I need feminism because....

IS44 · 2014-03-28T15:32:08+00:00

Oh, and someone even posted with a 'counter story' down in the comments:

Want a counter story?

Probably not, but I’m posting it anyhow.

One of my hometown neighbors was a high function autistic guy about 5 years older than myself. He could hold conversations, knew right from wrong, even held a job, an actual job not a ‘poor you’ bullshit job. You could tell he was not quite normal, but he got around pretty well on his own.

Just after he graduated, around the time of a town festival, he stuck his hand down a 12 year old girl’s pants and groped her. Police were called, legal action was threatened, but his mother came swooping into to save the day with ‘he doesn’t know right from wrong, he’s autistic’. She claimed that she would put him in counseling, and that was that.

6 months later, he does it again. Another 12 year old, his hand down the front of her pants.

I spoke with this young man on many occasions, he walked past the house often and he liked to talk to people. He knew how to behave appropriately, how to interact with people in an appropriate manner. The second time was met with harsher reaction, ‘he doesn’t know better’ wasn’t going to work, and his mother had a court order to actually put him in counseling, since she didn’t do it the first time.

I’m not telling this story to rail against autistic people.

What I’m trying to say is that I don’t think autism should be an automatic shield against punishment.

If someone clearly has issue understanding appropriate behavior, then punishing them isn’t going to work well. If they’re like my former neighbor, autism shouldn’t be a ‘Get Out of Jail Free’ card.

Hold up, everyone... let's go back to one minor detail in this story:

high function(ing) autistic guy

Let me explain some things about this word we use in the world of autism: it's called the spectrum. It's a scale, and it's a brilliant way of saying, "People are different."

Here's something I hate about the spectrum - or rather, people's reactions to the spectrum: I have to explain and re-explain and repeat myself to someone like this every damn time they come along and try to 'counter-story' with something that is not even remotely the same.

As someone diagnosed with high-functioning autism, I do indeed know the social boundaries of right and wrong, and I know it's wrong to stick my hand down someone underage kid's pants; that's just a given.

Here's what else I know: I am eons away from the bullied child mentioned in Liv's comment. Eons. He and I share a trait of mental function, but we are not the same, not even close.

Yes, I hate it when people try to use autism as an excuse for bad behavior. What I hate more, though, is this stupid assumption that autism automatically = one well-defined function of the mind. It just pisses me off for a whole boatload of reasons.

TL;DR - I am not the goddamn Rain Man. Neither was the man in the counter story... but that bullied boy probably was.

chavelah · 2014-03-28T18:47:23+00:00

This person may not need feminism, but they sure as hell need a long-term custodial arrangement for their child if they are so disabled that they are going to grow up unable to regulate the impulse to grab strangers' breasts. People like that need and deserve a caregiver within arms' reach at all times when they're out in public. The fact that this is hard to come by is a social problem that needs to be addressed.

Professor_Yaffle · 2014-03-28T18:20:33+00:00

Teach him not to be autistic.

SnowyGamer · 2014-03-28T19:52:06+00:00

That sign doesn't make any sense. Is it a troll?

killbasasausage · 2014-03-28T22:15:14+00:00

I don't like this. Autistic persons for the most part do not impulsively touch people. Someone who is autistic might lash out at people and hit people if they get overwhelmed or too stimulated, but usually they don't even like touch at all. Someone with an autistic son should know that.

And if your child has a mental disability that leads them to touch strangers in public at all, not just a woman's boobs, they need to have someone with them at all times.

ArnoldSnail · 2014-03-28T21:05:09+00:00

If he's already assuming his son won't be able to control himself, and that lessons on appropriate touching won't help, the fact of the matter is that he should be treated as a danger to society. His motives may not be sexual but he would still be violating those around him.

damnBcanilive · 2014-03-28T18:48:26+00:00

Who are all these people blaming women for rape? I'm pretty sure 90% of people are blaming the rapists.

sRazors96 · 2014-03-28T21:13:27+00:00

I would be pissed if someone just went up to me and touched my breast, but i do think that groping someone who is fully clothed on the chest equals sex offender is kind of stupid.

joeydeuce · 2014-03-28T20:08:21+00:00

garblegarble12 · 2014-03-29T01:06:05+00:00

I feel that 'autistic rights' should be kept separate from this sub.

JerfFoo · 2014-03-28T20:58:08+00:00

Hi feminist here, I think an autistic kid who doesn't know better should be prosecuted if he impulsively touches a woman's breast - said no feminist ever. Sometimes I hate this sub.

SpanishGuy · 2014-03-28T19:33:31+00:00

There is a related story too:

Liv here, with another high school story and how it relates to this;

As you all may know, my high school was fucking sketchy and skeevy. It was full of hicks and in the middle of a fucking field. The closest thing to it was a run down museum and church, a useless fire hall, and a DIRT FLOORED CONVINIENT STORE WITH AN INDOOR OUT-HOUSE. Let that sink in for a minute.

That being said, all the kids were pretty much the normal fucking high school kids; jackasses with no sense of style with bullying around every corner.

One day I was sitting in my Science 30 class and we heard tittering. Anyone who has ever been in a high school knows that “tittering” is the sound that stupid teenage girls make when they laugh en mass. It echoed down the hallway for about a minute. Then it grew into real laughter, followed with some comments (that we couldn’t hear) and grunting.

Suddenly screaming.

Do you know what happened?

Five grade ten girls had cornered an autistic boy (he was on my bus and was a friend of mines younger brother) and were picking on him—pushing him, hitting him, calling his names. After minutes of this going on (keep in mind we could hear the laughter when it started) he finally snapped and grabbed one of the girls and picked her up by the neck and slammed her against the wall for a few seconds (screaming ensued) and then ran away while they were freaking out.

He almost got expelled. A mentally handicapped boy who was being picked on by five girls who though it was funny that he’s retarded almost got expelled for defending himself. He didn’t know that choking is really bad. He just wanted them to stop, and lashed out.

But do you know why he almost got expelled?

The girls stated that he groped the girl he slammed against the wall before he ran away, EVEN THOUGH THE WHOLE INCIDENT WAS CAUGHT ON SCHOOL CAMERAS AND NO SUCH THING OCCURED. The girl, and all her friends, claimed that he sexually assaulted her, when he didn’t, in an attempt to get back at him. They claimed he was a threat to the safety of students, and it was a huge thing. The boy who did it literally had no clue what was going on, he had to deal with people pushing him more and calling him names, until the school cracked down and told everyone that those girls were liars and it never happened.

This picture actually made me almost cry because it reminded me of that boy on my bus and how he was a victim, even when he was made out to be a villian.

It's from heroinfriday

(Tumblr "repost and add" format is the fucking worst format I've ever seen in the fucking history of text formats. Duh!)

Number357 · 2014-03-29T03:51:39+00:00

He should add to the end of that sign "...even if he's 12 years old when he does it." It's absurd that kids are placed on the sex offender registry for life.

Akesgeroth · 2014-03-29T00:28:49+00:00

Okay, this? This is bullshit. Your kid being autistic doesn't excuse his behavior. It explains it, but it doesn't excuse it. If he were to impulsively punch or strangle people, he would undoubtedly be judged a danger to society, same goes for fondling people.

I know it's hard for a parent to deal with the fact that their child is disabled, but the moment you begin accepting their aberrant behaviors, you begin favoring those aberrant behaviors.

scolionophobics · 2014-03-29T04:53:16+00:00

"grows up and impulsively touches a woman's breast..." haha. Whooffff, youre right. Scrap feminism. Tell them to go back to the drawing board. Lets go back to the 1500s cause this kid will touch breasts. I can tell just from the picture.

Title	I need feminism because....
Author	blueoak9
Upvotes	636
Comments	113
Date	March 28, 2014 2:59 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/mensrights/comments/21lgy9/i-need-feminism-because/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/i-need-feminism-because.1615783 https://theredarchive.com/post/1615783

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