Why cheating is now a good thing

nebthefool · 2022-08-25T13:20:25+00:00

This is precisely the sort of shit that pushes men further down the red pill rabbit hole. When you read an article like this it can be very hard to remember

-woman are just as moral as men, broadly they aren't more or less predisposed towards shitty behaviour than men,

-the presence and evidence of women devoid of a moral compass doesn't mean the majority of women aren't decent and well meaning people who will, nevertheless, make mistakes from time to time.

-stuff like this is almost always on the fringe. It'll get parroted my prominent media because an article talking about healthy monogamy would be much less interesting to read and generate far fewer clicks. It's outrage media at it's finest.

OGBoglord · 2022-08-25T14:53:38+00:00

"women simply need variety and novelty of sexual experience more than men do."

"Men who have regular sex with their partners are more satisfied sexually and with their relationship, but it’s not the same for the women."

These are standard Red Pill talking points, only gender-swapped.

Deadlocked02 · 2022-08-25T17:03:59+00:00

There’s a survey from 2019 with some interesting results.

A 50-year old man has recently admitted to you that he has had an affair outside of his 20-year marriage. He feels bad about his actions and is asking you for advice on what to do next. He explains that his marriage hasn’t been very fulfilling for several years. His spouse is very critical of him and they have not had sex for over a year. He feels unloved.

However, for a random half of survey respondents, all the gender markers were changed to make the scenario about a woman, not a man: Same circumstances, just a different sex for the cheater. Participants were then asked how likely they were to give particular kinds of advice to the cheater. They were given a choice to choose between different kinds of responses.

For example, 49 percent of men and 53 percent of women said they would tell a male cheater, “You made a marriage commitment that you have broken and should feel sorry.” In contrast, only 39 percent of men and 37 percent of women would say this to a female cheater. The circumstances were identical, but men and women were both more likely to tell a male cheater he broke his commitment and should feel sorry.

When given the chance, 55 percent of men and 62 percent of women said they would tell a male cheater that they "should have tried harder to fix your marriage" before they cheated. But when given the chance to offer the same reprimand to a woman who cheated, just 48 percent of men and 45 percent of women said that they would do so. Men and women are more likely to tell a man he should have tried harder.

The lesson: Even though society has established a specific level of disapproval for cheating generally, we treat those guilty of infidelity differently. We appear to be less forgiving of cheating men and more likely to blame them for their infidelity, as compared with cheating women.

palescope · 2022-08-25T19:43:08+00:00

I hate this world.

Man_of_culture_112 · 2022-08-25T17:36:54+00:00

GASLIGHTING TO THE MAX!!

Grow_peace_in_Bedlam · 2022-08-25T22:40:24+00:00

To make another comment, I'd like to say that this really seems to highlight the Women Are Wonderful Effect; in this case, in many people's eyes, while men cheating is seen as making men worse, women cheating doesn't make women worse, but rather makes cheating better.

Grow_peace_in_Bedlam · 2022-08-25T16:45:49+00:00

Great post! I've argued this very point, i.e., that the gradual disappearance of the idea of cheating as a largely male behavior has made cheating more socially acceptable. Yet, it's not hard to find serious websites arguing in very gendered terms against men that cheating is domestic violence. As someone who has been cheated on by multiple partners, I hate this new culture of excusing cheating (especially cheating done by women) and the detrimental gender double standards that have come with it.

2022-08-25T22:36:40+00:00

Every day I lose more hope. I feel like my eyes and ears are constantly being assaulted with this type of shit that just demotivates me.

BloomingBrains · 2022-08-25T20:16:09+00:00

This really doesn't surprise me, feminists have been defending cucking for as long as I've been involved in gender politics. Its just another extension of the "rules for me but not for thee". I've even seen feminists arguing that its their "duty" to sleep around so they can try to get the most "fit" male with the best sperm. Remind me again of how women are NOT baby machines?

Even if cheating was encouraged for men, the sad reality is that women would still have the advantage due to their easier access to sex and inherent sexual value. So we would end up in a situation where the average woman gets 4-5 guys but the average guy has to settle with that 1 woman and he would be lucky to even get that. Reminds me of this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tI-CcQEpBN0

Shit like this makes it obvious why the red pill rage is real for so many men. The narrative is so openly and ridiculously biased towards women that its disgusting.

Cuoz · 2022-08-25T22:58:48+00:00

I think women have more power when it comes to sex, so naturally are in a better position to cheat.

gopherish · 2022-08-25T19:53:24+00:00

Gross.

neighborhoodpainter · 2022-08-26T18:54:19+00:00

Women are wonderful. If a woman does something, it must be for a good reason. No woman would ever do anything bad, unless an evil man tempted her to do said bad thing. If you disagree you're a misogynistic, incel racist.

jmcsquared · 2022-08-25T21:10:40+00:00

The only good thing in that entire article is the part where they say, “the new research is correcting false notions that women have lesser libidos." Well, no actually scientific research has ever suggested that, though culture sometimes tries to insinuate that.

But the rest of that article sounds like it wants to turn all men into Will Smith clones.

The ending is some particularly ridiculous bullshit:

"Imagine how much better relationships would be if couples understood that when a woman starts to feel sexually bored, this didn’t have to mean the end. Think of the marriages and relationships that could be improved if women could discuss their desire for sexual adventure and work with their partner to find solutions that bring them closer together."

One, that's a very roundabout way to tell men they should just be ok with getting cheated on.

Two, replace every instance of "woman/women" in that paragraph with "man/men" and tell me that it still makes any sense whatsoever.

GorchestopherH · 2022-09-01T21:53:30+00:00

One of my bigger regrets, a close friend back when I was finishing college was having various problems with his fiancé.

Everyone blamed him. Told him to get his act together.

Turns out, she was evil, she pregnancy trapped him with the child of someone she cheated on him with.

Sorry man, should have trusted you, we were all naïve.

ivorynotasians · 2022-08-26T08:33:49+00:00

Anyone else notice an increase in these kind of articles?

Rich_Tension9015 · 2022-09-01T17:45:43+00:00

They should just have an open relationship at that point. If people feel the need to cheat, they should express that to their partner, and both sides should be allowed to do as they wish. Honesty and openness seems to be a much needed missing factor in these situations

RedCascadian · 2022-08-25T22:05:51+00:00

I didn't interpret the article as saying "now cheating is good." It used morally neutral language because it was quoting a research paper which should be devoid of tone, specific, and as dry as -Twitter reference goes here-

There was that one woman who admitted to having lots of affairs and tried to justify it.

But the conclusion was "now that we know this, we can think of better ways to address it than committing infidelity."

The article was more neutral than I like regarding the woman who seemed indignant that she was expected to be faithful, she sounds like she just needs to find an openly poly relationship.

However an article like this would get a lot of clicks and shares from pissed off incel men, which is probably why NYP ran it.

th3empirial · 2022-08-25T21:11:10+00:00

This is pretty funny actually haha a lot of these points have been made with the genders swapped

M_Salvatar · 2022-08-25T15:10:12+00:00

The sheer hypocrisy. Ah, you westerners are entertaining.

frackingfaxer · 2022-08-25T13:07:05+00:00

Monogamy has worn out its welcome. Personally, I believe it's a recent social construction in the grand scheme of things. In pre-civilizational primitive communism, we were neither monogamous nor polygamous; we were promiscuous under hetaerism. More like bonobos.

I don't have a problem with what this article is saying per se. What bothers me is that if the article were talking about how men cheating was understandable, because men "need variety and novelty," people would dogpile it for being sexist, misogynistic, "men don't have needs, they have wants," patriarchal excusing of bad male behaviour. So long as we can be open and honest about the sexual needs and wants of both men and women, I'm alright with it. Only then we can improve heterosexual relationships and get overcome our heteropessimism.

infinitofluxo · 2022-08-25T12:39:55+00:00

"Where have all the good men gone?" Now you know, right?

The only solution to this mentality is to avoid monogamous relationships or relationships at all. There is a clear attempt to turn men into cucks, which will obviously do extreme psychological damage to most men. The only safe way to be with this kind of women is to know they are not monogamous and you shouldn't be.

Of course it is going to be hard for men to find more than one sexual partner at a time, but at least is will be an open wound that we can try to fix. Some might get into paid sex to get even.

madonnamanpower · 2022-08-25T14:12:23+00:00

Seriously when is society going to figure out that discussing non-monogamy isn't caused by a lack of love?

Trust and discussing things is completely different from being "faithful" because that's not a commitment to your partner it's a commitment to society.

Sure some people do want to be monogamous but you have to ask them. Not just assume societal prescriptions apply to them, otherwise your not having a relationship to the person, you're having a performance for society.

Edited to follow rules

Mirisme · 2022-08-25T11:59:53+00:00

Are you trying to say that women are morally bankrupt? I'm trying do discern what you want to express but I'm unsure what to take from that.

Lumpy_Shake2890 · 2022-08-25T13:30:27+00:00

Had to at least glance to see who wrote this, and low and behold, a woman.

DandyDoge5 · 2022-08-26T07:43:15+00:00

Weird

nomino3390 · 2022-09-15T21:59:14+00:00

Jesus, the stupidity required to be biased enough to blame everything on men and not realize that it's ignorant and sexist.

Here's the truth: MOST WOMEN REFUSE TO COMMUNICATE ABOUT SEX. They have always had the privilege of not having to have even slightly uncomfortable conversations (read:only a tiny fraction that men have to experience to get their needs met, all else being equal) and still be handed friends, sex and relationships on a silver platter (again, relative to men and all else being equal).

Most women refuse to communicate about sexual needs, when asked, they just say "I don't know", "it's fine", "everything's okay" because they know they can easily monkey branch whenever they're dissatisfied.

Peptocoptr · 2022-09-25T17:43:11+00:00

Where exactly does it say that women cheat more in the article that you linked? I don't see it

Title	Why cheating is now a good thing
Author	griii2
Upvotes	241
Comments	169
Date	August 25, 2022 11:53 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates/comments/wxc68c/why_cheating_is_now_a_good_thing/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates/why-cheating-is-now-a-good-thing.1129402 https://theredarchive.com/post/1129402