I don’t know how and I don’t know for how long he has been looking for me. I was off social media for over a year, decided too open it again and next thing you know, I see a friend request and it’s him. He has a bunch of videos of him on public being fit, really into health now and still with his new girlfriend (He moved on to a new relationship 5 months after we broke up, we were long term) he looked so happy. The moment I saw, my body went into full panic mode. I couldn’t stop shaking and I felt like I was going to faint. He cheated on me, he was emotionally abusive to me for years, I begged for the bare minimum and I barely got that…..and he gets to be this happy…..? How can he suddenly get into a new relationship, still be in it and have a 360 change while I’m so scared to even get into one after a year and a half and still healing from past traumas? I’m starting to feel like I was the main reason why the relationship fell apart.

EDIT: Wow I did not expect this much support from all of you. I felt as if I was receiving endless of hugs from my sisters. Thank you for being there when I felt the most loneliest and vulnerable. I know we don't know each other in person but I feel that I have finally found what true sisterhood is.

UPDATE: One of my social media has my old phone number linked to the account I’m using and I’m assuming he still has me as his contacts with that number or he really did a scavenger hunt but regardless, I have officially blocked him.

UPDATE #2: saw him eating at a fast food restaurant, he left the moment he saw me. Couldn’t even confront me. Also found out he still has my old phone number in his contacts and that’s how he found me one of my socials.