Gender Roles are Unnecessary

wtknight · 2022-04-11T01:05:38+00:00

Re-flaired as CMV as this post is making an affirmative claim.

EulenWatcher · 2022-04-11T04:16:56+00:00

I agree with it, but I don't think we should turn it into extreme. The goal should be happy contented relationships and not equality "on paper". There are some things we can't really divide like the burden of child birth and all risks and complications tied to it. Men are also usually stronger than women and it makes sense they do more physically demanding tasks around the house. Not that they should just because they're men, but it comes out of a sensible division of labor.

People also can deal with income disparity in different ways. One partner can support the other while they're studying or working on their career, they can have shared budget or divide spending according to their income levels etc.

My husband and I are egalitarian, but we aren't interested in dividing everything strictly 50/50. I had no issues with being the only one working while he was still studying. He doesn't have any problems with carrying heavy bags. He's planning to get a car and he'll be the only one dealing with it, as I can't be arsed tbh. I don't even have a license, I have terrible eye-hand coordination. But I'm the one taking care of our diet and his medical prescriptions, because, well, he doesn't bother with these things either. I'm better at writing down our long-term plans in all details and he's better at taking care of technical issues etc. etc.

Sudden_Difference500 · 2022-04-11T04:41:19+00:00

The only reason for me as a man to provide resources to a women is when she is the mother of my children. Other then that I would never invest any money in a women that goes beyond what I would do for a male friend.

Initial_Chemical7121 · 2022-04-11T01:46:33+00:00

We are not equal though. Men and women are biologically different. The traits we have that set us apart make us work well and harmonious together as couples though 🥰 Everyone has an important role

StarchRunner · 2022-04-11T01:12:20+00:00

Equality is life of modern life. No one is equal. It's a truth you rarely hear but see every damn day. Get used to it.

Creation_Soul · 2022-04-11T08:12:52+00:00

I think "equality" is not the correct word here; that word should be "fair". My wife and I share the workload in the house, but we don't actually keep the score on who does more work as long as we both consider it fair.

For example, I do 90% of the cooking, while she does 90% of the cleaning. I like cooking and hate cleaning and she is the exact opposite, so each does what is good at.

Successful relationships require some compromises (100% compatibility in everything is impossible), but what those compromises might be differ from relationship to relationship.

januaryphilosopher · 2022-04-11T00:22:30+00:00

You're not arguing that gender roles are unnecessary. You're arguing that any roles in a relationship at all are unnecessary. And I think it's important to specialise in what you're good at, which everyone gains from. But you shouldn't choose this based on gender stereotypes, just what you personally want. (Also, if nobody pays for the date, the date is either free or that's theft.)

Puzzleface62 · 2022-04-11T00:17:34+00:00

It's Sunday night and you're still drunk?

creekcrystall · 2022-04-11T02:23:45+00:00

“Nobody should be paying for the date.”

Sure and have the cops called 😂

Entire_Country140 · 2022-04-11T01:40:26+00:00

No one pays for a date.

We do a runner.

AutoModerator · 2022-04-11T00:14:30+00:00

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.
For "CMV" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

Boxisteph · 2022-04-11T10:52:15+00:00

Gender roles are very necessary at the point where you hit biological milestones of adulthood. I.e. having children. At the point a woman is pregnant she is disabled with varying degrees and may die from that condition. That's why many women want a competent man, she requires practical help. When the baby is born, her body is recovering, the first 13 weeks when the baby has no routine, there's a big shift in hormonal changes and breastfeeding is at its most painful she needs a masculine type reliability and focus supporting her.

Until then, I agree, gender has no fucntion

sarkington · 2022-04-11T01:32:09+00:00

It’s the age old battle between the individual and the collective

It depends on what you value and your circumstances, really

cuckedalt · 2022-04-11T01:07:18+00:00

Nobody should be paying for the date.

The pay gap remains, and even as it fades, let's not pretend that dating is a vacuum--it is a prelude to relationships, which often lead to babies, and of course women are the only ones that can get pregnant, not to mention that statistically women are doing more than their fair share in domestic duties and child rearing. Then there is the disproportionate risk that women face when dating itself--like the saying goes men's worst fear is that they'll be humiliated while women's worst fear is that they'll be murdered.

Not to mention the disproportionate costs women bear to meet the beauty standards expected of them.

Demanding equality only on who pays for a meal is empty...will men carry the baby like a seahorse? No? Well then, will men at the least share equally in domestic duties and childrearing, and make it so dating is not disproportionately riskier for women?

Regardless, what's the big deal with paying...afraid some other guy will be willing to pay

LittleDragonMaiden · 2022-04-11T00:32:01+00:00

It’s ok if you personally don’t want to embrace gender roles, they aren’t forced anymore, but I’ll continue to enjoy them. The great thing about living in a free society is you can do as you wish and find people compatible.

MarBitt · 2022-04-11T06:00:53+00:00

Equality, egalitarianism or bust... I understand the supposedly natal feeling of provision or nurturing. However, your head should rule your feelings about nature.

In relation to yourself, your loved one, your family or all people, always prefer what kind of people they really are and love them like that, before what you would like them to be (your illusion about them).

Giving priority to the dream illusion of people over real people, brings disappointment in personal relationships and dictatorship and wars in politics.

So the question is not whether people should rule with their heads over feelings, instincts and nature. But whether they do. And the answer is resounding no.

In addition, if a woman can be pregnant, give birth and breastfeed and a man cannot, then the existence of gender roles is biologically conditioned. And because successful reproduction is necessary for humanity, gender roles are also necessary.

On the positive side, equality, egalitarianism and the existence of gender roles are not excluded at least ideologically, religiously. You can be equal, even if you are not the same. In practical life, equality is nonsense. The billionaire and the homeless, health and the sick, an unskilled worker and a CEO, US citizen and a Haiti citizen, talented and without talent... are not equal. At many real, practical life-influencing levels.

NockerJoe · 2022-04-11T03:08:50+00:00

One group has a signifigant bonus on basically all physical stats and the other is physically disabled for like 6 months to a year if they have kids lets not pretend otherwise.

Jakes1967 · 2022-04-11T07:12:49+00:00

Gender Roles are Unnecessary

Ukraine alone disproves this.

Rufus_Reddit · 2022-04-11T14:02:33+00:00

There are lots of societies that do just fine without the English language. That's evidence that English is unnecessary. Are there any societies without gender roles that do just fine?

Of course, absence of evidence is not evidence of absence. So let's suppose - for the sake of discussion - that gender roles are 'unnecessary.' Is that really enough for us to spend the time and effort that would be involved in removing them from our social norms? Should we get rid of English because it's unnecessary?

ruboyuri · 2022-04-11T16:32:46+00:00

To individuals, no

To society, yes

abaxeron · 2022-04-11T17:56:41+00:00

If income disparity is a thing

And height?

ZealousidealAd7191 · 2022-04-11T22:03:58+00:00

Good luck with that…

H8beingmale · 2022-04-13T00:26:39+00:00

ya but men being expected to make the first move or approach women, ask them out first, why do i get the feeling that will never change

eyewave · 2022-04-11T07:09:43+00:00

primal instincts always beat "feelings" or "reasoning"

Diabetes9111 · 2022-04-11T00:34:28+00:00

I would advise American men on here to pay for their dates. If you don't follow social rules, you won't get very far anyways.

WilliamWyattD · 2022-04-11T03:59:00+00:00

We cannot escape gender roles and expectations, no matter how much we try. I also don't believe we should want to, even if we could. But since we cannot, it is more of a matter of deciding what those roles are, and how strongly they are enforced, within biological constraints.

The issue is that since we have this bullshit idea of there being no gender roles, the process of updating and balancing them for today's world has been thwarted. There's no overall mechanism for trying to ensure any sense of balance, and the roles and expectations are applied willy nilly, often selectively for a given person's personal advantage.

BecretAlbatross · 2022-04-11T11:50:24+00:00

Say whatever you want, but nobody wants actual egalitarianism. Women want masculine men who lead. Asking a girl to split the check is the easiest method on earth to getting friendzoned. People on Reddit can say whatever they want forever but in real life it doesn't work that way.

Ohmaygahh · 2022-04-11T20:22:49+00:00

Gender Roles are so deeply embedded in being human, it can never be sublimated; and to try to invites perversion, unhappiness and chaos to the natural order of relations between Man and woman.

Shredddz · 2022-04-11T22:02:44+00:00

well, nature disagrees. we are specialized to fit a role and we need to do them to keep humanity going, because evolution programmed out genes to be that way. if gender roles are removed, society collapses and people are forced to conform to nature to survive again. there is no escape from this force. Gender roles are as necessary for human society as the suns gravity is to the solar system. without it, the system breaks.

flow3rpowr · 2022-04-12T01:09:53+00:00

Egalitarianism is the entire point of feminism...

Title	Gender Roles are Unnecessary
Author	r2o_abile
Upvotes	17
Comments	186
Date	April 11, 2022 12:14 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/u0utqx/gender_roles_are_unnecessary/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/gender-roles-are-unnecessary.1110411 https://theredarchive.com/post/1110411

Comments