Guy Shows A Provider Mentality. Some Women are Like "Yes, DO It!" Other Comments Show a PickMe Deprived Mentality - Ladies, Learn to Embrace Being Spoiled

catlady4u · 2021-09-26T16:08:58+00:00

Crap, my mentality was just like this. I would feel guilty and undeserving when a man spent money on me.

I haven't dated at all since I found FDS, so this will be good practice for the future.

donttextme_k · 2021-09-26T15:56:22+00:00

If a man wants to give you his money so you can spend it, let him! He enjoys the provider mentality. If you’re not the type to splurge, use it to buy stocks and invest it 😂

ello-motto · 2021-09-26T15:59:11+00:00

"I just want real love, not cash."

... Like the two are mutually exclusive?

Sis, you can have both. Stop placing the bar in hell.

thepsychopathhunter · 2021-09-26T15:43:53+00:00

Now if the women commenting were like, "I'd prefer gifts from you instead" because she wants something personally tailored to her, that argument would be perfectly understandable. But the comments under this video talking about how, "But I would just spend it on you!!!" and "I only need LOVE" irked me. It signals a pickme mentality where a woman is competing to show how generous she is to men and how she deprives herself. These women think they are "cooler" by refusing to accept generosity of any kind while usually tolerating a toxic relationship. The guy kept responding to these comments like, "um what? you can have love AND money" lol even he gets it. Meanwhile, other women who embrace being spoiled and know they have every right to be spoiled in a patriarchal society that oppresses them were just like, "Yes, do it." LOL. Embrace the generosity of men who want to provide for you if you find yourself still stuck in this mentality. Remember all the things women are subjected to in a patriarchial society and how they are constantly exploited and demeaned by low value men in hookup culture and how they are used for sex and devalued/discarded and treated horribly. You have every right to find a man who wants to provide for you genuinely and for no ulterior motive. And yes, you can be independent/financially successful and still be provided for by a high value man that loves you. They're not mutually exclusive.

lolmemberberries · 2021-09-26T17:05:37+00:00

They act like it's an either or, when there are men who can provide both. Stop settling.

pitiful_cherry · 2021-09-26T17:03:57+00:00

What’s the limit? 😏

povofme · 2021-09-26T17:04:43+00:00

What’s this idea that only love or money can exist? Why not have both? Damn

xfelugirlx · 2021-09-26T18:22:29+00:00

Girl i- i used to think like this but no anymore is pathetic, why feel guilty just for a present? If he wants to do it, i let him and just say thanks. This guy that is a friend bought me more meaningful things than my ex ever did, things that i really use and enjoy (makeup,skincare) gifts for ME not thinking sbout him, this dude uses to buy me chocolate and candy when i eat little portions (he eated more than i eat “my gifts” 🤡), i gave it all the leftovers to my sister. Also i agree what some comments are saying, they have advantages and some many women are still in the pickme phase just accepting the bare minimum, so enjoy. Do it for them too.

Novemberinthechair · 2021-09-26T21:23:18+00:00

"I don't know how to buy things for myself."

Oh, fuck off.

povofme · 2021-09-26T17:12:33+00:00

What’s his TikTok?

Astral_weaver · 2021-09-26T19:10:26+00:00

Pickmes are so sad.

When a person willfully gives you something you just take and enjoy it.

avocadobarbie · 2021-09-26T19:55:14+00:00

I don’t need you to do anything for me!! Pick me! I only require attention and brownies! So quirky and cool. I hate it here lol

preppykat3 · 2021-09-26T20:20:59+00:00

God those women are pathetic. It’s obvious that they’ve been brainwashed by society to accept breadcrumbs and feel ashamed of being spoiled. It’s so sad...

cml678701 · 2021-09-26T21:22:23+00:00

I hate when I see things on dating subreddits like, “this new guy I just met paid for both of our first two dates. They were to Olive Garden, which is such a nice restaurant. I feel so guilty about taking his money!!! How can I make it up to him??” The bar is in hell. I’m so glad I grew up with a provider dad who taught me to expect a man to do the same.

Noemie_Mathilde · 2021-09-27T02:34:46+00:00

I think some women are scared that it's a sugar daddy mentality and he will expect devotion and a doormat in return. Accept money and gifts, but keep vetting character ladies!

Horror_Maize_6546 · 2021-09-26T20:13:53+00:00

So he's hot and rich and them be like "but I want love". Okay fine can I have him then?

inlovewithaloser · 2021-09-27T05:29:03+00:00

The one that’s like, “I don’t know how to buy things for myself”... Nobody should know what you want better than your own self.

lilac-hiraeth · 2021-09-26T17:42:47+00:00

I have actually had a partner like this. Sent money whenever I wanted no questions asked. It was pretty sweet. He obviously had other red flags (mainly “dating” me in an open marriage and also being long distance) but this was pre FDS, and I was in my open marriage so it was more a playful time sink than a real relationship. I was getting spoiled. Nails, make up, tattoos, shoes, piercings, regularly. He still pays my cell phone bill even though we don’t chat (much) anymore (he’s long distance in another country and mostly just sends money randomly with next to no input from me, so he stays for now). 🤷‍♀️ More than my stbx husband ever gave me.

We are friends on Facebook and I was asking what kind of computer stuff I should get my kid since some component of his computer broke and I’m not tech savvy. He messaged me and said “I priced out with exchange and shipping what your son needs. This is what I recommend, this is where you can find it, check your PayPal, the money is there.” Umm, yep, will do. My son was super excited with his upgrades.

Anyway, definitely want that kind of energy in my next serious relationship when/if it happens.

Determinedblonde · 2021-09-26T21:24:12+00:00

What about the non-pickmes? Tbh there’s something about a man’s generosity that is a turn on 🥰

Vmchik · 2021-09-26T21:04:15+00:00

Saving this to manifest✨🙏🏾

waddamelone · 2021-09-27T05:56:51+00:00

As he should. Period.

eveloe · 2021-09-28T00:59:07+00:00

Hot, generous men are my favourite.

Life is just A+ when you know you’re going to come every time you have sex, and the peace you get from knowing someone will have your back - no matter what - is unparalleled.

Hot, generous men are my kink, and if my relationship with my current one were to end, I’d need someone else on that level. I’ve been spoiled now, and I’m never going back.

Equal-Ear2312 · 2021-09-27T10:10:26+00:00

Pickmes: ruining it for other women since forever. 🤮

DivineGoddess1111111 · 2021-09-27T03:37:42+00:00

Calling me "baby girl" would have me throwing his card in his face. YUCK 🤮

purasangria · 2021-09-26T18:34:09+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Noemie_Mathilde · 2021-09-27T02:34:46+00:00

I think some women are scared that it's a sugar daddy mentality and he will expect devotion and a doormat in return. Accept money and gifts, but keep vetting character ladies!

Title	Guy Shows A Provider Mentality. Some Women are Like "Yes, DO It!" Other Comments Show a PickMe Deprived Mentality - Ladies, Learn to Embrace Being Spoiled
Author	thepsychopathhunter
Upvotes	399
Comments	54
Date	September 26, 2021 3:39 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/pvw94b/guy_shows_a_provider_mentality_some_women_are/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/guy-shows-a-provider-mentality-some-women-are-like.1074173 https://theredarchive.com/post/1074173