as you say, for example I consider myself a nice guy because I help my close friends as much as I can, I always try to help people without them abusing of me. But when it comes to talking to the girl I’m into right now, I make her jokes, I tease, I make strong eye contact, and she likes it we have a really nice vibe. But an extra that helped me get closer to her faster was my reputation, whenever we go out in a group everyone is talking me up because I have a good reputation with others, which can increase her interest in me, if everyone talks you up she will be more interested in you, she will be with the best guy in the group always, the leader somehow, if everyone likes you and trusts you you start being a leader. This is just my personal opinion from my own experience, if you think I’m wrong I would happily hear your opinion.

throwawaygang21 · 2020-08-14T21:18:41+00:00

Finally a quality post on this sub, these are the kinds of posts I wanna see. Can we clean this shit up. I'm so tired of reading "How do I get my crush of 6 years to text me back?" and "Should I stand at a 45 degree angle when talking to girls?".

The focus should be on improving yourself, being a better man, being a better person, being secure with yourself, and then putting yourself out there to add value to the world so that people want to be around you. Thanks for this post, this is what guys need to hear.

BrexFlexx · 2020-08-14T21:20:30+00:00

Amen brother

Unslev · 2020-08-14T22:40:00+00:00

I've been trying these sorts of things for years now and couldn't figure out why I wasn't getting anywhere, finally figured out that the fake confidence I put on around woman does not make me happy, it always feels like I'm lieing to them, it's not my true self....

pointlemiserables · 2020-08-14T22:49:19+00:00

2020-08-14T23:17:52+00:00

Saw the title, knew he's spitting truth.

hoeslikeacash · 2020-08-15T00:21:43+00:00

absolutelly true homie everything else its just fucking EXCUSE !

Hanzo_K · 2020-08-15T01:40:19+00:00

Amen... I had older brother figures help me get over that shy and bashful approach, helped instill confidence in me. I get turned down sometimes , but it’s not the end of the world. Just move on...

_Fragulater_ · 2020-08-15T01:47:00+00:00

I've seen this book in this sub several times and I swear by it. "No more Mr. Nice Guy" I'm only half way done. Best book so far!

2020-08-15T04:12:21+00:00

No More Me Nice Guy, by Robert Glover.

hanniebunches · 2020-08-15T04:41:38+00:00

i would be so sad if someone didnt say they thought i was pretty/STATED that they were attracted to me :((

2020-08-15T05:10:52+00:00

a-fucking-men

ThievinAldreth · 2020-08-15T06:27:21+00:00

Why not just eliminate the criticism you've gotten and also get your message across using this means for communicating it:

"Hey, I just read 'No More Mr. Nice Guy' and I feel pretty strongly after reading the book and practicing some of the methods in it that it really works! The author really know what he's talking about".

Then you don't confuse everyone by coming on here, adding a lot of "bro" and "shoot your shot" to the overarching theme of the author's work, and throwing the "nice guy" term in without the reader having been briefed on the meaning of the term in he chapter titled "Who's a Nice Guy".

In that scenario, everything gets covered thorughly and the author retains credit, and you don't come off like a cocky life coach with a slightly "bruh" vibe coming on here preaching when none of us has any prior experience with you to inspire any credibility.

We would be much more likely to believe the author of the book about all this information, who like you, we have a lack of personal previous experience upon which to engender said credibilit because he literally wrote the book on it, and didn't shove a 1 1/2 page Spark Notes summary of this information toward an audience that implicitly struggles with fear of rejection and a lack of approval while simultaneously calling people "pussies".

Sometimes telling is better than showing. Especially when you may send unintended signals to folks because you lack a certain sense of social context sometimes.

I hate to jump in here 2 liters deep on some Hateorade but honestly this entire subreddit would do a lot more for a lot more people if the culture of shaming folks who aren't entirely gung-ho to ",shoot their shot" the minute you tell them they aren't "being a man" if they don't immediately banish all anxiety and start " living their best life" and just "get over rejection" wasn't being demonstrated by half the folks who come here with a success story to an audience that obviously struggles with those very items - or they wouldn't be in this subreddit to begin with.

I should take my own advice and rethink the best way to solve this issue effectively....

So come check out the new subreddit /drowninginoussybro and post all your success stories!

willgo-waggins · 2020-08-14T14:06:05+00:00

This is the bullshit that fuels rape culture.

LarkCJ3a · 2020-08-14T09:19:29+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Bvllvj · 2020-08-14T12:34:51+00:00

whats your body count

2020-08-14T13:40:55+00:00

Boooooom! This post 👌

2020-08-14T16:29:31+00:00

I deal with this a lot. They want to be friends, then ask for nudes. I say no, then they block me. I tell guys this, they always say the cliche “I’m not like other guys”. Then do the EXACT. SAME. THING.

This isn’t a generalization just a story of some guys I run into.

speedstermodi · 2020-08-14T16:38:52+00:00

Dude, what's kino?

LarkCJ3a · 2020-08-14T13:36:39+00:00

Does being a nice guy mean you are confident enough to approach women? I consider myself a nice guy, and I'm able to approach women and accept rejection without feeling bitter. I don't think that nice guys are pussies.

Xazax310 · 2020-08-14T13:59:48+00:00

True, I'd like to point out as well as I've seen on this sub "1 year cold approach challenge" is absolutely stupid. While talking to random girls does help improve your ability to talk, it's about the quality of the interaction... not that your approaching 5 different girls every day for 1 year.

Also, I think there's not wrong with letting her know you're attracted to her. "Hey, your cute, I liked/want to get to know you" as long as your body language, and like you said eye contact shows it, it's very direct.

I think the problem comes many guys go for compliments right off the start before getting to know the girl. I've done this, with a girl that showed interested in me(staring me down), needless to say, I lost that interest when I approached, talked to her and called her "beautiful".

dambachern · 2020-08-14T15:36:16+00:00

“You’re alright” lol

EarthWarping · 2020-08-14T16:14:45+00:00

Seriously.

Masol_The_Producer · 2020-08-14T17:17:59+00:00

I’m very smart and i can come up wit a plan to impress anyone

Toraradora · 2020-08-14T18:52:56+00:00

You must know my husband!

qnaasty · 2020-08-14T19:04:01+00:00

Lol okay dude. Thats youre paradigm of my thoughts. Aint nothing I can do about it.

2020-08-14T19:22:35+00:00

Isn't that like obvious?

britney_11 · 2020-08-14T19:31:31+00:00

Why I see so many guys confusing being confident and strong with acting without interest ? Why they confuse flirting with sarcasm too? " you are alright" , " act like this happens all the time"... this will make you sound arrogant and that's all.

djorphix · 2020-08-14T21:08:00+00:00

“Never tell her” .

I always tell them

Pissed_Misanthopist · 2020-08-14T21:20:27+00:00

I’m emotionally fucked enough to the point where I simply don’t want to ask out girls I don’t know. Am I scared of rejection? Yes. I’ve been rejected way too many times. It’s not worth going through more pain. Guys have feelings too. If that makes me a pussy then cool I guess.

tejassuthar777 · 2020-08-14T23:22:36+00:00

Look eyebrows if you are not sure to look into eyes. Whatever works for u and doesn't creep her out will work. There is no single way for all people. Do what works for u. I am confident to look into eyes naturally. But u can try that way

Gaffa_futi · 2020-08-15T02:25:00+00:00

Learning to talk to women is easy, you can learn in several hours. Talking to them is what takes longer!!!

being told no, in general, is a good start. Try applying for jobs you are not qualified for. It's a good exercise lol

ialarabi · 2020-08-15T04:18:35+00:00

You don't have to be mean or an a**hole. You just have to be Chad.

lemueldon · 2020-08-15T04:22:51+00:00

I'm all that! I'm confident and able to attract women by simply staring at her. And guess what, i did not learn that skills from other guys, i learned it from a woman!

Soundnipple · 2020-08-15T18:16:50+00:00

Or be like me and don’t even worry about it. If they come to papi they will come to papi. It’s worked so far and I’ve had to deal with 0 shit

Annalise954 · 2020-08-15T21:16:34+00:00

I like nice guys

va9393 · 2020-08-18T05:03:53+00:00

Desperate lol not at all

aladraka314 · 2020-08-14T13:06:07+00:00

This whole post is gold 🙌

njugiste · 2020-08-14T17:49:31+00:00

Everyone who is afraid of rejection is a pussy, including women.

Rejection sucks and downplaying it or anyone who won't risk it even for you stranger, is going too low.

Gloomy-Jicama · 2020-08-14T17:57:15+00:00

Why is this forum full of a bunch of weirdo stuff. Just fucking ask girls out that you want to ask out. There are no other prequisites or rules. If you didnt ask the girl you wanted to ask out its because you have some anxiety issues... which is fine. The cure to that is simply pushing yourself to ask out another girl you want to ask out.

There is no need for any of these weird concepts. A lot of this over-analysis is the reason why guys have problems in this arena.

GEEZUS00 · 2020-08-14T18:01:56+00:00

I don’t know man. Women have changed and stuff like this won’t really work.

Scared-Psychology · 2020-08-14T06:59:13+00:00

You are scared of her saying no because that will be a personal attack on your looks/character. Grow up. It isn't.

Actually, Yes, it probably is. Why else would she say no?

BonvivantNamedDom · 2020-08-14T05:45:56+00:00

hold phone to her "you know your number from the top of your head?" works better than anything else.

But I can tell by your platitudes that you have a lot of book knowledge and just repeat things youve read elsewhere.

xsurus · 2020-08-14T13:53:32+00:00

What is kino?

77tuoemtae · 2020-08-14T22:37:16+00:00

Haha did u get rejected mate? Anyone with a post like this either was rejected or never been looked at. Its life. Some are ugly asf and some well......they just lucky they arent ugly or down right low in the self esteem.

bizzy511 · 2020-08-15T01:37:58+00:00

I see people here talking about kino a lot. Is it an acronym for something? What is an example of kino?

Abbotties · 2020-08-15T23:12:23+00:00

r/HotPussyPics/

Title	You're not a "nice guy" You're a pussy and scared of rejection.
Author	LarkCJ3a
Upvotes	1835
Comments	274
Date	August 14, 2020 5:16 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/i9g1as/youre_not_a_nice_guy_youre_a_pussy_and_scared_of/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/youre-not-a-nice-guy-youre-a-pussy-and-scared-of.1500400 https://theredarchive.com/post/1500400

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