CMV: Males avoiding women at work are sexist

Alarming_Ask_244 · 2025-01-17T15:17:35+00:00

It's sexist to treat one sex differently than the other out of fear.

Okay, women first

Logos1789 · 2025-01-17T15:22:20+00:00

Job security = money = male employee is able to live safely/take care of himself

Non-work related and/or private interactions with female coworkers = potential threat to job security and professional reputation

Women’s prejudicial treatment of men on the basis of fear is supported by most people.

Even though women typically fear a more immediate threat than losing their job, you can’t defend their prejudicial treatment of men and simultaneously condemn similar treatment when the genders are reversed.

Embarrassed-Tune9038 · 2025-01-17T15:27:32+00:00

Better sexist than unemployed.

Dry-Ad3452 · 2025-01-17T15:29:12+00:00

It's sexist to treat one sex differently than the other out of fear.

Women treat men differently due to fear every damn day. This is a self-own.

meisterkraus · 2025-01-17T16:25:12+00:00

Remember everyone it is only sexist when men do it.

GYN-k4H-Q3z-75B · 2025-01-17T15:29:20+00:00

It's sexist to treat one sex differently than the other out of fear

Okay. Women are way more afraid of men (with statistically significant evidence justifying it) and are treating them very differently because of it. Are you, as a woman, saying that is sexist? You did not think this through.

Environmental_Day558 · 2025-01-17T15:24:32+00:00

It's sexist to treat one sex differently than the other out of fear.

I've seen this play out being in the military. Women being treated like one of the guys and it's all good until someone says something that she deems over the line and now the 1st Sgt coming in to talk to everyone. As a result men watch what they say and change conversations when women are around to avoid that happening. It's like damn if you do, damn if you dont.

Shit like, "Would you rather be alone in the office with a woman or a bear?" That shit is not funny

Didn't women start the whole bear man woods thing? It's not fun when then the rabbit has the gun is it...

It's literally hurting women's careers, having a long lasting effect on women's careers.

Explain how? Here is a quote from the article of one woman surveyed. “Men and women are not talking to each other. The environment is becoming sterile and completely unenjoyable to work in”. That's what this is about. Women feeling left out of the banter men are having and are bored as a result, which is a consequence of them complaining about it.

If I had to choose between being sexist in your eyes or being in trouble, I'm picking being sexist.

MaxDureza · 2025-01-17T15:32:36+00:00

If women treat men differently than women you realize that would mean women are being sexist too? #weekly braindead windmill post

Illustrious-Baker775 · 2025-01-17T15:47:51+00:00

What is our definition of sexist here? Because this headline also implies that women avoiding men in society are also sexist, when we can agree that both of these things are happening because of the well known risks of interacting with the opposite gender.

Its really funny you mention a "would you rather be stuck in an office with a woman or a bear" argument when thats an obvious parody of the man or bear in the woods argument. Im glad you see that as sexist, but would appreciate re-targetting the attack towards the actual writters of that dumb joke.

Intrepid_University6 · 2025-01-17T15:29:16+00:00

Protecting yourself from a potential predator is never sexist.

Tywinlol2 · 2025-01-17T16:36:15+00:00

Men should prioritize their own well being, financial safety, reputation and peace of mind. If they have to avoid females at work in order to accomplish that then so be it. And if it is hurting females career or is deemed sexist by our misandrist society then let me get world's smallest violin. We owe nothing to those who exploit us and discriminate against us.

RapaxIII · 2025-01-17T15:20:33+00:00

If men are able to attack innocent women at any moment, what's wrong with us removing ourselves from the equation

HTML_Novice · 2025-01-17T15:20:44+00:00

I avoid women at work, I ain’t catching no false accusations or anything of the sort. Sexist? How about, not fired

Windmill_flowers · 2025-01-17T15:16:19+00:00

All the women i talk to irl are at work. Theres some women i straight up dont talk to because their beauty does intimidate me but i also realize i have no reason to actually talk to them so does that make me a sexist?

EryNameWasTaken · 2025-01-17T15:41:21+00:00

"the number of male managers who are uncomfortable mentoring women has more than tripled"

In the past, many men took advantage of high status positions to gain sex from their female colleagues under the guise of "mentorship". Some women played into this game and leveraged it to their own benefit, while others refused and were left behind or were sexually harassed. It was a bad system that was addressed with the #metoo movement.

The #metoo movement empowered women, but it came at a heavy cost. When careers can be ruined from a mere accusation, it puts men in an extremely vulnerable position.

What we are seeing today is men merely protecting themselves by avoiding situations where they could be viewed as having an inappropriate relationship with a female colleague.

Many men, myself included, would be hesitant to even be in a room alone with a female colleague who they didn't trust 110%. I am also careful about the language I use and the jokes I make. Whereas with a male colleague I might feel more "myself" and let the guardrails down a bit, leading to a higher chance of a fruitful bond forming.

Many sexual assault accusations are nearly impossible to prove and boil down to one person's word against someone else's. Therefore, its impossible to determine how many false accusations have resulted in someone losing their career, but the fear is very real.

Is it harder to mentor someone who you can't be alone with? Absolutely. Does this situation lead to less opportunities for women? Almost certainly, and that is extremely unfortunate. But the alternative is asking men to put themselves in potentially compromising situations, and that is impossible to ask under the current political climate where sexual misconduct allegations, whether true or false, result in a man's career being permanently scarred or altogether lost.

Tokimonatakanimekat · 2025-01-17T15:42:04+00:00

Me vs women at work

Think-Signature6953 · 2025-01-17T15:24:30+00:00

I don't avoid women per say when working with them. My manager is a woman, and I have a lot of respect for her and her skills. I never look at a woman and her output as less simply because she is a woman. If you do the work I don't care about your sex.

However, in my experience, I have often had more issues working with women than men, it has made me avoid women to a certain degree. Women are prone to spread rumors and gossip, take things rather personal and be passive aggressive.

Work is work, it is the basis of how I can live my life. I rather not add unnecessary risk that can jeopardize that.

I work with them, but keep our relationship very cordial, I prefer not to share personal details with them (from experience).

Naturally, the reasons for my avoidance has also been displayed by men in my life but I see those men as weak so I avoid them as well.

MisterFunnyShoes · 2025-01-17T16:41:04+00:00

It’s sexist to treat one sex differently than the other out of fear.

loooooooool

No You!

Windmill_flowers · 2025-01-17T17:30:24+00:00

ok? is this supposed to be some sort of gotcha? I literally dont care if you call me sexist because i dont wanna deal with women.

SnoopyDru · 2025-01-17T19:00:28+00:00

Is a small female manager in the wrong if she doesn’t want to be in the office alone with the door shut with a bigger man? You better say that she’s being sexist against men.

No_Curve6292 · 2025-01-18T01:26:06+00:00

I avoid my women coworkers because one slip up and you are labeled a creep. Doesn’t matter if you aren’t interested in them at all or anything. Say one wrong thing, give one wrong look, and boom, you are a creep. So I only interact with them when it’s necessary.

Hunder_YT · 2025-01-17T15:30:57+00:00

They need to make one call to HR, and complain about something that doesn't not even be true and the man loses his job.

Podlubnyi · 2025-01-17T17:35:41+00:00

Males gotta protect themselves, and to hell with any females whose feelings get hurt as a result. If you have a problem with that, then take it up with the feminists who brought us here.

VojakOne · 2025-01-17T19:52:00+00:00

I'll take the bait lol -

Since #MeToo, most businesses have cracked down on men in positions of leadership. All it takes is the assumption that there's inappropriate communication/contact occurring and a man's career is over. Due to the inherent risk, some men have chosen to nip the problem in the bud altogether.

It's better to not mentor, or be in any 1-1 scenario with a female colleague, than it is to risk a false allegation being made that ends their career.

I wouldn't say that this is sexist, because sexism implies malicious intent. Self-preservation isn't malicious, imo.

2025-01-18T08:12:46+00:00

You don't feel

entitled

to mentorship and connections, do you? Newsflash: men don't owe you career advancement.

FrodoCraggins · 2025-01-17T15:29:27+00:00

I'd like to hear your thoughts on male coaches mentoring female athletes, OP. Is it sexist if the athlete or her parents are leery of a male coach after all the news in recent years? Can you understand why men at work would be unwilling to risk being seen in that light?

Efficient-Baker1694 · 2025-01-17T16:22:55+00:00

I don’t know if it’s fear but more so of being overly cautious along with a take no chance attitude to go along with it. Cause let’s face it, nobody wants to suddenly lose their job over being accused of something they did/didn’t do. Of course if they did it and the offense of it is on the grounds of termination, then they deserve to lose it. But it’s different if they lose it for something they didn’t do and therefore aren’t taking any chances. As the article said, it’s unattended consequence of the MeToo movement.

Do you think this is something that the respective company needs to fix/train with? I think terminating is on the extreme end just for not taking to women at work.

John_Oakman · 2025-01-17T16:34:59+00:00

What reasonable mechanisms are in place to protect innocent males from false accusations? (especially in the court of public opinion as the usual legal protections tend to not applicable)

If even the topic of protective mechanisms are anathema to the concept of genuine moral virtues being wholly independent of worldly results then you're seeing the the material consequences of misogynists outcompeting the non-misogynists.

Late_Notice02 · 2025-01-17T18:17:08+00:00

I think it's a bit of a stretch to claim that anyone avoiding women at work is inherently sexist. I think there's certain situations which aren't sexist.

Would you argue that it's sexist to avoid a woman that you're attracted to? I've seen a few men and women avoid working directly with people they have feelings for.

I actually just turned down a job offer the other day because I was insanely attracted to the woman who would have become my boss. I felt like it would have created a weird work environment for me and I didn't know if I could keep it 100% professional around her, she made me blush like crazy.

Was turning down that job sexist?

growframe · 2025-01-17T18:35:27+00:00

Your article doesn't describe any of this avoiding. It just talks about guys being nervous about coming off wrong.

Why should female coworkers be entitled to anything other than standard respect and professionalism?

AlecMercer · 2025-01-17T22:12:19+00:00

Men stop interacting with women at work unless work related or for teamwork means less women will be sexual harassed.

Less managers doing one on one interviews and/or mentorships unless HR, one or more people are present mean less abuse of power used on women at work.

Locking women out of work related opportunities? If you feel your job doesn't treat and/or pay you well then look for a new better job and quit when you find one. That way you don't have to deal with it.

lord-moo · 2025-01-17T22:16:28+00:00

me2,me2,me2, something something,me2,me2,something, oh yeah and me2

AlmostKindaGreat · 2025-01-17T23:57:38+00:00

If your conclusion after reading the article is that men are sexist for being afraid to interact with women then you've completely misinterpreted what the author is saying.

We get why men are nervous. “We talk about what are wrong behaviors, but we never as a country, as a culture, talk about what the right behaviors are,” says Reeves. “Imagine if someone watched you eat for week, and pointed out all the stuff that was unhealthy, but never thought to tell you about what was healthy. You’d be nervous every time you picked up a fork.”
[...]

It’s the good guys who are understandably nervous — and we appreciate why you’re uncomfortable in this brave new world of office politics. But please continue braving those nerves to talk with us, meet with us, and mentor us — just as you would male colleagues. We need to work together more now than ever.

She is expressing that she understands why men are nervous and hesitant to interact with women. She is acknowledging that this is understandable and not malicious, yet it can have unintended negative consequences for women. She is trying to build bridges here, rather than just lobbing more "Sexist!" accusations at men and alienating them even more.

Good for her. The article is great.

RapaxIII · 2025-01-17T15:12:59+00:00

If you avoid certain people at the office for non-bigoted reasons, is that bigotry?

2025-01-17T15:27:59+00:00

What about a man trying to avoid a woman who are bringing cameras in the gym recording tiktok videos so that they can file false accusations for staring at them while they just minding their own business or just happened to look at their camera and the women accidentally without staring them? And another women who got helped after failed to lift bench press or saving them from any accidents but instead they accuse us for sexually harassed them or looking at them as weak?

I don't call that sexist to do such thing, I call that saving our ass up from troubles.

HOLYREGIME · 2025-01-17T18:56:31+00:00

I would avoid them too as a middle manager especially if it involves mentoring- usually a younger woman.

Middle managers have some of the cushiest positions in corporate. They just tell other people what to do and report that up the ranks. A managers job is to babysit and play telephone. With this, that last makes them expendable during economic weakness. Progressive organizations are looking to flatten their organization.

With that being said they make good money while doing very little comparatively. They have a low tolerance for risk and won’t jeopardize that by saying the wrong thing to some naive LGBTQ woman looking to get offended.

Gold_Supermarket1956 · 2025-01-17T17:12:30+00:00

May i present to you the man vs the bear thing that was literally about yall having an irrational fear about men, yet when men avoid interactions with women in the workplace to avoid yall taking something said the wrong way it sexism?

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wtknight · 2025-01-17T16:46:49+00:00

[permanently deleted]

iPrefer2BAnon · 2025-03-26T04:09:38+00:00

I don’t think it’s sexist in the slightest that’s like saying it’s sexist that every woman should be wary of every man out of fear of being attacked, in reality most men aren’t going to just casually assault women, with the way the world has changed there would be almost no men left IF that was the case, HOWEVER women have high potential to be vindictive, I mean hell as a sex they can’t even support their own self without some amount of fakeness I can’t tell how many women I’ve talked to who is like, I have no woman friends because xyz reasons and it’s always the same old bs, the fakeness, the drama, etc, men don’t say this stuff about each other, sure SOME men do say these things, but the majority of men are loyal to each other to an extent, even the weirdest guy gets accepted by most men, they may not hang out with him but somewhere deep down if that guy needs help they would help him.

Women wouldn’t do that at all, look at statistics women are just not loyal in any stretch of the means, very few at least, that is why men avoid women in the workplace I certainly know I do, not all women, particularly older women are cool, and I’ll shoot the shit with lesbians and stuff but any straight woman I’m incredibly wary of being around, I’ve had too many bad experiences with heterosexual women at work too the point I would rather not deal with(drama for the most part, nothing harassment related)if that makes women mad who gives a shit, a lot of women caused the landscape that we see going before us and then they wanna act surprised when men avoid or just downright don’t take women seriously, how can we? No loyalty, and always coming from some place of emotion instead of some place that’s logical.

2025-03-26T23:27:32+00:00

I'm a peaceful passive misanthrope, but it's funny to observe how reactive and insecure people are when they project their perceptions on me/assume why I don't engage with them.

Tiny-Way320 · 2025-04-03T21:33:16+00:00

Man I must work in bizzaro world or something. I sat at the office with the chick from HR during lunch break and she was telling me how her breasts are lopsided and she wants to get a reduction after she drops some more weight. I told her not to. She kept asking me why she shouldn't but I honestly didn't want to say why so I kept avoiding the question. It never blew up into some crazy drama .

Artistic_Speech_1965 · 2025-01-18T01:46:00+00:00

Yes it's sexist but I don't understand how it's hurting women's career. Could you be more specific ?

Also I don't think one can help those men to stop fearing women in office until they make the decision to change their perspective. Also there are still men who don't avoid women in office

LillthOfBabylon · 2025-01-17T17:25:02+00:00

Honestly if those guys cant treat women like people and cant figure out how to not be put in a position to get reported, let him avoid women.

From the article: "the number of male managers who are uncomfortable mentoring women has more than tripled"

Honestly, if they want to risk a discrimination lawsuit, that’s on them.

abaxeron · 2025-01-17T17:20:45+00:00

Females don't belong in men's workplaces in the first place. The purpose of forcing men to work with females was to disrupt men's networking. It's been 60 years. Networking is already disrupted enough. Leave us alone.

No-Rough-7390 · 2025-01-18T00:02:05+00:00

I work in a field dominated by women. At my place of employment, I’m one of maybe 10 guys. There’s likely 8-10 times as many women.

In my over a decade there, I can maybe count 10 women (this takes turnover into account) who were truly competent at their job and knew what they were doing, could take feedback, strove to improve. The rest make the job harder for everyone they interact with.

Therefore, I don’t go out of my way to interact with them. I’ve tried, and other than the outliers I’ve cited it’s always an emotional shitshow or made extra work for me to show them letter by letter what to do.

Title	CMV: Males avoiding women at work are sexist
Author	Windmill_flowers
Upvotes	0
Comments	125
Date	January 17, 2025 3:10 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1i3igm3/cmv_males_avoiding_women_at_work_are_sexist/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/cmv-males-avoiding-women-at-work-are-sexist.1541386 https://theredarchive.com/post/1541386

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