Is stereotypical masculinity less attractive today?

Silver_Past2313 · 2024-02-18T17:32:14+00:00

You have self described liberal feminists saying they can't find men that look like "conservatives" but believe what they do. It's in demand just as much as it was 20 years ago, but of course people want to have their cake and eat it too.

wtknight · 2024-02-18T17:23:31+00:00

Women like confident men who will be good protectors and providers, but I think that most want egalitarianism, too. So I don't think that it's any less attractive. It's that women's own power expectations are greater now, as well.

Zabadoodude · 2024-02-18T17:46:32+00:00

These traits are still very attractive to most women. Men that expect total submission and obedience or have anger management issues aren't, but men that just embody the masculine traits you listed are very much desired.

SoRoodSoNasty · 2024-02-18T17:33:45+00:00

Women are highly attuned to that being a curated image versus an innate presence. So no it’s not unattractive, we just know when it’s natural state of being versus when someone is trying to project the image.

jay10033 · 2024-02-18T17:37:12+00:00

They want men who are stronger, taller, more dominant who make more income than them who will reduce themselves to equal status with them, yet assert said attributes to everyone else other than them.

ashpr0ulx · 2024-02-18T17:24:28+00:00

i prefer masculine men myself, but i think younger women might skew the other way.

Spicy_take · 2024-02-18T20:01:37+00:00

In short, no. That’s why men are complaining. Because women just as readily date bad men with those traits as good men with those traits. I don’t care what women say. Actions speak louder than words, and I’ve witnessed plenty.

bluestjuice · 2024-02-18T17:49:09+00:00

Broadly speaking, confidence, assertiveness, competence, and being able to articulate needs and boundaries are attractive traits, especially for well-adjusted people looking to form healthy relationships.

Dominance and a strong personality are a little more individual. Some people prefer a dominant partner to compliment their submissiveness, some people prefer a dominant because they themselves are dominant and want someone to meet them at their level, and then of course some people would prefer a more submissive or laid back partner for the same reasons. Strong personality could mean a ton of things both good and bad, and people have varying preferences; some like someone intense and others prefer someone laid back.

Even women who want an egalitarian, feminist pairing generally want their partners to be confident, on top of his shit, and decisive.

Few-Laugh-6508 · 2024-02-18T18:29:56+00:00

Traits such as assertive, dominant, strong personality and boundaries. Seeing and knowing yourself as a sexual person ie you aren’t ashamed of the sexual aspect of masculinity

These are all desirable traits. It beomes problematic when it is used to degrade women, see women as subservient rather than partners, etc.

just_a_place · 2024-02-19T01:41:40+00:00

Dominant is not a stereotype of masculinity when you notice that it is usually 1 in a Million men who are the leaders. A stereotype would mean a trait that is uniform and predictable across ALL men, not just the top 1%. Therefore, stereotypical traits of masculinity are:

Assertiveness
Independence
Craftiness
Aggressive (even the most docile men have this trait in larger quantities compared to women)

Toxic Masculinity doesn't exist. Ancient wisdom already has a name for the negative traits across all personalities, they are called vices. Such as, wrath, pride, vanity, lust, or greed.

Masculinity is not less attractive. The problem is that modern women who are indoctrinated in college become confused as hell about their natural attraction to masculinity and the indoctrination that they receive which tells them that they should have these masculine traits in themselves and still somehow feel attracted to men who should not have these traits (toxic masculinity). Basically, women are told that they should wear the pants and then get confused as fuck when they feel naturally attracted to the natural pants wearer.

It's a perverse way of believing that masculinity somehow belongs with women, and that men should be stripped of it, and hand it over to women; otherwise it's toxic, therefore, only women can be trusted to hold on to masculinity in themselves. Hence, why you see this idiotic obsession in modern media with the hyper masculine "girl boss" trope. The whole thing is so incredibly stupid and laughable if it wasn't causing so much brain rot in a lot of men and women who keep swallowing this stupid kool aid.

Jaded-Worldliness597 · 2024-02-19T17:47:08+00:00

It's actually MORE attractive. Look at the studies coming out of Sweden. The more equal men and women are in terms of pay... the more women focus exclusively on masculine traits to choose men to have sex with.

This is why all the liberal femboys are maniacally depressed and trying to be gay. They are fucking fools of the most epic proportion.

MongoBobalossus · 2024-02-18T17:38:32+00:00

No. Being confident, direct, and assertive are always attractive.

spanglesandbambi · 2024-02-18T17:28:13+00:00

What is attractive is personal preference, so this is pie in the sky, really.

I love how you have to frame women as negatively for not liking what you think they should. Maybe just don't date if you can't accept people's free will.

footfetishjimmy · 2024-02-18T17:45:03+00:00

No, but they tell you the opposite so they can find simp beta cucks to give them free shit

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UrbanChampion · 2024-02-18T21:24:45+00:00

Modern day feminism amongst Gen Zers and younger Millennials that's been popularized by gender studies in college, influencers on social media, and other things like body positivity/fat acceptance and Female Dating Strategy looks at "old school" masculine men as being "the patriarchy". So, to be honest, the only types of men these women will even want to be around will be "safe" types of men. Examples include men with squeaky voices; men who are afraid of guns and martial arts training; no muscular development above that of a 13 year old; vegans; male feminists, socialists/Marxists, and men who identify as anything other than cisgendered; men who "can appreciate a women of size", and men who do not work in blue collar skilled trades. I have a feeling that a lot of males are either purposely or subconsciously turning into those kinds of..."men"...just to stand a chance of getting a small scrap of attention from a woman.

GojosLowerHalf2 · 2024-02-18T19:31:33+00:00

Traits such as assertive, dominant, strong personality and boundaries.

For me I generally like nice, kind, caring, and confident men. Assertive and dominant aren't normally adjectives I would use to describe those men.

Im seeing it more and more that women today aren’t equipped to deal with typical masculine men

Or perhaps they just never like those types of men but now they don't have to stay with them anyway out of necessity.

DickTracysThompson · 2024-02-18T21:05:42+00:00

I’m pretty masculine and I’ve attracted women who simply enjoy tearing masculine men down.

Strong_Instance3974 · 2024-02-18T17:41:40+00:00

Yes, but they tell you the opposite so they can find simp beta cucks to give them free shit

campskills21 · 2024-02-18T18:31:18+00:00

What in the world… yes girls still find those qualities very attractive.

Professional-Yam601 · 2024-02-19T06:37:17+00:00

I honestly don’t think most men or women are equipped to have this kind of relationship. There is a mutual respect and trust that needs to be had.

Men don’t just get to boss the women around with their masculinity. If we’re talking more traditional roles, men lead, women guide. Women GUIDE. Not women are bossed around by the dominant personality in the relationship. Relationships with traditional masc/fem roles seems completely lost on majority of people. Where men make decisions and women advise on them- and if there is a mutual trust and respect there would be a rare occasion where either are unhappy.

It’s a societal problem where people feel entitled to get their way, but that’s not how partnerships work. It’s not a gendered problem at all.

funfacts_82 · 2024-02-20T11:15:55+00:00

In short: no.

Safinated · 2024-02-18T17:40:15+00:00

Obviously yes

Suspicious_Glove7365 · 2024-02-18T18:19:08+00:00

Literally just read another post that was from a guy bemoaning how it’s impossible for non masculine men to get with women because all women want is a traditionally masculine man. What would you say to that guy?

operation-spot · 2024-02-18T23:25:19+00:00

I don’t want to be with someone who wants to control me, I want them to have control over their own life and emotions. There’s nothing for me to be jealous about, I just don’t want to live with someone who acts like that.

I want to be with a confident person who has something going for them in life bc because I’m the same way. I don’t want a man who cosplays traditional masculinity to hide his true feelings of fear and self loathing that often results in him wanting to control me.

krackedy · 2024-02-18T17:31:25+00:00

I think most women still like those traits. I find masculinity hard to define though. I possess those traits, but physically I'm not masculine (short, skinny, not much hair, young looking face) and I'm bisexual. I don't usually consider myself a "masculine guy" even though I guess I would be. I think that tyoe of confusion might be why some women think they're into less masculine men because they find guys that don't LOOK masculine hot (k pop guys etc), but they're generally still masculine.

HumpsyDumpsy · 2024-02-18T18:13:01+00:00

It's not that those traits are less attractive, but rather they are old and tired stereotypes, and seems like more women of today value the softer and vulnerable side of masculinity that's often overlooked- like the willingness to value her pleasure in bed, and the little things like how much he listens etc.

Im seeing it more and more that women today aren’t equipped to deal with typical masculine men.

What exactly are you observing? How does that tell you women aren't "equipped"

TSquaredRecovers · 2024-02-18T18:31:32+00:00

There’s this misconception within “pilled”spaces that stereotypically masculine men can’t be liberal or prefer an egalitarian relationship dynamic. I have found that this can’t be further from the truth.

All of the men I’ve dated, with the exception of one, have had a traditional masculine appearance (strong, athletic, masculine facial features—a couple were former star athletes, including my husband) and personality traits (confident, assertive, leaders at work, etc.). At the same time, they’ve also eschewed traditional gender roles, preferring an egalitarian dynamic instead.

So, I think that many women still want a masculine man who doesn’t insist on following outdated traditional gender roles. These men exist in greater numbers than some in this sub have been lead to believe.

boom-wham-slam · 2024-02-18T19:33:43+00:00

Im seeing it more and more that women today aren’t equipped to deal with typical masculine men.

Agree. But they desire this more than ever before.

Homoaeternus · 2024-02-18T20:10:32+00:00

Women love masculinity so much nowadays they are becoming more like men.

Obvious-Produce2720 · 2024-02-18T21:01:35+00:00

I dont think it's less attractive as it's more shamed. As a woman who is with a more masculine man in a lot of ascepts, women who find that attractive can be shamed for liking it. I know i was.

Pleasant-Speed2003 · 2024-02-18T23:31:32+00:00

No, just people want different things to eachother and the main "talked about" body image changes as we stop talking about past things.

DeJuanBallard · 2024-02-18T23:58:50+00:00

The parts that benefit them no, the parts that don't, yup.

AidsVictim · 2024-02-19T04:34:58+00:00

It's mostly a reflection of the liberal/conservative political divide, although it's much more commonly a mix between the two rather than an absolute extreme to one side or another. Liberal women are more likely to be attracted towards effete/non masculine men and when they are attracted to masculine men they prefer their politics to align. More conservative women mostly just prefer more masculine men period.

Or just be handsome enough and it doesn't matter much.

DangerousSoftware741 · 2024-02-19T16:46:04+00:00

It think it just manifests differently. As someone who who does BJJ and kickboxing as hobbies and can throw around a good bit of weight, these things are useless in modern society. They won’t help me pass my classes or get a good job. However being a provider, being confident and having resources are still greatly desired.

apresonly · 2024-02-21T18:56:06+00:00

its hard to deal with a person like this.

and if you don't have to in order to survive, why do it?

Title	Is stereotypical masculinity less attractive today?
Author	No_Historian_1601
Upvotes	10
Comments	181
Date	February 18, 2024 5:19 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1atz978/is_stereotypical_masculinity_less_attractive_today/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/is-stereotypical-masculinity-less-attractive-today.1245779 https://theredarchive.com/post/1245779

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