When you see it..

JoanHollowayWannabe · 2021-08-27T20:17:57+00:00

Wow it's a whole Friday afternoon and FDS chose violence because I feel personally attacked lol

Radiant_Brain_9822 · 2021-08-27T18:00:33+00:00

If you love someone, set them free; if they come back, they couldn’t find anyone else to put up with their shit.

ComprehensiveAmoeba9 · 2021-08-27T18:11:16+00:00

Exactly why I block and delete. Most of them get the message they no longer have access to me, they don’t deserve the satisfaction that I saw their name popup on the screen. I had a couple weirdos make new accounts just to bother me again but they finally gave up when I still ignored them.

Edit: All my exes I didn’t block in the past came back, whether it was randomly messaging me asking how I’ve been or asking straight up if I want to get back together with them

modemarkt · 2021-08-27T20:23:26+00:00

So many things I have to say about this.

So despite being told my whole life that I’m very very attractive and just all around great and how any guy would be so lucky to have me, I have never ever been the type of girl that any of my exes or guys I briefly talked to or dated or just men in general would like “come back to”. Like I’ve never been the type of girl that has all these guys in her dm’s all day and like this guy wants me and that guy this and that and blah blah blah. But I have always had gfs who were having these experiences and would show me all their messages or matches or be like “omg guess who called me 11 times last night, my ex” and I’d be like wow! How come none of my exes miss me? How come none of the guys that met me or dated me come back to me? Why doesn’t anyone think of me?? I’m not gonna lie, it made me feel inadequate or “not good enough” at times. I felt like I just wasn’t desirable to men.

I also always hear things about how girls are dealing with so many matches on dating apps and being overwhelmed and guys just being all over them (even if their intentions aren’t good). But I’ve had very different experiences with online dating. I get matches but not too many, mainly because I am picky but right off the bat I get a sense that the guys I’m talking to are very standoffish toward me. This is just how my interaction has been with men in general, not just online. Idk maybe it’s because I’m standoffish toward them? I don’t think I am though.

What’s posted in this tweet is her realizing that she shouldn’t be so available, which is great! I totally stand by it. But for me, I never had to realize this, it almost feels as if I am already subconsciously equipped with this defense/demeanor that protects me from men with sleazy behavior but at the same time I have to be honest, since I wasn’t shielding these men off on purpose, I would have moments of weakness and doubt and think well what is wrong with me?

I still don’t know the real reason why I’m not a “man-magnet” but I.DO.NOT.CARE. When I think back to those moments of “weakness”, I laugh lol. Why did I care so much??? Honestly, even if the case is that I’m just not desirable to men, who cares????????? Why does it matter? I think it’s because of my own culture (Middle Eastern) + the weird obsession our society puts on women that your sole purpose on this earth is to GET VALIDATION from a man. Hence why my friends (who I’m no longer friends with) would flaunt their messages and dm’s.

Feministtiktok · 2021-08-27T20:21:44+00:00

Ouch but needed to hear that

LikelyWriting · 2021-08-27T18:47:13+00:00

This used to be me! No more of this!

amanda-manda · 2021-08-27T20:54:12+00:00

I used to look forward to them " coming back" and most of all of them did at one point...i took breakups, ghosting as a sign I wasn't good enough, but if they came back I was good enough and I made excuses for the guys ( timing off, I didn't show enough interest, I didn't go to his house for a 2nd/ 3rd date 🤦, the reasons are endless). Gaslit myself is what I did.

None of them are in the pic today tho!

feminologie_ · 2021-08-28T01:03:51+00:00

I'm so glad I found FDS after my LVM ex broke up with me. I leved up so much. Just as predicted, he came crawling back trying to rekindle things a full year later, even though HE was the one who lied to me and emotionally abused me. He couldn't admit what he did but was still begging for a second chance. Thank God I was no longer a pickme so I blocked and deleted him. FDS taught me so much. It made me realize how little self respect I had, how little I was willing to settle for. In my pickme days I would have felt honored that a scrote came crawling back and would have accepted his nonsense because we were mEaNt tO bE. Now I am disgusted by these men who would rather emotionally manipulate a woman back into a relationship instead of actually get themselves together and be the kind of man she wants and needs.

One_Bat_2525 · 2021-08-28T03:29:19+00:00

In my experience, all exes get in contact with you after some time. The thrill for me is blocking and deleting. Learned that it was an absolute must the hard way.

I once was set up on a blind date and it was clear that the guy wasn’t over his ex. He messaged me after letting me know how busy he was and how he couldn’t find the time to meet again. At that point, I took that as an “I’m not interested,” and moved on. One month later I receive a text from him. My gut told me not to bother replying but my pickme friends told me I should respond. They kept going on and on about how sweet it was that he reached out to me and I must be on his mind and “now the timing was right”. I took their advice and responded. Long story short, I had to move away because of the anguish this situationship bought me. Block and delete. Always.

girl_in_red_costume · 2021-08-27T21:03:12+00:00

I'm sad to say I've been there, but at the same time I'm happy to say this will never happen again.

GreatOrchidAmbition · 2021-08-27T20:10:04+00:00

Breaking this down, do they start panicking because they think they're missing out on The One which is somehow now you, or is it FOMO, or is it just let's see if this girl well say hi for a quick ego boost?

Also, what if you cursed them out and called them a loser who didn't make enough money and would never be at your level and that's why you dropped them because you knew you could do better? What would hurt more?

__kamikaze__ · 2021-08-27T22:54:45+00:00

So many of us have been fed this lie. The truth is it’s far, FARR from a romantic fairytale.

If they do come back it’s usually for an ego boost or cause no one else wants their ass

VanessaViews · 2021-08-28T01:15:54+00:00

Ugh I wish I knew this when I was younger

Faefae33 · 2021-08-28T01:48:37+00:00

I would truly love to believe there is a good man out there who wont put me through crap, but I'm starting to believe that's just a fairy tale.

SimplySharon1215 · 2021-08-29T15:57:25+00:00

This can be true with new men also. I’ve had to be really careful not to fall into the trap of wanting to be desired and settling.

spicyspa · 2021-08-28T06:23:22+00:00

Ice 💧 to the face.

DuchessDurag · 2021-08-29T04:25:23+00:00

Send him back to the streets 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

pozzalovah · 2021-09-12T23:40:20+00:00

Gotta be proud when no lvm dares to text you!

Title	When you see it..
Author	blueboobs-
Upvotes	2384
Comments	65
Date	August 27, 2021 5:42 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/pcs7ke/when_you_see_it/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/when-you-see-it.1065381 https://theredarchive.com/post/1065381

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